"Inter oves locum praesta, et ab haedis me sequestra statuens in parte dextra," "Recordare" Mozart's Requiem

"Provide for me a place among the sheep, separate me from the goats, guiding me to your right hand," "Remember" Mozart's Requiem

Lost Lamb

"Shit! What a big fucker," Pip grumbled as he coiled his braid tighter around his neck. Rain that had accumulated in the curves and contours of his hat over flowed to run down his back. The weather did nothing to lighten his mood.

This was supposed to have been a piece of cake. Quick skirmish in Scotland, clean out the riff raff in a town and be home again by dinner. It was easy, Bernadette went as far as to call it target practice, especially bringing along the vampires. Sir Integra felt that having them along would strengthen the bonds; after all they were going to work with these creatures. It's best to know a comrade from an enemy.

But that Alucard, "What a big fucker," he said again.

It was still early night, the clouds had just rolled in. Pip couldn't help but smile. Record time, the boss will be proud. In and out within hours was just what would set the standard for the rest of the Wild Geese's employment with the Hellsing Organization. "Alright, ladies, into ranks let's make sure no one's still tromping around in the dark." He went through the roster, matching names to faces.

Optimism rose as he got to the lower half of the alphabet, "Victoria?" No response. Shit fuck. "Seras Victoria?" He looked around, hoping to meet the gaze of the walking contradiction of every Hellsing instructional video he was required to watch.

"Captain, she's the vamp girl," Larry said, trying to be helpful.

"Yeah, I know. Where is she? Oi, Alucard, where's the police girl?"

The big red clad vampire with the harlequin smile leaned against a wall, his arms folded. His eyes half closed into slits, his fun was through and now he looked as though he were about to nod off. "None of your concern, Bernadette. She can fend for herself."

Pip gripped the clipboard at his side, smashing the end of his cigarette in his teeth. "I didn't ask that. Where is she?"

A gloved hand, glowing white in the darkness pointed into the mist beyond them. Pip may as well have looked with his long lost eye. There was nothing as far as he could see. "Out there, she's coming. Don't let her hold you up. She'll make it back." Alucard then let his hand fall to his side and made no other indication of moving from his spot.

"We can't leave her, Alucard," Pip handed the clipboard to the private at his side.

"Why not?"

Words would not form in Bernadette's mouth. "You can't possibly be suggesting that we leave a-an agent of ours out there?"

The shock from the human's face did nothing to change the vampire's tune. Alucard reached into his coat and calmly placed his glasses away as he spoke, "Police Girl is a midian, a pitiful one. But a midian all the same, she needs to learn to fend for herself. There is no reason to coddle her."

Asshole. "I am not leaving without every living-" Bernadette stopped and shook his head in midsentence. What was he doing trying to reason with Alucard? The cigarette dropped from his mouth and was crushed underfoot. He then turned to his troops. "All of you, stay here and radio in our status to base. Do not leave," he turned and looked at Alucard for a moment but then turned back to the soldiers, "any of you."

Of course the radio didn't work in this situation. It worked only to contact the base, so well in fact, that anyone on the other line could even make out Sir Integra grinding her teeth at the news of delay. Communications between Seras and the team was nothing but a crackle. From time to time Bernadette still would try as he made his way back to the ghost town remains. "Bernadette to Victoria, come in Police Girl. Where you at?"

Pip sniffed and whipped the rainwater from his nose. Damn cold. He had been walking a while now, past the place where the humans and vampires parted ways to cover more ground. There was a lot of damage done, that's for sure. It would take quite a bit of explaining to any visitors, that was for another branch of Hellsing to take care of.

Sure is sad the way the entire town went under, guess that's what happens when the undead attack small towns, he thought to himself as he carefully picked his way through the streets. Pip sighed and ducked under the porch of a house, trying again with the radio. "Bernadette, here, Bernadette to Victoria. Come in, Victoria." He moved fifteen paces forward, "Can you hear me now?"

The line hissed above the patter of rain. He shook the flimsy bit of plastic and technology. "Papa Goose to Batgirl! ET phone home! Car 54, where are you? Marco? Calling all fish out of water!"

The line then clicked, "Uh -aptain? –toria here" for a moment the line went cold dead and Pip shook it against his ear, "-by a church."

Finally. "Stay where you are, Batgirl. I'll be there soon." Placing the radio in a dry pocket, Pip found the church in no time. Sure enough, there she was. The Halconnen was upright, she held onto it with both hands. Although Seras was hunched and standing, it was as though the cannon was the only thing holding her up on her feet. She lifted her head as he approached so that a baby blue eye visibly glowed beneath her soaking wet hair to watch him. Only for a moment did Bernadette realize that he had gone out of his way to get a vampire, a soldier of his yes, but a vampire who looked a great deal like an ordinary girl. If it weren't for that strength and those teeth, and the entire not living aspect, she would have been like everyone else. "There you are."

She straightened more, at attention. "Are we moving out, Captain?"

Her hair looked funny to him, all flat against her head like a near drowned cat's. What was Alucard's problem, leaving her out here like that? "Er, at ease. We've moved out."

Seras blinked and a light pink came to her cheeks. "I-I'm the only one out still?"

Pip gave her a kind smile as he stood at her side. "Yeah, but not for long, come on." She nodded and slowly began to move, humiliation written all over her face, as they fell into stride. He glanced at her with his good eye, noticing that she had taken note to walk on his visible side. Did she do that on purpose? "So uh, what were you doing all the way out here?"

"My master asked me to. He said we would cover more ground." Her tone was far too light and casual, as though Alucard didn't nearly leave her in another country.

He's an asshole. "That sounds logical, I guess. We made record time. Pretty easy mission though, eh?"

"Right, easy." His attempt at friendly business chat didn't wipe the look off Victoria's face.

They fell into silence, the conflicting tattoos of the pitter patter around them and their footsteps the only sounds. So much for light and idle chat. What do you say to a girl who's got a pinup physic that could (and would) kick your ass by flicking you? "Captain?"

"Call me Bernadette or Pip, Police Girl. I am your captain too but it's not my name."

She flung a glare his way, "Only if you call me Seras, Pip."

"Right then, Seras. What?"

"Why did you come back for me?"

"Why?" Why wouldn't he? "Well you can't just leave a man behind. Especially one that is useful. It's wasteful, ridiculous. Besides, a woman alone on the streets this time of night! Tsk! Tsk! What will people think? Vampire or not, a lady needs an escort unless of course," he couldn't help but snicker, "you're completely comfortable with being a nightwalker."

Seras sputtered. "Wha? You! Ugh! N-no! I mean, why are you here with me right now?"

"Why me? Because I'm responsible for you, I'm your commander. If I say its time to come on back, you come on back. And if you aren't there to hear the order, it's up to me to get it to you somehow. And I wanted to go for a walk because it is SUCH a nice night." He held out his hand and caught some raindrops in his palm.

She couldn't help but laugh, at least her escort back was cheerful for a change.

"Did you expect Alucard to come get you?"

The laughter died away and Victoria didn't speak for a few moments. Pip watched as breath flowed out from her mouth and wondered of she realized she was still breathing out of habit. "No," her reply came. "I thought maybe I would find you all myself." Her face was not angry, just resigned.

"Heh, even as vampires, I guess no one has a sense of direction," Bernadette fumbled for a cigarette, trying to gloss over the awkwardness that settled between them. He turned the box over in his hands, getting ready to put it away. "Want one?" he held out the carton.

She turned up her wrinkled nose in disgust. "Are you insane? No! It's a vile habit - it could kill you."

"No, I'm not insane. I'm gonna die soon anyways," smoke rolled from his lips and into the air, visible despite the persistent rain.

"That's a terrible thing to say!" Blue eyes blinked at him, taken by surprise by the flippancy of his words.

She's too good to be true! "Maybe, it's true though. Maybe not this year, maybe not next year or five years from now, perhaps even tomorrow but I know I'm going to die. Hopefully soon so I can leave a gorgeous corpse. It makes for a better viewing at the funeral, with lots of flowers." The stopped walking he put a hand on his hip, the other tipping his hand over his face grinning from ear to ear. "I'm dead sexy as it is."

"You-you have got to be kidding," she looked up at him, or rather looked over him and rapidly looked away.

"Come on, Police Girl. Bet you haven't seen much better," Pip stuck out his hip out farther, and pushed up his hat with his pointer finger. If he could wink, he would have. Did she know how much fun she was? Had it been a clear night, he would have started taking off his shirt.

The look on her face, the way her eyebrow rapidly twitched and her lips pursed, was priceless. He soaked up her gaze as though it were a spotlight, "I don't even want to know who led you to believe those things."

"Oh, no one needs to tell me. I just know I am. Does the swan know that it is the loveliest of birds but pales in comparison to the goose?"

"Does the goose ever shut up?"

Pip made a very nasal, deliberately French laugh. "You're pretty hot stuff yourself, girl. No need to feel jealous."

For the life of her, she had no idea what to say to this infuriating man. Was he kidding with her again? It was hard to tell. Seras coughed and looked at herself. If anything, she felt cold. The rain soaked her to the skin, and the uniform really wasn't letting anything hide. She felt exposed. Bernadette had a sense of humor that didn't quit, and she doubted if he had ever taken anything, even his own life, seriously. Annoying as he was, her captain was refreshing.

Nonetheless, she held the cannon in front of her, as if it would ward him off. "Do you ever quit it? This is for beating you up isn't it?"

"Granted we had a pretty unpleasant meeting, but I think I'll keep you. No revenge needed… yet." He laughed, smile widening. The cigarette stuck out erect from his lips the entire conversation. After taking a long deep puff he held out the box to the vampire once more. "So I'll ask you again, want one?"

"Git," she muttered and shook her head furiously. Droplets of water went into the air, most hitting the captain in the face. He abruptly stopped walking when the spray got into his good eye.

"God damn it, Police Girl! You gonna take the other one from me?" he growled as he rubbed at his eyelid, utterly blind for the moment. Seras laughed and poked him in the side, making him wiggle away. Her smiling face came into his sight as he took his hand away.

Her face fell abruptly, the cannon's butt thudded against the ground.

The cigarette drooped from Bernadette's lips, "Now what did I d?" He was unable to finish. When he blinked, a metallic clang hit the air. In the brief second of darkness his breath left his lungs as weight settled upon his chest and threw him off balance. "Ow! Fuck!" He shouted as his limbs became entwined with the vampire's. They tumbled across the muddy road, splashing through puddles until they came to an incline and settled forcefully at the bottom. Victoria landed on top of him. Pip blinked and found the view rather pleasing.

"I knew you wanted to jump my bones but you could have given me a warning," he said, his voice muffled in her breasts. The police girl grabbed him roughly by the hair and tilted his head up out of the trench they stopped in. Ghouls, one after another, rose up from the earth, their gnarled hands clawing upward right in the place where they were standing. Just like in the movies, he thought to himself.

"Heh, I guess I should have known that this was too good to be true," Pip grumbled as he picked up his cowboy hat from the mud, already his head was soaked, so much for keeping his hair dry.

She was out from beneath him in a second. "What do we do, Captain?"

They both looked carefully over the crest of their makeshift trench. "Looks like the ghouls are heading toward the rendezvous point." Pip figured the reason why vampires made so many was because it took loads of them to make up the intelligence of one kindergartener. He'd have to remember to ask Alucard or Sir Integra about that later. These ghouls were weaving and shuffling around, heading indeed toward the direction of the waiting Hellsing operatives in a very pokey pace.

Seras gripped his arm. "Where everyone else is?"

"Yeah."

"What are you waiting for? We need to warn them! Use the radio!"

Pip eyed the flimsy contraption attached to his jacket. "I wouldn't trust that thing as far as I could throw it. The rain is messing with the reception."

"Then what do we do?"

"Police Girl-"

"It's Seras!" she hissed with indignity.

"Right, Seras, sorry. Where is your cannon? We could send up a flare to let them know there is trouble."

If it were possible, the vampire would have paled as she frantically looked around the ditch. "I-I dropped it when I saved you! It must have rolled to the other side of the road if not-" she eyed the large numbers of marching feet. "Bugger!" She hiked up her skirt and threw a leg up on the rim of the ditch.

The flash of white knickers was distracting. Pip forced himself to pan back and take in the big picture. "W-what do you think you're doing!"

"I have to get it! We have to warn the others!"

"Are you crazy? Get back here! You can't just jump out here!" Bernadette roughly grabbed her by her other leg and tugged her back into hiding, luckily the ghouls were so focused on their destination. She fought him and made to kick at his shins, he let go of her leg and held her tight against him. Pip had no idea she had it in her, granted she gave him a hell of a beating just flicking him, but this was crazy. Adrenaline was on his side, but he knew if she didn't calm down he was screwed. "Seras, stop!"

She was furious. "Let me go! Don't you care what happens?" Her minds eye would not stop the image of bodies lying across the hallway, green uniforms tainted brown by pooling blood. The smell and feel of blood on her hands was so real right now, she felt like she would scream. "No!" she growled and bared her fangs. She squeezed her eyes shut but the memories kept coming. Sir Integra holding her back, the look of disgust on her face and Walter's. They looked at her like…like… Monsters! Monsters had to be stopped!

Pip recognized a post traumatic episode beginning when he saw one. Vampire or not, she needed to snap out of it and fast. He let go of her torso and firmly held her face in his hands. "Oi, Victoria! Seras!" She stiffened, no longer violent but squirming, trying to pry herself completely away from him. If he wasn't leaning against the grassy side of the trench he would be knocked over again and then some. Girl didn't know her own strength.

"Look at me, petite. Sshh! Just look at me." Blue eyes held a red tinge with small and shaking pupils, not good. Bernadette kept eye contact as he spoke, ignoring her gnashing sharp teeth. This was what worked with a human, would it work for her? Pip hoped so. "Calm down. There are too many of 'em to sneak by unnoticed," his breath was warm across her face. "I know you want to help. I know you do. Just stop."

"B-but we have to warn everyone or cut off the ghouls!" her voice was a lot deeper and richer then she would have liked it to be. The rich color of his eye transfixed her. Seras could smell the very blood rushing through his veins and a prickly salty smell she assumed was the rainwater. Everything was too rough, too bright, and too potent around her. None the less, there her captain was, refusing to let the savagery inside of her take the reigns. Her breath became frantic pants.

"Let's do what we can, don't forget that Hellsing and the Geese are always ready. This is their job. They have a mission like you, are you going to deny them that? There will be another time for you to be gung-ho." Seras stilled at her captain's words totally now. He made no comment about her cooperation but did allow himself to sigh, his forehead brushing against hers. As soon as his hands were on her, they were gone.

"Y-yes, Sir," she replied at last. The red of her irises disappeared to nothing as she looked away, ashamed. What a way to show your captain what you're made of. "I'm sorry. I just-"

"Don't worry about it, just duck and cover." A smile ghosted across Pip's face as he drew a grenade from one of his many utility pockets.

Their bodies crouched low together as the grenade hit the air and landed right in the middle of the moving ghoul battalion. The explosion briefly lit up the rainy night. Mud went flying along with limbs. The ghouls were tossed this way and that looking like discombobulated toys. Seras shivered and hoped that it would be mistaken for the jolt of the blast. Pip sat up from his crouched ball and put a hand on her shoulder. "Go on, girl. Get the cannon. I'll cover you."

The police girl scaled the rim of the ditch and recoiled at the sight of writhing dismembered bodies. Among the gore and blood, her cannon lay in plain view. Seras smiled and scooped it up, holding it close briefly as if it could feel her relief. As she shoved a single shell into the barrel, she was sure that the spirit of the Halconnen would scold her over this incident. She took aim for the sky and pulled the trigger, being pushed back by an inch from the recoil. The sparks from the shell erupted in the sky reflecting the falling drops of rain and looking like fireworks.

"Pip, I did it!"

Her joy was short lived as a ghoul filled her vision reaching for her with its grubby rotting fingers. Apparently, there were quite a few that were still not dashed to bits by the grenade. She swung the cannon, not having time to blow them away with it. Gunfire cut the air around her, heads and chests bursting open. Flowers of blood blossomed within Seras's vision. Excitement thrummed through her, edging her toward fear at moments, but never over the edge. True to his word, Pip was right there with the fire power and she made it back to the ditch.

"Good going," he said, unleashing another round on the few, still mobile ghouls. Victoria beamed as she set the enormous barrel of the cannon up and loaded up as well. Bernadette found himself smiling too. "Target practice."

A heavy duty armed car, they recognized in an instant just then pulled up close, squishing what ghoul remains had not be turned to dust. From the momentum of the wheels, muddy water cascaded over Pip and Seras before they could cry out for the driver to stop. Larry stuck his head far out of the passenger side window, using his hand to shield his head from the rain. "Oi, you alright, Boss? We saw a flare."

Larry got a face full of mud as Bernadette responded, "I look like fucking Swamp Thing. It's raining like a son of a bitch. And you ask me if I'm ok? Let us in the car before you ask questions, stupid!" At once the door swung open, the captain climbed in and offered Seras his hand.

She took it, and didn't meet his eye as she allowed a smile, even if she was a sight, caked in mud and probably gore from the ghouls.

The soldiers were huddled against a building's awning, talking and smoking. They straightened to attention as the truck rumbled closer. Alucard stood in the rain, face tilted upward. Eyes were hardly opened as he gave the cool greeting, "Welcome back, Captain. Did you find the lost lamb?"

The police girl looked down in shame as she stepped out into the rain again. The mud was coming off, but she wished she had something more permanent to hide from her Master's eyes.

The asshole never quits. "Yep. It went fine."

Alucard opened an eye, white flash of teeth gleaming, "nice to hear that your retrieval went without incident."

Pip couldn't tell if it was a smile or a sneer that came to Alucard's mouth. He didn't want to know really. The captain turned to his troops, "Right, ok. Whoever isn't here, raise your hand. Anyone? Anyone? Good. Let's get the hell out of here."

Seras joined ranks in their roll call order. The helicopter that had been waiting for sometime started up and everyone began to climb in. Bernadette went in last, Alucard behind him. Part of the bonding exercise was sharing the close quarters of the heli. The vampire sat back, eyes closed and arms crossed.

Pip stared at him. What a fucker. I bet he knew the ghouls were there.

I did. Alucard opened his eyes, smiling. His voice reverberated through Bernadette's ears as though the vampire had actually spoken.

"You bastard. If you are going to talk to me, talk to me."

"I have been called worse. Please don't hold back on my behalf."

"Why the hell did you let her go out there alone?" He didn't even want to think of what would have happened.

"She needed the practice."

"So in order for one to practice, they need to be stranded and without instruction a long distance from base?"

"It's no use explaining the ways of the undead."

"Non, non. Please, I insist Monsieur Alucard, explain to me your logic," his voice threatened to increase in volume but there was no need to let the whole chopper hear. "You are some kind of pumped-up, pimped out vampire to my understanding that has been around for-bloody-ever, great for you, even moreso for Hellsing. But, you are toying with one girl's life. She probably doesn't even know what the bloody hell you mean when you say ways of the undead."

"She isn't human, Bernadette. Treating her as one is a waste of both your time and hers."

"With all respect due and given," he hissed, "let me be her captain and do my duty as such, by ensuring she isn't abandoned and mauled by ghouls or herself because some blood sucker hasn't given her the time of day to teach her what's what in terms she could understand."

Alucard's red calculating eyes stared at him. "I have been allowing you to be her captain, like it or not I am her master—not you." Bernadette looked away, pressing the side of his face against the icy glass of the window. In the glass, he couldn't see Alucard's reflection and was glad for it.

The vampire saw that as a victory and not stubborn silence. His body began to fade away to nothing. "You Frenchmen are all the same;" he said with a laugh, "for now, this infatuation of yours is amusing."

Warm house, warm coffee, warm clothes after an equally hot shower slowly lightened his bad mood. Dry clothes - much better, at last Pip Bernadette had a real smile on his face as he sat on his bed. He bent over and pulled the black guitar case from under him. The familiar instrument fell into his hands as he leaned against the wall, legs folding under the hallow body of the guitar. With practiced ease he strummed his way through songs old and new enjoying the smoldering smoke. It was easy to let the time pass by with his eye closed, music in his mind and nicotine in his veins.

Infatuation, that's child's play. I think I'd know if I were falling.

"Captain? Captain Bernadette?"

His eye lazily opened and there she was. "Hey there, Seras." A light, guilty flush came over his face.

The young vampire's hair was wet, like it had been the majority of the evening but she didn't look like a cat in the rain, more like a woman fresh from a shower. He pretended to look away at his guitar to put it down. Instead as his gaze dropped, he looked her over in her pajamas. A part of him was disappointed to find that it wasn't the baby doll negligee he imagined, instead it was a simple cotton gown that fell past her knees. Another part of him thought it was fitting for her.

With guitar in its case, he scooted aside for her to sit down. "What can I do for you?"

She looked at the spot he made for her then at him. "N-nothing. I just heard music and I wanted to see what it was."

"Oh. Sorry. I didn't know I was playing loudly."

"No, no. It wasn't loud at all. Only I could probably hear it. It's refreshing actually," she said with a little laugh. "Between Walter and my Master's I don't hear anything more modern then swing."

He too laughed and picked up the guitar. "Any requests? A musician loves a captive audience." Please, just stay a while. I want to know that you are ok.

Seras slowly sat beside him. She could smell the soap he used to clean away the mud. "I can't think of any. What was that you were playing?"

As he looked at her, the melody resurfaced. "This one? You really don't know? Stairway to Heaven, it's not exactly modern, but a classic in its own right."

She watched his callous fingertips work through the chords. "Moonlight as a rock star, Pip?"

"If there is a promise of special backstage performances by groupies, I'm there. To rock and roll aaaall night and party everyday, that's a life to lead." A snort of disgust took away his smile as she moved to stand. "Hey, come on you know I'm playing, girl. Lighten up and have a seat."

Seras did continue to sit but not as close as before. Pip licked his lips and tapped cigarette ashes into an empty scotch tumbler on the nightstand, before continuing to play. He noticed she was barefooted where he, on the other had, had on his wool socks as well as a pair of slippers. "You ever get cold?"

"Hm?"

"You're walking around like its summertime or something."

"So far only water makes me cold." She gave him a small smile as she tucked her feet beneath her.

"How about heat?"

"Um. I haven't been a vampire long enough to tell. I can feel things that are hot and cold but I don't know if I can get hot," she ended with a shrug.

Pip nodded and continued to strum his way through the song. He hoped she didn't play an instrument because this particular tune was out of practice, but he pressed on. The conversation died down and the guitar was the only sound. She just sat there and listened, eyes half closed with her cheek rested against her hand. He wished he knew all the words to sing but kept playing for all he was worth.

Bernadette should have been satisfied in this moment of peace between he and Victoria, a peace without ego, machismo or trying to prove one thing or another. But he wasn't. The echo of Alucard's words wouldn't leave Pip. I'm allowing you to be her captain, he had said. What did that mean? That he was a nuisance to be tolerated like her?

"Captain?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm-I'm very sorry about what happened... in the ditch," her words faltered, as simple as they were.

"I told you before, don't worry about it. You've got a problem to deal with. It got under control today."

"But Pip, I could have-" Seras shook her head and looked away.

He stopped playing and set the guitar up against the wall. "You didn't. I'm glad that you got like that tonight."

"What?"

"I'm glad it happened. I now know about it." She looked down at the floor. "I'm guessing by your shame, you weren't going to tell me that intense situations with ghouls get to you. You're looking at it the wrong way. I know how I can help you now. Don't think for a second that this is a problem that will just go away."

She nodded, still avoiding eye contact.

"I think problem is the wrong word for it, Victoria. You're a vampire. That's your weapon. You don't NEED a gun in the end. It's a learning process that I'm sure you're barely scratching the surface on. Just keep trying to master it." Pip fell silent, feeling awkward in giving her a pep talk out of the blue, but it felt right. And another poor choice of words on his part. He was going to ban the word master from his vocabulary around Seras, except it was a little late for that now. It was his turn to avert his gaze as he crushed the cigarette in the tumbler. "Just don't you think you are alone, Seras."

"Thank you, Captain," she said at last, a smile on her face, despite the increasing watery quality of her eyes. "I won't let you down."

How many times did she need someone to say that to her? "You're welcome."

"I should go," Seras yawned and stretched. Pip watched her chest rise with her arms over her head. "We've got drills tomorrow."

He swallowed and made damn sure that she didn't catch his gaze, or else this entire conversation's meaning would be lost. "Bonne nuit," the words rolled from his tongue as he too yawned and stretched.

"Bon newie?"

Pip smiled and shook his head, "Good night."