Again my apologizes for the delay, but I promise not do it again. Have a nice day all and thanks so much for your post.
Jag.
"Mom?" Helena opened her eyes. She sat up in the bed and looked around. She wasn't in her home. Her mom wasn't back yet. She took Jacques by his neck and hugged him. Her mom was still angry. She hadn't called her in 2 days, and maybe she would spank her when she arrived.
Taking Jacques, she moved off the bed and walked toward the door.
Trying to sleep had been difficult, thinking of her friend. She had her gaze fixed on the wall. Restless, waiting. She just had left Helena sleeping in the other room and she was lying on the bed. She liked to be part of the action, waiting wasn't her favorite sport. But she had to.
She felt a light weight on the mattress. Helena. An arm wrapped around her waist and she felt the girl's head resting on her side.
"What are you doing here?" Barbara asked softly.
"I can't sleep."
"You must sleep, it's late." The red head turned her head to look down at her.
"You are not sleeping either." Helena moved, trying to find a comfortable position.
Barbara jumped slightly "That's my bone, careful." Barbara felt something tickling her back. She raised a brow. "Tell Jacques to move his tie."
Helena moved back and put Jacques' tie to a side before falling against Barbara again. The redhead grunted and raised her head. "Careful, you are not exactly 'light'. Have you ever considered letting Jacques sleep alone?"
"He doesn't like the dark."
"He is a cat, cats love the night."
"He likes the night, but not the dark."
"What's the difference?" The crime fighter moved her head to the pillow.
Helena snuggled against her, hugging her cat. "Ask him."
The stuffed cat's fake hair itched the redhead, she moved her hand to scratch her back. "Jacques needs a bath."
"He doesn't like water."
"Just because he's a cat doesn't mean he has to be a dirty cat."
"He's not a dirty cat, he washes himself with his tongue."
Barbara raised herself and rested her weight on her elbow. "That is disgusting."
"Why? He's a clean cat." Blue eyes fixed on green.
"Helena, no decent person cleans them self with their tongue."
"He's not person, he's a cat."
"Okay, okay."
A deep silence suddenly permeated the room. The redhead closed her eyes and tried to sleep a bit. She needed to do it.
"I'm thisty." Helena whispered, breaking the silence.
Barbara didn't respond and after a few seconds Helena said again: "I'm thisty." Green eyes rolled back. Maybe the decision not to be a mother wasn't such crazy idea after all.
"I'm thirsty."
"There is water on my night table. Take it."
The kid crawled over the redhead.
"Wait, you are heavy." The redhead grunted when the girl's knee buried in her thigh. It had hurt. "Helena!" Being poked and kneed by a kid wasn't pleasant.
"I'm thisty."
"Yes, I know, I know, but be careful." The redhead sat up..
"No, Barbara!" the brunette shouted suddenly.
Barbara jumped in her place and looked around. "No what?"
Helena crawled again over Barbara, this time burying her elbow in her waist.
"Dammit," the redhead growled.
"You are sitting on Jacques!" Helena protested, moving her hands around Barbara, looking for her cat.
"Helena, be quiet!" Barbara moved and the girl rolled over the mattress, giggling, "Have you tried sleeping without your cat?"
"No, Jacques is mine, mine, mine."
"I know, I know, I know, but he's a pain in the ass," the redhead said.
"He's not!" Helena kneeled on the mattress.
"He is."
"He's not!" The brunette jumped on the redhead, who fell back laughing, and began to tickle her.
"Stop that, Helena!" Barbara said, smiling and grabbing her hands.
"Jacques is not a pain in the ass!" The girl was agile and fast and it was hard for Barbara to keep her quiet.
"Don't say that, Helena."
"He is not!" Helena giggled again.
It was nice to hear her giggling. Really nice; the last few days she had been so sad, and it was pleasant to see her smile. She hoped Selina would be okay, she was still too young, to let the shadow of the dark world steal her innocence.
She wondered if death would be so quiet, so cold. Being there was like being nowhere. She missed her Helena, she wanted to have the opportunity to see her once more. To hug her and tell her how much she loved her. She was frozen, the world looked surreal, something far.
Maybe she was dead and she hadn't realized it yet. Maybe she was, and if she was dead, she was alone. Being dead didn't hurt her as much as knowing that she hadn't done anything to secure her child's future. Maybe she hadn't been a perfect woman, and she had committed a lot of mistakes, but it wasn't Helena's fault. She didn't have to pay for her mistakes.
She was just a kid.
Shit.
Just a little kid. She closed her eyes and cried. If faults would be forgiven with tears…
She felt strong arms taking her. Everything was blurred, shadows and sounds suddenly surrounded her. She couldn't feel anything, she couldn't understand, it was like being inside a twister. She had thought being dead would be more peaceful.
"Is she okay? Are you sure?" Helena took quick steps, following Barbara, who was holding her hand as they walked through the long corridors of Gotham Memorial Hospital. It was almost midday. Bruce had called her at daybreak. They had rescued Selina and trapped Mr. Freeze. But she had hypothermia, she had been exposed to low temperatures for a long time; she would recover, but it would take a bit of time. Barbara tried to not scare the little girl; she knew the amazing healing abilities of Selina, but knew it would take a bit of time. She waited until Bruce had told her that the blonde was getting better to tell Helena that her mom had fallen sick and was at the hospital.
The pain in the girl's face when she told her that her mother was at the hospital broke her heart. The fear of losing her mom was something that really scared her; the redhead tried to comfort her, explaining she was just a little sick and that she would be home in a couple days, but Helena didn't believe her words, she wanted to see her mom to be convinced she was okay.
"Why did she get sick?"
"I guess it was something she ate. She wanted to go home, but she thought it was better to come here first, and the doctor asked her to stay to keep an eye on her."
"What did she eat?"
"I don't know, Hel." The redhead pressed a button to call the elevator.
"She always eats vegetables and those things, she doesn't like burgers very much. I like burgers; but she says that's not healthy. I like French fries too, but she says they aren't healthy either. Once I felt sick because I ate a few pop tarts, but she didn't bring me here. Why does she have to be here?"
She was talking like a parrot again. That was a good sign. She pulled her inside the elevator when the door opened. "Because she is big, and when people are big, they feel more sick than children."
Helena frowned and glared at her. She was not stupid. "Barbara!"
"Shh, Helena, you talk so much and we are inside a hospital."
The brunette grumbled in a low voice.
"Don't worry, Helena, she is okay." The redhead said, patting her back.
The elevator stopped on the floor of the Intensive Care Unit.
A nurse suddenly blocked Barbara's way. "Sorry, madam, but we don't allow kids here."
"I want to see my mom." Helena looked up at her.
"Sorry."
"It's okay," Barbara smiled gently "I have the…."
Helena raised her head and sniffed, she recognized her immediately, it was her mom, she released Barbara's hand and ran down the corridor.
"Come back, kid!" the nurse shouted.
"It's okay, it's okay," Barbara took her arm, "Bruce Wayne gave his authorization, he's one of the founders of this hospital."
"She can't run in here, I..."
"Don't worry, I'll get her." The redhead gave her one of Bruce Wayne's cards, before following Helena. "Call him if you have any doubt."
The instinct of the little girl took her without hesitation to the place where her mother was. She opened a door that was almost in the middle of the place. She was shocked when she saw her lying on the bed. Alfred was inside the room seated on a couch and stood up immediately when he saw her, but she didn't pay attention to him, her eyes were focused on her mom. She was pale, she never had seen her so pale; feeling a knot in her throat, she went to her; she raised her hands to take her arm, but she hesitated.
Alfred noticed her uncertainty, it was as if the girl thought her mom was made of glass and she would break if she touched her. Gently, the man put his hand over Helena's shoulder.
"She is okay," he whispered "don't be afraid. The doctor just gave her something to sleep."
"Mom?" the little brunette mumbled, moving her fingers softly over her mother's arm, but she remained still. "I love you, Mom." She rubbed her cheek against her mother's arm.
Barbara stood up in the doorway, Alfred heard her and made a sign to not say a word, before walking to her.
"Is she okay?" the red head asked the butler in a low voice.
"Yes, she is doing very well. The doctor says she can leave in a couple of days."
Frightened, Helena looked at her mother; she rested her head on her stomach and crossed her arm around her waist, closing her eyes and inhaling deeply. She had missed her.
Dazed blue eyes opened, a light purr on her stomach awoke her. She smiled, recognizing her girl immediately. Her little Helena was there. She moved her hand and brushed soft hair.
The little brunette lifted her face, feeling the contact and turned her head. Loving blue eyes smiled at her. "Mom."
"Hi, sweetheart." It didn't matter that she was feeling numb, she managed to move her arms and envelop her child, pulling her gently near her face. Helena embraced her.
"I love you, Mom."
"I love you too, Hel."
Barbara and Alfred smiled and walked outside the room closing the door. They needed to be alone.
Bruce sent Alfred to pick up Selina and take her to her home two days later. He had rescued her before she could die in Mr. Freeze's frozen clutches. She was as happy as ever, to have the opportunity to look again at the blue sky and the trees. She felt very grateful with life for having the opportunity to be with her child again. Helena hadn't separated from her all day; she remained close to her. The beautiful woman watched the girl as she looked through the windows of the elegant limo.
"You and I have a conversation still pending." The older woman raised a brow.
Helena didn't answer and just snuggled against her.
"Yea, yea, I know your tricks, little monster," Selina laughed, "Can you tell me what happened with you? Why you have you been so rebellious lately?" The girl didn't say a word. Selina moved her back gently and cupped her jaw in her long fingers. She looked for her gaze but Helena avoided her eyes. "Look at me, please."
Hesitant blue eyes lifted slowly.
"I love you, Helena, why don't you want to tell me what's bothering you?"
"I'm okay,…"
"Is true that you were jealous?"
"I'm not jealous." The girl moved back.
"That's not what Barbara told me. Are you afraid that I'll stop loving you?" Ashamed the girl tried to lower her head, but Selina didn't allow her. "I love you, Helena, and the fact that I date a man doesn't mean that I stop loving you. You are my world, Kitten."
The girl was afraid to ask, she avoided her mother's look.
"Hel, please…"
"Jenny told me that when moms marry again they forget their kids and…"
Selina tried to not laugh, "I'm not marrying anyone. Who told you that?"
"You are dating him often, when a woman dates a man often, they usually marry."
"Jenny said that?" Amused, the graceful woman brushed her girl's hair. "Listen to me, you are my daughter; maybe you don't understand this now but, you were born of me, you are of me, you and I were a single person the moment you were a little thing this tiny inside me." She moved her thumb and forefinger millimeters apart, "I sang to you every night and many days when you and I were sitting at the window looking to the sky. I dreamed for the moment that I would have you in my arms and kiss and hug you, I waited for you for such a long time."
Helena looked at her with big eyes and her mouth half opened. "Really?"
Selina hugged her "You were tooo little to remember, but I could never forget the first time I held you in my arms." The blonde gazed warmly at her child and tried to make her daughter understand that the love of a mother was more powerful than any other love. "You are the most beautiful gift that life has given me, and I would never, never trade you for anything or anyone."
"But you were dating…"
"I said," Selina said, lovingly fixing her eyes on the brunette's, "that I love you more than anyone else, I have never lied to you, right?"
The girl nodded.
"I don't want you doing nasty things just because of that." The blonde rested her head against her, "Do you promise?"
"Yes, Mom."
"Do you promise to talk to me from now on, when something bothers you?"
"Yes, Mom."
Selina moved her head back and looked at her daughter. "Promise?"
"Yes."
"Now you must apologize."
Helena lowered her head and looked at her hands. "Why?"
"You know why… "
"Mom…"
"Helena…."
Taking a deep breath, Helena whispered. "I'm sorry mom."
"I didn't hear you." Selina knew she needed to push her to get her to open up.
The little brunette sighed and raised her voice a bit more, "I'm sorry mom."
"For what?"
Helena rolled her eyes. That was damn difficult, why was she asking her to do that?
"I'm waiting." Selina crossed her arms and glared at her.
The girl kept playing with her fingers. "I have been doing bad things, Mom, I'm sorry, I promise not to fight again and to do my homework everyday."
"Look at me."
Slowly and fearfully, Helena obeyed and found her mother's loving gaze.
"You are brave for saying that. I'm proud of you. It's not easy to accept and admit your mistakes. I love you, give me a biiiiiiiiiiig hug."
Helena giggled and let herself fall on Selina embracing her. The older woman smiled and kissed her. "I love you, Hel."
Looking in the rear view mirror, Alfred smiled as he watched them. They were a lovely family.
Three weeks had passed since the incident with Selina. Barbara had returned to her normal activities as a crime fighter at nights. After a rough night, she had arrived late to her home. She wanted to sleep late, but the insistent door bell made her wake up. Sleepily, she opened her door, just to find Selina.
"Selina?" she said, surprised.
"I see you had a rough night," the blonde smirked. "I knew you were here. I saw your car outside. I'm sorry for bothering you, but… this is important."
"Hi, come in." The redhead, still dizzy invited her to walk inside. "How do you feel?"
"Fine, thanks." The blonde smiled, noticing the big black rings under her eyes, "Seems as if you are not."
"Oh, you know, some minor burglars." The redhead closed the door, "How is Helena?"
"Being a pain in the ass as usual."
"That means she is okay."
"Yes." Selina smiled at her.
"Want something to drink?"
"No, thanks, I need to pick up Helena." She looked at a big yellow envelope that she had in her hands. "She is at her gym class. I have been thinking quite a bit since Freeze trapped me… I want to thank you for taking care of Helena and hiding from her what was happening, she would suffer so much if she had knew the truth."
"Don't worry about that, we are friends."
Selina remained silent a few seconds. Barbara felt something was wrong, but before she could speak, Selina handed her the yellow envelope.
"… I just, just came here to give this to you," she whispered.
Barbara frowned, taking the envelope in her hands. Selina put her hand over the redhead's to stop her from opening it and hesitated a few seconds "While I was there, alone, cold, my only thoughts were of Helena. I was so afraid to die and leave her alone."
"But you are okay now."
"Yes… but, you know my past always is my present." She rubbed her forehead with her fingers, she knew this wasn't easy and she didn't want to scare her friend, "Barbara, I don't know if I'll be alive tomorrow or next week or next month.."
"Selina…"
"I realized that if I die now, I'll leave her alone, an orphan… she will be alone… I was terrified thinking I would die and leave Helena without protection…"
The redhead didn't know what to say she just looked at the envelope in her hands. Was Selina suggesting that she…?
"Barbara, promise me one thing." Selina took her hand again, not feeling certain enough to look the young woman in her eyes, "Promise me that before saying "no," you will consider it very carefully."
The redhead blinked. She couldn't be serious.
"Freeze made me realize that none of us have a secure future. I don't know if I will live long enough to see Helena grow up and have a family. I could live many years or I could de dead tomorrow. You know it. That's the price for our life style. Helena loves you, she knows you; she trusts you. I love her so much, I don't want her to suddenly wake up one day and find she that is alone with nowhere to go and no one to care for her. I want to sleep everyday knowing that she never will be alone."
"But I…"
A delicate finger closed her lips. "Remember, promise not to say "no" unless you have really considered it.
Barbara raised her eyes and her eyes found a warm gaze, "You are the only person that I trust with her."
This was unexpected. She had a many reasons to say no in her head, that was a great responsibility. She just managed to ask, hesitantly, "…And her father, Selina?"
The blonde closed her eyes and shook her head, "I… I can't talk about him… not yet… please understand me… you know, I would never do anything to hurt Helena and, I can't say more now, maybe some day. But trust me," blue eyes fixed on green, "This doesn't mean I don't trust you but… I can't tell you. Helena's life would never be the same if anyone found out who her father is. I want her to grow up a bit more, she is still too small to defend herself."
The answer intrigued Barbara even more about what mystery could be behind Selina's child.
"Don't judge me for this…"
"I never would do that." She didn't know what to say.
"Thanks. I must go, I need to pick up her." The blonde turned and opened the door, "Thanks for loving her so much."
The redhead watched her walk outside and close the door.
The door closed. Barbara looked at the envelope again. Selina must be joking. She moved back to the couch and sat down slowly, opening the envelope. Green eyes focused on the words trying not to miss any of it.
Her eyes stopped on a sentence and froze.
"…I, Selina Kyle, hereby grant Barbara Gordon complete and legal guardianship of my daughter, Helena Kyle, in the event of my death, until she is of legal age…"