Chapter 18: Fears

Week 8

Things have been going really fast these past couple weeks. I know it seems crazy but ever since that day I turned him into a sea horse we seemed to have gotten closer. Oh mom, is this what love feels like? I wish I could tell him how I feel but that wouldn't be....

"Hey, are you just going to sit there like a space cadet or are you going to give us a hand?" Kyo asked in his usual mood from the door way. Tohru had been wiping off the table when apparently she had spaced out again.

"I'm sorry. Is something wrong?"

"Why the hell else would we be here? Where's that damn Hatori?" She sighed, sometimes Kyo really did lose his temper but she supposed she understood. Something was obviously wrong. She just hoped it wasn't too serious.

"Kyo, it's not nice to talk to Tohru like that."

"Hatori's out with a patient but I can help you, if it's not too serious. I mean I am only a doctor in training but..."

"Akane is running a temperature. We tried some medicine and it just won't go down." Kagura looked up with tears in her eyes. "Can you help her?"

Kagura handed her the child and for a second Tohru was taken back. Akane was so small and obviously had a fever yet still she reached out and grabbed her her hair. She's sooo cute but now isn't the time for that. I really need to get this fever down.

Tohru checked her vitals and listened to her heart and her breathing. "She's got a cold. She's so young and she probably hasn't been sick so her body isn't used to it." She got a very small needle and gave the baby a shot that made her cry but oddly enough the child didn't fight her too much.

"How did you know she didn't get sick before?" Kyo looked curious and she found herself smiling sadly.

"Your health records are good and you've always taken really good care of yourselves right? Well it's safe to say that good health passed down to Akane." She disposed of the needle and gave Akane back to Kagura. "She'll be fine after a couple days. I'm sure of it."

"Oh thank you. I'm certain you'll be an excellent doctor." Kagura smiled. "Hey Tohru?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you leave?"

"Kagura!" Kyo snapped and she sighed. Tohru felt tears in her eyes but she managed a smile.

"I'm sorry but I really don't know what you're talking about." She couldn't possibly tell them. What if Akito found out? What if Akito already knew she was there? She didn't want anyone to get hurt especially because of her. On the other hand she loved them so much and never wanted to leave them again. Oh mom, what am I supposed to do?

"I'm sure you had your reasons just as you do know but you know... the Tohru I knew once told me that you should tell people how you feel and what's on your mind. No matter what it is. I miss that Tohru but you know the one I see now isn't too bad either." Kagura smiled and Tohru took her hand.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry but I really can't tell you what you want to know." They knew who she was but she hoped that it would be kept a secret especially from Akito and she figured the less they talked about it the better the outcome but what if she had it wrong?

"It's okay. Sensai says that all things are revealed in time." Kagura smiled.

"Sensai?" She still could play along.

"See you later. Come on Kyo. We need to get this baby in bed and I have to make dinner." At least Kagura's cheerful self was back. She dragged Kyo out the door and when Tohru was sure they were gone she let the tears fall.

Oh mom, I finally have my family back and more. I'm so afraid of losing them. What am I supposed to do? I feel so... so lost? She rested her face in her hands and heard a soft ticking noise. She looked at the watch Hatori had gotten her and actually felt a sad smile.

No matter what happened she would always have the zodiac close even if it was just a watch. "I'm back." Hatori said. "Though I'm not sure why I'm announcing it."

"Welcome back." She looked up at him and his brows knitted together.

"You look as though you've been crying. Is something wrong?"

"Nope not at all." She shot up. "Well I guess there is... Akane got sick and they came and you weren't here so I gave her a cold shot and..."

"I'm certain you did the right thing. You'll make an excellent doctor." She felt her face turn red.

"Do you think so?" He nodded hanging his coat on the hook. He smiled at her and her heart did a little dance. Then his stomach growled.

"Hmm, it would appear I neglected eating today." Tohru laughed softly coming to her senses.

"I'll make you some dinner right away." He didn't argue and she headed into the kitchen. Oh mom, I'm still a little afraid but with everything that has happened I'm grateful, so grateful for this chance, if only for a little while to be with them again. For the first time in 9 years, I feel at home.