Helena looked at the stars. The city was covered with lights from buildings and cars. Thousand of images had been flashing all day in her head. Confusing images. Images that made no sense. The last thing she remembered was that she didn't like the amazon and the fight at the water treatment plant. And now, every time she saw her she felt affection and gratitude....that confused her. It was like she had been nowhere the last days.
"What are you thinking about?" Diana's voice surprised her. She had wandered out onto the balcony to find her there, her long form lazing indolently against the low wall, back nestled against the gargoyle.
"Eh?... Nothing, I just feel a bit tired," Helena mumbled avoiding her look. The amazon had a impressive presence. Maybe it was her height, her strong body, her beauty; something about her make Helena feel respect for her at first sight.
"Well, the past few days have been difficult."
"Yes, that's what everybody said."
"I want to thank you, for saving my life." Diana looked for her gaze.
"I need to thank you too." She looked her quickly and immediately turned her face to the city.
"Why?" Diana raised her brown.
"Dinah... Barbara, Alfred told me that you helped me..."
"But it's... because they told you or because... you feel it?" Diana asked, smiling. She understood Helena was hiding herself again.
"Feel?"
"I came here to thank you because I feel it," the amazon explained with a soft voice. "Why are you thanking me? Because Dinah and Barbara told you what happened? Or because you feel it?"
"Princess..."
"Diana."
"Okay, Diana, I don't remember," the brunette said, almost exasperated "Well, yes... I remember a bit, but it's all muddled in my head."
"I remember that I discovered a marvelous girl."
"I acted like a fool, please!" Helena rolled her eyes and stood up. "Don't joke with me!"
"That's not true!" Diana faced her. "You escaped from here to help us, and you really did it! You saved Dinah and later saved my life! The potion couldn't hide your love for the peole that you love and your heroic heart." Diana touched her shoulder. "The connection between you and Barbara impressed me. You followed her all day. You were much stronger than her and even knowing that, you always respected her. You could have easily killed her when she fell in that hole at the zoo to help you; and you didn't. You tried to protect her from me because you thought I was dangerous. You say you acted stupidly, that's not true. We saw the best of you."
Helena was embarrassed. She didn't like people to talk about her.
"Barbara was desperately trying understand you, trying to communicate with you. It frustrated her that she couldn't do it. I saw her so many times just sitting with you... She loves you so much, maybe more than you can imagine." Diana smiled. "You must feel grateful for her."
Helena locked her eyes on Diana's for the first time. "I am, I really am..."
"I know it, I saw it."
Helena shook her head. "Sorry, Diana; I know sometimes I'm a bit rude but... well, I'm that way and... about the last days, I don't know what happened..." Diana's voice confused her, it had something; it was kind, soft, her tone was familiar. The brunette struggled to place it.
Diana took her magic lasso and began to play with it. "What do you remember?"
"I felt scared... alone... I needed to run away..." Helena tried to order all her thoughts. She sat on the balcony. "And later... I remember being here... and it's all confusing..."
"What else?"
"Just images, but I can't connect it, it's all so blurry."
"Are you afraid to remember?"
"Of course not... why would I be...?"
"Because maybe you feel afraid to accept what do you feel." Diana gave her the lasso, in her fingers she was holding a knot that Diana had made.
Helena looked it strange. "What the...?" Suddenly she took it and slowly began to play with it until she undid it. When she finished, she looked at the rope in silence a few seconds and raised her eyes to the princess. She blinked. Now it was clear. "You...?"
"I was just trying to understand you. And be sure of this: it was easier to be your friend in then than now." She smiled.
"I was angry...mad at Barbara... and I felt sad... and alone." Helena moved her hands nervously. "It's confusing..."
"What else?"
Helena looked at her "We... were in my room, You made me feel... loved. Barbara walked in later..." Helena mumbled looking at the lasso. "She taught me to undo the knot... for that reason I knew how undo it at the..."
She looked the princess, who smiled at her with the most beautiful smile that she ever had seen.
"You made me feel better," she added "safe, many times..." She remembered her look, now most clearly. She remembered her talking to her long time; watching the stars in that same place. Teaching her simple things. "Thanks..." Helena said to her.
Diana loved to hear those words; she knew it came from her heart. She took her chin and raised her head. She looked at her in silence a few seconds. "You are like him."
"I'm not like him!" the brunette said angrily. She walked to the other side of the balcony hugging her arms.
"But you are," Diana said to her gently. "You have his inner strength; his determination and stubbornness; you have his love for this life; for this city. I fought with him so many times..." She walked toward the girl. "He was very smart, a good man; he saved many lives including mine. Sometimes we talked too; I didn't approve of some of his methods and he didn't approve of some of mine."
Diana observed Helena; she was watching in silence the lights of the city down below her. She wasn't answering, but she wasn't saying anything to discourage the topic, either. It encouraged her to push a bit more.
"He said I was very patient; he usually wanted to trap criminals. He often used the fear of Batman and the night to scare the villains. It was effective; many stopped their criminal activities for fear of the king of the night. The legends about him scared them. It was a fear that made hearts stop and blood freeze. I was against it. He was hard, implacable, impassive. You never saw him smile; his face was hard, never did her show emotion or feeling. It sometimes disgusted me. You could talk with him and you didn't know what he was thinking; if he felt comfortable with you, if he hated you; you couldn't read his eyes. You only could see his inexpressive face. That disconcerted me." Diana stood up next to Helena looking down at the city too "In my home, people like to express their feelings, you can read in their eyes and faces how they feel. Being with him was like being in front of a brick wall. He never let anyone see inside him."
The silence filled the place. A cold, soft breeze moved the hair off her face.
"But you were friends, very good friends." Helena suddenly said.
"Yes," Diana was happy to hear the brunette speak to her. "It was not easy, he didn't trust anyone. Our first meet finished in a big fight, if Superman hadn't been there surely we would have never stopped hitting each other."
"What happened?" Helena asked curiously. Her eyes were lost in the city.
"A mysterious girl named "Diana" and members of the Purge were making a weapons deal with several men. She was able to knock the Dark Knight to the ground. When he regained his composure, she had already escaped."
"He trapped a guy and he was holding him over a ledge on the roof of the warehouse demanding to know where Ra's Al Ghul was hiding" Dinana remembered "The man said that he would never betray "the almighty demon". I arrived in that moment with Superman. I quickly got into an argument with Batman over his methods of interrogation, while Superman tried to calm us. He was very rude; it disgusted me to see how he mistreated people. The fact that they were thieves wasn't a excuse to hit them so roughly."
"Well, I also think that they don't deserve much respect." Helena was surprised to discover that she thought in the same way.
"There are limits. I forced the thug to tell the truth with my lasso. But when he broke the man's jaw I almost hit him. Superman stopped me. You father was angry and defensive saying he was used to working alone..." Diana looked at Helena and raised her brow "Sound familiar?" (Trinity series)
Helena smiled lightly and looked at her. "Yes... so, he was difficult."
"As you... I confronted Ra's Al Gul's later, I got him, but suddenly he sent one of his thugs against me, Bizarro. I tried to fight, but, even with my quickness and strength, I was hardly able to budge him. I tied my unbreakable lasso around him, but amazingly he snapped it with ease. He really gave me a hard beating. I remember that I just tried to avoid his blows and protect myself but it was hard try to think, I thought for a moment that I was going to pass out; he was very strong and I couldn't fight anymore... he was going to kill me when he appeared. Batman. He jumped out of the shadows and hit him with a solar laser to the eyes. He saved me then, as you did it now..."
Diana laughed too. "Oh, I think so... "
"How could you be friends if he thought differently from you?"
"We usually had disagreements and fights, but we learned to respect each other. I think that the murder of his parents is a shadow that follows him always. It marked him forever. We began to trust in each other and we spent many hours talking about our life and problems." Diana turned her head to look at the girl. "He talked about your mom so much. He was in love with her. It was the first time that I saw him really happy. I don't know why they broke apart and I don't know her reasons for hiding your birth from him. I only can tell you that she was the only woman that he really loved."
"That doesn't matter to me." The brunette lowered her head.
"The fact that he is your father is something that you can't avoid." Diana said with a soft voice.
"I didn't ask for that." Helena grumbled almost defensively.
"The fact that you deny it, doesn't change things. You have his heart; It's part of you and you must learn to live with it. You have your own personality, but his shadow is always with you, your whole world had been built around him. He is your father, he loved your mother. The extraordinary woman that took care of you was his protégé and many things that she knows, He taught her it and she taught it to you."
Helena took a deep breath. She was right. And maybe knowing that she was right, annoyed her more. "You don't understand..." she mumbled.
"We can't be judges of our parents. They are not perfect, neither are we. Hating or being resentful against them doesn't change the facts. You have so much rage inside you. Your soul is so beautiful, maybe you can't see it but many people like Barbara, Alfred, Reese, Dinah and I could see it; don't destroy it with those feelings. We love you."
Helena kept silent without moving. There was a great sadness inside her. She wanted to change many things but she knew it was impossible.
They stood in silence for long minutes.
"We flew?" Helena broke the silence.
"Yes, very high." Diana smiled at her, understanding that she was trying to break the tension.
"I thought for a while it was a dream."
"Want to do it again?"
The brunette laughed and shook her head. "Don't joke with me."
Diana showed her hand to her. "Let's go, a fast one before dinner. Circe interrupted our last ride."
Helena hesitated. "I..."
"Hey, I'm not wearing a swim suit now, I'm dressed as a civilian, so you won't feel embarrassed by me." Diana saw her eyes, they were like small lights; her smile open and friendly; Diana knew the girl finally had opened her heart to her.
Helena took her hand and looked at it; she felt the same comfort that she had given her when she had felt lost. She could remember it all clearly now. The amazon had a special charm; Barbara had told her many times that Diana was an exceptional human being that filled hearts with her presence and made people remain calm in the middle of a storm.
"Do you know?" Helena said. "You are the closest to a God that I have ever been."
"I was once... but it's much better living and helping people to live in peace." Diana took her waist and Helena passed her arm behind her back. "Ready?"
Helena looked down. "I'm not sure now..."
The amazon jumped and flew into the sky. Helena marveled at the city under her feet. "WOW!!" she exclaimed. "This is great!"
"I told you..."
"Can I apologize for the "Hot" thing?"
"That was funny..."
"I'm feel really embarrassed about that."
"If I had a boyfriend like yours, I'd be... 'hot' too." The amazon smiled, watching the girl's face.
"He is cute." Helena noted.
"Very cute."
They disappeared in the black sky of the night.
I finally could connect with Helena. It was a nice and lovely night. The dinner was so funny remembering Helena's antics. We laughed all night. It helped Helena to clear her ideas. She started to fit some pieces in her mind and laughed too. Of course we hid some topics; like Dinah cheating or mocking her. It would not be good for Oracle's youngest charge for her partner to know all the details.
But I'm sure inside... that Helena remembered everything very well...
Dinah was preparing to sleep. She cleaned her face with a cream and closed her eyes to clean her eyelids; when she finished she opened her eyes and saw Helena leaning against the frame of the door looking at her and humming the Hakuna Matata song.
"Hey," the blonde greeted.
"Hey."
"What happened?" Dinah asked "I thought you had gone to your apartment."
"I came here to talk." The brunette closed the door behind her and walked toward her hands inside her pockets.
"Talk?" Dinah turned and frowned.
"Talk."
Dinah looked at her watch. Two Am. "It's late, what do you want to talk about now?"
Helena smirked and leaned over her. Her face a few inches away from Dinah. "Poptarts and marbles... that and other topics."
Dinah gulped. "Pop... tarts?"
Helena winked nodding; that strange smile was still on her face. "And waffles too...."
Dinah knew she was in big trouble and moved down Helena's arm to stand up to her side. "Well... I... Helena... I was just joking." Her partner had remembered everything.
"Joking? Oh.... I see..."
"Yes, all that was a game." Dinah stepped back. "We were playing, remember?"
Helena raised her eyes a few seconds thinking after looking at her "Sure... a "hairball attack.""
Dinah was in a panic she stepped back again. "Hey Hel, it was just joke..."
"I understand." The brunette smirked walking toward her.
Barbara turned off the equipment and prepared to go to sleep after a long and fun night. Reese had come too. Helena and Diana seemed to have developed a very good friendship and she felt very happy for that. It had been a nice dinner remembering the anecdotes about Helena and she was charming when she blushed. By the end, she was laughing as loud as everyone else.
A hand suddenly was in front of her holding the golden lasso with a knot on it.
Barbara smiled and took it. Helena remembered that night. Her protégé sat on the desk watching her. After a few seconds, Barbara undid the knot and gave the lasso to Helena, who examined it.
"Not too bad... 25 seconds. It took me just 20." The brunette said.
"Well you had more time to practice than I." Barbara winked at her. "Diana...?"
"Point for you."
"Well, finally you learned how to do it. That knot is one of the most difficult."
Huntress laughed. "Yes.. and was very useful, you have no idea. Now I'm going to give her back her lasso."
"Are you going to your place?" Barbara turned off the monitors.
"No, I'll stay here to say bye to Diana tomorrow, early, before she leaves."
"Not in my room." Barbara wheeled toward her room. "Sleep with Dinah."
"Dinah is going to sleep late. She is busy now cleaning her bathroom." Helena followed her.
"Cleaning her bathroom?? At 3 am? Why?"
"She took a bath and the bath overflowed."
Babara knew something was wrong. "And how the bath overflow?"
"She forgot to turn off the water while she tried to dry her clothes."
"Helena..."
"Yes?"
"What did you do to her?"
"Just what she asked." The brunette said with an innocent voice.
"Dare I ask?" Barbara glared at her.
"I gave her a choice between a cold bath or a good ass kicking. And she chose the cold bath."
"Why??"
"Maybe you have a bad memory but cats don't." She smirked.
Barbara rolled her eyes. "You two are kids."
"Can I sleep with you tonight?"
"No. You can sleep on the couch tonight."
"I don't like the couch, hurts my back."
"Nah."
Helena held her wrist with her hand. "But my hand and wrist hurt..."
Barbara took her hand "Let me see..." After a few seconds, she realized it was her hand that had been hurt. She raised her head and found Helena looking at her with puppy eyes. "Oh no!" the red head said pushing her hand to the side, gently. "That won't work now."
"What won't work?"
"You are not going to blackmail me with that." Barbara pointed to her and wheeled toward her room.
"I'm not purring anymore," Helena said.
"But you kick and snore." Barbara moved through the hallway.
"I don't snore."
"Yes, you snore." The red head moved her head.
"Barbara, please!" the girl pleaded.
"And you and I need talk later about some scratches in my wood floor."
"What scratches?"
Alfred smiled from the upper floor and turned off the lights in the ClockTower. He needed some sleep too.
I left the Clocktower the next morning. They are a nice family; I learned so much from this experience. They taught me how marvelous and how strong friendship could be, that sometimes it crosses the line of the reason. I learned that our best friends, our really best ones, will always be there, no matter how far we are; no matter if we don't talk often. They will always receive us with a smile.
The true friends that have a place in my heart are like small golden coins; never lose their value and every time that I touch them, they turned brighter.
I admire even more now the strength of Barbara, her determination, her courage to help others; I knew the nobility of Dinah, her clean and big soul; I knew the loyalty and incredible courage of Helena, how she had survived herself, her pain.
I just have one heart, and in it I must keep all my memories and feelings, but if I could have more hearts, I'd give one to each of those women and still all my gratitude couldn't be kept inside them.
They are the birds of prey, they are birds of heart.