A/N: I do not own the characters, and if you like it, review...I'm not so sure about it.
I have never been known as a decent man, and through my childhood and teenage years, I was never known as a decent child. Perhaps I helped in portraying the arrogant, selfish image that now haunts me today with my foolish actions and childish pride. Yet kids always do crazy things, and in that sense, I am no less human than you. I will admit that I degraded others, judged unfairly, mocked, cheated, and pushed away any hopes of forming friendships with the type of people who encourage you to do better, to live better, and to smile. I am not the person I used to be, and I was never the person people believed I would become. I never delved into the trifle matters of the opinions people had for me, yet I will admit that they hurt. I never listened to the insults which were truths hidden behind hostile lips, and perhaps I should have, perhaps people would see I am a different man who has many flaws, just like you.
I am a twenty-something business-man, and for those who see people by labels, I am wealthy. Stated simply and with a hint of arrogance, but it is what I am. I am from old money, but I have worked hard for the money I have now. Nothing major occurred in my life to force me to understand the value of a galleon, and even though I mocked families for their low class standard, I admire the "poor-working" families. I have seen the people they are, the parents they are, the leaders they are, and I have seen their children; children who know the wealth of life, of a heart, of values, and of money and in that retrospect, they are wealthier than I shall ever be.
To be blunt, I had an epiphany today. I was walking through the streets of a nearby town, and I had no one by my side. The matter of my loneliness has never struck me as odd until then. While watching two friends laughing heartily and smiling, and a young couple kiss, I felt nothing but dejection. In my years since graduation, I locked myself away, working and trying to prove my own worth was not based on "daddy's wealth."
Speaking of my father, he died two months ago, in Azkaban, where everyone wanted to see him rot. I never liked the man to be honest, but as any child does, I loved him. Until Voldermort rose to his greatest height, he always looked at me with cold admiration, but once my motives shifted, I became a disappointment to him and the integrity of the "honorable" family name. Even now I see nothing honorable about out family. Cold and selfish, calculating and wasteful, my father did whatever and used whomever to gain influence over a seemingly kind a very naïve society. Me? A disappointment? Even now I am ashamed that I once looked at him with respect. I visited him of course, but the meetings were stiff, and it was blatant that I neither wanted to be there, and he most certainly wanted me to be gone. He even stated it at our final meeting, "Be gone. You are not the man I wanted you to be, and you have failed. Leave me to my own thoughts, and take your pious arse out." That was the only incentive I needed.
I have found over the years that there are only two things in life that really matter. Who you are, and who you could be. These lessons are of course, as any lesson is, taken in with any cup of tea. I am ashamed to say that it took me as long as it did to realize that the life I had been living would seal my fate all too soon, and frankly, as lonely as I am, I like living. Not that living was the only reason I changed. No, I changed for many reasons that I would rather not disclose to a society that already hates and fears me. Hate and fear two unceremonious feelings that feed of each other greedily. You fear what you hate, and you hate that you fear it. That made sense in my mind at least. At this point in life I have come to the conclusion that things will not change for me. People will never open up to me like I want, and I guess I have done so well pretending of being a cold man that I can do it for the rest of my life, however long that maybe.
Ginny Weasley walked into a coffee shop that Draco had left only moments before. Ordering her usual "skinny latte" she went to the back and sat in her usual spot. A suede covered sofa with a coffee table in front. Pulling out her notebook, she sat back and placed her knee up to create a top as she began to write. Nothing people would see, just words of her own delight. She stopped for a moment and tapped her lip lightly as she looked around. It was then that she noticed the black leather-bound book. Surprised by it, she opened the book to the first and only written page. As she read the eloquent writing, she empathized for the man who had been so wrongly portrayed, and at his sense of denied worth. As a Weasley, she felt the same restrictions of a society that expected you to be something based on family actions that had never attributed to personal beliefs.
Ginny spent an hour reading and rereading the work, and every time she was left astounded by the blatant honesty of the man's work. He was a gifted writer, but Ginny was dubious that he made a career of it. Being a writer herself, she knew it was hard to write and be wealthy. Unless you wrote what society demanded, it was unlikely a knut was sent your way. Ginny never complained though. She was happy. Sure she never ate at Marquese's, or shopped at the designer shops, but she never felt restricted of those things. To say she was un-materialistic would be false, like any human, she felt importance with some things, but she never went far with that ideal. Suddenly inspired, Ginny opened up to a blank page after the entry and began to write.
Dear...
Pathetic as it is, I fear I do not know your name, but I know you. Ashamedly, I read your...journal? I suppose that fits. A diary is a silly venting resource for teenage girls who have little to say but exaggerate anyhow. I know you though, perhaps not in physical eye to eye contact, but I know you.
You see, you are the male equivalent of me. Not in the ways of personal dealings, I am sorry for your father's death even if you are not, but in the views we share. I too feel alone, and living in a world that demotes an unmarried woman as an undignified source of waste, I have come to the conclusion that I would rather be alone then spend my life forced to the arm of an unhappy relationship. I have friends, but I have no confidants. My family listens, but they do not hear me. I am constantly surrounded by people, and yet I feel that no one is there. Being a businessman, I know you understand that feeling.
In all honesty, I have reached the end of the journey between who I am and who I could be, and I have not faltered in that. Society sees me as a poor woman with no job, no aspirations, and as you stated you were, a disappointment to an honorable family. My family has never been known for wealth, quite the opposite really. Yet we have always been known as hardworking, ethical people. This is where I become the disappointment, not on my ethics, but on my "hardworking abilities." I am a writer. I am not a journalist, but I write novels. Maybe you have read them, maybe not, but seeing as how you left your identity a secret, I will follow in that same manner, despite the fact that it would be free publicity.
I do not know what you look like, whether you are deformed or beautiful to the touch, but I do know this. You are a decent man, despite what society as labeled you. So in my only disagreement I urge you to not give up that hope. It is not a false hope to dream that one day people will see the real you. I have been given a small glimpse, and one day someone else will want one too.
Ginny closed the book and ran her fingers over the cover. Hugging it to her chest for a moment, she then returned it to its spot. Closing her notebook, Ginny placed her notebook in her bag and headed for the door. As she walked through the entrance she bumped into a man who was dressed exquisitely. They both apologized at the same time, leaving Ginny laughing slightly. Finally she looked up at took an involuntary step back. Hello Draco Malfoy!
Ginny quickly fled from the entrance with assured promises that "Yes I'm alright. No, no permanent damage has been done." Memories of Hogwarts filled her mind, and as selfish as the grudge was, Ginny still felt slightly bitter after all the years of relentless teasing he had imposed upon her and her brother. And after all the torture Lucius put on her father, the snotty attitudes and the glares that left ice shivering. Yet, when she had looked into his grey eyes, she had seen something in them. No longer cold, or mocking, just...surviving. There was no mistake in his looks. He had grown even taller, reaching the height of 6'3, he seemed to be built by the way his grey dress shirt stretched over his back, and his chiseled jaw was enough to make her knees shake. Ginny shook her head furiously. Knees knocking? Not only that, knees shaking because of Malfoy? The Malfoy! The heinous, narcissistic, backstabbing jerk? Ginny sighed; she realized that she would most likely never see him again. She only hoped that the sudden feeling was of relief, and not of disappointment.
Draco watched the retreating figure of Ginny in wonder, her laughter still sang in his ears. She had become a beautiful woman. Not flashy or grand, but classically so. Long wavy red hair that was tied back with a black ribbon, eyeliner and mascara on her eyes and natural lip gloss seemed to be the only makeup she wore. In place of a skirt, she wore tan pants and a brown sweater. Nothing fancy, just natural. He saw the disgust and fear in her eyes when she had looked up at him, and Draco's shoulders dropped. Another opportunity lost to the wind because of stupid childhood acts. Rubbing the nape of his neck, Draco walked further into the store and into the back. He searched around for the leather book he had left in his wake and he finally retrieved it from the coffee table. Sighing gratefully, he opened the book and flipped through the few written pages, as he was about to close it though, he found the letter written to him. He sat down on the couch to read the letter, and as he finished, he smiled. Picking up a quill, he decided to respond.
Hello,
I really wish you would have left your name in response, for the letter you have written me has raised my spirits greatly. To realize that I am not the only one battling with said emotions relieves me to a tremendous extent.
You said you know me, yet you have left little to allow me to know you. And honestly, I do not think I wish to know you if you're the female equivalent of me. (A little humor, please take no offense). I would love deeply to meet you, yet that decision is yours. In the event that a chance meeting shall never happen, I will explain myself in direct terms.
I am a twenty-six year old CEO of a company in which I really don't know anything about. I live alone, surprise surprise, due to the reasons of an absent family. I said my father died, that is true, but my mother, who was a very beautiful spirit, died two years ago in the raid to capture my father. As much as I would like to hold a grudge, I have realized it was simply a horrible mistake. I have a slight, well rather large, passion for Quidditch. I was the seeker on my house team at the school I attended, although I daresay I was not that good. If it weren't for my father, I would ask how I ever became capitan. Yet a man never has to be good at the sport he loves.
I could tell by your handwriting that you were a writer, I do not know what it is exactly that gave it away, but you have a very eloquent voice. I hope I have made no mistake in pursuing this...uncommon relationship, but I have a very firm belief in following a grand thing when it comes my way.
-As Insanely cliché as it is, Anonymous
Draco finished his entry and smiled something he did not do often. He closed the book and placed it back on the coffee table and left the shop as soon as he had come with promises of returning the following day.
The pages of the journal quickly filled as the days and weeks passed. The relationship between the two unknown peoples had grown incredibly intimate, yet neither one had taken any further steps to engage in a physical meeting. However, as personal and telling as the journal had become, it was no longer enough, for either of them. It was Draco however, that finally took the first step. Ginny entered the shop and went straight to the back as she accustomly did. She sat down and folded her legs beneath her and opened the journal. Flipping through the crisp written pages, she came to "Anonymous last entry" anticipating another telling entry; she was surprised by the shortness of it. It simple read:
"When can I meet you?"
It was at that moment that Ginny finally realized why she had never asked for a meeting herself. The thought of meeting this man frightened her. He had written numerous times that she was special to him, and a friend, but those reassuring words did nothing to discourage the overwhelming fear. For once in her life, it mattered if she disappointed someone, it mattered if she disappointed the man whose name she still did not know. Yet feeling the importance of this to him, she replied:
"Tomorrow, at noon."
Closing the book, she hurried from the store, fearing that he would walk into the shop at any moment, not that she would know him if he did.
Draco did indeed return to the shop later that day. He opened the journal and was surprised that she had actually agreed to a meeting. It was a big leap for him, but he was willing to put everything out on the line if he was able to meet her. He picked up the journal and took it with him. As he left the shop, he waved and winked to the woman behind the counter, who only looked at him in shock.
The following day, Ginny was in a rush. Butterflies seemed to be producing at a vast amount in her stomach. As the time approached, Ginny left the apartment and decided to walk to the shop. Humming softly to herself, she pushed her hair behind her ears compulsively every three seconds, a habit she preformed whenever she was nervous. As she was walking, she ran once again into Draco Malfoy. Laughing timidly she apologized but Draco only looked at her.
"Where are you going?" He asked.
"The coffee shop down the street." Ginny returned.
"Me as well."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"What a coincidence." Ginny stated.
"Life's full of them. Walk with me?" Ginny looked at him uncertainly. "Please?" He slightly begged.
Ginny shrugged her shoulders. "Alright." The two walked in silence to the store, and to Ginny's disappointment, the book was gone.
"Looking for someone?" He inquired.
"No, I guess not." Ginny concluded. "Why? Are you?"
"You could say that." Draco said nonchalantly.
"A girl perhaps?"
"An amazing one at that." Draco breathed.
"She must be special."
"Oh she is."
"What's her name?" Ginny inquired. Draco looked at her in astonishment, and then it hit him. She really did not know that it was him that had been writing in the journal! Inhaling deeply, he thought of a way to tell her.
"Follow me." He urged. Ginny looked at him curiously, but acquiesced. As she sat down on her couch, Draco produced the journal. Ginny looked at him in shock.
"How did you get that?" She demanded.
"It's mine." Draco whispered.
"Yeah right."
"Ginny..." Draco began and ended. He realized he would have to prove it to her. He flipped over the book and waved his wand over the back. In gold letters appeared the name Draco Malfoy. Ginny swallowed.
"I...I don't understand." She whispered.
"It's me." He whispered.
"Obviously." She breathed, still looking at the journal. Finally she looked at him. "What do we do now?"
"It's a choice really. Do you want me, or do you not?" Draco responded.
"It's not as simple as that. I mean we have a history, and it isn't a very a good one."
Draco closed his eyes tightly. "Ginerva Weasley. I have done horrible things in my past, things I will never be able to atone for. I cannot fix the past no...no matter how I wish I could. I have gotten to know you, and I have grown to care for you. I do not know love, I have never experienced it, but I do know that I were to love, you would be the only one I could love. I will not ask you to forget the past, but I will beg on my knees to have a future with you. So I ask you once more, do you want me, or do you not?" Draco said as he crouched down in front of her. Ginny looked down into his eyes and smiled softly. She caressed his hair for a moment, and then her hand fell to cup his chin. Pulling his face forward she stared into his eyes. Draco relished the moment.
"Draco Malfoy. I will be the first to tell you that you were a prick at school, but you have proved to me that you are no longer whom you used to be. I told you in the first entry that I knew you, and that has not changed. I also told you that you were a decent man, another thing that has not changed. So in answer to your question. Yes, I want you." Draco beamed. Pulling himself up to her face he smiled at her and Ginny diverted her eyes as she blushed. Draco laughed at her, and Ginny returned her eyes to him and smiled shyly. Draco then did the first thing he had wanted to do in a very long time. He kissed Ginny with all of him.
A/N: Okay, don't know why I wrote that, but I have been getting reviews for "When they were seventh years" and "A simple fairy tale" they rock, so here's a treat. If you like this, try my Harry/Ginny one-shot "Had to Let Go." And as my usual request goes...Review!