A/N: Hello this is the alternate ending that I am making for you reviewers who didn't want Ningy the Ninny here to die.

Gan Ning: Ra-chan . . . I'm going to kill you.

Ra-chan: YES! IM SO EVIL! MUHAHAHAHAA!!! Ok sorry bit of an episode. This is going to be a bit of a comedy and a parody, so I hope everyone likes it.

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Let's All Kill Sun Ce Now

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"DYSENTERY! Are you sure its not just something I ate?" I asked desperately.

"Hmm . . . wait. SUN CE! WHAT DID YOU DO NOW YOU LOUSY EXCUSE FOR THE FIRSTBORN OF THE EMPORER SUN JIAN!" Zhou Yu screamed.

Sun Ce came in from around the doorway laughing so hard he was crying.

"Zhou Yu, we need to examine that head of yours! Have you forgotten our dear Gan Ning's drinking habits? Or old habits you might say. I have two words for you: Rum and laxatives!" he roared with laughter.

0.0 -.-

"SUN CE WE'RE GOING TO KILL YOU!" Zhou Yu and I both bellowed as we grabbed for the reckless man's throat.

Sun Ce jumped back just in time before I got my mitts around his jugular. Dysentary! My foot!

"Sun Ce you lil -" I started before Sun Ce covered my face with one of his hands.

"Gan Ning, keep that ex-pirate tongue of yours in your mouth. No swearing in front of women!" he said and did a mock noble pose.

"Let me die . . . please . . . let it end," Zhou Yu was mumbling to himself.

"Zhou Yu! I'm hurt!" Sun Ce pouted.

"Dysentary is not a joke, Sun Ce"

"So? It was funny! You should have seen the looks on your faces! CLASSIC!"

"Bumble mumble mubble," I tried to talk through Sun Ce's big hand.

"Yes, I'm sure thinking that he was going to die was so funny for poor Gan Ning."

Little did they both know, was that Sun Ce's hands are very large and strong. I couldn't quite breath at the moment as my mouth and nose was being tightly closed over.

"MUMBLE BUMBLE MUMBLE!" I tried again, but they keep going at it.

"Oh Gan Ning is a good sport, he's an ex-pirate! He's used to practical jokes!"

"That may be so, but there is a fine line, concerning practical jokes, between what is funny . . . and what is not."

"Sun Ce . . . Zhou Yu . . . no matter how good a sport Gan Ning is, he's not going to be very forgiving in a couple of minutes. He can't breathe."

Thankfully my buddy Lu Meng came in and saved me. Sun Ce quickly removed his hand . . . and ran. He ran very fast. I chased him. I had my sword. Lu Meng is a faster runner than I am. I caught Sun Ce. I was held back. I don't like Sun Ce. Lu Meng pulled his back holding me back. I'm very scary when I am drunk, have my sword within my grasp, and am extremely ANGRY!

"Gan Ning, I think we need to go over something. Sun Ce is on our side. We cannot kill him. We would LIKE to kill him. But that is a no-no. A BIG NO-NO!" Lu Meng lectured at me.

"Yeah I guess," I replied.

"Good Ningy."

"What did you call me?!"

((Next day, evening time, after dinner))

I had been called to Sun Quan's study area. There was some big meeting about Shu and other stuff that I won't be listening to. I was walking down the hall and keeping an eye out for that baka, Sun Ce. Oh, he is going to get it! I reached Sun Quan's study and entered to see Zhuge Liang, Lu Xun, Zhou Yu, Sun Quan, and a crying Sun Shang Xiang. Sun Quan was trying to console his sister, who was yelling at him, and Zhuge Liang was sitting in a chair behind a huge desk going over some papers. The other two strategists were standing along the opposite wall. Zhuge Liang acknowledged my presence, as did Lu Xun and Zhou Yu. The other two were completely oblivious so I went to stand by Lu Xun and ask what the heck I was doing here.

"Lu Xun, may I ask what is going on? Also way is the council from Shu here?" I asked him when I reached him.

"Well Gan Ning . . . it was an idea of Sun Quan's. He told his father not to become enemies with Shu, after changing his own mind of course. The only way to do so, besides a treaty, was to have a marriage arrangement," he replied.

"Oh! Let me guess . . . Shang Xiang is getting married to Wei Yan?" I asked with a laugh.

"Heh, no not that bad, Liu Bei himself. But you know Shang Xiang, such a tomboy. Doesn't want to get married," he explained.

Our attention was turned as Shang Xiang threw a golden plate off the self behind her at Sun Quan and screamed at him.

"YOU SORRY EXCUSE FOR A BROTHER! LIU BEI? MARRYING ME OFF LIKE SOME KIND OF ANIMAL! DO I LOOK LIKE A COW TO YOU?" she demanded with rage.

"Sister, please! It was the only way!" he said blocking the plate, "No, I don't think of you as livestock. Please understand! I promise you won't be unhappy! Gan Ning is going with you!"

"I am?" I piped in.

Both siblings turned to look at me with a startled expression as they noticed my presence. Sun Quan searched for words, only coming out in a stammer. Finally, Zhou Yu said something for him.

"Gan Ning, what his lordship means to say is that your also getting married. A double arranged marriage," he explained.

"Wait? I'm not getting married to Liu Bei!" I started.

"No you idiot! Your also going to marry someone from Shu, but his lordship was wrong in his words. Your future wife is to come from Shu as well. Fair, I think," Zhou Yu explained yet again.

"Okay . . . just out of curiosity, and out of my own right, who am I getting married too?" I asked turning to Zhuge Liang.

"Diao Wan, a new officer of mine. I just hope she doesn't mind being moved around so quickly. There wasn't anymore single women at the moment, and she seemed like the perfect wife for you," he said with a smile.

The whole room snickered with laughter . . . but I didn't hear. The hallelujah chorus was singing in my ears. I could hear it now:

HAAAALLELUJAH! HAAAAALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH!

I was snapped out of my daydream by a slap to the cheek.

"I DO!" I yelled out in my happiness.

They all laughed again.

"Gan Ning, you're not at the wedding yet," Shang Xiang teased with a laugh.

"Sorry guys, I just lost it a little bit there. What was in that wine at dinner, eh?" I tried to cover up.

((Back with Diao, her POV))

I was with Jiang Wei and Zhao Yun playing cards. Yes, we were gambling, and I was winning extremely. The game was Poker, my specialty.

"I guess luck is not with us tonight, my friend Wei," sighed Zhao Yun.

"Yes, but we are playing against and ex-pirate," Jiang Wei reminded him.

I laughed. It was true. I took the cards for my deal and began shuffling. Several people began to crowd around and watched. I smirked, time to put these two to shame. The deck we were using used to belong to one of the pirates on my old ship. Folds in the corners marked the cards. I could easily tell what the value of each card was. This is going to be fun.

"Let's see if Lady Luck favors you this round, boys," I taunted.

They looked at their cards, an immediately lost their poker faces. You could of heard a pin drop. Jiang Wei's eyes were huge in shock. While, Zhao Yun started to bite his nails.

"Let's see . . . I'll open with five," I said and threw in a chip.

"Fold," said Jiang Wei.

"Fold," Zhao Yun repeated.

I laughed. This was going to be enjoyable. Very enjoyable. Thank you, Nuri. These cards came in handy. Just then, a messenger came over and handed me a piece of parchment. I took it and read it.

Lady Diao,

You have been arranged to marry an officer of Wu. Lady Sun is to marry Liu Bei and join Shu. In return, you are to go to Wu. Your husband is to be Gan Ning.

Sincerely,

Zhuge Liang

P.S. The parchment attacked is your marriage arrangement. It is already signed and approved. Congratulations, you're married.

Dreams do come true. Wow . . . that's not something you hear everyday. I can't believe I'm married to Gan Ning. Happy, happy, joy, joy . . .

((AN: Some marriages were done by written agreements instead of like a ceremony. Sun Shang Xiang's first marriage was done like this, but he died so that's when Liu Bei stepped in. And I'm droning on and on. I'll be quiet sorry.))

"What you got there, Wan" asked Zhao Yun.

"Nothing, just something about my marriage arrangement," I answered.

"Let me see!" he pleaded before snatching it out of my hand, "Why am I not surprised. It was so meant to be."

He showed it around and the room burst out in laughter. Some girls in the corner came over and read it as well.

"Whoa, Lady Diao. Gan Ning? Lucky!" one giggled, "I always thought he'd be a bachelor for life."

"You obviously don't know Gan Ning very well. He's been after Wan here since he set eyes on her," teased Jiang Wei making a mock sappy face.

"Hush you!" I scolded and lightly punched him on the shoulder.

They all laughed and I wrote a message to Zhuge Liang I would pack my things. I handed the note to the waiting messenger and he ran off to deliver. As he left I got up.

"Where ya going? We're not finished with out game," Jiang Wei demanded.

"I'm going to go pack. Can't go to Wu empty-handed," I answered.

Him and Zhao Yun both nodded and handed me my deck of cards before I left.

"Goodbye, Wan. It's going to be boring around here without you," they all called behind me.

((Two days later, Diao Wan's arrival at Wu))

I rode up to Jiang Ye's front gate. It was raining, and I was soaked through and through. My hair was plastered to my head and the rain pinged off my armor. Just what I wanted to look like today. I laughed and showed my pass and the guards let me through. I had traveled alone and didn't carry many possessions. I entered the palace grounds and passed Shang Xiang on her way to Shu. She smiled and waved. I waved and called out to her.

"Watch out for Jiang Wei and Zhao Yun. They have a habit of eaves dropping," I yelled with a laugh.

"I'll be sure to!" she laughed.

I came to the entrance and saw Gan Ning waiting for me. He was grinning from ear-to-ear. He reached up and lifted me off the back of my horse. Someone took the reigns and held the gelding.

"Gan Ning, you can put me down now," I said.

"Do I have too?" he asked teasingly.

"Please," I answered.

"Ok," he said letting me down.

He smiled and leaned down to kiss me. I've never been so happy.

"Oh save it for the honeymoon and spare us of the disgust!"

We pulled away to see Sun Ce walking up to us. Gan Ning smirked and walked towards him, fingering his sword.

"Sun Ce . . . I still haven't forgotten that little prank you pulled," he said tauntingly.

Sun Ce froze and his eyes widened. He ten turned around and ran as fast as he could. Gan Ning ran after him sword in hand.

"HAVE MERCY, XINGBA! IT WAS ONLY A LITTLE JOKE! MERCY! NO NOT THE SWORD! ANYTHING BUT THAT! NO! THE CINDER BLOCK HURTS MORE! I LIKE THE SWORD! NOOOO!"

The End

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AN: Hehe hope you like it. You should read the other chapter. This is the end of the story, I'll be making a new one soon. Game show parody! Fun, fun, fun! Fast update for me eh? Lol, ok ill go now and start the new story. Ideas or suggestions please email me.