Author: theshinykitty
Warning: Inanimate object luvin'
Disclaimer: I don't own Beauty and the Beast... (Thank God...)

A lovely Lumiere/Cogsworth yoai story for the entire family.

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When a Candle Loves a Clock

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(Candle POV)

Oh, Cogsworth, since the first time I saw your clock-ified form, it was love at first sight.

Your gears, your gadgets, your... oh... PENDULUM!

It made my flames tingle.

Whoever knew inanimate objects that are alive could be so... beautiful.

Everyday was spent staring at the time, your face. I was enchanted.

I was so close to telling you that I loved you and wanted those clock hands all to myself, when that Mrs. Potts bitch ruined it all!

She thinks she can use that spout and handle to attract all the knives and spoons and pans, but alas, her ceramic charm has seared even you, Cogsworth...

What would Mr. Potts think! What about your children, you thieving teapot! Your oh-so-many children! Have you even given thought to Chip and his crippling birth defect!

You sick, vile, teapot!

And, so, as I sit here in this cupboard, all my hopes and dreams smashed around me as you go off to the cabinet, to make sweet, sweet, love to that round mass of ceramic, I hold this jar of water close to me.

Yes, my death shall take place here in this dusty cupboard, alone and unfeeling. And in the morning, when they find my snuffed, lifeless metal form, you shall know, that I... loved you.

Goodbye.

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If there ever was a time to say WTF, now would be the time.

I'm so sorry, I just had to write this... (Hides in closet as angry mothers charge at me)

Let me say, for the record, that the only good thing that came out of this movie was Beasts' cameo in Kingdom Hearts. That homosexual midget who followed Gaston around was pretty funny, though...

Read? Review?