Hikari's Note: Ikaga desu ka, minna? This is my first Gundam Seed fan fiction and it'll definitely revolve on AthrunxLacus and KiraxFllay. I may not please all of you but please be fair enough to respect my views regarding these couplings. I'm not here to compete with other seed-couplings and authors. I'm just here to share my story to everyone. And that's about it, sore dake desu. I hope you'll enjoy reading, have a nice day!
Chapter 1: Deep Reflections
Fllay Allster? Who is she?
Assumingly, everyone sees her as the spoiled brat who gets what she wants in anyway around and mostly, she gets it in a selfish way. That was true;she intended to infatuate Kira so that she can use him as an object of her revenge. She hate coordinators and Kira is one of them, but hell to that fact, all she wants from him is to let him execute everyone who had caused her burdens and she'll do that, whether he'll die along or not.
Kira Yamato? Who is he?
He's the coordinator who has a strong personality but deep inside he's actually feeling down due to certain problems regarding the war, the people he's protecting and his enemy who happens to be his best friend. He's feeling down yet no one knows that and no one seems to care.
Being alone with these problems, his heart started to seek for comfort, for deep affection, for some one to lean on and Fllay took this opportunity for granted.
"I'll be alright because Kira will protect me, he'll kill them all for me" that was her usual line and now everything is going smoothly with her plan. He fell in love with her; with the false thought that she loves him too.
They're mutually inclined with each other and even up to the point that they're having sex already. She's in control and with her manipulating him; he was more persuaded to fight and to protect her.
The others can already sense her plan and now they marked her as a bitch, something worse than being marked as a spoiled-brat. But of course Kira is blinded because he's in love and he only believes in her.
(Memories from the past)
A little girl about 7 years old was watching the people around her from a corner. While watching, she realized that she's different from them. Is it because she's wearing the most expensive and beautiful dress? Is it because she's rich and dazzling? Is it because she's born with a pretty face? Or is it because she's alone while the others are celebrating this day with their family
"Why are you celebrating alone again?"
"Because my daddy is busy but he told me that he'll make it up for me, he'll buy me everything I want"
"You're so pathetic Fllay Allster! You have no mommy and your daddy has no time for you. How pathetic, even your parents don't love you! You'll always be like that, alone and unloved"
"That's not true! I hate you all and I will forever!" she said, pushing her classmate before running away from them.
She walks over to the fountain in the ORB Park and looked at her reflection, there she sees a girl who seems to have everything except love. Seeing how sad her reflection was, tears started falling from her eyes, mixing with water in the fountain.
"Why are you a-alone? Are you also s-sad? Just like me? Please don't cry in front of me, y-you're making me cry too and I shouldn't cry because my Daddy will buy me lots of dress and dolls and he told me that I shouldn't be unhappy as long as I get what I want" she said to her reflection, simply consoling herself.
She grew up living in that way, where she thought having everything she wants would make her happy, where materials serve as the substitute for the presence of love but how can you expect a little girl to avert this insanity? When no one's there to guide her? Where no one makes her feel loved?
Yes, she gets what she wants and she has everything already but why is she still discontented? Revenge, that's what she wants now and she was able to acquire it by using Kira. Is that what she really wants? If so, why is she still unhappy? Have anyone tried to ask why she's acting like that? Have anyone tried to understand her and look beyond the negative attitudes she's showing?
No one did because they judged her already. No one understands her. No one was able to look beyond the negative attitudes she's showing. No one's aware that she's acting like that to conceal her true feelings. No one was able to realize that she desires for love all along. That's what she really wanted and yet she hasn't got it, that's why she was never contented. No one was able to give it to her, no one except Kira.
She thought materials could satisfy her, she thought using him would make her happy, she thought revenge was the only way to end her miseries. She thought succeeding with her plan is what she wanted and little did she know that his affection for her would change her views.
After realizing that he was the one who quenched her thirst for love, she started seeing him in a different light. He was neither the coordinator she hates nor the one she's using for revenge. She didn't expect that along the way, his kindness and affection for her would make her change. Little did she know that she would develop the same affection for him, loving him back isn't included in her plans but she couldn't resist it.
He was the one who gave her the love she desires all along and she's so much satisfied with it already but something inside her is still bothering her.
She clutched the blanket tightly while staring at Kira, who was sleeping soundly beside her "I really do feel at ease when you're with me. I have everything because I have you and I wouldn't want anything or anyone except you" she said while gazing at his peaceful face and doing this makes her heart leap but then something inside her heart is preventing her from staying at peace. What is it? Why is it bothering her now? Why now that she's happy already?
It was really bothering her since the day she realized that she's in love with him too, she wanted to know what it is but then her mind is too sleepy to handle it and her body is already giving in the urge to sleep.
She moved her nude body closer to him and when she's finally comfy, she closed her eyes and dissolved the remaining thoughts on her mind and when everything was blank, she finally fell asleep.
After some hours of sleeping she was waked by the sound of the pouring water in the shower room. She opened her eyes and saw a blurry vision of Kira dressing back in his usual uniform.
She sat up, clutching the blanket to cover her naked body. This was the second time they did it but she feels different this time. It's as if she did that because she wants to not because she needs to, as part of her plan.
She tried to stand up but her body refused to, she's still feeling weak after doing a tiring activity with him "Oooouch! My body aches..." she groaned in pain while crouching down.
Kira sat beside her with a naughty grin "It's my fault isn't it? I've been enjoying it too much, last night" he said while scratching his head. Fllay smiled back while wrapping the blanket around her shapely body "I have to agree with that! So, are you…going now?"
"As usual, I better go ahead before some one sees us here" he stood up and was about to leave but then
Fllay clutched his shirt, making him pause "Kira…uhmmm…t-take care of your self ok?" she said softly. It was the first time she told him that and he's not the only one surprised by it. She is surprised as well, for the first time, she didn't say her usual lines.
He held on her hand and smiled "Hey, I'm just attending an official meeting but don't worry I'll always take care and I'll always come back because you're here" he assured her before leaving. Alone in her room, she started wondering about what she just said earlier. "I didn't really expect to care for him that much but I really do, now" she thought to herself.
Fllay Allster? Kira Yamato? Who are they? A Natural and a Coordinator? Yeah, right! They might be different from each other but both were able to see and fill the emptiness of each other. She sees her reflection in him, the reflection of emptiness and now she knows that he's just like her in some aspects. Their difference isn't important, what matters the most is they're whole when they're together.
After that, she went over to the cafeteria where the others are having their breakfast. She sat alone in the table while the others are actually staring at her. Of course she's aware about the gossips about her and Kira spreading around but she's just trying to ignore it.
And soon Miriallia and the others joined her but it seems that Sai is not there for breakfast, he was staring at her suspiciously and it annoyed her. She thumped her hand over the table, making her meals jump "Will you stop staring at me like that!" she groaned irately.
"I'll stop if you'll stop using Kira! You might have fooled him already but you can't fool us, we all know the game you're playing!" he retorted. "I'm not using him and I'm not fooling him! No-not anymore!" she yelled back, catching lots of attention.
"Not anymore? Then why are you still inclined with him huh? How dare you brain-wash him? We've been friends for years and yet he believes in you over us! "he retorted, merely forgetting that they're not alone.
"Look who's talking! Why? Did you see the emptiness beneath the strong attitude he's showing? You don't know that because you don't have the initiative to ask how he really feels about fighting! You should've been sensitive to his feelings if you're his friend! And me? You don't really know me! You can never understand me because you never took the chance to understand me! All of you are the same, you never care so you don't have the right to say anything against him or me!" and with that she ran away from the cafeteria, leaving Sai and the others speechless.
"I was criticized again but at least I was able to leave something for them to realize. Hopefully, they'll understand us now or if not me then at least Kira" she muttered before going back in her room.
Kira was called by Captain Ramius and Commander La Flaga to discuss about Athrun Zala, who's currently staying with them. The Zaft had lost the Freedom with out any clue that it was Lacus Clyne who took it and entrusted it to Kira, after a casual encounter with him. Both of them might be on the different side but they have the same will and intention, a pure intention to end the war and that's why she's positive to entrust it to Kira.
And now that it's lost, Athrun was ordered by his father to search for it and to bring it back but after having an encounter with Kira and after talking sincerely with him; his will is also starting to change bit by bit. He's still confused about the sudden facts but he's certain that he won't fight against Archangel anymore. Now, he just needs to straighten things up with Lacus and his Father.
"So it was Lacus...She'll be in trouble if Zaft finds out...I need to talk to her at once" Athrun said anxiously.
"How can we be sure that you won't go back with Zaft to spill everything out and to oppose us?" Commander La Flaga asked, trying to scrutinize the situation.
"Spilling it out to them is just like killing Lacus myself, I know I can't gain your trust easily but please let me see her, I need to make sure that she'll be all right" he explained intellectually and with further sincerity to his words and with the help of Kira, he was able to gain their trust.
After the long conversation, Kira went back to check on her. He went inside her room and saw her staring at the window, He sat beside her, merely startling her.
"H-hey seems like you're reflecting for something so deep, Is anything wrong? Is it them again?" Kira asked.
Fllay shook his head and forced a smile "I don't really mind them, Our world is full of judgments and I'm used to it already" she said still not taking her eyes away from window.
Then she faced him back "Kira, you won't leave me right?" she asked out of no where.
"I won't" he answered consistently and after hearing his answer, she clutched on his shirt tightly and locked her lips on his. He was initially surprised but it felt so good and he was left with the urge to kiss her back. Damn it just feels so good!
After doing so, she broke away from his moisten lips "Kira, Do...Do you want me? T-tell me that you want me..." she asked with her head down but her grasp on him became tighter, showing her eagerness to know.
Kira placed his arms on her back and pulled her close to him "I love you" he answered tenderly, keeping her safe and warm on his arms. "I don't know why you're asking these questions but I really do love you" he repeated. (Moo ichido itte kudasai! Awww…)
She buried her face on his chest to hide her reddened cheeks (Kanojo no hoo wa akai desu!);no one knows how much she loves his manly scent, his well-built arms around her, the warmth of her body and everything. No one knows how much she loves being close to him but what she loves the most is his answer and in fact, she's so much satisfied with it. But still; something in her heart was bothering her "What is it? Why do I feel bothered every time I'm happy, every time he's being affectionate to me? What is this damn thing that keeps on bothering me? For once, why can't I be happy?"
Hikari's Note: Soko made wa sore de yorishi! Somehow Did I make the details more vivid huh? How did you find the character of Fllay Allster now?
If we see a negative attitude to someone, we tend to ask "Who the person was" instead of asking "Why is she/he like that?" and with that action, we are judging instead of understanding, true isn't it? Well, we're really living in a world full of judgments and that's typical! But I think, it's time to make a difference now and we can if we want to!
That's it, that's the lesson of this chapter! I hope, somehow I was able to make a difference! And now, don't forget to give me some reviews! Pleaaassseee! Oh yah, the AthrunxLacus chapter is next so stay tuned!
Domo arigatou gozaimasu!