Title: Day in the Life- Sanji
Author: Celeste
Fandom: One Piece
Word Count: 845
Summary: Sanji's every day schedule.
Rating: PG-13 (no yaoi though, goddamit)
Time: 27 mins
Dedication: Ivan's request. This was surprisingly hard.
Disclaimer: So not mine. Dammit!

The day began like any other, Sanji being groused awake by the noise a certain idiotic swordsman made as he got up and prepared for his morning training. On those familiar sounds, the chef rose as well, popped in his customary "Good-fucking-too-early-in-the-morning" cigarette and dressed before heading to the galley.

The sun peaked over the horizon and mocked the fact that he was up before it. Time? Approximately 5:45am.

He cheered up once he reached his kitchen, donning apron and dousing cigarette. His hands were washed and then he was away, peeling, chopping, slicing, steaming, frying.

7:00 and that idiot green-hair stumbled in, sweaty and nasty but with a self-satisfied smirk that Sanji was tempted to boot off his face (because they all knew he could). But instead, he gave the dumbass a cookie and chased him out of the galley before he contaminated the entire place.

Around 7:13 the smells of breakfast began to consume the ship and he heard the telltale rumblings of his drooling captain. Arms laden with dishes as he set the table, he positioned himself by the doors, and as the thunder grew dangerously loud, he lashed out with his right foot, catching Luffy as he launched himself through the doors, intent on diving onto the table but instead finding himself wrapping elastically around Sanji's leg.

The chef pushed back with said leg and used Luffy's rebounding force to knock him back out the door towards the deck. "Ten minutes, you idiot. Gimme ten minutes."

Five minutes later, he placed flowers in the vase on the table beside the two most comfortable seats and called Nami and Vivi in for their meal.

Three seconds later he kicked Luffy out of the galley again.

The girls seated, he preened for them in the hopes of getting some love. They thanked him. He swooned. No action though.

Damn.

Somehow, he still remembered to ring the bell for everyone else.

This time he grabbed Luffy by the collar as he shot through the door and held him until his elasticity values returned to normal setting.

Eating commenced.

10:30 saw him washing dishes. Luffy whined about being hungry.

He gave the idiot a handful of cookies and chased him out before the captain started licking the pots and pans.

11:10 he began mixing ingredients for lunch.

11:22, and Usopp screamed.

Sanji grumbled, removed his apron, and headed to deck.

He got 26 of the attacking pirates.

Zoro got 27.

Bastard.

11:31 saw the continuation of lunch preparations.

1:20 meant a late lunch. Luffy was famished. Chewed on Usopp's arm for a while. Sanji was too tired/amused to stop him.

Vivi noticed his fatigue, and princess that she was, told him he should take a rest because they most likely wouldn't need an afternoon snack considering that lunch was late.

One look at her sweet, concerned face and energy levels returned to 100%.

Zoro made a snide comment.

Sanji kicked him in the head.

A brawl might have commenced, but cannon fire sounded at around 2:00.

The crew headed outside.

2:03 and Sanji had managed to take out 32 marines.

Zoro got 33.

Bastard.

Zoro and Luffy collapsed on deck at 2:07 for an afternoon nap. Usopp was left grumbling to himself as he dragged bodies and dumped them overboard. Carue supervised.

3:00 rolled around and Sanji made refreshing drinks for the girls.

Still got no action though. Damn.

3:30. Zoro and Luffy were still unconscious. Sanji began preparing dinner.

4:27 Usopp and Carue finished the body dump. Sanji gave them whatever was left of the drink mix he had left that the girls' didn't finish.

5:30 and dinner was almost ready. The smells woke Luffy, who, half conscious, barreled towards the galley. Sanji caught him around his knee, sent him rebounding back to the deck.

Gave himself extra points when he kicked Luffy into still-sleeping Zoro.

Green-haired idiot's confused screams were music to the ears.

He hoped the splash meant Zoro had gone overboard and not Luffy.

6:00 Zoro was dry and the girls had their specially prepared love dinner. Sanji still hadn't gotten any action though. Damn.

6:14. Luffy ate the fish bones again. Chewed on Usopp some more and whined about being hungry. Sanji tossed him another cookie. Gave one to Zoro just to be patronizing. Heh.

7:30 and Vivi volunteered to do dishes.

Sanji volunteered Usopp in her stead.

9:00 meant Sanji's watch.

11:42 was the start of a two ship attack by no-name pirates.

11:58 was the end of the two ship attack. No one was woken up.

Sanji kicked any remaining bodies overboard.

He'd gotten 68 pirates.

Zoro hadn't gotten any.

Ha. Bastard.

12:11 meant he was 11 minutes late waking up Usopp for watch.

As he collapsed into his hammock, he told the sharpshooter to ignore the flaming wreckage of the two ships behind them.

Sleep upon him, his final thought for the day was what the breakfast menu would be tomorrow.

At 12:32, Zoro began snoring.

Sanji kicked him in the head. He kept snoring anyway.

Bastard.

END