Title: My Will
Author: xAngelxWingsx
Disclaimer: I do not own Yuki (Thank God), Kyo (Damn), or any other Furuba characters.
Rating: PG-13, but only for Kyo's potty mouth.
Summary: One-shot. Kyo's finding it hard to say those three little words and it's a well-known fact that Tohru is clueless. So Yuki decides to give him a push. Literally. KyoxTohru
Author's Note: This story was written and is dedicated to my best friends, Lauren and Nicele. They're both Yuki lovers, but I forgive them anyway. And, hey, at least I didn't insult him too much in this. He helped!
Category: Romance, a bit of humor, lots of fluff. Also, definitely Kyo/Tohru. Can't help it. She loves the cat!
Spoilers: Um… As long as you know who Yuki, Shigure, Tohru, and Kagura are, then you're fine.
Feedback: Please.
Setting: The Sohma Household
Date Begun: October 26, 2004
Date Posted: October 26, 2004
Quietly awakening...
I always, always wish
That these fleeting thoughts
Would reach you...
"You are an idiot."
Kyo's eyebrow twitched as he looked over at the ladder to see none other than rat boy Yuki standing on it. He scowled and looked away. Yuki was the last person he wanted to see right now. Actually, Yuki was the last person he wanted to see. Period. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"How hard is it for you to say three little words? You seem to have no problem saying any other thing that comes to mind, but 'I love you, Tohru' is a real challenge for you, isn't it?"
"Shut up! You don't know anything, you damn rat." Kyo snapped, glaring. "What do you know? I didn't hear you spouting any confessions either, you girly—"
WHAM!
While Kyo nursed his now bruised chin, Yuki rubbed his fist and took a seat. "That is not the point. The point is, you and I both know that Tohru has feelings for you. I also happen to know that you feel for her as well. What I don't know is why you can't tell her that."
"As if it's that easy!" Kyo said angrily, turning his back to Yuki. "Not everybody can be like you and get down on their knees and say," He made his voice lower. " 'Miss Honda, I must admit, I find you to be absolutely beautiful and perfect in every way. Will you do me the honor of becoming my girlfriend?'. Besides, there's a whole bunch of problems."
"Like…?"
"Like the Sohma family curse for one! Why would she want to be with someone she can never hug? And Kagura for another! Not only will she beat me to death when she finds out, she might go after Tohru, too! Can't you understand that it's better for everybody if I just keep my mouth shut?!"
"Coward." That word alone was enough to stop Kyo's rant completely. His eyebrow twitched again and he slowly turned to face Yuki.
"What did you call me, rat boy?"
"I said that you are a coward. None of those things are reason enough for you to refused Miss Honda's affections. The real reason is… You're scared." Yuki said simply, a smirk making its way onto his face.
"I am not scared!"
"Prove it."
"I don't have to prove anything to you!"
"You're afraid. Just admit it."
"That's it! You and me! Right now! I'm going to smash that pretty boy face!" Kyo leaped to his feet, raising his fists. Sighing, Yuki got up as well.
Five seconds later, Kyo was flying off the roof and crashing into the ground outside the front door.
Tohru slid open the sliding door and looked at the crater just beyond the porch, from which a string of curses that would make a sailor blush were coming. She walked out onto the porch and sweat dropped.
"Kyo, have you and Yuki been fighting again?"
"WHAT DO YOU THINK?!" Kyo shouted as he sat up and brushed off his clothes and muttered under his breath. Tohru sweat dropped again, turning to look at Yuki who was waving at her from the roof.
"Good morning Miss Honda!"
"Good morning, Yuki." Tohru called back weakly, kneeling down next to Kyo. "Are you alright? Do you need some bandages or maybe some water? Or, I could draw you a bath or maybe get you some breakfast or—"
"I'm fine." Kyo said quietly. "One of these days…"
Tohru smiled. "I'm sure you'll beat him one day. Now come inside. I made you some rice balls. I'm sorry I didn't have time to make a proper breakfast. I got caught up in cleaning, but if you're really hungry—"
"It's fine." Kyo said again, standing up and not meeting her eyes. "Thanks."
"Oh, um, you're welcome…" Tohru watched him walk away and disappear into the house, a wistful expression on her face. Shaking her head, she hurried after him to finish her cleaning.
Yuki watched this all from the roof and frowned. "Stupid cat."
Unable to move forward across "just a little more" distance
The way I see before me is always blocked
Every time the days I want to see you but can't pile up,
My strong heartbeat turns into heartbreak.
Shigure Sohma wasn't stupid. He was well aware of the things going on in his house.
For instance, he knew that Yuki and Kyo were both in love with Tohru.
He knew that Tohru was in love with Kyo.
He also knew that Yuki was sick of Kyo avoiding it like the plague and was, at the sake of his own happiness, trying to give Kyo and Tohru a push in the right direction.
Oh yes, Shigure wasn't stupid at all. Which is why Yuki was employing his help.
"So… Let me get this straight. You want me, famous romance novelist, Shigure Sohma, to help you, Yuki Sohma, get the… Ah…"
"Crude? Brash? Loud?" Yuki offered.
"Precocious Kyo Sohma to admit his feelings for Tohru Honda?" Shigure asked with a raised eyebrow, rubbing his chin with his hand in his usual manner. Yuki nodded, although 'precocious' wasn't exactly the first word that popped into mind when he thought of Kyo.
Idiot was more like it.
"Mm, if you ask me, we should do what Kyoko Nakamura did in my latest novel." Shigure held up the book for Yuki to see. The violet-eyed boy sweat dropped.
"Which was…?"
"Lock Kyo and Tohru in a room together until we hear a confession… Or moaning…" Yuki's face turned a very bright red and he gave Shigure the Patented Yuki Sohma Evil Glare of Doom™.
"Can you be serious for one second and keep your indecent mind out of the gutter?!"
Shigure just laughed lightly. "Oh calm down, Yuki. I'm sure Kyo and Tohru can work it out on their own. All we need to do is give Kyo a little push."
"Define what you mean by 'A little'…"
If there is such a thing as "eternity,"
I want to believe, even if I have to take the long way.
Although I know that I've been hurt before because I'm clumsy
I won't stop; I won't give in to anyone.
Damn that rat for making me look stupid in front of Tohru, Kyo thought as he stomped through the halls of the Sohma house. He ignored the voice at the back of his head that said 'Oh, but you don't need Yuki for that'. Argh, I can't do anything right around her!
He walked into an empty bedroom and slid the door closed, sliding down the wall and burying his head in his hands. Stupid rat is right… Why can't I just tell her? What's wrong with me?
"Dammit. Stupid Yuki. Stupid Tohru. DAMMIT!"
"Ah… Um… Kyo…"
Kyo's head snapped up to see a very surprised and slightly sad looking Tohru standing in the doorway. He paled. She'd heard him? Tohru walked further into the room and bowed.
"Ah… I'm sorry. I don't know what I did to make you so upset, b-but…"
"You didn't do anything." Kyo told her, running his fingers through his hair. "What I mean is, it's not your fault. It's nothing."
"O-Oh, well… Is there a reason why you're in my room."
Kyo looked up and then looked around. He hadn't noticed that he was in Tohru's room. Tensing, he rapidly shook his head, cat ears growing out of his hair. "Nothing! Nothing at all! I just wanted to be alone, that's all!"
"…I could leave…"
"You don't have to."
"Alright."
They stared at each other in silence until they heard something moving around outside and there was a loud thump of something heavy being placed somewhere before silence.
Kyo raised an eyebrow and got up, walking over to the door and trying to slide it open.
The key word: Trying.
"WHAT THE HELL?! YUKI!!!"
"Yes, Kyo?"
"FUCKING HELL! GET THIS GODDAMN THING OUT OF THE WAY!!!"
"Sorry, but we can't do that."
"SHIGURE?! YOU'RE IN ON THIS TOO? WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!"
"This is for the good of you and Tohru, Kyo. Now stay in there and be a good boy. The sooner you confess, the sooner we'll let you out."
"SHIGURE, WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! LET US OUT OF HERE!"
There was no answer.
Kyo growled under his breath and started to attack the giant piece of furniture, making dents in the back but doing nothing towards getting it out of the way. Finally, he gave up and dropped to the floor, glaring and muttering curses.
"Well… I suppose while we're in here, we could play a game…" Tohru said, holding up her pack of cards. Kyo jumped. He'd almost forgotten she was in there with him. He started to get more and more nervous. Yuki and Shigure had made it very clear that they weren't getting out until Kyo confessed.
Problem was: How was he supposed to work up the courage to do so?
Maybe Yuki had been right. He was a coward.
"Ha! That rat being right? Oh please!" Kyo said, unintentionally out loud. Tohru paused in shuffling.
"Uh, what?"
"Nothing... Nothing… So, we're playing Rich Man, Poor Man, right? I'm gonna beat you!"
"I'll still try my best anyway!"
They played five games, Kyo winning three of them, then letting Tohru win the last two, before they got bored and just sat still. Kyo was still sitting in front of the door and Tohru was sitting in front of them, restlessly shuffling the deck.
"Kyo…"
"Mhmm?"
"What is it… What is it that Yuki wants you to tell me?"
Kyo's face slowly started turning red again and he turned away. "NOTHING!"
"But… Wouldn't it be better to just say it? I mean, so you don't have to be stuck in here with me anymore? I know it's not very exciting…"
"Don't say that. I don't mind." Kyo said, looking over at her. Tohru looked surprised a moment, then smiled and looked away, playing with the ends of her skirt.
"Alright. You don't have to tell me. I just didn't want you to be uncomfortable."I think of you
And that alone is enough
To make the tears start to flow now
I always, always wish
That these fleeting thoughts
Would reach you...
"Can you hear anything?" Yuki asked Shigure, who had his ear pressed against the chester, trying to hear what was going on inside Tohru's bedroom.
"They've finally stopped playing card games, but Kyo is still being stubborn." Shigure answered, shaking his head. "They'll be in there all day. All week even."
"Why is he so stupid? Looks like he's going to need extra help."
"I know, I know!" Shigure said in a sing-songy voice, holding up his novel. "We can do this!"
"…'His breath was coming out in short pants as he'—"
"Not that part!"
"—'Kyoko shut off the electricity, leaving the couple in darkness. Rei got scared, asking Hito if she could cuddle into his arms and if he would protect her from the darkness.'?"
"Exactly."
"You do realize, of course, that Kyo would have to be heavily intoxicated before he agreed to let anyone 'cuddle into his arms'."
"It's worth a shot."
I've known all too well about pretending to be strong.
But since then, my doubts have vanished.
Kyo and Tohru were still staring at each other in silence when the lights shut off.
Kyo looked up at the ceiling, then at Tohru when she squeaked. "…You okay?"
"Heh… Yes. I just, um, don't like the dark." Tohru said sheepishly, scratching the back of her head though Kyo couldn't see it. "I'm fine."
"There's nothing to worry about. Anything hiding in the dark wouldn't dare challenge me."
Tohru laughed weakly. "Right. Sorry."
There was a pause in which Kyo stared out to the spot where he imagined Tohru to be. "You can… Come sit over here… If you like…"
"Really? Thank you!" Tohru crawled to the other side of the room and sat next to Kyo, pulling her knees up to her chest and trying not to get even more scared. Kyo's face was bright red again and he was thankful for the darkness that his blush.
But when Tohru's head fell against his shoulder, his face flamed.
"Okay, now you're getting way too close for comfort!" He shouted, trying to get his face to stop being so red. Tohru removed her head immediately.
"I-I'm sorry. I just… It's so dark…"
Kyo averted his eyes. "Fine. You can put your head back down. I don't care."
"Thank you, Kyo." Tohru said softly, resting her head on his shoulder again. Kyo gulped and continued looking away while Tohru squirmed to make herself more comfortable. "Kyo…?"
"What?"
"Are you ever going to tell me whatever it is Yuki wants you to tell me?"
"…Some day. Maybe."
"You know… Whenever there was a blackout, Mom and I always used to tell each other things. Just anything. About our day or sometimes Mom would tell me about the times before I was born or… Just anything. We could do that to pass the time." Tohru suggested in a cheerful voice. Or as cheerful as she could get considering she was extremely scared.
"Uh, sure, I guess. Whatever. So talk then."
"Okay! Well, today, while you and Yuki were fighting, I was cleaning the living room and I found this really huge dust bunny. It even looked like a dust bunny too! I named it Little Kyo… But then I had to vacuum it up. I was sad."
Kyo blinked.
Then he broke out laughing.
"You named… A dust bunny… After me?"
"…It was a cute dust bunny." Tohru defended in embarrassment. Kyo continued laughing.
"So, what, you named it after me because you think I'm cute?" He asked, trying to control his laughing fit.
"Well… Yeah…"
Kyo stopped laughing. He turned a very bright red.
There was a long moment of silence before Tohru broke it. "Your turn. Tell me something. Anything."
"I can't think of anything."
"Oh, Mom and I did something for this too! I'll say something and you tell me how hearing that makes you feel." Kyo gave her an even look, but, of course, Tohru couldn't see it in the dark. "Ready? Okay. Yuki."
"Grr… Why do you have to bring up that pretty boy?" Kyo snapped angrily. "I can't stand him! Walking around all high and mighty. He's so fucking perfect and everybody loves him! He doesn't even have to try to get what he wants, and he gets everything! So... Fucking… Annoying…"
He blinked as he realized Tohru was giggling. "What's so funny?"
"Nothing. It's just… You and Yuki don't even realize…"
"Realize what?"
"Yuki envies you, too, you know."
Kyo stared. "What are you on about?"
"Yuki told me once why he thought you were so stupid. And you told me why you think he's stupid. I think… If you guys would just sit down and talk instead of fighting… Then you'd be great friends."
"It's not that simple, Tohru. Rat boy and I will never be friends. We're too different. He's the golden boy that everybody loves and I'm… Well, I'm the outcast of the zodiac. It's always been that way. And until I can beat Yuki, it'll always be that way. Of course, the rat can beat me when he's half-asleep so I don't think that'll happen any time soon…"
Tohru smiled. "I don't think it's important to be loved by everybody. As long as the people you care about care about you right back, then that's all that really matters."
Kyo was silent for a few moments before he sighed. "Yeah. Now if only I could actually admit to those people that I care about them. I've been keeping my real feelings inside for so long, I think I've forgotten how."
There's definitely things I want to show you
And so many words I want to hear
I want to see all sides of you, when you laugh and cry
So I'll stop waiting
And seize my "chance."
Tohru looked at him. "Well… Who do you want to let know that you care, Kyo? Maybe I can help you."
Kyo ran his fingers through his hair. "Ah… I don't know… I mean… It's…"
Pause.
"WHY ARE WE EVEN TALKING ABOUT THIS?! THIS IS STUPID!" He snapped, jumping up and clenching his fists. Those two cat ears grew out of his hair again "I don't want to talk about this anymore!"
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to make you angry! I was just trying to help!" Tohru said, getting up as well and looking at hi. "Please don't get angry, Kyo, I – Whoa!"
"Tohru, don't--!"
POP!
"Whoops…"
"Dammit… Dammit… Dammit…" Kyo, now back to his orange cat form, twitched as Tohru folded up his clothes and placed him in her lap, a vein popping out of his head. "Dammit."
"I'm so sorry, Kyo! I just didn't want you to be angry with me…"
"I'm not angry!"
"Sorry." Tohru looked down, trying not to cry. Kyo's tail twitched before he sighed heavily.
"Listen. I didn't mean to get mad at you… I just… I mean… I'm having trouble… I wanted to tell you…""What is it?"
"I'm… I mean, I… What I'm trying to say is I… Man, why can't I just… Dammit…"
Tohru watched him blankly, wondering what on earth he was trying to tell her. Kyo was really struggling with this, trying to push those three little words past his lips.
Trying…
Trying…
Trying…
"Tohru…"
POP!
"Eek!"
"Damn. Just hand me my clothes."
I think of you,
And I feel like that alone is enough
To make my heart grow stronger.
I always, always wish
That these fleeting thoughts
Would reach you...
"Ooooh, so close!" Shigure whined. Yuki sighed in frustration.
"This is impossible. He takes too long. It's not that hard to say, is it?"
Shigure shrugged. "Might be for him. Hito had the hardest time telling Rei that he was madly in love with her and wanted to take her on the floor of the bedroom. Maybe once in the bed. And twice up against the wall. And—"
"Thank you for that lovely image."
"Your welcome. There's nothing else we can do. After the black out, Hit struggled for another five pages to tell Rei how much he loved her, but it happened in the end. THEN he took her on the floor, and once in the bed, and twice—"
"Okay. Stop."
I think of you
And that alone is enough
To make the tears start to flow now
My distant voice can't reach you now, but so that someday
It definitely will...
"Sorry for hugging you and turning you into a cat, Kyo." Tohru said sheepishly once Kyo had gotten dressed and was now sitting cross-legged in front of her with his back to her.
"It's alright. It's not your fault. It always happens, eventually." Kyo brought his knee up to his chest and wrapped his arm around it, scowling at nothing. He'd come so close, but then he had to retransform…
Damn.
"Kyo?"
"What?"
"What were you trying to tell me before?" Tohru asked softly, looking at him. Kyo tensed up, glaring down at the ground.
"It was nothing. Just…"
"Yeah?"
"I… Tohru I…" He clenched his fist and tried to force the words out. "I really… I mean… You're… And I just… I… DAMMIT TOHRU, I LOVE YOU OKAY?! Are you fucking happy now?!"
Tohru gasped, staring at him wide-eyed as, 'miraculously', the lights finally came on at last and she could see a very red faced Kyo, staring at the ground between them.
"That's what I wanted to tell you. That I… I'm in love with… You."
A smile crossed Tohru's face and she tilted her head to the side, crawling over to Kyo and dipping her head so that he was staring straight at her. "I love you, too, Kyo. I've always loved the cat… And you're even better!"
Kyo blushed even more, looking at her before he smiled awkwardly. "Thanks."
They just stayed looking at each other for a moment before Kyo sucked in his breath and started to move closer to Tohru, closer and closer until their lips were centimeters apart…
"Where's that rumbling sound coming from?" Came Shigure's voice from outside the door.
"Oh no. Not now." Yuki's voice joined in.
Kyo groaned. "It's—"
"KYOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" The dresser in front of the door cracked in two and the pieces fell into the room as Kagura came flying inside and jumped Kyo, showing her love by twisting him over her head. "KYO I MISSED YOU SO MUCH! DID YOU MISS ME? I MISSED YOU!!"
Tohru just laughed while Yuki and Shigure peeked their heads inside and sweat dropped. She stood up, smiling at them and bowing. "Thank you."
"Anything for you, Miss Honda." Yuki said, smiling back.
"And besides, it was fun hearing Kyo get so flustered." Shigure added with a laugh. Tohru smiled softly over at the redheaded boy who was currently getting the crap beat out of him by his overenthusiastic cousin.
I wonder… If Kagura had come just a little bit later…
"Well, anyone up for dinner?" Shigure asked.
"Oh no! That's right! I was supposed to make dinner!" Tohru said, slipping on her slippers and hurrying out of the room. "It'll be ready soon, just hold on!"
She smiled again as she ran down to the kitchen.
If Kagura had come just a little bit later… Would I have really gotten my first kiss?
"Someday. Maybe." She said, echoing Kyo's words from earlier before going to prepare dinner for the Sohmas.
Believe. la la la la la la...
Believe. la la la la la la...
Believe. la la la la la la...
The End