Warning Ron and Harry are already dead. So, don't read if anticipating trio hijinks
Disclaimer:Potterverse ain't mine. But ummm, I can play right? And I should add. I love How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days and I am gaining inspiration from that as well.
Author's Note Thanks to lj userinell for the quick Beta. And apologies for the length between updates. Will try not to let that happen again, but I lost a harddrive with the outline.

Summary: Set Post-Hogwarts, Hermione lost everything at Voldemorts final defeat, including her sense of humor. When Fred and George play an innocent prank on Ginny's boyfriend, a wager ensues. Can Hermione beat the twins at their own game?

This fic is being written in response to CosmicaBlacks' title challenge on Fictionalley Park.

---

Day Seven: Contagious Frivolity

Hermione turned over, the sunlight having blared through her dream state and roused her to consciousness. Groaning, she reluctantly opened her eyes and looked to the other side of the bed. 'Thank goodness, I'm alone,' she mentally exclaimed with relief.

Her dreams had been mildly disturbing, though a welcome change – the image of the final battle having not haunted her sleep. Sitting up, Hermione stretched, clasping her hands together and reaching up over her head, welcoming the stretch in her shoulders. As she lowered her arms and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, the witch turned to the clock on her bedside table.

'Ten a.m.?' Hermione could not remember the last time that she slept so late, although considering the stressful events of the past few days, she could not deny that the sleep had been well deserved.

Padding her way into the kitchen, Hermione retrieved her favorite coffee mug and set a pot to brew. As she inhaled, the scent of percolating coffee summoned a smile to her face. Pulling out an egg, cheese and some bread, Hermione set about preparing herself breakfast.

Though many things in her life had changed the moment she'd stepped on the Hogwarts Express, certain routines had stayed with her over the years. Taking the time to have a proper breakfast and recuperate on the day known as Holy in her youth was one of those time honored traditions.

And so it was with great surprise, that as Hermione was enjoying a quiet breakfast, a voice coming from the fire in the study interrupted her solitude.

"Not today, Alicia," Hermione ground out. She thought that she had made her position quite clear and could not believe the gall of the witch to interrupt her like this. As she sipped her coffee, Hermione nearly choked as she heard the sound of footsteps approaching the kitchen.

"Good morning, 'Mione," Alicia called out cheerfully holding a bag in her hand. "I had thought to bring pastries, but I see that you've already secured breakfast."

Hermione looked up irritably at the witch. 'What is her problem?'

"Alicia, I thought that we'd come to an understanding. I'm not willing to carry this nonsense into Molly Weasley's home. I wish that you would…"

Hermione was cut off as Alicia waved her hands dismissively. "Of course, Hermione; it was wrong of me to suggest anything to the contrary last night, and for that I apologize. I just hoped that we could consider what we were going to do for the remaining three days. As surprised as both Fred and George are by our new found relationship, I'm sure you'll agree with me when I say that it's not much of a prank."

Sighing, Hermione realized that she could not argue with the witch, especially after revealing that for all intents and purposes, there were only two days left with which to execute as she would be in Bristol with Remus tomorrow. "Of course," Hermione said reluctantly, summoning another coffee mug from the cabinets before asking, "Coffee or tea?"

Hermione reluctantly settled back down to the table after obtaining a third cup of coffee for Ginny, whom Alicia had flooed as soon as Hermione had consented to their conversation. Her two companions had a multitude of ideas how to truly shock the twins on the final day of the wager and Hermione sat by, listening with little enthusiasm.

"Well, Alicia, perhaps you could call Angelina, I know the four of you used to…" Ginny started before she was interrupted by a very outraged Alicia.

"Ginevra Weasley! Even I wouldn't sink to that level! Whatever my problems are with your brothers, Angelina has worked through them. I'm not going to ask her to compromise their marriage like that," Alicia said with finality.

Hermione silently chuckled in relief. It was actually quite reassuring to see that at least one other person had some limits set as to the lengths they would carry this.

"Although," Alicia said with a wicked grin. "I'm quite certain that Fred and George would be more than astounded to find out that it was not Hermione here, but their little sister who held my affections."

Hermione watched in disbelief as an obviously familiar exchange occurred between the two witches. Ginny allowed Alicia's hand to linger just a hair too long, before slapping it away in rejection of the idea. "While we might realize that I'm an adult, all of my brothers have a tendency to forget that fact. I'm not anxious to have six…" Ginny's voice dropped off as she absently forgot the loss of her closest sibling.

An uncomfortable silence fell upon the table as they all were drawn back to the memories of friends and families that had sacrificed their lives. Despite the renewed hope that had been left in the wake of tragedy, there was an undeniable hole that had been left in the hearts of many throughout Britain. Hermione, not the least of those scarred.

"Well, perhaps," Hermione interceded softly, unwilling to allow the emotions of the past to overcome her while she was sharing coffee with Ginny and Alicia. "Perhaps, we could use Fred and George's protective nature against them," she offered meekly. "What if they thought that Alicia had stolen Colin from you and betrayed me?"

Alicia immediately was pulled out of her reverie by Hermione's suggestion. "That just might work. George's greatest fear is not my involvement with other witches, but finding a wizard to replace him," she said with a devious smile. "Besides, Colin has grown into quite a…"

Ginny looked warningly at Alicia before she could finish her statement. "If you think that I would consider for one moment allowing you to use Colin for this, you have gone positively nutters! Don't take this the wrong way, but your limitations when it comes to another witches wizard are somewhat limited, Alicia. Forgive me if I can't endorse trusting Colin to you wiles."

Hermione's eyes widened as she observed the interchange between the two. She had been under the impression that despite Alicia's protests to the contrary, the underlying objective of this whole scheme was to gage George's interest, as the witch had not been with a wizard since she and George split during fifth year. But judging from the somewhat guilty flush on her face, it appeared that the witch had just been successfully in hiding her indiscretions from the Weasley twins.

"No, I think the element missing in all of this is Hermione," Alicia interjected, her words pulled mid-thought as her eyes focused on the brunette witch. "The wager is between Hermione and the boys, and when all is said and done with, we want them to have no excuse to contest her win."

Ginny's eyes sparkled as she looked from Alicia, to Hermione, and then back again. "If you are suggesting what I think you are, we might already be well on her way," the youngest Weasley replied. "Did you know that one of my brothers was seen leaving Hermione's boudoir, half dressed, the day before yesterday and it was well after noon," Ginny added with enthusiasm.

Hermione glared warningly at Ginny as she stammered, trying to explain the circumstances that had led to George waking in her bed, but it was no use as her co-conspirators carried on animatedly without her.

"And I had thought that George's obvious displeasure yesterday, was because of me," Alicia said, a smirk on her lips. "Perhaps I underestimated your powers of seduction, Hermione."

The whole scene was a bit too much on Hermione as she considered the sadistic delight the two witches seemed to take in the idea of Hermione leading George on only to declare her feelings for Alicia. Undoubtedly, his other half would jump in to defend his brother's feelings, thereby ensnaring both twins in their trap.

Her protests were met on deaf ears and so Hermione settled instead on chasing them out of her flat. The excuse of work was a reliable one for Hermione, one that any that knew her well rarely contested. And so it was with a sigh of relief that Hermione watched both witch's disappear into the hearth before putting up the wards to ensure no further interruptions.

Once she had been left to the peace and quiet of her own company yet again, Hermione attempted to do some further research into the Montgomery case file. Unfortunately, there was little for her to do. The case really was quite simple, they needed only to speak with the werewolf and the Gringotts banker. Although the goblins would be reluctant to surrender the estate to the rightful heir, there would be little they could do so long as informed parties were there to argue his case.

o.!

"Hermione, dear," Molly Weasley enthused, bustling towards the hearth at the Burrow as she pulled Hermione in for a quick hug, before dusting her own robes free of the soot that Hermione had yet to brush off. "So good to see you," she said with a hurried smile before bustling back into the kitchen.

Hermione laughed. Molly Weasley was one of the comforting constants in her life, a line of continuity between her life before and after Harry and Ron's deaths. Her love was simple and genuine, though often rushed as she flitted about tending to all those around her.

Removing her cloak - she preferred not to get her clothing covered in soot when traveling by floo - the witch made her way to the closet, making herself at home as she wandered through the house and into the gardens in search for the other siblings.

As she stepped out into the bright sunlight, Hermione smiled at Percy and Penelope before nearly being knocked over as something tackled her ankles.

"Billius," Penelope exclaimed, chastising their son as she crossed swiftly to pick up the toddler, apologizing to Hermione as she scooped him in his arms.

"Now, apologize to your Aunt 'Mione," Percy said sternly as he looked down upon his son, much more like his twin uncles in temperament than his father. "That wasn't nice."

Hermione looked upon the young freckled face and giggled. "I think that Billius just wanted to show how much he missed me, didn't you?" she asked, her smile warm as she waved off Percy's lecture. "And I must say, that I would be honored to be knocked off my feet by a wizard as handsome as this," she added with a wink as she accepted the struggling tyke from his mother's arms, spinning him around in the air before pulling him in for a crushing hug.

"Oye 'Mione," a voice sounded her ear, as Hermione felt her waist encircled by a pair of strong freckled arms. "Am I to believe that you would prefer my nephews charms to that of his older, and more handsome, uncle?"

Hermione flushed at the sound of the familiar teasing voice. While she had rebutted George's teasing innuendo the morning he had woke in her bed, she had known deep down that it was simply a joke to him. But, the feel of the arms around her waist, brought back to mind the ghosted image of his freckled shoulders as he sat up in the bed, pulling himself into wakefulness.

"Uncle Fred," Billy's squeal of excitement pulled Hermione out of her memory and she flushed deeper at the realization that not only had she found herself considering the physique of Ron's brother. The touch of Fred, not George, had been enough to evoke the memory.

Allowing Billius to climb over her shoulder, anxious to pounce upon his uncle, another voice sounded, adding to Hermione's private humiliation. "I'm afraid that she will have to settle for your facsimile," Angelina's husky tone rang out as she entered the garden carrying Ronald James, "I've the misfortune of being the only witch subjected to your charms, Fred Weasley," she chided as she walked over to Hermione, kissing her lightly on the cheek.

The afternoon carried on quite light heartedly, Hermione happily chatting with Penelope, Angelina, Ginny and Percy – as he couldn't bear his brother's company for too long – while the twins and Colin carried on with Billius. They transfigured small rocks and sticks for his amusement, before Fred swept him up onto his old Cleansweep – Percy had made it quite clear that he would have his head were he to put his son on anything faster again. As the witches and Percy gasped, watching Billius held tight against Fred as his uncle commanded the broom into a series of spins and shallow dives, the toddlers laughter rang out, only to be silenced when Molly came out to announce dinner, screaming instead, "Fred Weasley, bring him down here this instant!"

After dinner the adults settled down for a cup of tea as they chatted idly. It wasn't before long before Molly Weasley excused herself. Preparing for their weekly dinners was a tiring task, quite often leading to her early retreat for bed. The next retreats were as predictable as the others. Taking advantage of Hermione's presence and love for children, the young couples often stole away for an hour or two of quiet time, leaving Hermione to babysit, George opting to leave as well, seeking whatever entertainment a young bachelor might find on a Sunday evening.

Oddly enough, on this evening, George decided to remain behind moving to sit beside Hermione after his siblings and their partners had left. "Hermione, I wanted to apologize," he said, in an uncharacteristically humble tone. "I had no right to barge into your flat like that…"

As his voice trailed off, Hermione looked at him curiously. She'd never heard the twins offer such an unconditional apology before, always preferring to laugh or joke their way out of any transgression. Too astonished to reply with any more elegance, Hermione simply said, "It was nothing George."

With that behind them, the two turned their attention on the infant and toddler that was left in their care. Time slipped by them as they rolled about on the floor, allowing Billy to climb on each of them, using them as various animals for his riding pleasure, and flying Jamie – as calling Fred's son Ron was entirely too painful for the family – about through the air as Billy reached up to tickle the babies toes, delighting in the peals of laughter.

It was after Hermione was burping Jamie on her shoulder, George having just returned from carrying Billy up to Percy's old room to await his parents arrival, that she sensed George's gaze upon her. Rocking back and forth slightly as she patted the infants back, Hermione screwed up her face slightly as she looked at George. "What is it? Don't tell me that you've somehow managed to slip one of your new products to me over the course of the evening, George Weasley," she asked, her voice stern yet playful.

George laughed lightly before sitting next to Hermione and extending his hands to take his sleeping nephew from her arms. "I was just thinking how lucky we all are that you're in our lives," he said with a curious smile as Hermione carefully placed Jamie in his arms.

"I'm sure. Who else would be insane enough to watch one of the Weasley twins' children," she asked chuckling lightly before warning, "careful with his head, that's it."

"Hermione Granger, I've been changing nappies since you yourself were in them," George replied indignantly as he rose from the couch, heading to the stairs to lay the baby down.

"You forget that I'm a year older than Ron," she laughed, "which makes me only a year younger than you!" George shook his head as he carried the sleeping infant upstairs, only turning his head to mouth, "Shhh," warningly.

When he returned, Hermione was still laughing at George's exaggeration, only quieted when he looked at her again. "It's good to see you laugh. Ron would be happy to know that you could still smile at the mention of his name."

Hermione's mouth clasped shut, as her hand flew to her mouth. She'd been so caught up in the playful mood of the evening – the energy of the children was contagious – that she'd not realized when she'd spoken Ron's name. "I didn't mean. I'm s- sorry…" she said softly, feeling guilty for her lighthearted mood, forgetting even for a moment those that she'd left behind.

George pulled her hand from her face before smiling. "Don't apologize Hermione. It would be a shame if all that there memory brought you was pain. You all meant so much more to each other," he said with a smile as he squeezed her hand gently.

Hermione nodded, acknowledging emotionally as well as mentally for the first time the wisdom in those words. "They did love to horse around, my parents too," she said as a grin formed at her face. "All of them, I have such great memories of chess, bridge – Muggle card game," she explained at the puzzled look on George's face. "Even watching the boys carry on about Quidditch…" she said her voice trailing off at the memory of watching them huddled in the corner of Gryffindor common room, Ron's chess pieces demolishing Harry's as they played Wizard's chess.

"Well then," George offered as he clapped his hands on his jean clad thighs. "How about a game of chess?" he asked playfully. "If you're lucky, perhaps my dearly departed brother will find a way to channel some of his expertise. I can assure you that you will need it."

Though a part of her cringed at the frank way that George spoke of Ron's death, another part, one that had long been bottled up broke free. "And just what makes you think that I need assistance, George Weasley? I assure you that I have been playing chess since I was a young girl. Muggles do play the game as well, you know?" she asked arching an eyebrow in challenge.

"That might be the case. But, you did not grow up playing against Ron, now did you. As I'm sure you can imagine, my incentive at mastering the game was significant. I couldn't allow ickle Ronnie-kins to best me without a fight?" he asked, the twinkle in his eyes the same as it had been in Diagon Alley before third year, teasing Ron about making Prefect.

o.!

When Ginny Weasley returned home, a grin crossed her face at the sight of Hermione asleep, her head on George's shoulder. Checking the time and hoping that it wasn't too late, she grabbed a handful of floo powder, before crouching down and tossing it into the fireplace. Sticking her head through the fire, she focused on the correct grate before calling 'Remus Lupin' !