EVERY SM LOVESTORY

CHAPTER SEVEN B: The Rest

Usagi sighed. "Nothing for it. Guys!" She said loudly. "Think of something sad!"

"Something sad…" mused Minako.

"That dead person on the floor?" said a half-brainwashed Nigel.

"No, no, much sadder."

Rei concentrated. "Uhh… Usagi being queen of the planet. Uh… puppies falling down. Puppies being eaten by kittens."

Usagi's eyes began to water.

"Puppies being mistreated by small children. Us never getting out of high school and working at the arcade forever. Us becoming middle-aged and fat."

"Nooooooo!" At that last remark, Usagi cried out. A lone teardrop fell from her face and rose in the air, spinning and shining and emitting and otherworldly light.

Before the spectators' awestruck eyes, the tear transformed into…

"a peanut?"

"Try a little harder, Usagi-chan!" encouraged Ami.

She concentrated. The next tear transformed into a magical silver crystal. Usagi transformed into a white fluffy dress. She crouched next to Makoto's body and cried, "Mooon….healing…WAKE UP MAKO-CHAN! I REFUSE TO DO THIS EVER AGAIN!"

Makoto's eyes fluttered and she rose from the ground to meet the smiling face of her friend.

"This time," Usagi told her. "Find a guy you're going to keep."

The tall girl turned over and locked eyes with Nigel, who happened to be staring her way. "Hiya, handsome."

Mamoru, who had been shocked into silence, finally found his voice. "Usagi… does this mean that you are… you are…"

Usagi nodded her head wisely. "Yes," she said simply. "I am Sailor Moon."

Something inside Mamoru's chest clicked. It was nothispacemaker, though."Perhaps it is time for me to tell you…" he was suddenly encased in a blinding golden light.

"I am also Sailor Moon!"

The girls all froze in horror at the picture of Mamo-chan wearing a tiny blue skirt and a big blond wig.

Rei ralphed. Karl (aka Kevin aka Kunzite aka Malachite aka Betty) flicked back his silver hair and said in a sultry tone, "Hi there, gorgeous…"

"Ew!" cried everyone in unison.

At that moment a short blond-haired man stepped out of the back room. "Hey!" He said angrily. "Do you guys have a problem with crossdressers!"

"Cousin Haruka!" called out Usagi gaily.

'Cousin Haruka' strode purposefully over to Usagi and kissed her on the lips. "I've been meaning to tell you this for some time. I am actually a woman."

"T-That must mean, you're also not really my cousin, right?" the younger girl stammered.

Haruka grinned. "No, I am really your cousin."

"EW!"

She grinned again. "Bye, now, I'm going over to Michiru's."

Usagi blanched. "Cousin Michiru?"

"Don't think about it too hard, kid." Haruka left.

Usagi was shaking.

Andrew blinked. "Well, I'm…disturbed…" He blinked again. "On many levels… Good grief, Mamoru-kun, could you please put some pants on."

"Sorry!" Mamoru gulped. "I must be really out of it today. What I meant to say is… I'm really… Tuxedo Mask! My poetry was never good enough to be published, so I switched to the hero biz." He spun around a bit and was suddenly wearing a dashing three piece suit.

Without warning, Andrew took a few steps forward begin to spin around too. "You're not the only ones with secrets! I am Tuxedo Milkshake! Saving the world from excessive dieting!" He was wrapped in cherry colored light, and when the brilliance faded he was wearing exactly what he had been wearing before. Only with a bow tie.

(AN: it's a magical bow tie).

"oooo," said the girls. Rei let out a low whistle. "I can barely recognize him!" she cried.

"I knew those milkshakes were too tasty to be normal," Usagi declared.

Seconds later, a girl with purple hair and glasses popped out from behind a video game and threw table salt and little bits of glitter into the air. "And I, Seisaku Johnson, am Usagi's long lost cousin and Sailor Earth!"

A boy with spikey blond hair appeared behind her. And I am your twin brother, Johnny Tsukino, also known as…" he transformed in a flurry of flower petals and arcade napkins… "Sailor Open Star Cluster NGC 2467!"

Usagi narrowed her eyes. "Hey now, I've seen the future, past, and alternate present like a gazillion times, and I so do not have a twin brother!"

Tears came to the blond boy's eyes. "Why does no one love me?" he complained.

Sailor Earth knelt beside him. "I have always loved you." She said softly.

He turned to her. "Who are you again?"

With a rush of displaced space, Sailor Pluto appeared before them, holding a really big key.

"I have seen your destiny," she told the two youngsters solemnly. "And you will go play ski-ball together, over there somewhere."

"Okay!" They said, and they linked hands and obediently left the scene.

"Thank you, Setsuna," Usagi said gratefully. As the Soldier of Time smiled and disappeared, she began to feel very awkward.

The various superheroes milled about the arcade, unsure what exactly to do next.

"Quick! I think I'm about to do something impulsive!" Mamoru cried. Everyone looked terrified. "Don't worry, the world isn't ending!"

"It will soon," said Setsuna mysteriously.

Mamoru jumped. "Gyahh! Stop appearing out of nowhere! Go away!"

A lone tear trickled down the green-haired woman's face. It didn't transform into anything. "Fine!" she said, and vanished. "I want a hug."

Mamoru turned back to Usagi. "Andrew, put on some music." His eyes narrowed. "Hey, wasn't your name 'Motoki' in the last chapter? Or the one before?"

The sandy-haired boy shrugged. "I dunno." He popped a tape into the stereo. Immediately, the haunting tune of a familiar song wafted out of the speakers. Mamoru turned to his friend, aghast. "This? Are you serious?"

Motoki/Andrew shrugged again. "Sorry, it's all I've got. Some kid left it in a booth the other day."

The ebony haired man took Usagi's arms and led her to the smooth hardwood center of the arcade. He took her hand.

"Darling, we seem to be dressed for the occasion... may I have this dance?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

In perfect symmetry, they began to dance.

"Oh!" Usagi said. 'this feels so familiar…'

"You know, for a klutz," Mamoru mused, "you're pretty good at this…"

She flushed. "I'm usually not this coordinated. It's just that I'm with you…" she looked up at him. Suddenly nervous, she began to babble, "but I've forgotten how hard it is, especially the flapping part."

Strains of the time-old song hovered romantically over their heads:

"If you wanna be a chicken

Just flap your wings

And go like this!

Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

If you wanna be a chicken

Just flap your wings

And go like this!

Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!"

Mamoru and Usagi chickendanced together in perfect harmony, as though they had been destined for it their whole lives.

"Mamoru…I think I have to tell you…"

"Usagi…I want to let you know…"

"I hate you." They both said together.

"That really means we love each other, right?" said Usagi, clapping her hands to the beat of the music.

Mamoru thought hard. "I don't know. There are still aspects of your personality that I very much dislike."

"Same here," said Usagi. "But there's no one else I'd rather hate."

They kissed briefly, and smiled.

"So… can we just keep dancing?"

"Until forever, my love."

They flapped their wings, and went like this:

CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP!

"Ow, my foot!"

THE END.

I'll add 'thank yous' in the morning. G'nite everyone, it's been a trip, I hope you had a good time!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own the Chickendance, or a puppy.