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The Rule

I. Hate. Jimmy. Neutron.

I hate James Isaac Neutron.

I absolutely, without a doubt, cannot stand Jimmy Neutron.

Oh, and have I told you that I really hate that stupid boy, Jimmy Neutron?

Why? Why?!

Oh, I'll tell you why....

Number 1: Her.

Betty. Quinlan.

Need I say more?

Well, I don't, but I will.

Betty Quinlan, little miss queen of Lindbherg Elementary, has the audacity, the vanity, the...pure streak of evil to flirt non-stop with my boy genius.

Uh, I mean, the boy genius. Not "my" because Jimmy isn't mine...And I don't want him to be. Well, I do but I...I mean...forget it.

The point is, that girl, who's I.Q. is only superior to my rubber duck, thinks so much of herself that she flirts with Jimmy. Jimmy! Jimmy Neutron! For the love of God, is there no justice in this world? He's so not her type! And you know what? She knows it! She just flirts with anything that has a pulse!

And Jimmy Neutron, that butt-brain, lets her! Urgh.

It drives me insane.

Number 2: Them.

Sheen and Carl, St. Jimmy's band of merry followers.

Ok, so they aren't "merry followers" but they sure do piss me off! They tease me and act like I'm just some stupid girl.

And Jimmy, who I still cannot stand, just lets them! Probably because he agrees with them, the stupid jerk.

He thinks I'm a moron, I know it. When he talks to me...Ugh! He makes sure he sounds like he's talking to a five-year-old little kid who doesn't even know which way is left and which is right. It just irritates me, you know?

I'm not trying to be vain, but I am smart! Why can't Jimmy and his stupid friends (but mostly Jimmy) appreciate that? What did I ever do to give them any right to condescend me?

I'll bet it's because I'm blonde.

Or because I'm a girl.

I hate them.

But I hate him much more. And here's the number one reason why...

Number 3: The Rule.

There are always rules in life, and they're put there for a reason. The rule I follow is made for one reason: To break my heart.

It's the rule of unrequited love. Or, like. Or...whatever it is that I'm up to my ears in right now. Rule of denial. Rule of rivalry.

I hate the rule almost as much as I hate Jimmy. It tears my heart out of my chest, puts it under Jimmy's foot, and lets him step on my poor, breaking cardiovascular muscle anytime time, day or night, that he feels like causing me pain.

The rule is this:

Thou shall not covet thy enemy.

And because of the idiot Jimmy, I am in direct violation of my number one rule. Because I can't love Jimmy, I'm not allowed.

If I love him, I want him. But I can't have him.

So, of course, just to bring more pain into my life, he decides in his twisted little mind to make me fall in love with him. God, he's annoying.

I hate him. I hate him! I HATE HIM!

Number 4: He's driving me completely insane.

Look at me, wasting time and thought on him when it's obvious how the story is going to turn out! He'll forget me, go after some girl prettier and smarter and...just all around better than I am. Just like he always does and always will.

And then, to make matters far worse, I can't say a word because of this damn rule that I wrote myself!

sigh

It's not like he's completely cruel to me all the time, and that's probably why I'm in this mess. If he was a big, stupid jerk with the ego the size of the moon (Okay, I'll admit, he does have that) then I'd probably have no trouble hating him.

But sometimes...sometimes we'll have moments where we actually get along. He'll treat me like an equal, like a real person. And I just want to cry during those moments because I love them and I love him and I just don't want it to ever end because I'll miss the moment so much. He'll smile at me and I'll silently die inside. I know I'm going to miss that smile until the next time he does smile at me.

 double sigh

Why not tell him, you ask?

The rule.

Libby once said all I had to do is say the word and Jimmy would be mine. I wonder if she's right.

I'm angry with her for saying that, because now I'm fighting so hard not to say the word. Or words. Or whatever it takes to get Jimmy to notice me, even for a minute. He passes me by and I have to bite my tongue until it bleeds to I don't let those doomed words slip from my lips.

Lips...Mmm...Jimmy's on mi – Oh, Cindy, get a hold of yourself, girl.

See what he's done to me? He's made into a cliché little school girl who would follow him to the ends of the earth. And I think he knows it, too. Because he's driving me up the wall with his stupid, goofy smiles and his secret glances. My mind's spinning and my heart's beating and I feel like I'm going to burst with the anticipation.

He won't give me a single clue as to how to get him, either. Not that I could because of this rule, but I'm itching to know anyway. I want to – No, I must – know how to get him to love me. He's stupid and smart and cute and annoying and he makes my heart pound and I need him. And I need to know how to get that boy genius in my arms.

God, I hate him.