Ever have a scene that just won't escape your mind? However, you are all like "Nooo! I need to finish my 10 page paper by midnight! I won't make it in time!" And your muse is like "Buahahaahaaha!! Suffer mortal! For I shall drive you mad unless you do my bidding!"

No?

Oh...

Enjoy anyway though. ;;

Naruto and your soul belongs to Masashi Kishimoto... accept no substitutions.

--

Meetings in a spring, (or "Sometimes it's best not to ask...")
By Lizmun.

He hurt. Oh Kami, did he hurt. From his sluggish and bruised feet, to the calloused and blood-drawn fingertips, to the droopy whiskers on his face, the slightest movement caused his young and usually energized self such agonizing pain.

Damn Ero-sennin...

Turning his sore and slightly stiff neck to peer over slouched shoulders, Naruto directed a smoldering glare that just screamed out his furry at the white-haired bastard. Okay, so maybe it wasn't that intense, he was practically zombie-like from exhaustion after all. Perhaps the look could be best described as a "you don't make me happy", half-lidded glazed look. Still, it did convey his dislike to the pervert.

Jiraiya raised a tired brow at the pouting boy before him. They had been training rigorously for a week, trying to strengthen their skills for the upcoming Chuunin exams. In fact, the boy's current predicament was his own fault. Today, desperate to fulfill as much training as he could on his last day, Naruto had been insistent that they doubled their training to make up for time lost while trying to retrieve that Uchiha kid a few months back.

If that was what the boy considered "time lost training", the Sannin was curious to know what was considered productive.

Still, the week was over and it had been time to head back to the village. Tsunade had been adamant that Naruto return immediately to help his team, along with the other Gennin to complete some missions to help out in the village. What could he do but follow orders, right? It wouldn't do well for his health to make the new "hokage" pissed, now would it... plus with the brat gone, Jiraiya figured he would have more time to further his research! He was overdue for the next part of his series after all.

Naruto looked up at the Ero-sannin and wrinkled his nose in disgust at the goofy-looking smirk on the old man's face. Grumbling something about "white-haired perverts," Naruto was about to turn around and kick the elder's shin for thinking those kind of thoughts in his presence when a voice cut through his own musings.

"Naruto!"

Both sensei and student glanced up as brown-haired man slowly approached them, his hand up in a brief wave of greeting. Instantly recognizing the man as his old sensei, Naruto gave a goofy grin of his own and ran up to pounce at the scarred-nose man.

"Iruka-sensei!"

Landing in an unrefined heap, the Chuunin teacher gave a mock-growl and began to yell out protests of the boy's behavior while at the same time trying to push his ex-student off of his person. Naruto didn't care, in fact he hugged his ex-teacher tighter in response. This action rewarded the boy with a few more curses and a light bop to the head. It was all in fun after all. Iruka's aura wasn't malicious or dark like the others who yelled at him, his was lighter and gave Naruto a fuzzy feeling. In addition to that, Naruto could easily pick out the humor in the scowling Chuunin's brown eyes, along with the hint of a smile in that snarl.

Iruka-sensei was just so much fun to annoy anyway.

After finally managing to stand, while all the while still having the boy's arms wrapped around his middle, (a pretty remarkable feat if one may say), Iruka turned to apologize to their white-haired observer when upon recognizing the man, Iruka's body stiffened in slight shock.

The older man observed the younger man's expression briefly and simply closed his eyes and smirked, but only before he leapt back and pulled out a paper fan for each hand and posed dramatically before the pair.

"Ah! I can tell you recognized me! And who wouldn't! My name is known throughout this land for my works and my great deeds! Be humbled! For you now stand in the presence of..."

"I remember you Jiraiya-san, and frankly, I was quite happy having had forgotten about our first encounter, thank-you-very-much..."

Naruto couldn't help but gape slightly in shock at the strained and harsh tone of his former teacher's voice. He had felt Iruka's demeanor change and Naruto slacked in his grip slightly to give a curious stare at Iruka, and then shifted his stare to the ero-sennin

"Anou-sa... anou-sa... Iruka-sensei? You know this pervert?"

To say that Naruto was disappointed, would be an understatement. He had thought better of Iruka-sensei, now to find out that he was quite familiar with the king of all perverts? Well, Naruto supposed, it did explain the huge nosebleed Iruka gave him when he first demonstrated his "Oiroke no jutsu", but he had thought all adults reacted that way. How troublesome.

Jiraiya simply blinked in slight confusion at the smoldering man before him. He did not recall meeting this person before... at least, he didn't remember... yet something about that scar did have a slight familiarity to him. Usually, when the Sannin was recognized, he was often greeted with words of praise, either at his skill as a great ninja or, more than not, for his written works. Usually the white-haired man got this type of reactions by some of the more uptight females, especially after.... Oh.... Now he remembered.

With slight amusement, Naruto watched as Jiraiya's expression shifted from curiosity, to recognition then immediately to an expression that was a mix of revulsion yet fond humor. What disturbed Naruto a bit was when Jiraiya reached up to sheepishly scratch the nape of his neck, all the while chuckling nervously.

"Ah! Iruka-san! Hahah! It's been a while!"

"Please," Iruka cut in again, causing Naruto to gape a bit more. It was just so out of character for his nice, overly-polite ex-teacher to act to rude, even if the Ero-Sannin deserved it. "If you do not mind, Jiraiya-san, I really wish you wouldn't address me so informally. Umino would be fine."

"Oh come now! You're still not holding a grudge about that, are you? It was only a joke!"

The look Iruka gave the other man felt like it could freeze fire instantly. Still, Naruto couldn't help but raise a notch up in respect to the white-haired pervert when the Sannin simply shuddered slightly then gave a brief cough to dispel his discomfort. Looking away from the cold glare, Jiraiya' still gave a slight smirk to the brown-haired man.

"WOULD SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT IS GOING ON? How do you two know each other?"

Distracting away from each other, both adults paused in their silent banter to glance down at the highly-agitated ball of yellow and orange before them. Naruto's curiosity had long kicked into overdrive, and it didn't take much for his frustration to burst out from all the secretive and insinuating conversation between the two adults.

Iruka began to turn a slight pink around the cheeks as he realized he had disregarded Naruto's presence after seeing Jiraiya. What was worse was that Naruto had now gotten dangerously curious about the Sannin's and his first encounter. Like Hell, was Iruka going to inform him though.

Jiraiya, however, was quite the opposite. He had shrugged off the fact that he ignored Naruto for that brief moment, and, judging from the smirk on his face, Iruka could tell that the older man didn't have any qualms with enlightening his student of their past.

"Well, you see Naruto, it was several years ago..."

--

The weather was growing a bit colder as the days went past. Winter's morning breath stung at those who foolishly left exposed skin, having not prepared themselves for the upcoming season. Although the thin, grey clouds covered the sky, dulling memories of times of blue and warmer afternoons, it was a fairly beautiful, November day. It was wonderful time to warm up either with a good book and a blanket, amidst the passion of rigorous training or a fight, or, what Jiraiya had preferred, voyeuristically lounging about near an outside hot-spring.

Hey, everyone had their hobbies.

Fate seemed to be against the Sannin that day, for all the T&A this pervert got to see were apes and tanukis that seemed to run rampant in this area of the woods. In fact, he was just about to call it quits when a slight splashing of water caught his attention. The mist, around the hot-spring wasn't too thick, so Jiraiya observed as figure of a towel-wrapped person entered the same spring as him.

And what a stunning vision it was! This person idly flaunted long brown hair that reached past slender and sharp shoulders. These dark strands seemed to compliment with the person's exotic and mist-coated, tanned skin (with no noticeable tan lines either, the pervert drooled at the thought). Even with the towel clutched in front of them, Jiraiya could tell that the newcomer also had such an eye-pleasing, slender and lithe looking body and moved with such graceful movements that told stories of either years of taijutsu training or dancing. If not for the dark line that spread across this person's face, Jiraiya could swear that he was in the presence of a Bodhisattva. It was such perfection!

Now... if only he could tell if this person was male or female, then his day would be complete...

Midway entering the spring, the other seemed to notice they weren't alone either. With a slight jerk of the head, which caused several strands of hair to fall across their face, the figure let out a soft, sharp gasp of surprise, only to ease the expression and give a heart-melting smile as a greeting.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know anyone else was here. I'll find another spring if that's alright with you."

Had it not been for the fact that he would have looked uncool to the person, not to mention probably scare them away entirely, Jiraiya would have pulled out his hair in frustration of still not being able to distinguish the gender of the person before him. Their voice was a bit deep but had a slight feminine hitch to it. In fact, the sound of the person's voice felt like smooth honey melting within a cup of fresh warm tea. It was enough to bring a slight smirk to the older man's face. Of course he had to break away from his blissful thoughts when the other turned to leave.

"No no no! That's quite alright! If you don't mind, I could use the company! Perhaps we could share a drink?" At this Jiraiya pulled out his ultimate weapon for wooing even the most stubborn of women: A jug of the finest and smoothest sake from the Lightning country. Unlike all other forms of Sake, that from the Lightning country was famous because it seemed to represent its element. Easing down like a smooth river of light it was strong enough to leave a sharp kick to the senses, and afterwards the person was left awed and dazed in its splendor.

Jiraiya mentally jotted that down to sell as an advertisement.

With a coy smile and a light blush, the newcomer nodded to the request and resumed to submerge themself back into the spring. Seating an arm-length's away from the Sannin, and allowing the water to cover up to the shoulders, the brown-haired unknown leaned back against the spring-heated rocks and let out a blissful sigh of contentment as the warm water eased the body into relaxation.

Jiraiya wasn't sure he could take much torture.

Soon the two were conversing quite amicably, and all it took was a single cup for the newcomer to open up and explain a bit about who that person was. The person had introduced themself as simply "Iruka". Iruka was a teacher and had started teaching for the first time this year. Since then, visits to the onsen had been much more appreciated after a hard day's work. It was at Iruka's second cup did Jiraiya learn that Iruka wasn't any ordinary teacher, but rather a ninja and had taught at the ninja academy. When asked for what village, Iruka politely laughed off the question and told anecdotes of misadventures of students and their training, as if the question was never posed. Not even with his third or fourth cup did Iruka let up anything of the village of origin.

At this point, Jiraiya was quite sure Iruka was a spy, and a pretty damn good one! Even after finishing five cups of his strongest sake, Iruka had not let up anything about the village of origin, nor gave off any clues on a sexual category. Jiraiya had been hopeful that after talking for a while, Iruka would say a word with a dialect or slang that could help identify him or herself. Hopefully with the use of a "boku" or an "atashi" or anything! Still, despite everything, Iruka spoke, although with a bit of a drunken slur, in genderless and standardized Japanese with a common dialect. What did change, however, was the decrease of politeness in the terms.

It was time to take drastic measures.

Taking note of the relaxed and slightly glazed expression in Iruka's eye, Jiraiya used all his skill as a Sannin to quietly make his way towards Iruka. He reminded himself that he was not out to "cop a feel" but rather to "identify a potential threat to the village." Nodding in satisfaction to that feeble reasoning, Jiraiya reached out his hands...

...And gripped a sharp, jagged and moss-slimed rocky surface.

Peering down, Jiraiya realized that the reason for such an odd texture was indeed because he was gripping at the sharp, jagged and moss-slimed rocky surface of the area surrounding the spring. Iruka, on the other hand, had leaned away from those grabbing hands, with eyes widened with surprise and slight irritation.

"Excuse me, what are you doing?"

Realizing that he had lost the element of surprise, Jiraiya decided a more direct approach was necessary. Wriggling his fingers in anticipation, the Sannin couldn't help but give a perverted gleam in his determined eyes.

"Forgive me Iruka-san, but I must do this for the safety of the village!"

"WHAT?!"

Almost as if not wanting to wait for an explanation, Iruka leapt away from the older man, leaving the towel behind in haste. Iruka had one foot outside the spring when, in a sudden determined leap of perversion, Jiraiya wrapped one arm around Iruka's chest, and the other cupped between the legs.

Time froze for the two people.

After retrieving the information from the findings of both hands, Jiraiya's thoughts went into a simplified mathematical mode and came to the logical conclusion based on the following formula:

Subtraction (top) Addition (bottom) Iruka male.

Realizing this, the repulsed Sannin was about to hastily pull his hands away when a large volcanic rock was slammed callously atop the white-haired man's head, rendering said pervert unconscious and float face-down on the water.

"I'm sorry, but I'm not THAT drunk!" With cheeks burning in extreme humiliation, Iruka exited away from the spring and with furious, storming strides, he made his way back to nearby inn to dress.

--

Naruto couldn't breathe since he was laughing too hard, much to Iruka's chagrin. Not that Iruka could blame the boy. On the outside perspective, he too would have been laughing in good-natured humor... alas perspective had a shitty way of distorting things.

Jiraiya, currently looking away from the scene after having recounted the story to his student, had a slight blush gracing his rugged features. It was only after the incident (to which he awoke after nearly drowning in the spring and with headache reminiscing one of Tsunade's right-hooks) did he soon take the opportunity to learn that Iruka was a ninja of Konoha, and not a threat to the village at all. The reason why he had been in the area was to deliver some scrolls on behalf of his late sensei, Sarutobi, and, in fact, had been well trusted by the Sandaime.

When confronting his former instructor about Iruka, Sarutobi-sensei wouldn't say much to enlighten Jiraiya's curiosity. Not even when he had recounted his encounter of the newly graduated Chuunin to the elder. Of course, this was because the leader of Konoha was, at that time, slouched over the desk with his shoulders shaking in unsuppressed laughter.

"Hmm... You know, that does sound a bit familiar."

Breaking away from their thoughts, the three looked towards the new voice that hovered over them.

"Ah! Kakashi-sensei!" Naruto greeted loudly.

Indeed, the owner of the voice was the silver-haired jounin, (and number two pervert in Naruto's book). Kakashi was at the moment crouched atop a low hanging branch, overlooking the trio. Naruto couldn't help but blink in slight confusion upon registering his second sensei's words. Turning about Naruto observed that Jiraiya seemed to grow more uncomfortable, and Iruka-sensei was now glaring questionably at the copy-eyed ninja.

"Familiar? How so?"

If Kakashi could grin, he would have given one to rival the Cheshire cat's from Alice in Wonderland. However, due to his mask, he could only curve his eye good-naturedly at the chuunin below and idly tossed a worn and withered book at the brown-haired man.

"Volume two, chapter 7, 'Beauty of the Mist', isn't that right Jiraiya-sensei?"

Flipping towards and skimming over the mentioned chapter, Iruka could only gape soundlessly and blush deeply as the story told of a "brown-haired stranger the hero had encountered in a forbidden spring. In fact, much of the events that had happened between Jiraiya and himself were poetically documented within the book... up until the point when the "mysterious bijin" had been grabbed from behind. From then on the story diverged completely and differently from the real events. The hero had "discovered" that the beauty he had been conversing with (which was female, by the way) was in fact a blessed spirit of the springs and had wanted to reward the hero for his good deeds in many pleasing ways. If Iruka could blush any more, steam would be coming from his ears!

Slamming the book shut, Iruka began to glow from a fiery and vexing aura. The air around him began to intensify so much that slowly it began to burn the corners of the book from the heat being put out; much to Kakashi's ignored protests.

Jiriaya was not a Sannin for nothing. Mustering up all knowledge and skill that he possessed, he quickly bid the group a farewell before disappearing with a slight puff of smoke, eliminating any trace of his presence for miles.

Heaving out a huge sigh, Iruka displaced his aura until he was no longer burning anything within a 5 foot radius. Sometimes it just didn't pay to wake up in the mornings. Turning towards the other two ninjas nearby, Iruka couldn't help but inwardly smirk at the feared and awed expression on Naruto's face. Iruka supposed he probably overdid it on the chakra, but that didn't matter now. And, although he wanted nothing more but to tear the book to shreds and use it for kindling, Iruka grudgingly returned Kakashi's book back to its rightful owner. With a light tap to the shoulder, Iruka snapped Naruto away from his daze and smiled good-naturedly at the blond-haired boy.

"How does a bowl of ramen sound to you right now?"

"HELL YEAH!!" Jumping up for joy, Naruto quickly disregarded the previous events and with renewed vigor, he started skipping towards town, and more directly towards the Ichiraku. Iruka, on the other hand, had paused briefly to look back at Kakashi, a friendly and disarming smile upon the chuunin's face.

"Kakashi-sensei? You're free to join us if you would like."

Without waiting for a response, Iruka began to descend his way towards the village as well, hoping to make it in time before Naruto ordered his fifth bowl. There was a limit to his budget after all.

"Iruka-sensei?"

Not pausing in his stride, Iruka looked back towards the following jounin and tilted his head in a questioning manner.

"Yes, Kakashi-sensei?"

Kakashi, in turn curved his eye in a playful manner and even mimicked the chuunin by tilting his own head as well.

"If the story is in indeed true, do you really have a tattoo down there?"

Suddenly Kakashi froze, literally and figuratively... heck he could feel a bit of frost hardening the material of his mask. Opening his eye to inquire about the sudden phenomenon, he saw Iruka-sensei facing him quietly. While the chuunin had his usual smile about him, something about the man's aura just seemed to chill him down to the bone. It was quite intimidating (and quite awe-inspiring) especially from someone of such a lower rank than he. The chill worsened when Iruka began to speak to the white-haired man.

"Kakashi-sensei, no more questions, okay?"

"H-hai.."

With that eerie smile still on his face, Iruka nodded to the jounin and resumed his way back to village. Kakashi just stood there for a brief moment before giving a slight shudder to shake the effect off of him then resumed following the "mild-mannered" chuunin.

Indeed, for the sake of his well-being... sometimes...it was just best not to ask.