I hate you. I hate you, Harry. Why have you made me so sad? Why would you do that? We're supposed to be friends. Well, we were. Once upon a time. That seems so distant now. What happened to once upon a time? Where have all the happy endings gone?

When I was a child, I believe them. I believed one day I'd find my prince. I believed one day my world would be complete. I'd find my soulmate as it were. I never imagined life would be so harsh. So cold.

And I didn't have an easy life, Harry. I was the odd one out as a Muggle. I was too smart, too in-your-face, too bossy, for anyone to really like me. Nobody bothered to get to know me, because I was your typical odd ball. It didn't help that every now and then I blew up the odd glass.

You were my prince then, though, Harry. My first real friend. You, and then Ron. Ron followed whatever you did. You needed me. Needed my brains. But I didn't care. For the first time in my life, I felt included.

What happened to you, Harry? What has made you change? What has changed you so much, to do such a thing? I don't understand, Harry. Help me to understand. But I don't even know where you are now. I don't know what's going on in your life. Something happened in the summer of fifth year. Sirius died but I thought you'd be okay, Harry. I thought you were dealing. But apparently not.

Where are you? Don't you know I'd fret? Don't you know the pain you'd put Ron and me through, if you suddenly disappeared after doing such a deed? It's so unlike you, Harry. So unlike Harry Potter.

I hate you at the moment. I really do. I've thought about it so long. For so long now. But it's only been a week. A week! But I haven't slept at all. I've just stared at the ceiling, wondering without any answers. Every night, Harry. Just about you.

How could you do it? Actually, how did you do it? Did you choke him? Did you attack him, bang his head too hard off the tile floor? Or did you use the cowardly way, the magic way? Did you mean to do it? Had you planned it, up in that little box room they gave you? Or was it an accident, a sudden bout of rage, out of control?

The unanswered questions are killing me. You must know how much they kill me. Why have you done this?

"He's missing, Miss Granger, and we can't find him. Do you have any idea where he'd be? No... that's okay. Miss Granger, are you alright? I know, it's a big shock and I'm afraid I have to bestow another one on you. Harry, Harry killed his uncle, Mr Vernon Dursley, on Tuesday. Miss Granger, stop! Calm down! Yes, I'm afraid there's no question of it. I wish there was."

Merlin, Harry, how could you do it? You're the nicest person I know. Well, actually, that's not all true. You'd been terribly rude and quite moody last year, but you're not a murderer. Never a murderer!

I snap out of my thoughts. Ginny walks in and I stare at her, wanting her to suddenly go away. It's been one week since I heard the news form Dumbledore and I've been as uncommunicative to anybody as I could, without completely ignoring them.

"Hermione," she says, "we're worried about you."

"There's no need to be. I'm fine. Is it nearly time for class?"

"Yeah." She looks me over. "You look horrible."

I know I do. I don't have any snappy come back. Should I? Should I be normal by now? Should I be acting as if Harry's never existed?

In class I sit, with books spread out in front of me. I can't get behind in my classes. Not in sixth year. I can't let myself slip. Because if I do, then nothing will be the same. If I let myself slip, then I won't really know who I am anymore.

Ron's beside me. Doodling. Talking to Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnegan. Not paying the least bit of attention. Does he think the same as me? Does he agree we have to keep normal? We have to keep up this bravado? Or maybe he's just in shock? Maybe he just can't believe it? I wouldn't know. I haven't talked to him about it. I haven't talked to him about anything. I'm avoiding and I think he might be avoiding me.

Snape is at the top of the class, lecturing. He hasn't said one thing to the Gryffindors yet. His eyes roam over Harry's empty seat. Why hasn't he made a sneering remark? Why haven't we lost any points yet? What's going on?

Things are changing and I can't keep up.

But I can hear the Slytherins, on the other side of the room. I can hear them all hissing and giggling, sneering and laughing, their faces full of distain, and their wicked eyes gleaming with glee. I can hear Pansy Parkinson hissing over at me, "Hey Granger, missing your boyfriend yet?" and Draco Malfoy's loud voice sneering, "I wonder if Potty's gotten himself blown up or perhaps he's fell of his broom and burst that over-sized head of his." They don't know about Harry's uncle's demise but they will soon. Nothing stays a secret in this school.

Some things never change.

I can't take it anymore. I put up my hand and ask for leave. Snape looks at me, critically, and I think maybe I've pushed his "kindness" too far. But he nods coldly and lets me go. I get up, aware of the eyes on me, and walk quickly to the door, my footsteps clanging loudly against the stone floor. I feel like I can't breathe. I rip open the door and step out, closing it as quietly and un-dramatically as possible.

This is my life, Harry. Okay, it's never been mundane. But now it's too much. Look at what you've done? How could you do this to me?

I hate you, Harry.

Because you're my best and only friend, and I don't think I can go on without you.

Okay, it's the start of a story. I'm not too sure if I'm going to continue it or not, just yet. I know it seems like a Harry/Hermione story at the moment, but, if I continue this, there's going to Ron/Hermione action and definite Draco/Hermione. Hermione's going to get a bit confused and etc. I don't know. No definite plans. Please review and tell me if I should continue this or maybe just leave it as a shoddy one-shot.

Thanks. Reviews really rock! So, er, be a rock star! X