Rating: R. Vague references to sex and sexually transmitted diseases, underage drinking, horny things in general
Summary: Harry Potter's Live Journal for his 6th year. Harry has problems with relationships (disastrous breakups and such) and someone can help, but will he ever realize this?
Warnings: Slash (more in a tiny bit) and swearing.

Pairings: RW/HG, NL/LL, HP/GW, HP/DM
Disclaimer: Not my characters, no harm done, no money made. All characters are owned by the great JKR.

User: quidditchlovrhp

Harry's Journal


Friday, September 21

I don't know why I'm even posting anything right now. I'm so damned confused... and angry, I just don't know why I'm doing this of all things. Right now I should be punching my pillow... in place of someone's head. I feel used... I feel worn out and dirty... And then for some reason I feel slightly proud... I don't know what there is to be proud of...

Just so no one worries, yes something happened yesterday. (at night to be exact.) What happened? Well, I was betrayed. I thought I could trust someone, and then... then they just do something incredibly wrong and horrific to me.

I should leave right now. There's no point for me to keep writing...

But why would they do that? I used to think of them as some sort of friend... Can an enemy ever really be a friend? No, that's what I thought, which is why I ended our little charade.

Do you think I'm a jealous person? I don't think I am, not at all. You know what? I was accused of actually being jealous of someone yesterday, can you believe that? What would I, the Harry Potter, have to be jealous about?

Nothing, that's what... I'm going to go soon, there's just nothing much to say...

I need to sort out my feelings... No, that's not the right word, it would mean I actually had feelings for them, which I definitely did not! I merely regarded them as an adversary that I might be able to trust... But they broke that trust by... by doing something that was so stupid and...

Ugh, look at this! The git has made me all confused about... About nothing! This is wrong, this thing I thought I might of felt... I mean, who wouldn't be confused? He's a bloody poof... Yeah, that's why I'm confused... That git, he probably knew this would happen...

I'm never talking to him again... I mean, sure I'll see him in class but... But I know what he did it for and I don't appreciate it...

Wait. No.

Was he getting back at me for some of the things I did to him? I think that's why he did what he did... But he must of magicked himself or something, I mean, there's no reason for me to feel what I was under the impression that I felt because I most certainly DO NOT like him that way at all, the bloody git, and I will...

And I will stop writing run-on sentences.

Ok, right now I need to take a deep breath, forget this all happened (however hard that might be) and go see Professor Snape.

Ah, I didn't mention that did I? During breakfast I got a note from him requesting (aka demanding) I visit him later tonight. What it's about, don't ask, as he didn't tell me. I guess the git likes his surprises...

But before I do that I... I don't know why, but Hedwig is still missing... I'm losing hope...

Well, time to face hell.

-Harry

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comments

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from: prettyinred
Harry, why were you out on the quidditch pitch last night?
(reply to this)(thread)

Who told you that? Did anyone... um, did anyone think they might of seen something?

from: prettyinred
My friend told me you went out there... I only saw you walk in.
(reply to this)(thread)

Well you can tell your friend to mind her business.

from: prettyinred
Gosh, sorry, didn't know you were being a royal prat today... She just thought it was odd you were out there with Malfoy... I don't blame her, anyone would think it odd.
(reply to this)(thread)

Was the whole fucking school out there? Seriously, I do NOT want to talk about this, especially to you.

from: redhairdwonder
Don't talk to my sister like that!
(reply to this)(thread)

from: prettyinred
Leave it alone Ronald, I can deal with this myself.
(reply to this)(thread)

Get the fuck off my journal.

from: redhairedwonder
Hey! Did you not understand me? Stop being a cunt, Harry.
(reply to this)(thread)

It's not my fault the bitch sticks her nose in places where it does not belong.

from: redhairedwonder
Get off the computer, I'm coming to talk with you right now.
(reply to this)(thread)

Too late, I have a date with Snape.

from: prettyinred
Ronald, just leave him alone will you? I'm sure it's not Harry's fault he likes to snog his enemies.
(reply to this)(thread)

That's it, both of you fucking idiots are getting blocked. Bye.

from: redhairedwonder
Who'd he snog?
(reply to this)(thread)

Like I said, bye. Maybe you two should just have a little get together to discuss everyone's fucking private business.

from: fluffysmarts:
What happened last night? Malfoy refuses to tell me anything.
(reply to this)(thread)

Ha, what's Malfoy got to do with this? I didn't even know you talked to that prick.

from: fluffysmarts
Harry I... I'm worried about you. I don't like seeing you like this... Can we talk?
(reply to this)(thread)

Gee thanks, now leave me alone.

from: silverevil
I guess you've finally cracked... Potter, just hear me out: I did not mean for it to be like this. I did not betry you in any way at all... I think you knew it was coming.
(reply to this)(thread)

How do you even have the balls to show up in my personal journal after what you did? Fuck you, fuck all of you. I trusteed you and... Ugh, whatever, I'm blocking you. You mean nothing to me.


Readers, all I ask is that you please don't kill me for this post and the next few chapters after this.

All in all, I hope you liked this chapter... um, despite the fact Harry is being a prick... Well, just review, cause I plan on posting a lot more often. I just want this story to finally be finished :)

Oh, and you may have noticed I took off the whole beginning part I usually have on. I was getting tired of it, and after I revise the other chapters when this fic is done, they won't have it either.

-Jackie