Disclaimer: I have no ownership in Inuyasha whatsoever. Don't sue! All I've got are my sick fantasies, and about fifteen dollars! :o

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I always knew Jakotsu Ushitora was going to be trouble. Always. From the very minute I met the kid, I knew it could only go downhill from there. As if moving to a new town, a new neighborhood, and a new school wasn't bad enough at the tender age of six, I had to start dealing with him too. Freaky, stupid, perverted…freak that he is.

Jakotsu was actually the very first thing I saw when I got out of the family van. He was sitting right next door, rolling a bright pink ball up against the side of his house over and over. I stifled a laugh, because obviously the only reason he was doing it was because he had no friends to play a real game with. Of course, I didn't have any friends either, but that was beside the point.

My mom is a very charitable woman. TOO charitable, in my opinion. She saw Jakotsu too, and do you know what she did? What she had the nerve, the gall, the spite to do? She told me to go over and play with him while she, dad, and my older brother, Sesshoumaru, unpacked. I knew he was going to be trouble, so I refused. Unfortunately, she wouldn't have no for an answer, and I was to go over and play with "that cute little boy" right now.

She's charitable, but I don't think she has much sense. Jakotsu couldn't exude the aura of 'Stay away from me. I'm a freak.' harder if he had it on a sign taped to his back in humungous letters. It's just that noticeable.

I approached apprehensively, standing right behind him, hardly breathing. Maybe, I'd thought, if I stood still and quiet enough, he'd never detect me.

Wrong.

Almost immediately, he turned around, and upon giving me a very critical once-over (especially considering we were six), his face split into a giant grin that almost sent me running. Trouble. "Hi! What's your name?" he asked enthusiastically.

Innocent enough question. "Inuyasha," I answered quickly. He stared at me, and it took a minute for me to realize that he was waiting for me to ask him for his name. Ha! Well, he'd have been waiting an awfully long time. I had no intention of ever finding out anything about him; the less I knew, the better.

"I'm Jakotsu," he said amicably, after he saw that I wasn't going to ask him. "Wanna play?"

No, I did NOT want to play. But over by the car, my mom made a nodding gesture. I decided that I was tough enough to put up with this scary kid for a while. "Ok," I muttered, not even trying to sound happy about it.

This did not deter Jakotsu. Something I have learned in all the years I've known him is that it is absolutely useless to ever, ever try to deter him. He's like cockroach – you can stomp on him as much as you want, but he'll keep coming back. "Great! Sit over there – no, not that far over. Just come a little this way, and sit like this. There."

I couldn't help but notice, even in my six-year-old naïveté, that my current position was a little awkward. All my good clothes were packed away, and I was wearing a pair of shorts that were too short for me, but not too small. I was aware that if he squinted the right way, he could get an eyeful more than I ever wanted him to. I hoped my family finished unpacking quick. This was going to be about as much fun as getting dropped into a pit of piranhas.

So we sat there for the next hour, rolling a ball back and forth. Jakotsu talked a lot. A LOT. Within the first fifteen minutes, I'd found out that he had a sixteen-year-old brother named Musou, a nine-year-old sister named Kagura, a one-year-old sister named Kanna, and his stay-at-home mom was expecting again. His father, Naraku, ran the primate area of the local zoo. He was six too, and his best friend was named Bankotsu. He had five other friends whose names all ended with '-kotsu', but I couldn't keep the rest of their names straight.

"What about your family, Inuyasha?" he asked finally, apparently only just getting tired of telling me about himself. I noticed how slowly he seemed to say my name, like it gave him a thrill beyond any other to roll it across his tongue. And let's take another minute to remember that I was six here. Six-year-olds are pretty oblivious, unless something is blindingly obvious. This was beyond blindingly obvious.

"Uh…my mom…she works at home. My dad owns a big company. My older half-brother, Sesshoumaru, is ten, and I hate him." There. That should've worked. Should've pleased him – I answered the dumb question, you know.

"Oh. Why did you guys move? Why is Sesshoumaru your half-brother? What are your parents' names? What kinds of things do you do for fun? How come you have puppy ears on your head? Where are you going to school this fall, Inuyasha?" he just spit the questions out one after another. I had one for him: What if I don't want you to know, because I think you're the most annoying thing on the planet?

Instead, I considered what my mom would do on the off chance that saying that made him cry. It wouldn't have been pretty or nice. Somehow, explaining how Jakotsu just annoyed me was that much harder than feeling it. "We moved because my dad's company moved its headquarters here. Sesshoumaru's mom was my dad's first wife, but she died. My mom is named Izayoi and my dad is named Inutaishou. I…" I wondered how to make my life seem as boring as possible. "I…read. I read a lot. And sit in my room playing one-player video games. I don't know why I've got the ears. And I don't know where I'm going to school either."

"What kind of books do you like to read? My friend Renkotsu reads lots too," said Jakotsu conversationally.

I didn't care about his friend, and actually, I'd picked up about five books in my life. Picture books.

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I was thankful to whatever deity (or deities) there is when I was finally able to go home that day. Never again would I put up with Jakotsu, this I promised myself. No matter what sort of threats my parents placed upon me, no matter if it was the difference between life and death, I was never going to have anything do with him and his strangeness. Once was enough.

I guess he didn't get the memo, though. It was eleven-thirty at night, and I was sleeping in my new room, when I heard something rapping on the window. At first I just ignored it, and tried to get back to sleep, muttering a few words my parents would've been shocked that I knew. Eventually, however, it kept getting louder and louder, until it was impossible to ignore.

Slowly getting out of bed and stumbling to the window with the intent to yell at whatever was out there, a thought crossed my mind. What if it was a demon? Or a murderer? 'Stupid,' I thought, and began to lift the window.

It was worse than a demon or a murderer. It was Jakotsu.

"W – what are YOU doing here?!" I yelped, a little taken aback.

Smiling, he responded calmly, "I was thinking about it, and I decided that I want you to be my boyfriend." It wasn't a question. I could only stare, horrorstricken, until I regained my senses.

"No thanks," I snapped, shutting the window on him.

I was really stupid back then, I think. For one shining, glimmering night, I'd held the hope that maybe that had been the last of Jakotsu.

I haven't been more wrong about anything in my life before or since.

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