A/N: Sorry about the no update. I wasn't as much as 'Writer's Block' as it was 'Man, this chapter is fucking pissing me off'. You'll understand later. This chapter was sorta like the Chapter that you guys would all dread to have to write. Anyway, questions! YEY! Answers:
1) Yes I watch Family Guy if It's on. Why? o.O 2) Yup that's the show.
Oh, incase you forgot the winning teams:
1- Green Monkeys (Elk, Mia)
2- Orange Iguanas (Crim, Mistral)
3- Silver Snakes (Tsukasa, Subaru)
4- Pink Panthers (Sora, BT)
Last Thing, this chapter might be confusion.
.hackBOREDOM
KNOWLEDGE
"Is it recording?"
"Yes..."
"Oh!" Balmung jumped in front of the camera. "Welcome back to Legends of the Hidden Temple! These four teams have past the moat, but now a even greater test awaits them...The Steps of Knowledge!" Thunder boomed, a woman screamed, and someone's nails ran down a chalkboard. The teams all stood on a staircase with only four steps, all of them standing on the top step while Balmung stood at the foot of the stairs. "The rules are simple. Aura will ask you a question about a legend we are about to hear. If you think you know the answer, step down on the marker in front of you."
"Like this!" Subaru said, stepping her little foot onto the marker, barely touching it.
"Yes. Like that...I guess... The first two teams to reach the bottom steps will go onto the temple games!"
"YEY!" Cheered the four teams.
Balmung walked over to Aura. "It's time for you to give us a little history-"
"SCREW YOU!" She yelled.
"Now, Now, Aura...That's not enough information..."
Aura rolled her eyes. "OK! IT'S THE KEY OF THE TWILIGHT...AND IT'S IN THE KINGS STOREROOM!" The camera panned to a room with 3 stands. On one of the stands rested a normal looking key with glitter on it.
"Okay then! Are you guys ready to begin!" Balmung asked, getting a cheer from the Audience and the winning teams. "I can't hear you!" This time he got a even louder cheer. "COME ON! I KNOW YOU CA- OOF!" Balmung was hit in the head by a beer can, causing the loudest cheer ever to be heard.
"OKAY! FIRST QUESTION!" Yelled Aura. "WHAT IS TSUKASA'S NAME!" Elk stepped on his tablet first. "Green Monkeys?" Balmung asked.
"Bob..." They both replied in unison.
"CORRECT!"
"Hey, wait, that's not right!" Balmung tried to argue, but shut up quickly after receiving a death glare from Aura. Elk and Mia cheered and took a step down.
"SORA IS A WHAT! CRIMSON/SCARLET/NOW BLUE KNIGHT, PLAYER KILLER, OR A GIDDY 4 YEAR OLD?"
Sora and BT slammed down on their tablet. "Pink Panthers?" Asked Balmung.
"A Giddy 4 Year Old." Sora replied.
"WRONG!" Tsukasa and Subaru stepped down on their tablet.
"Silver Snakes?"
Subaru jumped up and down. "Like, Oh my gawd, this is like, soooooo simple. He's a Crimson/Scarlet/Now Blue Knight, Duuuuuuuh!"
"WRONG! YOU ALL SUCK!" Aura screamed, scaring Balmung to no end. "NEXT QUESTION, WHO IS MY FATHER!"
The four teams paused for a second, then Mistral stepped down on her tablet. "Orange people?"
"Um..." Mistral and Crim whispered to each other for a second, the Crim leaned forward. "Dare?"
"WRONG!" Mia stepped down on her tablet.
"Green Monkeys?" Balmung asked.
"Your father..." Elk paused for a second. "Is your daddy." The audience gasped at Elk's wisdom.
"CORRECT!"
The Green Monkeys cheered and took another step down. "And just like that, The Green Monkeys are only one step away from entering Aura's temple." Balmung announced. "Still enough time for the other teams. Next question."
"GENTALMEN! BEHOLD!" Aura said, raising her arm and making a giant rat appear. The rat gave a roar and ran off, not to be seen again for a few chapters. The teams just stared at Aura in confusion. "WRONG! NEXT QUESTION! WHAT IS THE BEST MMORPG EVER MADE!"
Tsukasa stepped down on the tablet. "Easy!" He said. "It's FFXI, Duuuuuuuh."
"Duuuuuuuh." Added Subaru.
"Duuuuuuuh." Replied Tsukasa.
"Duuuuuuuh." Subaru interjected, flipping her hair.
"Duuuuuuuh." They both said in unison.
"CORRECT!" Aura announced, letting Tsukasa and Subaru move down their first step. "HOW MANY FINGERS AM I HOLDING UP?" The girl yelled, hiding her hands behind her back. Sora and BT were the first to lock in.
"Seven?" BT asked.
"WRONG!"
Crim and Mistral hit their tablet next. "We can't see your hands..." Crim said.
"CORRECT!" The Orange Iguana cheered and took a step down.
"Correct?" Balmung asked in a surprised yet confused tone. "What the hell kind of questions are you ask-"
"SILENCE, YOU FOOLISH FOOL!"
"Okay, Okay!" Whimpered the system admin, as he ran off into a corner to hide.
Aura cleared her throat and continued. "HOW MUCH WOOD COULD A WOODCHUCK CHUCK IF..."
Mia and Elk locked in rather fast this time. "If a woodchuck could chuck wood." Elk answered.
"CORRECT!"
Some funky music plays as Elk and Mia take their last step down. "Well, it seems we have our first team! The Green Monkeys! We are still waiting for one more. Who wil-"
"I TOLD YOU TO BE QUIET!"
Balmung rolled his eyes. "Okay. Whatever."
"WHAT IS THE SERECT OF THE UNIVERSE!"
The teams paused and thought about it for a second. Tsukasa hit his tablet. "Silver Snakes?"
"The secret of the universe, is so simple, that it just might drive you guys insane." He explained. "Are you sure you want to hear it?"
"YES!"
Tsukasa took in a deep breath. "Okay. The secret of the universe is... pie..." The audience 'ooooh'ed and 'aaaah'ed at Tsukasa's intellect.
"CORRECT!" Barked the floating girl. Tsukasa and Subaru took their steps down and smiled. "NEXT QUESTION! WHY IS THE SKY BLUE?"
This time, the Pink Panthers answered. "It's blue because I, Gaia, The Spirit of the Earth, made it blue." BT said.
"CORRECT!"
Sora and BT gave each other a high five, then stepped down another step. "Just one more right answer for the Silver Snakes. The other teams can still catch up."
"NEXT QUESTION! WHO IS MY FATHER!"
"Uh, Aura, you did this one already." Balmung whispered, as to not piss off Aura anymore.
"OH. WRONG! NEXT QUESTION! WHAT IS 100x48x59x92x3x293x23x2891x6x29!"
A Silence fell over the studio. No one moved. No one took a breath. Until, one brave .hacker hit their tablet. "Silver Snakes!"
"264,969,037,035,763,200!" Subaru said with a smile.
All eyes fell upon Aura. "...SHE IS CORRECT!"
Cue funky music. Tsukasa and Subaru took their last step down, then began to jump and cheer with Elk and Mia. "Congratulations Green Monkeys and Silver Snakes!" Balmung announced, walking over to the winning teams. "Oh, but Orange Iguanas and Pink Panthers, don't think you guys are going home empty handed! Aura, tell them what they've won!"
"YOU'VE WON A PENNY! IT'S A LITTLE GREEN CAUSE I FOUND THEM ON THE WAY HERE. BUT I DON'T GIVE A DAMN! GET OUT!"
Balmung gave a fake cheesy laugh. "When we get back from the commercial breaks, the Silver Snakes will go head to head with the Green Monkeys. But only one can enter the Hidden Temple!"
To Be Continued... Next Chapter- TEMPLE
A/N: Sorry guys. This isn't really the chapter I think you guys were waiting for. The reason it is so short is because It was suppose to be part of the last chapter, 'Legend'. Sorry. Now that It will be easier to write stuff, I'll be able to get up the next chapter quicker. Oh yeah:
Tsukasa: -Jumps up and pulls up a sign reading:-
Five Seconds with Tsukasa! (It's really more then 5 seconds... DON'T JUDGE ME!)
Tsukasa: Welcome! We're going to start the first chapter of FSWT(IRMT5S...DJM). Ahem. First Reviewer question comes from Roy?Link?EITHERONEISGOOD. Meh, Ness is the best. Anyway, he wrote:
"Tsukasa,
My little brother is so annoying... would you give me some advice? Or beat him up for me? PUHH-LLEAASE! Me mesa,
LRC "
Tsukasa: Oooh, little brothers suck. I'd beat him up for you, but I'm book solid. -Holds up his notepad- See? -Opens it and all the pages are blank- ...See? Anyway, here is what you do. You put some sleeping powder in his milk. Then, when he falls asleep, you tie him up, kidnap him and hold him for ransom. Your family will have to pay you, because they know you're crazy. You're reading this story. Once you get the money, you hide your brother in a closet then run away and start up a new life. There! Easy as pie! NEXT QUESTION! This is from Tristezza.
"Dear Tsukasa,
May I have permission to attack some guy at school for pissing me off constantly day after day?"
Tsukasa: My dear Tristezza. You have my blessings. Go. Go and show him what you can do. NEXT QUESTION! Wait...that's it! AAAH! THATS NOT ENOUGH! Okay, readers, listen. You guys better leave me some questions! I command it! No, not only I, but so does the... Seductive Twinkie! -Holds up a Twinkie- ... -Brings to wiggle the Twinkie back and forth and speak in a girly voice-
Seductive Twinkie: Oooh, Readers. You make me so hot. Leave questions and I'll take off my wrapper. If you know what I mean.
Tsukasa: -Normal- Ooooh boy, Seductive Twinkie, you slut! You've heard the girl! RE-
And that has been: Five Seconds with Tsukasa! (It's really more then 5 seconds... DON'T JUDGE ME!)