Point A to Point B

--Squirrel Tamer

--------

As he lay with his arms wrapped securely around her thin frame he found himself pausing to reflect. Her soft garnet hair curled inward to cradle her pale cheeks. She really was too pale. She looked half dead. He knew that her nights must have been riddled with insomnia and an unbearable chill that seeped into her flesh. She was shaking in his arms and he felt the need to pull her tighter. He didn't though. She would have pushed him even farther away. She never did like comfort or pity. She never liked anything, really.

She didn't like him. That was obvious. The only reason she was in his arms now was because it was part of his path. The only way to get from point A to point B was to pass her. She was just a bump, an obstacle. And he was nothing but a kid to her. He could never protect her the way that she needed to be protected. She needed someone big and strong to keep her safe from the cold cruel world. She needed someone to save her from herself.

He wasn't even out of college yet. He was still a kid. Oh sure, he could drive and he could drink; he could party and he could get laid, but he didn't know anything really. He didn't know what love was. He didn't know what it could do to people. He didn't know how she really felt about him, but then again neither did anyone else. She kept her emotions locked behind a scowl and those gorgeous red bangs. He may not have understood what love was, but that didn't mean that he wasn't looking. He had always been looking.

It began a long time ago. His first love had come along. She was a beautiful girl, with a shallow mind. She was not clever or witty and she didn't care. She didn't care about her family or her supposed friends. Even when he had found himself with his hand wrapped around hers he knew that she didn't care about him either. She said she did and there were times when she came close to caring, but her fear of being normal and common kept her from really feeling it. He tried to show her and she tried to understand, but it didn't work. Nevertheless, he played along. She was beautiful anyway. What did it matter if she only liked him, because he had turned out to be somewhat good-looking? They were together and when you're in high school that's all that matters.

At least it's all that matters until a week later you get dumped on your sorry ass. After that you like to pretend it never happened.

So she was gone, as quickly as she came and even though he had given himself to her, he felt no remorse. He was a man. He wasn't supposed to dwell on the loss. It wasn't a mistake to him. It was just a part of life. She was another one of those things on the way between point A and point B. It was natural and surreal in its own wicked way. He didn't think about it much. He had too many other things to consider.

That didn't mean that it didn't haunt him.

He never admitted it, but he had cared for her. Despite her shallow-mindedness and the lack of any individual thought, he felt something for her. It hurt to be left in the dirt like that.

He moved on.

After his failure with the beautiful girl, he decided it might be better to play it safe rather than put his heart on the line again. In waltzes the childhood friend who loved him more then he thought was even possible; the poor little girl who faced brutal words and neglect from her big monster of a sister. He took her as his at once. She giggled in delight and from then on you never saw one without the other. Connected at the hip and the lips and everywhere else. Everybody clicked their tongues and sighed happily. It was the perfect little romance story that everyone loved to hear about - cute and wonderful and full of innocence and wonder and it was so damn cliché.

Of course he never admitted that to himself. He thought he was happy. The years flew by and soon it was time to leave for college. She always looked like she was going to cry. He hated it when she cried. She looked as terrible as he felt. And he always felt terrible because he thought that she looked terrible and he didn't really care if she never stopped crying. He didn't want to comfort her. Not really. He just wanted to laugh and talk about little things. He couldn't talk about serious things with her. She didn't understand them. Her head was filled with innocence and sweet things. She didn't understand war or abortions or anything of the sort. She didn't have any moral dilemmas. The hardest thing was picking what to wear the next day. She really was quite dull.

He didn't notice.

He asked her to marry him. It was only fair. They'd devoted three years to each other. It was expected for them to be together forever. This way college wouldn't be able to tear them apart.

It was after the wedding rehearsal that he realized that he couldn't marry her. She was stupid and boring and not at all interesting or amazing. She wasn't beautiful to him. Not anymore. She seemed old and used and stale. It wasn't obvious to the eye. It wasn't something that you assumed would go stale; it was one of those things that just does and you may or may not notice it. Like water. She was like stale water. It doesn't seem like it happens and you can't tell its stale by looking at it, but it is.

"Heh. Stale water."

"What the hell are you mumbling about, twerp?"

He turned around slowly, his whole body filled with dread. He hadn't had a chance to talk to her for years. He never really wanted to either. She was one of those things about his past that he tried to forget.

"Hey, Vickie."

She looked different. Her hair was longer and let down so that it rested on her shoulders. She appeared older and more filled out then before. She was still quite thin. She was scowling at him and he wished that he could disappear. She had car keys in her hand and was tapping her foot impatiently.

"Well?"

He was confused. He felt his brows furrow.

"Well what?"

She sighed to let him know that he was annoying her.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, marrying my annoying little sister?"

Oh, so that's what she wanted, he thought to himself. He shrugged.

"I don't know."

She snorted.

"You're really screwed up, you know?" She smiled wickedly, "Guess you have me to blame for that, eh?"

He took a step towards her.

"Maybe. You did make my life a living hell."

"Yeah...Sorry about that, twerp." She sounded sincere, but he couldn't tell for sure. He took another step closer to her, though he didn't know why. "I didn't mean it. I did have reasons though, if you care to know." She looked down at the watch on her arms, "I have to go. I'm not coming tomorrow, though. This is enough of the actual wedding for me." She turned to her car. He felt the need to say something, do something to make her stop.

"I'm not marrying her."

She turned back with a smirk on her face.

"I know."

He didn't. He never even showed up for the ceremony. His parents had been very upset and disappointed with him. The bride's family had completely taken back their respect for him and his almost-bride had sent him back the engagement ring accompanied by a long angry letter calling him every terrible thing imaginable, which of course wasn't that terrible as her mind could not have accepted anything remotely mean to say. He laughed about it. He couldn't believe that he had almost married her.

He went to college and bided his time. His tormentor would come eventually. He was sure of it.

And so it had happened. He walked into Sal's bar last night to find her waiting for him. He wasted no time in hoisting her over his shoulder and carrying her to his apartment over the bar. What happened next was a series of blurs and emotions. He could still feel her all over him, around him and in him. The taste of her was still upon his lips. He barely even noticed when he subconsciously began running his fingertips lightly over her bare skin. She stirred.

"Timmy?" Her voice was soft and somewhat frightened. "What happened?"

He wanted to kiss her. Wanted to keep her with him forever. He didn't know what he was feeling. He didn't understand what was going on with him.

"Shh..." He breathed and then leaned into her until their lips connected. He pulled one hand up to cup her cheek and deepened the kiss. She moaned gently and kissed him back with force. She was beginning to run her hands through his hair when she suddenly pushed him away.

"No. Timmy, this isn't right. What the hell are we doing?!" She was beginning to grow frantic, "Aw fuck. I can't believe that we...Why did I let you-?...Timmy! What is going on?!" She was holding her head in her hands and shaking. He told his hormones to cool down and reached for her hands.

"Vickie, it's okay. Everything will be all ri-"

"NO! You don't understand. You think...You feel...This is just... There were no emotions involved! You don't feel anything for me! I was so stupid, because I should have known. Get away from me, twerp! I'm nothing to you!" She struggled to pull away from him, but he grasped her hands tighter. She gasped as he pulled her into him. She looked up at him with frightened eyes, while he brought his hands up to grasp her face.

"Vickie..." He didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to explain it all. "I-I..." Why was he so afraid of saying it? They were just words, right? "Do care...for you..." No, it was so much more than that. But how did he know that this was right?

He looked at her crying and he felt his heart go out to her. She had bags under her eyes and she was far from beautiful, but he didn't care. She was shallow and she had always loved pretty things, but she also cared about things too. She was intelligent and fiery and headstrong and she knew of the evils in the world.

"And I love you."

She seemed to collapse into him as she cried freely. He held her tightly to him and he knew that she felt it too. She had probably always felt it. She told him how she had always cared for him, how she always had to hide her emotions, how badly it hurt when she heard about him and her little sister. She told him how she had always wanted to be with him, but it was wrong in so many ways and she couldn't bring herself to face everybody's accusing looks and taunts. Then after the failed wedding...It seemed terrible of her to care for him still. Her family would always hate him.

He kissed her then. And she held onto him for dear life. He felt like laughing. She would never get stale. And maybe she wasn't just an obstacle.

Maybe.

Just maybe.

Maybe she was his point B.

----------

A/N: Another VickiexTimmy? I know, but I just had to write it. It popped into my head last night and now...here it is. Hope you enjoyed it.

Don't forget to review.