She had never really thought about suicide. It was just a threat she told her mom when she didn't want to clean her room, or do something else her mother told her to.
It wasn't as if she cared if she made her mother cry, but then again it wasn't as if she felt her mother cared. Sure she could hear the tears, but she figured it was just her mother crying from being in pain again.
With her back problems, crying was something that came often and natural to her mother.
She sat there, in the chair. Dead inside. And she stared at the knives sitting on the table, all different sizes, but all pretty well brand new, they weren't even a few years old, and hopefully sharp.
'What am I thinking… I would never commit suicide, that's not me.'
'So what?' The other voice said. 'It's not as if you have something to live for…'
'But my mom…'
'Moms are supposed to care. It's really only fake care.'
'Jii-Chan…'
'Is dying. He's already going blind Kagome, his body is shutting itself down.'
'Souta…'
'Is at a friend's house, Kagome he's never there for you. He's out with his friends.'
'InuYasha…'
'Is too head over heels in love with that bitch Kikyou to notice that you love him.'
'Sango…'
'Is grieving over losing Kohaku, with Miroku right there beside her, to show how much he loves her.'
'…'
'None of them are there for you Kagome. It's all fake, and sickly sweet shit that has obviously convinced you into thinking they care.'
'I'm going insane, voices are talking to me…'
'You already were insane Kagome, why else would you listen to me?'
'I'm sick of you lying to me.'
'But it's the truth.'
'Why is it the truth?'
'Because no one on earth could care about a piece of shit like you.'
'Is that really all I am?'
'Yes.'
"I don't mean anything anymore, I'm nothing, nothing to no one. I mean nothing to anyone. I'm nothing, nothing. I know how to make everyone happy. Why don't I just die…"
Suicide is not an option she told herself. But those knives looked tempting. Killing herself looked tempting. It wasn't as if anyone cared. It wasn't as if anyone would notice. They would come to her Funeral party to celebrate her death.
She pulled out a pad of paper, the special pad her mom had gotten her. At the top of the paper, it said With Love, Kagome.
Kagome smiled. "This is the perfect pad of paper to write this upon."
At the top, in very neat printing she wrote, 'My Will'
"Hey InuYasha?"
"Yeah Kikyou?"
"You love Kagome more don't you…"
"…"
"You don't need to lie InuYasha, if you say yes, I won't stop being there for you, being your friend."
"Yes, I do."
"Then tell her you love her."
"Why?"
"Because she probably cares about you just as much as you care about her."
"You're telling me to tell Kagome I love her?"
"Yes. Because when you do it might be too late."
Kikyou hadn't realized it already was too late.
Kagome finished with the last letter, slamming her hand down to make a period at the end of the sentence.
She picked the biggest, largest knife of the set, and carefully slid it out.
She picked the paper up leaving the pad on the kitchen table.
She slowly ascended the stairs, taking each step one at a time, tears coming out as she realized, no one cared, no one needed her, no one liked her, no one loved her.
She reached the top, the tears overflowing her eyes, and cascading like waterfalls down her cheeks.
She carefully pulled a pushpin out of the case and tacked the paper with My Will on it to the board.
"Goodbye…"
She raised the knife to her heart and slid it in. She sunk to the floor eyes hollow and lifeless.
"Good bye…
Everyone was there for the funeral. From Shippo, her cousin, to Souta, to InuYasha.
InuYasha however looked as if he had died.
The same question was on everyone's mind. 'Why did Kagome commit suicide? It wasn't as if she wasn't happy, everyone loved her…'
Or so everyone thought. Words like that Kagome would have spit on.
Once the sermon was up, everyone came up and said a few good words about Kagome.
But InuYasha stayed in his seat, eyes still blank and hollow.
Kikyo didn't bother, she knew InuYasha had loved Kagome.
And she had told him to tell her he loved her before it was too late.
She remembered standing at the foot of the stairs and hearing him scream her name.
"KAGOME!"
She'd run upstairs but it was much too late.
And she knew why InuYasha was so blank and dead.
Her suicide was a lot harder on him than anyone else.
Kagome's mother was last. "I found this in Kagome's room. I thought perhaps I should read it now, to everyone. Since we all care about Kagome."
"With Love, Kagome. My Will. I wanted to answer the question you all probably have on your mind. Why did sweet old Kagome who never thought about suicide kill herself? I thought about it. I told my mom I'd kill myself so she's leave me alone sometimes. Before I died I asked myself what I had to live for. I shot myself down at every good thing to live for. I really don't have much to live for, I realized. I hope you all live a good long life and are very happy, if anything I hope you'll all live for me since you have so much to live for, and I'm sorry I didn't live to see InuYasha and Kikyou marry, or see Sango and Miroku marry, too. I wrote this to let you all know how sorry I am, but know that I am happy and I have no worries, and I wish you all could know how wonderful it is."
Kagome's mother, swallowed the tears as she read the last two lines. "And I would like to leave something, since this is of course a will. To InuYasha Taishou, I leave my undying love for him."
InuYasha stood up from his seat.
"InuYasha?" Mrs. Higurashi asked.
"I'm going to read my own will while we're here. I hope Sango and Miroku get married too. And I'm sorry you all had to put up with me. Goodbye."
InuYasha was found dead a week later. They buried him with Kagome.
Everyone went on with life and it was as if they'd never been.
But somewhere up in Heaven InuYasha and Kagome met, everyone figured they did. And they knew they were both together after so long of not telling each other of their love they were finally showing it.
Inu Kaiba: And to think I started this to keep myself from suicide. And it worked too. I was staring at those same knives wondering if I should. And then I cried for a really long time, wondering how I could think such a thing. I put a few lines of Three Days Grace songs in here but it's not really a songfic. I just think their music is something you can relate too. I'm glad I don't feel like suicide now. I really don't know what came over me. ;; Anyways you probably aren't reading this so I'll stop now. Please read and review since I worked so hard.