A/N: Here I go, starting another story when I could be updating my already started one's. Fact is, I'm kind of on a yaoi writing spree right now. Well, enjoy.
Disclaimer: I guess I never really can say it enough, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh.
DO I LOVE YOU? Chapter 1
Yuugi idly looked out the window at the dreary landscape. It had been a rather bland day; the drizzling rainfall and the cloudy, sunless sky had made for a chilly temperature, and the brisk wind had sent a chill down his spine when he'd ventured outside.
The worst part was; the weather seemed to fit the emotions coming through his link with Yami perfectly.
He looked back down at his homework in front of him, trying to concentrate on it. He knew that if he didn't get it done the teacher would be angry, but his mind was just on other things today. Particularly Yami. He'd seemed so down lately, but Yuugi couldn't figure out why. Every attempt he made to break through the mental barriers Yami put up only resulted in stronger ones being put in their place. Whenever Yuugi entered a room, Yami would promptly leave it. It was clear that whatever was bothering Yami was something that he didn't care to share with Yuugi, which only made him wondered if he'd done something to upset the former pharaoh.
He wanted so badly to confront Yami and demand that he tell him what was bothering him so much. But he didn't want to invade Yami's privacy either. He knew when Yami was ready to tell Yuugi what was going on he would. Yuugi just had to be patient.
His gaze returned to his homework. The open geometry book on his desk seemed to stare at him, as did the blank piece of paper next to it. He picked up his pencil, but after a few moments looking at the book blankly, put it down again.
If something was bothering Yuugi then wouldn't Yami do everything he could to help? Yuugi contemplated this for a moment. He knew it was the truth, and he felt obligated to do the same for Yami. After all, Yami had helped him countless times in the past.
Yuugi shut his textbook and stood up from his desk. He was going to confront Yami, but he wasn't going to be demanding. He was determined to help Yami through this, and Yuugi knew Yami needed his help whether or not Yami knew it himself.
Walking down the hall to Yami's bedroom suddenly seemed to take an extremely long time. It was as if the hallway got longer as Yuugi walked, and every step brought with it doubt as to whether or not he should really go through with this. After all, every other attempt to talk to Yami thus far hadn't worked, so maybe he should wait until Yami talked to him? He shook the thoughts out of his head. He couldn't back down now, he had to be brave and go through with this, for Yami.
Yuugi found Yami sitting in an old, creaky chair that he had in his room. A small lamp on his desk provided only a dim glow of light, but Yami hadn't bothered to turn any other lights on. He was just staring off at seemingly nothing. Yuugi quickly realized that Yami hadn't noticed him yet, a rather uncomforting fact knowing the former pharaoh's typical alertness.
Yami turned his head slightly, and in doing so saw Yuugi out of the corner of his eye. He jumped out of his chair, but Yuugi moved to stand in the doorway. He wasn't going to let Yami walk away this time, he would find out what was wrong.
"Please tell me what's wrong, Yami. I'm worried about you, you've been so down lately. Was it something I said, or something I did?"
A pained expression crossed Yami's face. "No, aibou, please don't blame yourself for this," he looked down at the floor then and quietly added, "It's my fault I feel this way."
"What do you mean 'feel this way'? What are you feeling Yami? I want to help you, but I can't do that if you don't tell me what's wrong!"
The former pharaoh lifted his head again to reveal tear-filled eyes. Yuugi let out a small gasp, it was the first time he'd ever seen his Yami cry. He opened his mouth to speak again, but stopped as Yami approached him. Then Yami looked Yuugi in the eyes for a moment, before grabbing his shoulders a pushing him into a strong, but gentle kiss.
The caress lingered for only a short moment, during which time Yuugi was left completely shocked. He was given little time to react, however, as shortly there after Yami slipped past him and made a dash for the staircase.
Yuugi chased after Yami, and he could see the tears now streaming out of his eyes behind him as he ran. Halfway done the stairs Yuugi caught up with him and grabbed his arm, but Yami just wrenched himself free and ran faster. He was headed for the front door.
"Please, Yami, stop! Don't leave!"
The spirit stopped then, hearing the pain and desperation in Yuugi's voice. Yuugi could see in his face that it hurt him to be disobeying his hikari, to be causing Yuugi hurt like this. But Yuugi could also tell that'd he already made up his mind, and his hand was already on the doorknob.
Yuugi sat on the couch, now crying himself. It was his fault; he had driven Yami to leave. He shouldn't have bothered trying to help, should have realized that all he would do was make matters worse. But at the same time, Yuugi also felt like Yami had been planning on leaving anyway, that if he hadn't tried to help Yami would have just snuck out of the house that night.
He choked on a sob. He couldn't help but think about what Yami had said before he left, what he had done. It was obvious that Yami loved him, that what was bothering him all this time, unreturned emotions towards his hikari. What Yuugi wasn't sure of was, whether he did return the feelings Yami had for him. He had enjoyed the kiss, that he knew for sure; even thinking about it caused a slight burning in his cheeks. But was it love he was feeling? That he had no idea about.
It was getting late, however, and Yuugi knew that sitting on the couch and crying wouldn't bring Yami back. So he decided that he would go to bed, and try to find Yami the next day when his mind was a little clearer.
Yuugi sat with his head down on the desk. He'd gotten very little sleep the night before, and he was regretting it deeply. Not to mention that Yami leaving hadn't truly sunk in until that morning. But Yami really was gone, and still wasn't back. Yuugi didn't know if he ever would come back. He grimaced, angry with himself for even considering the possibility. He knew his Yami wasn't gone for good.
"Hey bud, are ya alright? Ya seem kinda down today." Yuugi hadn't noticed Jounouchi come over, and jumped slightly when his friend spoke.
"It's Yami, Jou. He's been really upset lately, and last night when I tried to find out what was wrong he sort of…freaked out and then he ran out of the house. And he still hasn't come back." He intentionally left out Yami kissing him, he wasn't sure if he, or Yami for that matter, was ready for everyone else to know how Yami felt about him. He wasn't even sure if he had been ready.
"He ran away?! Dat's not like 'im at all. Well, you're gunna go look for 'im, right?" Yuugi nodded his response. "I'll help ya then." Jou finished.
"That's alright, Jou. I think I want to go alone; it'll be less awkward for him if I do find him. But thanks."
"Alright, buddy. If you're sure ya don't want help."
Yami walked along the park in the light drizzle that the previous day's rain had died down to. He wasn't sure how long he'd been walking; all he knew was he hadn't stopped since he'd ran from Yuugi the night before. He never strayed far from the game shop, just a far enough distance that Yuugi wouldn't look out the window and see him, or run into him on his way home from school. He wasn't worried about getting lost, he'd always been good at finding his way around, but he didn't want to get to far away, in case he wanted to return.
He knew he'd have to go back eventually. For one thing, he was completely soaked from the rain, and he was started to get cold. But he also knew that he needed to confront Yuugi.
Yuugi. Would Yuugi even want him back now? He'd acted rashly, not only in running away, but also in kissing Yuugi. Now Yuugi was probably angry with him, and disgusted. But what if he isn't? What if he feels the same way about you? You'll never know unless you go back there and talk to him. He sighed, he'd tried to tell himself that hundreds of times while he'd been walking, and it still wasn't very convincing. It was doubtful that Yuugi loved him; that would be too good to be true.
A couple walking by stared at him for a moment, then quickly averted their gaze. He chuckled under his breath; he knew exactly why they were staring at him. They were bundled up in their nice warm rain-resistant jackets, carrying an umbrella, and there he was in a muscle shirt and a pair of old flannel pajama pants. Not to mention the fact that his hair was drooping under the added weight of the water. He was suddenly reminded how cold he was, and he shivered. He looked for a moment in the direction of the Kame Game Shop.
"I think it's about time I went home." He said to himself.
Yuugi flopped down on the couch. He'd searched for hours, but couldn't find a single trace of Yami. He looked hopefully at the door, wanting it to open and for Yami to come walking through. But the door was closed, and Yami was still gone. He sighed, and for the next few minutes he just sat there in the silence.
Then he heard the doorknob turn, and for a moment wasn't sure if he was starting to hear things. But he hoped he wasn't, and looked up to find that the door was opening and it was Yami that was entering it. He ran to Yami, and embraced him in a tight hug.
"Yami, you're completely drenched." He pulled away to look at Yami. But Yami merely pulled him back into the hug, realizing that Yuugi was wet as well. Has he been looking for me?
"I'm so sorry, Yuugi. I acted foolishly yesterday. And I shouldn't have run away, I didn't mean to worry you so much. I just," He paused, not entirely sure what he should say, "Yuugi, I love you."
Yami's confession was met by silence, and it took all his strength to prevent himself from crying. I knew it, he doesn't love me. Yuugi saw the hurt expression consume Yami's features and he bit his lip. He wanted to badly to tell Yami that he was in love with him, to make his pain go away. He knew he could say that, if he lied he was risking Yami getting hurt even more. But he just didn't know what to say.
The fact is, Yami, that I don't know what I'm feeling right now. It might be love, but it might be something else. I'm not sure. But, I would like a chance to find out."
Yami smiled. Just knowing that Yuugi had any kind of special feelings for him helped, and he was willing to do anything for a chance for Yuugi to truly return his love. He risked a kiss, but this time it wasn't forced, and Yuugi returned the gesture. The two lingered for a few moments, until Yami reluctantly pulled away; he didn't want to do anything that might overwhelm Yuugi before he was ready.
I can live with that answer.
TBC
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