Title: The Hardest Thing

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter in any way or form, even if my mind wishes to think so. Not mine, leave me alone.

Dedications: Ja-leandra-la-lok, who loves this pairing. Reaka for being my stalker. Chrissy for being my "bitch". Lauren (Nicholas will be forever prettier! Do you still have those cups? Just curious.) And all my friends on Willow's fics forum! (Mac, Kitty, Willow, Jens!)

Warnings: R. Rated for mentions of abuse, use of vulgar terms, and swearing. M-Preg. Somehow in my twisted imagination, boys can get pregnant. It's just something that can happen in my version of their world. Slash. If you didn't leave after finding out a guy can get pregnant, it shouldn't shock you that the main character is gay and has a romantic relationship with a man. If you don't like any of that, don't read it. I'm not by any means forcing you to endure my writing.

Pairings: Harry Potter/ Severus Snape, Sirius/Remus (eventually a back ground couple...I think)

Category: Romance/ Angst

Summary: 16 year old Harry Potter is sent home to live with the Dursleys' again for the summer. Harry is put back into the unbearably small cupboard to use as a bedroom and forced to write letters to the order every three days telling them that everything is alright. But it's not. Harry is harboring a huge secret. What will happen when its time to reveal this secret to the order? And more importantly, what is Severus Snape going to do about it?

Authors Note: Welcome to the beginning of another story! I'm so proud! I've finally gotten something posted on this story! Okay, back to business. Keep in mind the warnings for this story. They're there for a reason. Sirius is alive! I simply don't accept what happened to him in OotP. And all I really have left to say is that this somewhat follows the path of some of those "Sev/ Harry rescue from the Dursleys'" stories. But only very loosely followed. In this particular story, there are some major differences. With that said, I want to make it clear that everything will work out in the end! That's it for me! Read and Review!

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Chapter 1- The Big Secret

"You're just a whore."

The words echoed yet again in his mind. He hated himself. How could he have fallen for it? Wasn't the trap just so obvious? Tears prickled at his eyes yet again, but this time he let them fall. The one man he thought he could count on, the one person who had ever loved him thought he was a whore.

Ever since returning to the Dursleys', their treatment of him had gotten worse. The threats issued by the Order only had him writing letters for everyday telling them that everything was okay. Even though it wasn't. Dudley got his second bedroom back while Harry was back in the cupboard. The very dark cupboard that smelled like mold and dust. On top of that they were hardly even feeding him. Apparently if they did that, it would break the illusion that he didn't exist.

As if all of that wasn't enough, he'd been feeling off for weeks. Giving birth in a cupboard could do that. So far, no one knew about the child; which was a good thing because the Dursleys' probably would've killed him by now.

Now he had a damn good reason to survive. Namely his son Andrew. Harry himself might go hungry, but not his baby. It turned out that he was capable of breast feeding.

'I learn something new everyday,' He thought idly as Andrew feasted. He knew he'd have to tell someone eventually. This was just too big of a thing to keep secret. The only things debatable was who to tell and how.

'Ron wouldn't suspect anything if I sent him an encrypted message. He's not the type to read between the lines. For that matter neither is Sirius, but he's quick to jump to conclusions about my well-being. In this case that's exactly what I need. And Hermioneâ€she'll just know that something's wrong. I guess I'll just have to hope one of them catches on,' Harry thought pulling out the paper he was given to use when writing to the order. He stared at it for a few moments, then began writing.

Hi everyone!

I'm feeling great! As well as I felt during the Triwizard tournament during the first task! I'm having such a great summer! I'm so busy with my homework I don't think I'll have time to visit you all at Gimmald Place this year. See you September 1st!

Harry

Harry looked down at his finished letter and decided that it would do. With any luck, he'd be able to leave the Dursleys' in three days. As suspicious of him as they were, it didn't change the fact that they were just downright stupid.

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A/N: What did you think? Love it? Hate it? Unsure? Let me know! Review!