Disclaimer: No own

There's a Llama…In My Bedroom.

((A/N: Annoying author's notes))

'Thoughts.'

" Stressed or emphasized words."

August 13th

" Hey, Potter!"

A pause, then…

" Fuck off Piers."

" Ooo, Potter's got spunk. Hang on, I want to ask you something."

Harry whipped his body around exasperatedly, and shook a few raven locks out of his eyes as he stood in front of Piers.

" Well, spit it out." He snapped impatiently. He did NOT feel like dealing with Dudley's stupid-ass friends right now.

Piers grinned sadistically, and inched closer to Harry. The latter's inky black eyebrows rose and he backed away slightly as Piers came a little bit too close for comfort.

" Your relatives home?"

Harry almost blanched at the husky and suggestive tone behind the query. He opened and closed his mouth for a moment as his cheeks turned red in anger, before whirling away from a seductively grinning Piers, and stalking down the dusty sidewalk towards Number 4, Privet Drive.

" Ah c'mon Potter, don't be so bloody frigid, you know you want me."

Harry just ignored him and turned up the driveway, noticing that there was no vehicle in the driveway. Damn.

He wasn't sure what Piers would do, and he looked back towards the sidewalk slowly. Harry breathed a sigh of relief when he saw nobody, and turned back to the rather plain door.

He was getting sick and tired of people hitting on him. The cashier at their local grocery store was always staring at Harry and licking his lips, people he didn't even know eyed his form and pretty face appreciatively, if not seductively. Even older men (some were even 30 or older) smiled and were a little too friendly to Harry.

And Dudley's friends were the worst, always trying to cop a feel whenever they came over. Harry shuddered as he remembered the time one of them (Lawrence Polkiss was it?) had attacked him while he had been napping in his bed.

Needless to say, Harry didn't like it one bit, and though it had been flattering at first, he'd soon grown tired and annoyed by the constant flirting and sexual innuendos (which also qualified as flirting.)

Harry started when he heard a loud crack from upstairs, and a muffled thump. He dropped the can opener he had been holding and whipped his wand out of his belt thing.

((A/N: um, he walked inside the house while he was thinking…))

Harry dashed up the stairs, arching an eyebrow when he heard someone cursing vehemently, he ran even faster up the blue carpeted staircase and came to a halt outside his bedroom door. The cursing was still continuing, and the voice uttering…no, almost screaming the expletives, was strangely familiar.

Harry opened the door quickly, and prepared himself for an attack.

What he saw nearly made him drop his wand.

In the middle of the floor, a silver-eyed white llama was sitting and looking incredibly pissed.

'OKaaayy...There's a llama...In my bedroom...oh fuck, what is this? Some kind of an omen?'

Harry goggled at it, before stepping forward cautiously. The llama seemed to have a crazed look in it's eyes as it watched Harry.

" Potter?! Oh this is just fucking great."

Harry blanched and his hands fell limply to his sides as he stood gaping at the llama…it had spoken! Bloody Merlin, what was going on? And that voice…

Harry's leaf-green eyes widened dramatically as something registered in his mind. The llama, it had…Malfoy's voice…

'No.Fucking.Way.'

Harry gaped at it, while the llama looked even more thoroughly pissed. It even seemed to scowl when Harry started laughing.

" Malfoy?!" Harry couldn't hold it in any longer, and he dissolved into hysterical laughter. Draco the Llama huffed.

" Shut-up Potter, this is NOT funny."

" First a ferret, now a llama..Oh god, this..is..too good…did you..become an animagus? Merlin's balls, this is..fucking funny.." Harry fell to his knees, laughing and holding his stomach as Draco fumed.

'No way I'm telling this stupid Gryffindork that my father turned me into a llama…damn, I didn't mess up the initiation THAT bad did I?'

Draco shuddered slightly, and pushed that recent memory out of his head as he strutted over to Harry, who was still laughing like a hyena.

Harry yelped when a hoof came in contact with his stomach, but didn't stop laughing.

" Dammit Potter! Shut-up! Where are we?"

" Little Whinging…" He paused to let out a few giggles and get some breath. " Number 4 Privet Drive.

((A/N: Dunno if I spelt Little Whinging right))

Draco sat down on his haunches weakly.

" Little Whinging?"

Harry laughed and nodded.

" I can't stay like this…do you have a fireplace?" Draco sighed, inspecting one of his hoofs.

Harry nodded, before realizing Draco's intentions.

" Sorry stupid, muggle fireplaces aren't connected to the floo network."

" Shit…and don't fucking call me stupid, I most likely have a much higher intellect than you."

" Whatever, where were you intending to go?"

" None of your business Potter."

" Fine."

There was a pause, while the two just surveyed each other. Harry grinned...rather creepily in Draco's opinion. The latter huffed in annoyance.

" Fine, I need to get to Hogwarts, seeing as Professor Snape will undoubtedly have a cure. Now stop looking at me like that."

" Alright, well…bye then, you can just walk there."

Draco the Llama gaped indignantly at Harry.

" No way in hell am I walking all that way!! Do you have any idea how long that will take?! Not to mention how much pain my feet...hooves will be in, and I have no fucking idea how to get there, I'm in unknown territory here!!"

" Well you probably won't survive a day out on the street, especially as a llama" Harry couldn't help but snicker. " And no way am I letting you stay hear so I can clean up your stinking llama shit...you know, it doesn't help that Hedwig is injured and my broomstick is being rid of the curses someone put on it last year..."

Draco let out an indignant squawk and stood.

" I am toilet trained for your information, and I am so much more mightier than you."

" And I care because…."

" You're taking me to Hogwarts."

So, next chapter, we get to read Draco's story and how he became a llama and ended up in Harry's bedroom of all places.

Please review…please?? I need to know if I should continue this.

Valentine

ps: If you do want an update, it may take awhile seeing as I haven't written it and I'm going camping this Sunday…;;