Broekn

By: Roxeant

Warning: This story is strictly a Raven/Beast Boy, Robin/Starfire story. Now, if you read this and flame me for other reasons than the pairings, than. . . I won't kill you. If you flame me for the pairings, I will. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!

One more thing. If you support other pairings, this will probably highly offend you. I expect a lot of flames in the future. Ah well.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Teen Titans, or any related characters. I also do not own some of the fanfics mentioned in here. By the way, the Robin/Raven Fanfic, entitled 'Broekn', is not based on a real fanfic. . . kinda. It's a combination of the many horribly mangled ones I've read. (I mainly read a few so that I could gather info and make a parody someday.)

I am also not a member of the R/BB 'Shippers. But, Kudos to them! If I knew how to join, I'd gladly do so. D00d, they're like, kickarse! KUDOS TO THE 'SHIPPERS! Hope ya don't mind that I mentioned the lighter. . . I kinda saw it as free advertizing. . .

I did see an Aqualad/Cyborg fic once. Made me crack up. I forget who wrote it, but, yeah, it did get mentioned in there.

Unfortunately, I actually do believe that lots of the Slade/Robin fics out there could be justified. I don't like the pairing, but it seems, well, realistic. In a creepy sort of way. (Ew).

But the Titans aren't real anyway (though like hell I wish they were), so it doesn't matter.

I decided not to mention Terra much in this for a reason: I didn't know what to do with her. Forgive me. Terra? I can like her or hate her, as long as she's not with our favorite green changeling, who is, of course, meant for Raven. And Raven only.

So, enjoy! And, if you hate it, feel free to flame. Then, I can point and laugh at you for being idiots.

Update: There were a few errors in the original version, and I've fixed them. Friggin fanfiction. . .

Raven's cheeks heated, and a nearby lamp exploded.

A few seconds later, the four other Teen Titans heard the same message inside their heads: 'Main Room. Now.' Raven did not sound happy, and they hurried. Wouldn't you?

Robin was the first to arrive.

"Raven?" he asked, stepping forwards cautiously and glancing at her with a wary expression, "are you. . . okay?"

"Okay?" Raven spat, "okay? Look, Robin! LOOK!" And she grabbed Robin's wrist, dragged him over to the couch, and shoved his face in front of the laptop that she had been using.

He stared. "What's this? And why are yo-"

He paused as he glanced once again at the webpage. The first link on the screen caught his eye.

'Broekn'

When Robni finaly figres out he liks Raevn, she diesstory muc beter than sumary, promis.

Robin gagged. "What? What is this? Who wrote these? What are they?"

"Rather bad interpretations of our romance lives," Raven drawled.

". . . Raven, I don't mean to hurt you, but. . . I just don't. . . like. . .you. . . inthatway. . . And, I think I want to throw up now."

Raven smiled. "I understand, Robin. Besides, I've also been paired with Cyborg, Starfire, Jinx, imaginary titans that the authors wish were real, Terra, and Beast Boy. Not to mention Slade."

Robin's face turned chalk white.

"What are the other pairings that are out on this. . . Fanfiction. . .?"

"Just about everyone with everyone. Some have you with Beast Boy, me, only seen one or two with you and Cyborg. You and Jinx are together in a few. . . But, the main preference seems to be you and Starfire, or some sort of rape story involving you and Slade."

Robin wasn't sure whether he was sick or extremely pleased.

". . ." he said.

Raven understood. "Shall I give you time to recuperate?"

Robin nodded slowly, and quickly hurried over to a corner, muttering and huddling into a ball before slowly rocking back and forth. Raven knew that he would be mentally broken and scarred for a while.

Cyborg and Starfire came in together. Starfire immediately rushed over to Robin, but when she put a hand on his shoulder, he did not respond. "Raven?" she asked, "is Friend Robin well?"

Raven sighed. "In a way, no. I think he's partially overjoyed because random fans of ours have written romance stories about him and. . . well, to be perfectly honest, you. . . and he's partially sickened because some people think he should be paired (willingly or unwillingly) with our nemesis, Slade."

Starfire seemed a little confused, and as Raven did not want to explain the Robin/Slade pairing to her at the moment, she decided to let it drop.

Cyborg, whose eyes had grown very, very wide, began to laugh. He laughed, partially because it was funny, and partially because he didn't know what else to do. "Oh god. . . Who writes these things? Don't they have lives?"

"Apparently not," Raven muttered.

"Oh god. . . don't tell me. . . They've put me with you? Who else?"

"Everyone else. And, actually, there aren't all that many with me and you in them."

"Who am I with usually, then?"

"Usually, no one. Or, sometimes, Made-Up Characters. Lately, Cyborg/Jinx pairings have been on the rise. There was one in which you were paired with Aqualad. I found that one rather amusing."

Cyborg's eyes popped out of his head. ". . . Does he know about these?"

"How should I know?"

"So, who are you with?"

"Just about everyone at one point or another."

". . . And you read these?"

"Yes, mainly to laugh at them or to try and find out the true identities of the authors so that I can put them on my 'To Kill' list."

Beast Boy came in next, stumbling all the way. "Sorreh I'm laeh-" he mumbled, chugging a glass of water that he held in his hand. He swished, swallowed, and grinned. "Was brushing my teeth."

Raven rolled her eyes. "Typical."

"So, what's the news?"

Starfire told him. "Raven is disturbed because people that she calls 'authors' have written stories about Robin and Slade as a. . . couple." She could not hide the envy in her voice.

Raven almost laughed at Beast Boy's expression. Almost.

"Oh god. . ." he mumbled.

"There's more," Raven said. "Much more. We've all been paired with just about everyone else in the tower, every villain, and many people/wanna-be heroes that don't even exist."

"You and Slade?" Beast Boy choked out.

"It's happened," she muttered darkly.

"You and. . ."

"Everyone. Starfire, Cyborg, Mr. Boy-Wonder over there, Jinx. . . just to name a few."

Beast Boy almost fell over.

Meanwhile, Starfire was trying to revive Robin.

After a lot of pulling, she had finally dragged the protesting leader to her room. She had not been able to get him up off of the floor.

And so, she sat down next to him. He rocked back and forth, humming to himself.

"Robin," Starfire said gently, putting a hand on his shoulder, "you must revive. . . The things Raven mentioned. . . they were just stories! They are not true."

Robin looked up at her, his eyes shining like a small child's. But they soon looked scared and glassy again. "But. . . Slade. . . me. . . together. . . AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"It couldn't possibly happen!"

". . . It could, and you know it, and it scares the heck outta me! I DON'T WANT TO BE THE SEX TOY OF A PSYCHO!" he yelled.

"Sex toy of a psycho? Is it the 'toy' part that is undesirable, or the 'psycho' part?"

Robin began to look very embarrassed. ". . . The psycho part."

Starfire decided not to respond to this.

". . . I fear that I do not know much about earth culture, but. . . I think that I should not repeat what we have just said?"

Robin nodded. "Yes. Please don't, Star. . ."

Starfire smiled. "Do not worry, Friend Robin," she said happily. "I will make sure that you are never Slade's toy of sex! I am going to keep you instead."

Robin's eyes went wider than before.

"Robin? Friend Robin? Have I said something wrong?"

". . . You didn't mean to say anything wrong, Star, it's just the way that you said it."

Starfire decided not to ask. "Shall we go to the training room?" she asked. "You often enjoy training. Perhaps kicking the dummy that you have so carefully drawn Slade's features on will make you feel better?"

Robin nodded. "Yes, yes. . . I think I will. . ."

And so, the two (one scarred for life, and one confused as to what she had said that had startled Robin) walked off to the training room to beat up the Slade dummy.

As soon as Star and Robin left, Cyborg quickly rushed to his room, not saying a word. Raven laughed. Beast Boy looked at her. "What. . . where's he going?" Beast Boy asked.

"Oh, probably to look at the R section on fanfiction. He'll find it sooner or later."

Beast Boy's face flushed. "They have an R section? About our team? WHAT THE H-"

Raven nodded.

Beast Boy's eyes narrowed. "How do you know this?"

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Beast Boy. You know I wouldn't. . ."

Beast Boy nodded. "Sorry. Just a little. . . well. . ."

"I'm going to get some tea," Raven mumbled. "I've had quite enough humiliation for one day."

As she walked towards the kitchen, Beast Boy sat down on the couch, and gazed at the laptop. Suddenly, he noticed that there was another window at the bottom of the page. He tentatively touched the mouse, and opened it.

It was a fanfiction, and he began to read avidly. He was, after all, curious about these things. . .

After a few sentences, he blinked, rubbed his eyes, pinched himself, and continued reading. This was about him! Him, and. . . Raven. His jaw touched the floor.

But, he kept reading.

At the end of the fanfiction, he was still flabbergasted. This, however, was not shocking in the least compared to what he saw next. There was another window next to the second. He opened it.

The heading said: "Review"

People could review these stories? Apparently so. A text box was below the heading. And someone had typed something in it.

'I really enjoyed this story. It was well-written, charming, and, dare I say it, sweet. A very successful romance story.

By the way, I like the pairing. I can't picture Raven with Robin or Cyborg or. . . well. . . anyone else.

Keep on writing.'

Raven came back in the room, saw Beast Boy at the laptop, froze, and turned right back around to march into the kitchen.

Beast Boy didn't let her. He darted forwards, grabbed her, and twirled her around. ". . . Raven, this is weird. Why did I find out that you liked me by reading a review for a story written by an anonymous author who doesn't even know us?"

Raven didn't answer.

"You do like me, right?"

". . . Better you than Slade."

Beast Boy, even though the moment was awkward and tense, laughed. It was kind of funny, in a twisted sort of way. "Guess you're right. . ."

"There are others."

"Others?"

"Stories about us."

"Really?"

"Many. We're one of the more popular pairings. They've even got this lighter thing. Keep the faith. . ."

Beast Boy laughed. "Obsessed fans are weird."

"Yeah," Raven agreed. Both felt much more at ease, much more relaxed.

"So, are we gonna talk about this?"

Raven nodded. "We'd better. I really. . . do like you, I guess. . ."

"If I kissed you right now, would something explode?"

"Most likely."

"Damn."

"Items can be replaced. . ."

"We should talk first."

"Yeah. . ."

"But, I guess we'd better start saving up some cash. . ."

"I'll try not to break the TV or your Gamestation. . ."

Beast Boy offered Raven his arm, and she took it, smiling ever-so-slightly. "Off to your room? We've got a lot to talk about."

She nodded. "Yes. And, one more thing. . ."

"Yeah?"

". . . We should get some sort of child block for the computer. I do not want to know what Cyborg could find in the R section . . . It would haunt me for life."