A/N's: Awww... the absolute final chapter! I'm really sad in one way, but happy too, does that make sense? I want to thank you all for reading, hope you enjoyed the ride as much as I did. One last time I'd like to thank Pheral, you made this story better. And hopefully I'll come up with another story idea any time soon, grin. - Corine (aka CD57).

22. Peace of Mind.

It was nearly two o'clock in the middle of the night. Calleigh wasn't sure what had woken her up. Silently she lay there, listening, but nothing except the rustling of the wind blowing through the trees next to her house disturbed the quiet night.

Slowly pushing the blankets aside Calleigh sat up, shifted her legs over the edge of the bed and slid her feet into her slippers. Quietly she stood, all her attention directed at listening for anything unusual.

She left the guestroom then crossed the hallway, her feet making no noise on the soft carpet. The door to the master bedroom was open and she peered inside. A single beam of light from the moon outside entered the bedroom through the nearly closed curtains, showing her the empty spot on the bed.

It didn't surprise her. The last week she'd developed a sixth sense regarding Horatio's well-being. The slightest disturbance was enough for her to raise from her slumber, shaking her awake instantly, alert and ready to respond to any discomfort he was experiencing.

Her subconscious must have warned her this time as well, urging her to go and search for one missing Lieutenant.

Calleigh found him standing in the living room, in front of the window. His back was directed to her and leaning on his crutches he stood there, simply staring into the dark, silent night. The dim moonlight entering the living room colored his hair a shiny shade of gold.

Crossing her arms Calleigh leaned against the door frame and remained quiet; merely just watching him, wondering what it was that troubled him this time.

Silently he stood there, undisturbed and unmoving, leaving Calleigh to guess whether he'd heard her approach or not. Normally she wouldn't be questioning that, she knew very little got by his sharp mind, but he wasn't exactly back to himself yet.

She waited patiently, deliberately giving him the time and space he obviously needed.

Finally after a long time he spoke up, his voice soft and barely audible. "I..." he paused again, didn't look up or around, then continued. "I didn't have another nightmare this time, Calleigh."

She let out a sigh in relief. She'd been worried, standing there waiting had not only left her shivering from the cold but had also left her wondering whether she'd slept through another of his nightmares.

"I'm just thinking about the nightmares. About how real they are. I dream about hanging there. They... they are standing in front of me, covered in their black robes, their eyes glowing in the dark. It... It's all so real. I hear the wheezing sound of the leather whip slicing through the air before it lands on my back..." a shiver ran over Horatio's spine, but other than that he didn't move. "I feel the pain as it tears my skin and I feel the blood oozing down my back."

Calleigh blinked, her eyes slowly wetting and a single tear rolled down her left cheek.

"I have no control over the situation... I try, I try so hard to make them understand but I can't get through to them. The whip comes down again and again. They don't listen. I fail, I can't help them, Calleigh..."

She wanted to scream at him, that it hadn't been his fault, she wanted to rush forward and shake some sense in him, but she knew she couldn't do that. Not now, not at the first moment that he'd finally found the courage to open up. She forced herself to remain where she was and listen to what he had to tell.

"I feel every lash, every blow, the chain wrapping around my legs... my shins are swelling up from the force of the blows." He tilted his head and looked up, his gaze directed at the moon. "Then the chain comes down again, on my foot. I feel my toes snap and it hurts so bad that it makes me sick to the stomach and then I wake up gasping for air..."

Calleigh closed her eyes in despair and silently lifted a hand, her thumb brushing away another tear rolling down her face. When she opened her eyes again she saw he'd dropped his head, chin to the chest and she wondered what to do.

He took the decision from her as he spoke up again. "There's also another nightmare. In this dream I'm running through the fields, through the woods, chased after by a group of Clan-dressed figures. My heart is pounding in my throat and I panic. They are closing in and suddenly I trip over something, I try to break my fall with my hands... I try to get away, but fail."

Horatio slowly turned around, the moon illuminating his face, showing a sad smile. "The end is always the same. I know I have to get away, that something bad is going to happen if I let them catch me, but I fail each time. That's when I wake up, shaking and drenched in sweat."

Calleigh stared at him, studying him closely. Each word had added to her vivid picture of the torture he'd been subjected to, building on what the case evidence had shown her and the story told by the scars and marks all over his body. It sent shivers down her spine, yet she was grateful that he trusted her enough to finally share these terrible events.

His gaze dropped to the floor. "Then there's also the one in which I'm dying. I know I am, as I struggle to draw in a breath. My chest is heaving, my lungs are filled with fluid and I can hear the rattling, gargling sound of my own breathing. My ears are ringing and I can vaguely hear voices... Voices telling me to relax, to keep on breathing. I try... I try so hard. The voices are urging me to hang on but I'm fading. I can't breath, I gasp and choke and then my world slowly turns black. I'm slipping away and can't stop it. Failing again."

Calleigh looked at him, biting on her lip. She didn't want to sob, didn't want to sniff. She needed to hear him out, needed to grant him this chance without disturbance. She wanted to be strong for him but was unable to stop the tears slowly rolling down her cheeks.

He stood there, awkwardly leaning on his crutches, a shiver shaking his tall frame. He remained silent for a long time, and used this to regain his composure before he felt secure enough to tilt his head and face her. "You're crying."

Calleigh lifted a hand to wipe the moisture from her face. "No," she started, then quickly corrected herself, knowing he didn't deserve to be lied at. "Only a little."

"I'm sorry," he stated with a soft, sad voice.

"Don't," she pleaded. "Don't be sorry, Horatio. Please, don't."

Horatio glanced at her, then gave a slight nod.

She moved forward now, until she was close to him and gently took him by the arm. "Come on, you've been standing on that leg for a long time now. Let's sit down."

Carefully she guided him to the couch and helped him down. She drew a small coffee table closer so he could put his leg up before she sat down next to him. "What woke you up tonight?" she asked.

"Tonight, I had a different dream," he slowly started. Lifting his arm Horatio brought his hand to her face and gently wiped the tears away. "Tonight, the dream concentrated on catching the students. On the gathered evidence, it all being enough to put them through trial and send them to jail for a long time. Then, last but not least, I dreamed about Barbosa in custody. And woke up knowing it was all over." He lifted his head and glanced sideways, a frown etched on his face. "So where does that leave me, Calleigh?"

She quickly ran a hand over her face again, then brought her hand to his lap, grabbing his hand to give it a gentle squeeze. "That leaves you on the road to recovery, Horatio," she responded, as she smiled at him. "I wish I could ensure you it was all over now, that the nightmares aren't coming back, but honestly, I can't. I have no idea, but I suggest we're just going to have to take slow steps. You're a fighter, Horatio. You're going to be okay, of that I'm absolutely sure."

"Thank you for your support," Horatio said softly.

"You're welcome, handsome. And thank you, too," Calleigh responded, then placed her arm around him, encouraging him to lean against her and lay his head on her shoulder. "You let me in, and I know how difficult that is for you. It means a lot to me."

She moved her hand until it was touching his head and started drawing circles in his hair. "Tired?" she asked.

"Hmmm, no," he said sleepily.

Calleigh chuckled. Her fingers never stopped moving as her mind traveled back to that horrible day, where they'd come really close to losing him. That thought haunted her in her own dreams, although she didn't want to tell him that yet. He had enough on his mind already so she had to battle her own demons. It helped, to sit here on the couch with him safely in her arms. It helped her focus on the here and now.

Calleigh listened to his slow, even breathing. He said he wasn't tired yet he'd fallen asleep again. Calleigh smiled. She shifted a little until she was more comfortable then closed her eyes. He wasn't dead, she hadn't lost him. This was real. He was in her arms, keeping her warm. That was all that mattered.

THE END - FINITO - ENDE