Lost in You

Chapter One

Six days went by
Trying to forget his face
It was you and I
We were to young for these games

-This whole story is in Brooke's POV. The story is about how Brooke has a really big crush on Nathan and how she deals with seeing him and Haley together. The Brooke-Lucas-Peyton triangle never happened, but Peyton and Lucas are together. In this story, Nathan has his own apartment and his parents are in the process of getting a divorce.

I walked out of my house with my leather coat wrapped tightly around me. My parents were fighting again, and I honestly didn't want to hear their shit. I got into my car and turned the radio up loud and drove to my favorite bar.

The bouncer knew me by my name, and I always could get me in without a problem. Granted, I had slept with the creep, but that was my reputation and I wasn't going to change it for anyone.

The first thing I did was walk up to the bar and ordered a drink. It was my routine, get a drink, get drunk, find a hot guy, sleep with him, go home, and repeat. People told me it was wrong, but they didn't know the pain I felt. They had parents who were around and told them how much they loved him. The only time I was told that I was loved was by some guy when I went on vacation to Hawaii, but he was drunk and 18 and I was only 15. The next morning I woke up and he was gone, yup ladies and gentleman that's love.

I sipped my drink and sent playful looks out to all the hot guys. I got some smirks back, and some glares back from their bimbo flat-chested girlfriends. But I was Brooke Davis, so I just went on my way and found more hot guys. I walked over to a dirty blonde guy and touched his arm lightly.

"How 'bout you buy me a drink?" I asked him as I ran my hand through my hair and flashed my pearly whites.

The boy smiled at me; "Sure," he said and then led me over to the bar where he ordered me a martini.

I fed him the olive and I could see his eyes light up, "Come on," I whispered in his ear as I pulled him towards the exit. We got into his car and things got heated. He whispered sweet nothings in my ear, but I never paid attention to things like that. Besides, it was just sex to me.

When it ended I got out of the car and fixed my top, "You should call me sometime," he said as he handed me a paper with his phone number on it.

"Right," I said sarcastically as I tore up the piece of paper right in front of him and watched his eyes follow the torn pieces of paper to the pavement, "You weren't that good honey," I grumbled and then walked to my car. I was telling the truth, he wasn't that good, but I needed a piece and for tonight he was the first guy I picked.

I got in my car and looked over to him and laughed. He looked down at the ground and was talking to himself. He was probably thinking what he had done wrong to not make me want to go out on another date. This kid obviously did not know me; I didn't do the whole dating thing.

I pulled out of the parking lot and drove home. I got out of my car and saw that my parents were gone. I sang a little bit as I skipped into my house and up the stairs to my pink bedroom. I got a shower and when I came out got my PJ's on and got on the computer for a little while. Nobody was on except for Nathan, but I never had the nerve to talk to him.

Nobody knew it, but I had a major crush on Nathan Scott ever since the day in 7th grade when he asked me if I would be his best friend. We were best friends for a while, until 9th grade when we both had our own little title. I was the hot, slutty freshman, and he was the hot, player freshman. We were in the same clique, but we never dated and then he started dating my best friend Peyton. That ended and I thought I had finally had my chance to be with him, but then Haley James came along and stole his heart. I tried to ruin them, but whatever I did didn't work.

I logged off my AOL and got into my bed and held onto my pillows. It was sad coming back from my night of sexual escapades, because when I come home I feel so lonely. Lonely should be my middle name. Bitch should be my first and Slut should be my last name. Lonely Bitch Slut, has a nice ring to it I think. I laughed as I thought about the name, it was pathetic that I broke myself down like this, but when you're lonely and you're reputation is only about sleeping with guys it's kind of hard to not go to bed without verbally abusing yourself.

My annoying alarm clock woke me up and I turned over and told the inanimate object to shut the hell up. I rolled out of my bed and got a shower, and when I got out put on a hot outfit and did my make up. Doing my make up was my favorite thing to do; it was like a mask you could put on when you were sad or mad. So I put on my mask and headed out the door with a smile on my face.

I pulled into my usual parking spot at the school and walked towards the place I called hell. I walked through the double doors and immediately saw Peyton and Lucas making out near here locker. I thought it was cute that the two were together, but I was definitely jealous that Peyton had a hot boyfriend and I had no one. I passed them and gave them a little wave and then went to my locker. Seconds later I was tapped on the shoulder and turned to see the blonde PDA queen herself standing beside with a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Are you having a good morning?" I teased as I got my books and started walking to class.

Peyton smiled, "Definitely," she said, "Are you?"

"I had a good night," I said and gave her my signature wink.

"Slut," Peyton said, but was definitely kidding. Peyton hated when I went out to random places and met up with random guys and slept with them. She thought it was dangerous and that it would ruin my reputation. My reputation was already ruined so I honestly didn't give a damn.

Classes went by fast and teachers' lectures got more boring and more boring as the day went on. The 8th period bell finally rang and I was free from all the talks about science and about math. I walked to my locker to get my cheerleading stuff and low and behold I saw Haley James and Nathan Scott walking down the hall hand in hand. I rolled my eyes at how pathetic they were. I was jealous and I was so used to getting everything that I wanted.

I got my stuff and headed to the gym. Tim was there waiting for me as usual and whistling at me, and saying perverted things to me until Coach Whitey called him over for sprints. I walked over to Peyton with my pom-poms in hand.

"You going to the party tonight?" Peyton asked me as soon as soon as I was in ear shot.

I laughed, "Would I ever miss a party?"

Peyton nodded, "Of course not."

I stretched my quads and looked around the gym floor, "Whose party is it?"

"Haley and Nathan's," Peyton answered as she helped me stretch my arms.

I rolled my eyes, "They're having parties together now?" I asked, "How pathetic."

Peyton didn't notice my jealousy, and I was glad. Nobody knew how much I really liked Nathan, except for Jake. I was close with Jake, and people always thought we were dating or that we were sleeping together, but we weren't. Jake held me as I told him about all the feelings that I have for Nathan. He kissed the top of my head and told me that one day Nathan would see what a great girl I was. That one day never came, and I waited and waited for years. I don't know why I wait for him, but he's the kind of guy I would wait for forever.

Both practices ended and I ran up and jumped on Jake's back, "Hey you," I greeted as he held me tightly so that I wouldn't fall.

"This is a friendly greeting," Jake said as he twirled me around until I screamed for him to stop. He set me down and ruffled up my hair, "Are you going to the party tonight?"

I nodded, "Yup, are you?"

He shrugged, "I don't know," he said, "I can't really leave Jenny home alone," he whispered.

I lowered my voice so that nobody could hear us, "Find a babysitter." I was the only one who knew about Jenny. She was Jake's daughter and he took care of her because her mom had run off as soon as Jenny was born. When I looked at Jenny I can't see how any one could leave the little cutie. Jake took my advice and got on his cell phone to call his parents and get them to baby sit Jenny.

Nathan walked up to the both of us, and I swore that my heart had stopped for just a second, "Are you two coming to mine and Haley's party tonight?" He asked as he rubbed the back of his head.

I nodded. I hated when he said the name Haley. It made me so angry and mad and I just wanted to scream at the top of my lungs. I was jealous of the poor virgin; I could only see one thing that Nathan could possibly see in her: Innocence.

"Hey Brooke," Nathan said, "Don't get drunk tonight and go home with some random guy that Tim brings," he said to me with cockiness on the tip of his tongue.

I laughed sarcastically, "I won't," I said. He had no idea how I felt about him, or else I don't think he would have said the things he said to me. Nathan had the right to be mad at me, especially since that night when I tried to ruin things with him and Haley, "Sorry Nathan," was all I had to say and then I walked away; embarrassed and ashamed.

Nathan looked at Jake in confusion, "What's she sorry for?" He asked Jake.

Jake watched as Brooke left, "I don't know," he lied, "Maybe you just have to be nicer to her." He then walked away and followed Brooke.

"Brooke," I heard Jake say my name, but I kept walking, "Brooke," he repeated, this time I little louder.

I turned around with tears and my eyes, "What?" I yelled.

He pulled me close to him and rocked me side to side, "You know he doesn't mean the things he says Brooke," he assured me.

"Why do I keep doing this to myself," I asked, even though I knew Jake couldn't answer the question for me, I had to answer it for myself.

Jake rubbed my back with one hand, "We'll go to that party together," he said as he took my hand and we walked towards our cars.

I knocked on Jake's door twice and he answered the door looking very cute, "Looking good Jakey," I said as I checked out his butt playfully.

Jake laughed, "Thanks," he said as he put his arm around, "You're not looking too bad yourself little lady," he opened the car door for me and then got in his own side.

We rocked out to the music and when we got close to the apartment we turned it down and tried to act calm and collected, "This will be fun," I assured myself.

Jake laughed, "Insane people talk to themselves."

"I'm sane," I said and then stuck my tongue out at him.

"Right," Jake said and then got out of the car. I got out of my own side and could hear the music blasting; the only thing I was hoping was that the cops didn't come and that I didn't see Haley or Nathan.

We walked into the apartment and saw that it was pretty crowded. I held onto Jake's hand and we walked towards Peyton and Lucas who were sitting at the kitchen counter, "Hey," I said over the music.

Peyton stood up and gave me a big hug, "Brooke!" She squealed, "You came."

"Of course I came," I said slowly so that she could understand me. I knew that Peyton was drunk; she was the weirdest partier I knew. She got drunk in the beginning of a party and by the end she was sober.

I grabbed a drink off the counter and sat down on the couch next to Jake, "This is fun," Jake said sarcastically. I laughed and nodded my head.

"Believe me it gets better," I assured him. I heard someone yell "Truth or Dare" and smiled at Jake, "Told you so."

I grabbed Jake's hand and walked over to the crowd of people that wanted to play. Jake and I sat beside each other and watched as Theresa and Bevin kissed each other causing all the "little boys" to howl. Jake laughed and looked down at the ground; I thought it was cute how he was such a gentleman. I patted him on the shoulder, "If you make me kiss another girl I'll kill you," I playfully whispered in his ear.

He laughed, "I know that's a promise."

"Okay," I heard Nathan bellow, "Jake and Brooke. You two are always together, tell us Jake have you ever slept with Brooke because most of the guys in this room have," Nathan said with his arm tightly around Haley.

My eyes burned and my fists were clenched tightly. I looked around the staring eyes and looked at Haley who was laughing along with Nathan like an idiot. I stormed out of the apartment and ran to Jake's car and leaned against it and cried. A few seconds later I saw Jake come towards me with an apologetic look on his face.

He came towards me and wrapped his arms around and let me cry on his shoulder. "I'm sorry Jake," I said with a muffled sniff.

"What are you sorry for?" Jake asked as he looked down at me, "Brooke, you didn't do anything."

I sobbed quietly, "I'm sorry about Nathan saying those things."

Jake kissed my tear stained cheek, "I told that bastard to go to hell, and that you and I were just friends. Then I came out to see if you were okay."

"Can you take me home?" I asked as I walked towards the passenger's side of the car. I got in and looked out the window. Jake looked at me and rubbed my shoulder lightly.

"Don't let him get to you," was the last thing I heard from Jake before I drifted off to sleep.

Nathan looked down at the car as it pulled away. He had watched Jake comfort Brooke and just be her friend. Nathan didn't know why he was so mean to Brooke all the time, but he seemed to always lash out at her and always seemed to hurt her in the process. Nathan felt a light touch on his arm and turned to see Haley beside him.

"Just remember how much she tried to hurt us," Haley reminded him.

Nathan nodded and put his arm around Haley, "Yeah I know," he said softly. He smiled at his girlfriend, but on the inside he kept thinking about how much he had really hurt Brooke.

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