Okay peeps, I was having some serious word of mouth when I was writing this thing, so it's pretty long.

Summary: Flash to the Past, Tsume and Toboe's thoughts on one another around and during episode 4. So yeah, slash...ish

Disclaimer: Whatev.

Gravity

For some odd reason... Tsume, I never want to be from your side. I don't know what it is that draws me to you, but I am. It's like an electric force, and no matter what happens, it will never shut off, and I will always be drawn to you. Ever since I met you, and became your 'friend', it was there. I can't describe it... but, do you know what it is that I'm talking about? Do you feel the same gravity?

You aren't my friend... Toboe, and that's the way it will always be. I don't want to be around kids like you, people who can't handle stupid things like blood and death. Kids like you are a waste of my time. But thanks to that god damn Kiba, I can't get away from you. You're always there, circling me like the moon and Earth. There was gravity, and you fell for it.

I've always wanted someone special, and I think the more we all travel together, the more special we become to each other. I guess I'm kind of stupid for thinking this, but I think I'm just excited. I would never tell you this though, you'd probably just call me an idiot or a stupid kid. And whenever you do that, it hurts me. And I love it too, because it means that someone is paying attention to me. Someone is acknowledging me. And that is something I've always wanted.

I never liked to deal with people, and to tell you the truth, I hate traveling with everyone. I don't want to say this though, I can't stand when the Brat talks, or when Porky plays referee. I can't stand to see you upset too. It pains me in a way I don't want to feel pain. And it scares me, you scare me. Because you make me feel something I don't want to feel. And it's not right. I hate it when you look at me with those innocent eyes of yours, it makes me feel weak and insecure. Something that I don't want to feel.

Kiba, Hige, and you Tsume are all my friends. And I couldn't stand to watch them die or get hurt, so I want us to be together always, watching over each other. That is why I chased after you that day. I didn't want you to get hurt, I wanted you to stay. You pushed me aside, but only death could hinder me from following you. There's that gravity again. Did you feel it?

Brat, Porky, and you Kid are the least favorable people to spend time with. I could care less what happened to you, so that is why I left. You don't need me to be around and help you. But still you followed me. But you didn't give up, one thing I admire about you. You're strong, unlike me. So I desired to get away from you. But you bounced back. Back to me.

You saved me Tsume, much more than once. And for that, I am grateful. But when I look back, I find myself wondering why. You said you hated me, despised me. If that's true why did you save me? Do want me to die or live?

You killed me Toboe, so many times. And I hate you for it, and I don't know why. I hate you, and I don't at the same time. I forced myself to save you, because I don't want you to be hurt. I don't want you to die, but I want you apart from me.

I remember when we were being chased by that huge monster. You were hurt, and I didn't like it. But you pushed me away, insisting it was nothing. And when you told me we had to jump, it was the only way we could survive, I was afraid. And then you touched me. It was the first time you had touched me on your own free will, and it filled me with fire. I felt like a lit fuse, about to reach the dynamite. And I loved it. And you were hurt because of it. I didn't mean to hurt you.

You remember that time that huge robot monster thing was chasing us? I was hurt, and I saw in your eyes you blamed yourself because of it. But it was my decision. When the road came to a drop-off and we had to jump, I knew you were afraid. And I took your hand, something I couldn't believe I did. I must've been acting on instinct, but who knew instinct could be so nice? I felt like a hurricane, power-surged, a feeling I have never felt before. And I barely felt the pain.

I was afraid for you, Tsume. You weren't waking up, and bleeding badly. So I did what I had to do. It felt like my heart shattered when you pushed me away, rejecting me from wanting to help you. But I was glad that you were alright. I gazed at you, getting an eyeful of your delicious body. That scar on your chest intrigued me, but still you turned away.

I knew you were just trying to help. I didn't want anyone helping me, I'm fine on my own. I want you to understand that, kid, because when I push you away you're hurt. And the more gravitation between us, the more it hurts you. Kid, you're something I can't explain, something that shouldn't be but is. So I turn away from you.

Tsume, do you realize how much I care about you? After sitting in that cave with you for what seemed like hours, I knew I would do anything for you. I would die if that made you happy. But I can't explain why. It just is. That is why I risk my life for you, something I wouldn't normally do for people I barely know. But you are special to me, the world to me.

Toboe, why can't I hate you like I should? I hate you kid, but it's not the hate I feel for the Brat. It's the kind of jealousy hatred, it's not pure or straight-forward. I hate you for everything you've done to me, the way you've changed me. But it's a different hate, an alien feeling. And I don't like it. You changed me kid, for better ad for worse.

I've finally figured it out. Tsume, no matter what happens, I will always love you. I can't describe what kind of love it is, though. It's a special one, I'll keep it at that. I don't want to lose it, or you. I won't tell you though, I'll look on from the sidelines. Because that will make me happy, and I know it will make you happy too. And that is what I want. You are everything to me, and that will not change.

I'll never figure it out. Kid, I hate you, but at the same time, I can't do anything but... but not hate you? I can't find the words. I don't when they'll come to me, but they will. And if they do in this lifetime, I'll never tell you. I don't know if it would hurt you more than I already have. I will not mar the perfect damage I've inflicted on you. I will keep you the way you are, always mine.

I will always follow you Tsume, to the ends of Paradise. I will do it for all of us, because I love you.

I'll work harder for you Kid. But for now, ignore the gravity, and we'll both be happy with one another.

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Just review please, for my sake, and yours (give a cookie, get a cookie).