Precious Things
Chapter Three: Dark Waltz
Aurons entire form was shaking by the time he reached his room, several spots on his body glowing with the threat of pyreflies ready to escape. His back slid down the length of the door, once it was shut, his head falling into his hands, as he tired to regain control over at least some part of his being.
His entire body hurt and he was tired, but it was his mind full of racing thoughts, which bounced from one thing to another, that pained him the most. The flashes never giving him enough time to grasp what he was actually seeing. He was at a point where dragging another summoner to their death was eating away at the stern, self-centered man he had always been. The idea of losing, yet another person who meant the world to him, was enough to tear any man apart. He knew there had to be a way around everything but it wasn't up to him in the end, it would really be the boy who sealed their fates. Damn, he hated leaving things to someone else. None of this would have ever happened if he would have gone instead of Jecht, but would that have really made things any better?
'Why does it all have to hurt so much and why does it have to add to my torment of death.'
Was it not enough, to be dead? To have nothing in life at all: no family, no friends, just those he was suppose to watch out of duty. Auron shook his head as if to answer his own question. He had friends, six of them.
And that's when he heard it, the soft murmurs of someone or something by the bed. As he stood, he was confirmed that not only was it someone, but it was a certain girl, who would not give up on him, although he would be damned if he had not tired to push her away. 'I am already damned.'
So maybe she was his salvation, a precious item he should look after and protect. Yes, that is all she was, just another one of these damned children to watch over, to make sure they stayed alive to die in the end.
The throbbing in Aurons head only increased as he walked over to the sleeping girl and sat down on the bed quietly. He wasn't really sure why he was being so quiet; the girl could sleep through anything, well anything but thunder. 'Such a troublesome fear for her.'
Reaching his bloody hand out he carefully threaded a few strands of her hair through his fingers, making sure he did not get any blood on her. She had already been stained once and that was enough for one lifetime.
Everything Auron seemed to get near or as he hated to admit love, seemed to wither and die right before him. That was how it had always been, parents, Braska, Jecht, and now Yuna. He hated to even think about it, but right now, it was the way things looked.
"Things could be simple again, you could let it all be over." There the voice taunted him. The voice of his own personal fiend. Ironically, it sounded a lot like himself.
"Shut up"
"Just think about it"
"Nothing you offer will help" No one could help Auron anymore. He was sure of this.
"But I can offer you real death, a release. All you have to do."
"I know what I have to do." He had thought about it before and how easy it would be.
"One cut deep enough and you would be no more. You would not have to see any of them die. You could be free."
Auron slipped the dagger out of his sleeve and stared it and the back at Rikku. There were defiantly worse things to look at while dying, but what if she woke.
"She is asleep, and nothing will wake her."
Auron closed his eye and turned away from the sleeping girl. He studied the simple dagger in his hands and contemplated the choices, what he should do as opposed to what he wanted to do.
"If you need her that much, take her with you. Save her from dying in so much pain."
Auron looked back at Rikku and he felt his stomach turn.
He could not believe he had actually thought about killing her along with himself. He would be no fiend, no monster, not to her.
"You have already hurt her."
The dagger slipped from his hands, several loud clanks filled the room, metal hitting the hard wood.
Coinciding with the noise, Rikku sat straight up, her heart threatening to come out of her chest.
She was scared, so scared she felt like crying. But why she felt this way she had no idea, something just seemed to pull at her soul. 'What was I dreaming?'
Rikku rubbed her eyes; trying to make the dark shadow before her, form into some human shape.
"Auron?" There was no answer.
Leaning closer, she shifted to rest on her hands, until they meet with something wet on the bed. Eyes wide, she gasped at the warm substance on her palms. It was blood, the crimson color rivaling Aurons coat. Shocked did not describe the state of mind she was in, glancing over his shoulder, at the hand he was trying to hide and the blood stained dagger on the floor.
"What did you do?" Silence.
"Auron will you please say something." Her voice was higher than normal, panic setting in.
Still he said nothing, only looked at the floor. Auron didn't know what to tell her though.
'The truth would be a good place to start.'
'O shut up.'
Rikku climbed off the bed and knelt before the warrior, pulling a cloth out of her pouch. Carefully she took his hand in hers and began to clean and wrap the wound. Auron's flinching at the contact made her look up for a moment, but she wasn't sure if it was from pain or the mere fact she had touched him, and frankly she didn't give a damn. Fine! Be a big baby and give me the silent treatment. See if I care.'
Rikku added her own silent 'hmph' while she finished mending his hand. She intended to leave right after, maybe yelling at him first, but she would leave. Instead, she found herself holding his hand in her two smaller ones and staring up at him.
"You did this to yourself didn't you?"
Auron gave her a sideways glance and she noticed his glasses were missing. She looked him in the eye and pleaded.
"Why can't you just say something?"
Silence took over once again, as Rikku's posture began to slump and her hold on his hand lessoned almost to the point of dropping it. It was then as a last plea, Auron spoke.
"Thank you." It as quiet, and not very apologetic for anything he had done, but he could think of nothing else to say to her. He could think of nothing but her.
Rikku could not help but look back up to him and smile; a true smile, which he had not seen on her in days. How it hurt his heart to see her look at him that way. He was not worthy of such adoration. However, it had never worked trying to tell her that, but then again it was partly his fault.
"You should go now."
"No."
"Leave." 'Why must she be so stubborn?'
"Not until you tell what is going on." Auron visibly took a deep breath, trying his best to be angry with her, but realizing he was failing.
"There is nothing of importance to tell."
"Please. Why is it so hard for you to trust me." She was pleading, begging him to just talk: to just show her that he was alive.
Auron had never figured out how to push her away. She just always seemed to come back unfazed, although he knew it bothered her, no one was that much of a masochist.
Rikku pushed herself up, so she was halfway standing. Her intention was to move the cowl down so she could read his face. That damn thing, kept so much hidden.
But as she reached up, a bandaged hand grabbed her wrist pulling it to the side. Another hand found its place, on the back of Rikkus head, tangled in hair as lips met hers.
Rikkus eyes flew wide in shock at the sensation. At this point, she was pretty sure they were on the verge of popping out. Auron was kissing her and well that was not something she would have ever expected to happen. But here he was, the most clam look she had ever seen on his face.
'Is that a smile?'
Aurons eye opened slowly as he smiled against, a very shaken, Rikkus lips. From the look on her face, she was defiantly not expecting that. But then again, he had not planed on kissing her. He had planed on kicking her out. 'How things change.' For once in that entire day, he felt calm and there was no more pain. Being with her had always made him calm though, maybe even happy.
Rikku on the other hand was panicking. She didn't know what the hell was going on and wanted to run away and fast. It did not take long for that idea to reach her legs. Standing up and fumbling backwards, she stumbled over her words, never getting a single word out, before she had slammed the door behind her.
She fell to a life less heap at the bottom of the door, her face still burning a crimson red, from the shock.
He had kissed her and there was nothing chased about it either.
"I don't understand."
She sighed and traced her fingers over her lips.
"What happens now? Now that I ran away."
She leaned her head back against the door and smiled at the thought of Auron kissing her.
Auron, felt like a fool and sighed as a lone pyrefly finally made its way out of his chest.
Reaching out with his wrapped hand, he trapped it in his fist before crushing the light into darkness.
RR.
Eva Harlow