So, at long last I'm back with another Lit. I believe that this might be one of the best things that I've ever written thus far (although you won't be able to tell until the first chapter). I like it, and all that I can do is hope that you do too.
This fic is what I like to call 'Rory-centric', it's a Lit, but most of the time it revolves around Rory and what her life is...or had been, rather. You'll understand what I mean in due time.
Now, I'm going to do all the obligatory things (i.e.: I disclaim!!... dusts off hands, I think I took care of that.)
And, this is Pg-13 right now. I don't really see it going to R, but there's always a possibility, although a very slim one, that it might.
The fic isn't a song-fic per-se, but it was inspired by the song below, and it's also where I got the title.
I'd like to tank Sami,who beta'd this chapter for me, You rock, hun!
So, now I'm going to shut up, and let you read. I hope you enjoy the Prologue to my new baby.
Jayde.
Free
And I watched you leaving
A silhouette of all the time we shared
And there's no reason
For you to turn around and come back here
I guess I knew that
You'd grow up to be the woman that you are
Now that you're leaving
I never thought the day would come so soon
But you gotta be free
To walk down the path of uncertainty
You've got to believe yeah
That you're gonna make it yeah
You gotta be free
To take the chances that you need to take
You've got to believe
That you're gonna make it yeah
I thought I saw you
Smiling at me from a billboard sign
I guess I'm looking
Just a little too hard
And I thought I heard you
Singing to me from the Broadway stage
And you were a queen that
Finally found her start
I can't deny that you're a dreamer
I watch you spread your wings to fly away forever
when you said goodbye I knew
you gotta be free
to walk down the path of uncertainty
you've got to believe yeah
that you're gonna make it yeah
You gotta be free
To take the chances that you need to take
You've gotta believe
That you're gonna make it yeah
I still remember when I
Looked Into your baby blue eyes
I remember thinking that you could be
What you want to be
Thanks for all your help dad
I understand why you're so sad
But there's a world out there for me
So I must be on my way
And you gotta be free
To walk down the path of uncertainty
You've got to believe
That you're gonna make it, yeah
You've got to be free
and I hope you're still believing
'Cause I know
that you're gonna make It yeah
and I watched you leaving
that you just got to be free yeah
Free, Brad Johner
Prologue: One Day
2007
".... Paris Eustace Gellar, Double Major in Journalism and English.... Amanda Jane Gibbs, Majoring in Child Psychology.... Lorelai Leigh Gilmore, Double Major in Journalism and Theater.... Jonathan Markus Griffith, Majoring in Early American History...." The speaker droned on as more students ascended the podium and received their diplomas...
2008
"Jess! Oh my God! You wouldn't believe who called me today!"
Jess Mariano looked over at his long time girlfriend perched on the end of the bed, her smile taking over her face, and her eyes bright with excitement. He set his papers beside him and looked at her. "Who called?"
"Pat." She grinned even larger as she said his name.
"Your agent, Pat?"
She nodded excitedly, her hair flowing wildly around her face. "Yes. He called, and do you remember the commercial that I made a month ago?" At his nod, she eagerly continued, "Well, apparently one of the big-wigs in a major casting company saw it when he was trying to find an actress to play a supporting role in the new Russell Crowe movie, and, well, he got in touch with the company that I did the commercial for, who, in turn gave him Pat's number." Her voice trailed off, as if waiting for a reaction.
Jess was speechless. He honestly had no clue what to say. "That's...." Clearing his throat, he tried again, "That's amazing! I'm so happy for you. So what happens, you go to their office to audition?"
"No, actually, Pat sent some of my other stuff to him, and he showed them to the producers, and the part's mine, if I want it." She smiled, her eyes sparkling. "And Pat e-mailed the script to me, I read over it, and.... Jess, the role is absolutely amazing. I'd be playing Sissy Spacek's daughter, for God's sake! She is one of the most amazing actresses in the business!"
"Wow... so, what are you going to do?"
"I want to do it. But... I'm still not sure if being an actress is the right thing, ya' know? I'm a journalist, and I'm a damn good journalist! But acting. That isn't a stable occupation. So... I'm still not sure if acting is what I really want to do. Do you know what I mean?"
"Yes, I do." Jess opened his arms, and she snuggled into them.
"I have until Sunday to decide, because filming starts soon, and the producers and everybody else want a table reading, some rehearsal time, and time to let the actors get to know one another, and since it's Friday today...." She shook her head and buried herself deeper into his embrace. "So how was your day?" She mumbled into his chest.
"Good, actually. I got offered a position teaching English at a high school."
"Really?" She sat up and looked at him, smiling. "That's great! Where?"
"Well, funny thing, actually...you know, there's this small town in Connecticut. Really odd people, and a grumpy guy that owns the diner there—"
"No way!" She laughed. "You got offered a job at SHH? So what did you say?"
"I have to have an answer by Monday. So I can think over the weekend."
"You should say yes." She closed her eyes for a moment, and nodded into his chest. Then she smiled.
"What?" He asked, feeling the curve of her mouth against his skin.
"Us."
"What about us?" He questioned.
"Just us. Back in Stars Hollow. Back where everything began. I think that it's a bit ironic that we've gone full circle."
"I guess...." Jess trailed off, his hand stroking her hair. "But what happens if you decide to take the role?"
She sat up a bit, "I don't think that I will. I mean, I think that the only way that I would do it is if you came with me to LA, because I don't think that I'd stay sane without you there. I think that it'll be better if we just move back home. And I got a job offer from the Hartford Chronicle which I was seriously considering, so...."
Jess looked down at the woman in his arms, amazed at what he had just heard. "You could be turning down a chance of a lifetime! How can you say no to it?"
She scrambled out of his arms, shocked by the vehemence of his statement. "How can I say no? Jess, how can I say yes? You'd be on the other side of the country, for God's sakes!"
"I won't let you throw away your dream just so you can be with me! I'm not that selfish!"
"I wouldn't be throwing away my dream! I'd be fulfilling one of my other dreams! And I'd be with you! How can you say that I'd be throwing my dream away?"
"Because...the rest of your life, you'd always wonder. 'What would my life have been like if I had taken that job?' And you'd probably watch the movie that you were supposed to be in, and follow the career of the actress that could have been you, and think 'if only...'. You know that it's true."
She was silent for a moment, letting the truth of his words seep into her soul. Almost reluctantly, she nodded. "Okay, so I would always wonder, but...." She trailed off as she stood up and started to pace, her bare feet sinking into the plush carpet. "I love you," she said as her eyes misted.
"And I love you. Which is exactly why I want you to say yes. I don't want you looking back a few years from now and hating me because I held you back." He pulled her down to sit beside him on the end of the bed, taking her hands in his, and looking her in the eyes. "And I'll always be here for you. Wherever you are, whatever happens, I'll always love you."
She nodded, "So, what happens to us? Because I don't think that I can do the long-distance thing with you. I mean, being with you but not actually being with you...that would be pure hell. I don't think that I could do it." She shook her head sorrowfully, her eyes misty yet again.
"Truthfully, neither do I," Jess replied as he brought one hand up to her face to catch the single tear that was rolling down her cheek.
She sniffed, and regained her composure a little bit. "So, what do we do? Do we...break up?" She voiced the thing that they both knew was coming, but neither of them actually wanted to put into words.
"No, but we... go on a break. We know that we love each other, but everything is screwed up right now, so we are temporarily not together. Does that make sense to you?"
She nodded. "So... I'll call Pat in the morning, then?"
Jess nodded in return. "And I'll call the principal."
"Good." She looked at him again. "Jess? We still have tonight."
Looking at her, he smiled softly as he pulled her into his arms, and raised her mouth to his. Just before he brought his lips down to hers, he murmured, "That we do."
He stood in the room where they had made love that night almost a week before, and he sighed. Right now she was on a plane, headed for the opposite side of the country, and he was finishing his packing so he could move back to the town where he had re-started his life less than a decade ago. Bending down, he rummaged underneath the bed for a moment, feeling the underside of the bed frame. Sighing when he had what he had been looking for firmly in his hands, he sat on the bare mattress.
Closing his eyes tightly, he squeezed the small velvet box that was in his hand, almost as if he were wishing it away even as he was holding on to it for dear life. Sighing again, he opened his eyes, and then slowly opened the box. Seeing the diamond that was framed by a sapphire on either side, he smiled sadly.
He had been planning to propose the night that they had decided to 'take a break'. Hell, he'd carted the ring around for over a year. At first he had planned to ask her to be his wife the day that she graduated University, then when she got her first job, and then on their fifth anniversary. He had never really gotten the guts to actually do it.
He looked at the ring again, and then out the window, at the sky, where he knew she was, somewhere.
"One day, Rory Gilmore," he murmured. "One day."
So?
J.