Midnight Musings
PaintedTyrant
She couldn't sleep.
No, she wasn't worried about hollows. Okay, so maybe she was a little bit worried, but that wasn't the cause of her insomnia. The cause was simple. She couldn't decide who she would choose between Renji and Ichigo. She wasn't an idiot; she knew how those two had looked at her when they thought she wasn't looking. She hadn't missed their gazes.
Ichigo had managed to drive back Menos Grande from the mortal realm and she was sure that the shinigamis at Soul Society would have found that out by now, and soon, they would send some after her. She would have to see Renji again, she would have to leave Ichigo. When it all came down to it, who would she choose?
Rukia sighed; she obviously wasn't going to get any sleep tonight, at least, not until she made a decision.
She thought of Renji. She thought of their childhood, or memories she had been unwilling to forget. Yes, they weren't exactly happy memories, but after living for so long, memories came and went, and so she treasured the ones that remained.
Renji had always been there for her. They took care of each other; they made sure that they survived, especially after the loss of their three friends. Living in sector 78 had been awful, she could testify to that, but because he was with her, all the pain and disappointment had seemed to lessen. She had survived because he was there with her, and he survived because she had always been there next to him.
Hearing a slight snore from outside the closet, Rukia's thoughts wandered to Ichigo. The boy, the teenager, the man who carried too much responsibility on his shoulders. She admired him, first for being able to withstand such responsibility, and second for maintaining such firm determination.
Most importantly, after less than two months together, she trusted him completely.
He had taken on her shinigami duties, yes, but it had been her mistake that led to that in the first place. The dramatic change in his life and fate was a result of her mistake, and no matter what she did, what she would do, she could never repay him.
She sighed again. That question was becoming harder to answer... who would she choose?
Discontent, Rukia decided the only way for her to be able to fall asleep was to drink a glass of milk; it had worked before after all. As silently as she could, she slid the closet door open and made her way over to Ichigo. He wouldn't have liked being woken up in the middle of the night, but Rukia didn't know where the milk was.
As she approached, she saw that he was smiling. Rukia concluded that he was having a good dream, and that he would yell at her for waking him up.
He looked nice when he smiled, and she decided that he should do it more often. Although she had an idea of why he acted so grumpy all the time, she wanted to see him smile. He looked so calm when he did, so peaceful. She wanted to be able to make him smile.
Smiling, Rukia pulled the disheveled blanket up to his chin. If he had a cold, he would be grumpier than usual and the chances of him smiling would diminish, and she didn't want that of course. After a few moments of silence, she quietly made her way back to the closet. She didn't need that glass of milk anymore... she had made her choice..
I actually have another ending written out for this too.... it's RenRuki though. If anyone's interested, I'll put it up as a second chapter type of thing...