Author's Note: This story was written in the utmost sincerity. I swear it. Any and all constructive criticism is welcome.

Developing Problems
By: youdontneedtoknow

Chapter 1: Developing Problems

Alanna pulled off her tunic and breeches, eager to cleanse her dirt-filled pores. She tossed the muddy clothes onto the floor and slipped into the pristine water of the tub. Thankfully, she realized, the tub must have been filled right before her arrival, for the water's usual lukewarm temperature seemed to be a thing of the past.

For the first time in what felt like ages, she soaked in the tub, though she felt guilty pangs when thinking about how she could better use this time for her studies, or to practice her swordsmanship. She comforted herself with the thought that she had deserved this reward, as being pushed in the mud by a grinning Gary definitely gave her the right to a small consolation prize.

As the water grew cold, she pulled herself out of the tub and groaned inwardly at the change in temperature. She stepped out of the tub onto the towel she was using to sop up the water, then onto the castle floor. She shuddered at the touch of the cold stone floor on her bare feet, but still made it across the room to her dresser, where her towel lay. She caught a look at herself in the mirror and gasped.

Her breasts had definitely grown since the last time she had seen herself bare. No longer minor swellings, they hung from her body like overly ripe fruits. Still shocked, she wrapped her towel around her body, careful to cover her monstrosities.

She opened the top drawer of her dresser, fumbling to find her linen breast-bandages with one hand while the other stubbornly held up her towel to maximize the coverage it gave. She clasped her hand over a long bandage, and pulled it from her dresser.

Ashamed, she turned her back to the mirror, not wanting to see herself. She dropped the towel and tied the cloth bindings around her chest, securing them tightly. She turned to look at herself in the mirror and wailed.

Why is this happening! she wanted to shriek. Why can't they look any smaller! She felt like crying as she pulled on the rest of her clothes, making a careful effort to rumple the front of them as much as possible.

A knock at the door nearly made her heart stop. She didn't want any of her friends to get anywhere near her right now. "Hey, Alan? I know you're in there. Come out for a minute, please, if you're decent yet." Jon's voice echoed in her room, making her wince. Though Jonathan did not know her true sex, her knightmaster was aware of her need for privacy.

"I'm decent," she called. She trudged over to the door, shuddering again at her reflection in the mirror. She unhitched the latch at the top that she always was sure to lock when taking her baths. She pulled open the door, revealing not just Jon, but Jon and Gary.

She felt like shutting the door again, but prayed to the goddess that neither Gary nor Jon would have any urge to look carefully at her chest area.

"Gary has something to say to you," Jonathan grinned, prodding Gary in the back. He smiled at Alanna, continuing, "Especially after I'd told him yours clothes will probably need to be replaced." He smirked at her. "I'll leave you two to sort it out," he said, smiling as he turned around.

Gary grinned as Jon walked away. "Alan, I'm sorry I pushed you in the mud."

Alanna scowled at him, careful to cover her chest with her arms by folding them in a cross gesture. "Oh, I'm sure," she said, voice dripping in sarcasm.

Gary's smile widened. "Well, maybe you're right. Those clothes of yours needed to be replaced soon anyway."

"Do tell," Alanna said, raising her eyebrows at him.

"They're much too big for you. Or rather, you're much too small for them," he said, grin now stretching across his entire face.

Alanna, forgetting her resolution to forever crossing her arms over her chest, smacked him straight on the mouth. That wiped the smile right off of Gary's face, leaving behind a pale pink mark in its stead. "Okay, I deserved that," he muttered, rubbing the spot where she had hit him.

"Yes, you did." Alanna gave him a smug smile. "You must have forgotten that I've actually learned how to hit people properly."

Gary's smile returned as he gave her a playful punch on the chest. "Though I don't know, Alan. You might fit into them if you let the rest of your body get as flabby as your chest."

The smile fell from Alanna's face, and she quickly rearranged her arms back over her chest. "Leave me alone!" she squealed, her voice high and shrill. "I'm in better shape than you'll ever be!"

Gary gave her a confused half-smile and shook his head. "I'm only joking, Alan." He turned, and took a few strides down the hall. He swiveled his head back to her, and said, "So I'll see you at dinner, right?"

Alanna frowned. "I don't know. I don't feel that great. Perhaps it would be better if I took dinner in my rooms." Her voice, still higher than usual, echoed through the hall.

Gary shrugged. "Very well. I'll tell a servant or someone to bring you up something to eat." He continued his stroll down the hall and began to whistle a tune that Alanna recognized as an annoyingly popular court ballad about a knight and his horse.

"No!" she nearly shouted.

Gary stopped whistling mid song, snapping his head back around at Alanna. Blushing furiously, she said, "I mean, I'll go get something myself later. Don't trouble yourself."

Gary sighed. "Fine then, Alan. I do hope you'll be feeling well by tomorrow." He turned back around and continued his way through the corridor, still whistling the same inane tune.

Alanna ducked back inside her rooms, and bolted the door as tightly as she could.

What's happening to me?