Greetings everyone, lazEbum here and I would first off want to apologize for the long wait on the other fics. I am having some serious technical difficulties and writers block. But! Be assure I haven't given up on any and will try to continue once I get my juices flowing again ;

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or the song 'Tourniquet.' By Evanescence.

Summary: Their last mission ended up in failure and Naruto just can't take it anymore. No pairings. Rated R for cursing and attempted suicide. Slight spoilers for the current manga.

Please note: This fic was just something I made up because I was in the mood. And if you are too, it might 'touch' you. Please remember to never try this at home. if so call a hotline or something. --

'Blah, Blah' is thinking.

"Beep, Beep" Is talking

And this – Is lyrics

Enjoy

A week past before the dreadful news was announced to Konoha. The retrieval team composed of Shikamaru, Neji, Kiba, Chouji and Naruto, which was originally sent after Uchiha Sasuke, came back home, empty handed.

Naruto failed to bring back Sasuke. He failed in saving his closest friend and only worthy rival... The only person who he craved so much attention from. Even with the full help of kyuubi, Naruto still failed Sasuke was now gone from everyone's life. And it was all Naruto's fault.

Neji, Shikamaru Chouji and Kiba, they all tried there best to ease the blondes' pain. They said to him that it was not all his fault. That they were also to blame, that it was the Uchiha's foolishness that lead to his misfortune. Although the blonde had agreed with them verbally, he could never accept that mentally.

Worst of all was Sakura. She told Naruto that she forgave him. But ever since, she had yet spoken with her team mate. Kakashi on the other hand, was currently too busy being sent off to complete several missions, thus he no longer had time to train what was left of Team 7.

And so, Team 7 would never be the same.

The three Sand-Nins, Gaara, Temari and Kankuro, had decided to stay in the village until they were sure that this one was safe.

Everyone that was apart of the retrieval team that day, had volunteered to visit Naruto any and every day they could. But somehow that wasn't enough for Naruto, he was just ... too broken...

With each visit, the Leaf-Nins paid him, they noticed how Naruto's eyes no longer held the bright blue orbs of hope, instead, his eyes displayed a mixture of betrayal, pain, anger, and failure during the day, while at night, they glowed in their eerie crimson red.

He was no longer the number one loud mouth, He no longer needed attention, and He no longer felt a reason to exist.

The Uzumaki they all once knew disappeared ...

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

Shikamaru and Chouji where currently playing a game of 'Go' and surprisingly Shikamaru had lost. After realizing that fact, he slowly clasped his hands together, behind his head and laid down on his back.

Looking up at the nights sky, Shikamaru witnessed the clouds darken and begin to huddle together. He felt miserable and was now very concern for his blonde headed friend; he was after all, the one in charge of the entire operation.

He just couldn't help but feel it was more his fault than anyone else.

(Star)(Star)(Star)

Kiba had also been out of it. He and Akamaru now trained rarely and spent most of their days with Hinata, doing nothing in particular. Nothing was even said during that time. But Kiba could almost hear the cries she made within her.

'Were things ever going to change?' He questioned himself frequently.

He didn't like the fact that the two loudest ninjas were in such a state.

Although Hinata was still quite shy around her crush, she made sure to visit him as many days as she could. She even brought him ramen, since everyone knew how this was his favorite and only actually food he ate.

Despite her best efforts, Naruto simply never ate on his own anymore ...

It was just too painful.

On the same night, nature froze dead in its tracks. It rained. It rain strong and hard. 'Rain. That was how it all ended' Naruto recalled the moon could not be seen and a shadow was cast over the village.

Naruto sat on the side of his bed like always, staring at the outside. Watching as the rain hit his window with a great audacity. In the back of his mind, the Kyuubi whispered confusing ideas into his mind. At first she'd sad 'It's time to leave' then 'why are you doing this?' Over and over again thus began to vex the blonde. This had gone on for a while now, but Naruto just sat there; glancing over to his nightstand, where his kunai laid peacefully. Its then he realized, that it hadn't moved since his last mission ... The one where he failed everyone ... including himself...

Thoughts of blood filled his mind, blood and for some strange reason rain. But Naruto just shook his head disregarded. He decided to examine his favorite and only picture of team 7. He gazed hard at everyone's face as if looking for something. They all seemed happy in a way.

Looking at this picture somehow managed to ease his pain. He went off in to his own world, whenever he laid eyes on it.

I' tried to kill the pain

But once again, kyuubi fondled with his mind.

But only brought more

All of a sudden, as if being put under a spell. Naruto stood up, he slowly walked over to the nightstand, where his kunai laid and grasped it firmly within his hands. Walking back to his window, he continued to stare at the outside world. Only this time he seemed to be looking far off into the distance, searching and waiting for 'it' to arrive.

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

Neji's training was suddenly cut short, due to the hard pouring rain that appeared out of no where. He was too far away from his home to head back, so instead, he decided to take cover under the small bridge near the training grounds. Although the bridge did shelter him, if the wind were to pick up, he would definitely get a little wet.

Setting himself comfortably on the ground, careful not to get himself too wet, he now had time to think without being disturbed.

Ever since they came back to Konoha, his thoughts had been on Naruto. Back then, the young teen was full of life and hope.

Words couldn't explain how the Hyugga missed seeing the blonde annoying but cute smile, and talk of being the 6th Hokage. He was certain that Naruto could have brought Sasuke back safely, unfortunately destiny just wasn't on their side during that time.

Neji hated the Uchiha for robbing the life out of the blonde, for being so damned naïve and blind to realize how much Naruto cared for him. His thought soon brought him into his own little world.

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

Naruto discontinued his 'searching' and focused his attention on his own wrist, while in his other hand, he held the kunai in a dangerous way ... He tighten his grip on the handle and brought it only a few centimeters away from his wrist.

Naruto stopped any movement, his eyes focused on both his hands. Slowly, his nails grew longer into claws, and he knew his eyes were slowly changing into the red crimson color, just like it did every night.

Although aware of these new changes, the beating of his heart increased, but this didn't stop him from what was to come.

Naruto slowly pressed down on his soft skin. Drawing blood. His blood ...

So much more

He watched as the blood spilled over his tanned skin and then fall onto the cold wooden floor of his room. To Naruto, each drop of blood made a loud splashing sound, but he simply ignored it and stared back at his bloody wrist, immediately wincing at the sight.

Naruto raised the blade one more time, and prepared to make another cut. Drawing more blood, he watched a pool of his own blood slowly form right below his feet. He began to feel light headed and dizzy. By pure instinct, he decided to rest his body by sitting down the nearest thing and that was the floor beneath his feet.

Unfortunately, due to his dizziness, his legs could no longer support his weight. The boy slowly fell backwards, until his back and head met the hard and cold floor with a loud thud.

Naruto felt a strong pain within his stomach. He tried to turn over, but failed. He turned his gaze towards the floor. Watching the blood pour out of his wrist...

His thoughts were on the raven-haired boy. The dumb ass, Popsicle for a best friend.

'Why Sasuke?!' Naruto screamed inside. His already broken heart seemed to be counting down for a self-destruction. Naruto let out a slight chuckle.

I lay dying and I'm pouring, crimson regret and betrayal

Recalling the first time Sasuke had saved him, back in the way country to when they were in the forest of death. Naruto let out a dreadful scream. Well, it wasn't really Naruto. The Kyuubi, yelled because she was now starting to feel the pain. She yelled loud enough that it could be heard from outside of Naruto.

Naruto once again took a glance out the window.

"Dear God. I don't want to be here, there is nothing out there for me." Naruto prayed silently. The kyuubis' cries could still be heard.

I'm dying Praying Bleeding I'm screaming. Am I too lost to be saved Am I to lost?

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

Waking up from a long nap, Akamaru went out side to go to the bathroom, which unfortunately, meant he had to get himself wet from the down pouring rain. While he searched for a specific spot, the wind picked up and the dog quickly raised his head, picking up a familiar sent within the breeze.

Akamaru lost no time and ran back in to the house, to find and alert his master as soon as possible. He ran up the stairs as fast as his little legs could, and finally made his way within Kiba's room.

The dog made his way through the many piles of dirty clothes, when he finally reached the bed. Even though he was a small dog, Akamaru took a few steps back before he jumped off the ground and straight into his master's bed, and also directly on his stomach ...

Even so, the boy was always one hard to wake up, especially since they came back from their last mission, which lasted longer than usual. And so, Akamaru did the next thing that came to mind. He barked. And while he barked, he made sure to jump up and back down on his master's stomach. Surely this would wake up the boy.

In less than a minute, the boy finally woke up from his sleep, angry, to why his dog would do this to him.

After some seconds of barking and jumping up and down. Kiba finally woke up.

"What is it boy?" He asked sitting up, and rubbing his eyes. Akamaru continued to bark.

"What?!" Kiba shouted, fully understanding what his companion had said.

Placing on his gray jacket, (not the one with the fur on it) Kiba ran out side. Disregarding the heavy down pour, Kiba took a whiff of the air.

"Oh my God, Naruto, hold on!" He yelled and dashed off towards the blondes' house.

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

Neji had finally snapped out of it after a terrible thought crossed his mind. Standing up, he noted that that rain wouldn't be stopping anytime soon. 'I might as well head home.' He thought. 'At least there I'll be near warm and wont catch anything.

The Hyuga took once step forward, but something just wasn't right. With his previous thoughts always leading towards the blond, perhaps he should pay him a visit ... But something told him that perhaps he should activate his Byakugan, to make sure of course the blond was indeed present.

Once the hand seals were completed, his Byakugan activated, his eyes widened.

From a distance, he could see the same red chakra he saw during the chunnin exams. It was faint but still strong.

'Naruto?' He questioned, and decided to head that way instead.

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

Shikamaru had decided to walk Chouji since he had nothing else to do. Once Chouji made it safely home, Shikamaru started his journey back home. Despite the rain, this didn't bother him, thanks to the hooded jacket he was wearing.

He continued on his way home, when he noticed he was only a block away from Naruto's house. The boy simply looked at his blonde's friend apartment, about to continue on his way when he heard a strange sound.

Someone was defiantly in pain. But the way he heard the continuous screams, never in his life had the newly promoted Chuunin heard such a sound. It scared him a little, almost to the point that he wanted to run, but instead Shikamaru followed the sound. Also noting that he was close Naruto anyway.

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

My God my tourniquet, return to me salvation. My god my tourniquet, return to me salvation

Naruto had noticed that his wounds were slowing healing thus causing something inside of him to flinch. "You damn fox, don't you dare heal me!" Naruto cried out.

He quickly picked up his kunai and stabbed his wrist even deeper, hoping the fox would simply give up. He let out a loud and painful yell, before he fell back on the floor again.

Once more, visions of 'Him' filled his mind. It then made him think or more question himself. He wondered what the bastard doing now. Was he dead? Was he being put under some kind of unthinkable torture? Hell, Did he even go to that snake? Did he even remember us? Me?

These simple thoughts invaded his mind in a painful way. Before he even realized it, his red eyes were all watery, filled with tears that would soon shed.

'How could you betray me like this, you bastard!?' He yelled inwardly again. Naruto pleaded once more.

Do you remember me? Lost for so long. Will you be on the other side or will forget me.

I'm dying, Praying, Bleeding, I'm screaming. Am I too lost be saved? Am I to lost?

My God my tourniquet, return to me salvation. My god my tourniquet, return to me salvation

Meanwhile, Kiba and the dog had finally reached the Naruto's apartment. He stopped in his tracks when he noticed Shikmaru walking his way.

"Something's not right!" He yelled at Shikamaru. Panic written all over his face.

"I know that. Is it Naruto though?" He asked.

"Yes." Answered the third wheel. Neji jumped down from the tree. His clothes clung to his body and he seemed a little fatigued. "Naruto is in serious trouble." He answered as calmly as he could.

"Then what the fuck are we standing here for?!" Kiba yelled as he quickly ran up the stairs. Shikamaru and Neji, close behind.

-Outside-

Another mournful cry was let out and caused Kiba to stop at the door. Jingling the handle he realized that it was locked. Plan b. Kiba began banging on the door.

"Naruto! ARE YOU OK!? OPEN UP THE DOOR!" He yelled.

The scent of the boys' blood was strong but Kiba fought back his tears.

"Oh God, please be okay Naruto!!" He yelled banging on the door even harder. Neij activated his White Eye, once more, to at least check up on the boy.

"He's on the floor!" He yelled clearly seeing the boys' small frame.

"Shit! And he's bleeding!" He yelled out again. Shikamaru felt helpless and heartbroken. Out of the three of them, he was the only one who stood there doing nothing ...

Pushing Kiba to the side he too started banging on the door. "Damnitt Naruto! Open the door!!' He shouted eyes full of sorrow.

Inside the apartment, Naruto heard every word being spoken to him. He was just too weak to reply anymore. He wished that he could have told them that it was ok. That he didn't know what he was doing or why, but they shouldn't worry. But he couldn't because it would be too painful.

Hearing his companions on the other side of the door, made the unshed tears finally fall freely from his eyes. He cried, heavily but silently. He was so wasted.

This was all over a teammate, his 'stupid' teammate. The one that choose a path of power and revenge over friends or a future.

Outside of the apartment, Kiba banged on the door once again, his blood stained hands refused to give up.

"Nar-"He started only to get interrupted by a voice that still sent shivers up his spine.

"Out of the way." The voice demanded.

Turning around quickly Kiba managed to avoid behind grinded into the door, for a wave of sand crashed right through the door.

"G... Gaara?" Kiba stuttered but was pushed out of the way by the other demon boy. Neji and Shikamaru followed quickly behind this one.

Upon entering the room Gaara stopped dead in his tracks as his eyes widened in pure shock. Although he was use to a bloody battlefield, this didn't associate so well with Uzumaki Naruto, the boy that literally save him from the darkness.

The slowing dying kitsune slowly turned his head to face his intruders. A small smile spread across his lips as he let out an almost silent chuckle.

"Naruto!" Kiba yelled, rushing to the boy's side.

Kneeling down next to him Kiba had already started to cry; tears fell from his eyes and dripped down his face. Shikamaru had joined this one soon after. 'Baka' He let out. Eyes were flushed with tears as he tried to find the right words.

Having a stronger will not to cry, Neji had already started his only healing jutsu. Performing a few seals before placing both his hands on Naruto. Having watched this unexpected but strong display of emotions before him. Naruto started to think.

'They are all doing this............for me?' He asked himself. 'This wasn't suppose to happen?!'

'No!' 'It's too late.'

'I can't go back'

'I. I....' Narutos' sorrow some how turned to hate. Not for himself but for the Uchiha heir.

I WANT TO DIIIIIIIE!!!!

Using the last bit of his life energy, Naruto shouted the words;

"I want to die!" His voice was mixed with that of the Kyuubi's. His vision was no longer available and he heard the Kyuubi's cries died out.

Such an outburst would have given a person a heart attack. It was true that the boys were scared, but now was not the time to show it. They all clung to Naruto as if he would float away.

"Naruto!! Be strong! You must hang in there!" Shikamaru shouted back.

"Naruto, you don't have to do this, it's not the answer!" Neji added. He continued to transfer his chakra into the boy.

"Naruto! Please don't leave me!!" Kiba whispered, refusing to accept the fact that it was too late.

Gaara on the other hand, had not spoken a word or even moved a muscle since he arrived. He was shattered to see that the very boy that had brought him out of the darkness had fallen into it so easily.

Shukaku screamed at the sight of the blondes' blood. Tugging at his chest and pulling at his hair, Gaara felt an even greater pain than when he was young.

Slowly he slipped to the ground, landing heavily on his knees and placing both hands firmly on the ground. And for the first time since the death of his former caretaker, Yashamaru, Gaara cried, letting out a few tears fall from his eyes. He felt his heart slow down as he slipped into unconsciousness.

My God my tourniquet, return to me salvation. My god my tourniquet, return to me salvation

Naruto had finally stopped breathing. His blood felt as if it were being pulled away along with his very soul. Although he was currently in a dead state. His mind displayed a slide show.

Iruka-sensei.

Kohanamaru.

Haku.

Sakura-chan

Kakashi-sensei

Team eight, nine and ten. And finally the Fourth. As they all stood in front of him, their eyes all seemed to be telling his to live and grow strong, yet they were filled with such sorrow. Naruto hated this feeling. Lowering his head, he let a stream of tears fall from his eyes.

My wounds cry for the grave. My soul cries for deliverance.

Finally looking up, Naruto gasped. There in front of him now sat the kyuubi. Her orange glow illuminated the once dark place. Naruto realized that it was no longer imprisoned behind the giant gate. Her eyes fixed firmly on the boy.

Naruto couldn't help but gaze back. Two pairs of red glowing eyes locked together.

"You will live." She finally spoke up, in her eerie tone of voice. Naruto watched as her eyes widen and a bright light filled the scene. Naruto winced and tried to shield his eyes.

Somehow, Naruto found the strength to open his eyes. It's then that he noticed he was back in the real world, with three distinct figures that stood above his own body. All he could feel, were three sets of tears that gently fell on his soft cheeks.

Will I be denied? Christ. Tourniquet. My suicide.

(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)(Star)

R&R please

Thank you SOOOO much Ookima and Foamy, the best beta readas' out there. and I hoped you noticed my little special edition.