Hey Again! As promised, I have totally and COMPLETELY gone over
"To Go, Please" and revamped it! I'm so excited about all the
changes. If you're wondering why I would go back and strip
down this fic it's mainly for self-gratification. I didn't
really believe I reached my full writing potential with each
chapter so I cut a BUNCH and added even more. The changes aren't
as significant in the first few chapters but as the story
progresses and the plot speeds up considerably, it'll be like
reading a whole new story. I really hope those that were
fans of the previous version will appreciate this more
mature and hopefully better written piece.
Thanks so much for EVERYONE'S support in keeping me working
on this. I really hope you enjoy it; this story has become
more a part of me than any other in the 2 years I've spent
working on it.
Peace in 2004,
Adrial
Disclaimer: Don't own it, don't want it. I just write about it.
Fanfic: "To go, please."
Author: Adrial
Rating: PG
E-mail: adrial06yahoo.com
CHAPTER 1: ENDURANCE
Beyond the transparent glass of the bay window,
rays of seeking sunshine passed into the room,
adding a glow to the desolate mood within the it as
shadows danced mournfully across the walls.
My azure eyes deceived me with their cheery
blue depths as I viewed my reflection in the
mirror, pleading with it to dissipate before me
so I could view some semblance of the tortured soul
hidden beneath my calm exterior.
I longed to extinguish the vibrant glow of
my hair so I rumpled it with my fingers leaving
it in a mass of tangles.
Partly satisfied, I ventured across the cool
wooden floor and reached for my robe, which lay
wrinkled on my timeless dresser. My hand brushed against
a smooth picture frame and longingly traced
the image it held. Angrily, my other hand swatted
its partner as if chastising a child and my gaze was
torn away from the object and on to the navy
fabric of my robe. I shouldn't dwell on the past.
Sighing bitterly, I shook my self of any
signs of remorse and placed on my trusty mask of coolness.
It was just another day as me. I couldn't help
but fantasize about waking up one day in the body
of another person...someone other than myself.
But let's not get into my daydreams. They couldn't
comfort me now, anyway.
Subconsciously, my hands felt for the
toothpaste and I scrubbed my pearly teeth.
After cleansing my face, my feet led me to my
closet where I picked out a simple outfit without much
deliberation and exited the room to eat a breakfast
I was sure I wouldn't taste.
My eyes wandered over my half-eaten bowl of cereal
and lingered over my mother's coffee pot, still warm from
previous use. She was gone, I knew. She always left
before I got up, but left a scribbled note with
instructions for dinner and apologies for working late
that night or the previous evening.
I rarely saw her. Part of myself resented
that, but the half that was relieved at not having
to explain my desolate moods rejoiced.
Softly shutting the apartment door, I entered
the elevator and mechanically pushed the ground
floor button. My mother and I had moved into the
extravagant apartment complex in central Tokyo 9
years before. It was 74 stories, the largest in
the city, and because of its close proximity to
Juuban University, where I now studied to follow
in my mother's medical footsteps, I chose to
live at home--at least until graduation.
The charming lobby glowed behind me as I
breezed through the twirling doors, nearly knocking
over a giggling little girl who was prancing in and
out of them, evading her exasperated mother. I smiled
absentmindedly, recognizing the couple as one of my
neighbors, and gave a polite wave.
Like a robot, I weaved through the
condensed morning traffic on foot and approached
the bus-stop. The biting chill that had frozen the
sidewalk over night creaped underneath my coat and
through my skin, sending shivers relentlessly through
my body. I hugged my bookbag closer to my shoulder
and slipped on gloves.
At the corner of Lenox Street where I usually
caught the 8:00 bus, I sighed with relief as the giant
vehicle rolled into the stop, right on time for the first
morning in weeks.
The dreary interior did little to asuage the
winter morning's wrath, and my teeth chattered incessantly
as I searched for a seat in the overcroweded aisle. A small lady
rose to allow me to sit beside her and I greatfully thanked her
and sat.
She eyed my strained smile curiously and quirked a
silver eyebrow as she returned to the novel she'd been
previously reading.
Five minutes later, when my fingers had thawed and
I had removed my hat and scarf, my mind drifted to the day
which lay before me. Classes from 10 to 2, swim-team
meeting at 2:30, a late lunch with Usagi afterwards, senshi
meeting at the temple following that, and then...another
night alone. Lovely.
Finally, after 4 hard years of studying in
high school, I barged through college's front doors
and hungrily devoured any scholastic opportunities
available. The challenges of college expectations
forced me to push myself to the limit and the feeling
of accomplishment I received after a hard day of
educational studies made it all worthwhile.
But even that feeling could not smother the
immense cloud of loneliness aching in my heart.
"Excuse me," I mumbled dully as a man shoved
rudely passed our seat. I picked up the book he had
so kindly ignored knocking out of my lap and dusted
off the cover.
The interruption reminded me to push all
depressing thoughts to the farthest corner of my mind,
lest I enter my first class, Biology 101, and receive a
full interrogation from my lab partner and long time friend,
Mamoru, who would then proceed to blab to Usagi, who would
undoubtedly become glued to my side until I poured my heart and soul
out to her in a moment of utter weakness. The thought
made my stomach lurch.
I exited the bus at my stop and trudged into my
first class.
Throughout the day my classes went as usual.
I stayed alert for any vital information, scribbled notes
as they came, humbly smiled at the compliments given to
me by my professors, and left completely satisfied.
But what was satisfaction without someone to
be satisfied with me other than myself? The papers didn't
hug me and tell me "Good job, Ami." No amount of wishful
thinking would achieve that impossibility.
Not to say that my fellow senshi were anything short
of supportive. They were my best friends, my sisters.
I loved them, yet that sisterly love just didn't quench my
thirst for more.
At the end of my final class, my anatomy professor
hoarsely informed us that we were free to depart and returned
to his desk to grade our tests. On his table-top sat pictures
of his wife and two children. Even he had a life. Sometimes
school could be so depressing.
About an hour later, as I mentally reviewed the
information my swim-team coach rattled off to our team
at our final meeting of the season, my senses notified
me of the presence of anther person.
I pasted on a cheery smile at the bubbly face of
Usagi. She looped her arm through mine and animatedly
rambled about her day. My thoughts trailed elsewhere
as she babbled, but her abrupt silence ceased their
travels. She'd stopped mid-sentence when she realized
I wasn't paying attention.
"Ames...You there? Hellooo..Moon to Mercury!"
Her high-pitched screech left my ears ringing, and as
I snapped back to reality I couldn't help but giggle
at her puffed out face and red cheeks from her outburst.
"Oh, sorry Usa, I'm...a little out of it today."
Releasing the hold on her inhaled air, her faced
deflated slowly as she grinned sympathetically. "I'll say.
What's up? You've been really down lately. Anything
I can do?"
Her sincerity dented the wall of sadness that barred my
heart and my lips curved reluctantly into a genuine grin
to pacify her.
"Maybe we can talk later, Usagi-chan. Right now, I'm
starving."
Her mouth moved to protest but after seeing my pleading
eyes, she relented and opted to give me a sisterly hug and
assured me that it would be OK. My mention of food didn't
go unnoticed either.
"Fooood..." She sighed and tugged me harder into the
direction of a string of restaurants clustered conveniently
beside the campus green.
I sighed as well, though not out of anticipation.
I was slightly irked at myself for drowning in my own self
pity all day long. It wasn't like me to be so melancholy
for such a long time, but each time I tried to forget,
tried to push memories away, they came tumbling over their
lid with a vengance.
Usagi began relaying a story of about her father
doing something awful to embarass her at the market one
day, and I sucked in a breath as if I'd been abruptly
stung by something.
She instantly paused, taking her arm out of mine
and placing a hand over her mouth. Her eyes were wide, and
I stared at them for a moment, stealing a few seconds from
the world to relive a moment one week ago. The moment when
my father came back.
His shadow fell on the threshold of my apartment that night out
of God-knows-where begging to talk to me. He left my mother and
me when I was 10, and 9 years of pain attacked my soul with a
vengeance at the sight of his long-forgotten face. Letting my
emotions do the talking for me, I basically informed him that neither
I, nor my mother needed any more emotional trouble from him in our
hectic lives.
My eyes did not fail to see the look of sorrow flash in his
shimmering gray orbs and in that brief moment my body screamed at
my heart to let it jump at him and lash him to pieces for the pain
he caused, but my heart did not relent.
After he eventually left, my mother arrived home to find my
broken body racked with sobs and lying crinkled on the doorstep. She
rushed to my side and immediately asked what happened to me.
Through tears and a throbbing heart, I told her of my father's visit
and she comforted me with hugs and dry kisses against my head.
I felt quite content at that moment. That was until she decided
to drop the bomb.
"Ami-chan, what else has been troubling you lately?
You never talk to me anymore...I feel like you're avoiding me.
I miss you, sweetie," She cast her eyes downwards, "You know...
you keep going off all the time, and I worry about you."
I stared into her eyes at that moment and wished so badly
to tell her of the turbulent whirlpool of emotions that clouded
my mind--to tell her how much I longed for someone to love me--how much
I wished I could be normal with no responsibilities. I almost did.
And that scares me. But, it made me realize that I would never be
able to tell her about all my troubles because my identity as a
senshi could not be revealed.
I wanted to mend the broken bond between us, but all I could
do was let out a painful sob and flee to my bedroom...away from her
pain-stricken face.
I know she cried. I cried. I cried for my mother whom I had
lost my bond with, my father whom I never knew and probably never
would know...and my eyes left pools of moisture on my red face for
the image in the picture frame--he left me, too--and as much as
I'm ashamed to admit it, I cried for me.
I never asked for any of this. It was chosen for me before
in a life that I can hardly remember. I am the pretty sailor suited
soldier, Mercury, destined to protect Princess Serenity. I know it
sounds horrible, but sometimes I wish I never found that black feline
that fateful day. Ever since, I've been battling malicious youmas and
evil witches knowing that they'd never cease in their thirst for
destruction.
But, if my wish did come true and I was stripped of Mercury's
power, who would I be? After all the smoke lifted and I was able to
inhale the sweet air of peacefulness knowing that I wouldn't have to
become Sailor Mercury again, what else would be left? Without
Mercury I'd be nothing but plain old book-worm Ami. I wanted more
than that! I wanted to be more than that.
Part of me screamed to be set free from this prison of
predictability. I wanted to have someone who was able to unleash
the sweet, affectionate, spontaneous side of me. In truth...
I wanted what Usagi and Mamoru have.
Well, who doesn't? Wouldn't you? Imagine...a love you didn't
even have to work to get? It just popped up like a rabbit out of a
hat and you were blissfully happy together.
Oh, but who am I kidding here? Of COURSE they worked for it.
They died countless times for each other and waited a millennia to be
rejoined. I am happy for them--it's just...God, I envy their love
so much. At least the others are dating. I can't even get a second
glance from most guys--probably because I don't stay around long
enough to see if I will.
Forced to release my thoughts into the crowded space in
my mind, I watched Usagi pull open a set of glass doors and
allowed the strong aroma of hazelnut and vanilla to waft into
my nostrils. A few students sat at various tables throughout
the room sipping mocha chinos while reading books or chatting
sociably with friends.
When the newly constructed Starbucks opened, Usagi
practically dragged us all into it, stating that on her visit
to America to see family, the mochas and cafe lattés had hooked her.
Needless to say, she saw little of her family that summer and a lot
more of the inside of a steaming cup of vanilla flavored caffeine.
It didn't take long for Rei and Minako and fall in love with
their hazelnut mochas or Makoto to order five vanilla frappachinos,
and so began our daily Starbucks ritual.
I eyed the menu while Usagi rattled off the orders of our friends.
Momentarily distracted from the menu by the yelp of laughter sounding
from a nearby table, my eyes ventured over the counter at our waiter
for the first time and pulled to an abrupt halt. As his full lips
stretched into a polite smile towards Usagi as she tried to sort out
the orders, my heart sped up wildly, beating as if I were running a
50-mile marathon.
Now keep in mind, I never give men a good looking-over, but...
this man was...amazing.
His honey-blonde hair fell sexily across his forehead to
accentuate his sea-green eyes. My spine tingled and I pleaded with
my eyes to stop their travel, but they would not oblige. His chiseled
chest could be seen under his uniform shirt and I almost began
fantasizing him without it on, but my thoughts were interrupted
by Usagi's voice, yet again.
"Ami, you spacing out again?"
I felt my cheeks flush crimson and I straightened myself
to look at her.
"Um..n-no, sorry. Just...trying to decide what I want."
That shouldn't be too hard...
My excuse seemed to satisfy her--at least for now--and
forcing my hungry eyes to gaze at something other than the
attractive male taking my order, I pretended to be reading the
menu over his head and mumbled my order of a vanilla espresso.
His rather inviting lips curved into another smile.
"Will that be for here, or to go, miss?"
"For here." The words left my mouth before I could put a
leash on them and restrain them and I quickly squashed the urge
to sit at a table and just watch him work all afternoon.
"I-I mean, t-to go." I managed to stretch my lips into some
semblance of a smile and retrieved my cup from his hands.
I could not ignore the sensation of total bliss that soared through
my veins as his long fingers brushed my own.
Did he just call me 'Miss'? The first male I'm attracted to
in forever and he thinks I'm OLD.
I shook the thought off and, turning abruptly,
walked briskly to the door snatching up a few napkins as I went.
"Hey, Ames! Wait for me!" Poor Usagi was carrying a
crowded tray of four beverages, and I stopped to help her
out before she and the drinks both toppled over.
I didn't know what came over me. I had seen attractive
men all over campus...why was I suddenly acting like a little
school girl? I almost wanted to giggle and skip down the
sidewalk and would have if it had not been for that blasted
voice again, interrupting my thoughts.
I think I'm going insane.
"So, Ami-chan. You wanna explain what just happened
in there?" Her sapphire orbs searched my own and she had
the look of knowingness that I soon came to fear.
"Usagi-chan? What do you mean?" I played innocent
and sipped my espresso.
"You know what I mean! The customers in there were
about to whip out their row boats so they wouldn't drown
in your sea of drool! Not to mention the babbling and
intense blushing. If I was crazy, I'd say you just got bit
but the LuuUUUUv Bug." She laughed at the look of pure
stupor that appeared on my face.
"You are crazy, for one. And for two, I did not
get bitten by any "Luv Bug" as you call it. There is no
such thing. I just...couldn't decide what I wanted," The creamy
liquid in my cup seemed much more inviting then her smug
smirks at the moment.
I reached up to tuck some hair behind my ears like I
always do in awkward situations.
"Uh huuh...reeeaalllly..." She placed an arm around my
shoulder,"Don't worry about it!" She wriggled her eyebrows
and leaned closer towards my ear, "His eyes were doing a
little 'wandering' of their own, too."
With that she took off giggling madly and managed to
almost run over a pedestrian. I stood stupefied for a few
seconds before chasing after her.
"Usagi! What do you mean, 'wandering'?! Come back here!
USAGI!"
Well? How'd you like so far? I really am enjoying writing it
and if you have any comments PLEASE e-mail me! I really want
to hear from you! Flames or compliments... all are welcome!
adrial06yahoo.com
UNTIL NEXT TIME! ja ne!
-Adrial
"To Go, Please" and revamped it! I'm so excited about all the
changes. If you're wondering why I would go back and strip
down this fic it's mainly for self-gratification. I didn't
really believe I reached my full writing potential with each
chapter so I cut a BUNCH and added even more. The changes aren't
as significant in the first few chapters but as the story
progresses and the plot speeds up considerably, it'll be like
reading a whole new story. I really hope those that were
fans of the previous version will appreciate this more
mature and hopefully better written piece.
Thanks so much for EVERYONE'S support in keeping me working
on this. I really hope you enjoy it; this story has become
more a part of me than any other in the 2 years I've spent
working on it.
Peace in 2004,
Adrial
Disclaimer: Don't own it, don't want it. I just write about it.
Fanfic: "To go, please."
Author: Adrial
Rating: PG
E-mail: adrial06yahoo.com
CHAPTER 1: ENDURANCE
Beyond the transparent glass of the bay window,
rays of seeking sunshine passed into the room,
adding a glow to the desolate mood within the it as
shadows danced mournfully across the walls.
My azure eyes deceived me with their cheery
blue depths as I viewed my reflection in the
mirror, pleading with it to dissipate before me
so I could view some semblance of the tortured soul
hidden beneath my calm exterior.
I longed to extinguish the vibrant glow of
my hair so I rumpled it with my fingers leaving
it in a mass of tangles.
Partly satisfied, I ventured across the cool
wooden floor and reached for my robe, which lay
wrinkled on my timeless dresser. My hand brushed against
a smooth picture frame and longingly traced
the image it held. Angrily, my other hand swatted
its partner as if chastising a child and my gaze was
torn away from the object and on to the navy
fabric of my robe. I shouldn't dwell on the past.
Sighing bitterly, I shook my self of any
signs of remorse and placed on my trusty mask of coolness.
It was just another day as me. I couldn't help
but fantasize about waking up one day in the body
of another person...someone other than myself.
But let's not get into my daydreams. They couldn't
comfort me now, anyway.
Subconsciously, my hands felt for the
toothpaste and I scrubbed my pearly teeth.
After cleansing my face, my feet led me to my
closet where I picked out a simple outfit without much
deliberation and exited the room to eat a breakfast
I was sure I wouldn't taste.
My eyes wandered over my half-eaten bowl of cereal
and lingered over my mother's coffee pot, still warm from
previous use. She was gone, I knew. She always left
before I got up, but left a scribbled note with
instructions for dinner and apologies for working late
that night or the previous evening.
I rarely saw her. Part of myself resented
that, but the half that was relieved at not having
to explain my desolate moods rejoiced.
Softly shutting the apartment door, I entered
the elevator and mechanically pushed the ground
floor button. My mother and I had moved into the
extravagant apartment complex in central Tokyo 9
years before. It was 74 stories, the largest in
the city, and because of its close proximity to
Juuban University, where I now studied to follow
in my mother's medical footsteps, I chose to
live at home--at least until graduation.
The charming lobby glowed behind me as I
breezed through the twirling doors, nearly knocking
over a giggling little girl who was prancing in and
out of them, evading her exasperated mother. I smiled
absentmindedly, recognizing the couple as one of my
neighbors, and gave a polite wave.
Like a robot, I weaved through the
condensed morning traffic on foot and approached
the bus-stop. The biting chill that had frozen the
sidewalk over night creaped underneath my coat and
through my skin, sending shivers relentlessly through
my body. I hugged my bookbag closer to my shoulder
and slipped on gloves.
At the corner of Lenox Street where I usually
caught the 8:00 bus, I sighed with relief as the giant
vehicle rolled into the stop, right on time for the first
morning in weeks.
The dreary interior did little to asuage the
winter morning's wrath, and my teeth chattered incessantly
as I searched for a seat in the overcroweded aisle. A small lady
rose to allow me to sit beside her and I greatfully thanked her
and sat.
She eyed my strained smile curiously and quirked a
silver eyebrow as she returned to the novel she'd been
previously reading.
Five minutes later, when my fingers had thawed and
I had removed my hat and scarf, my mind drifted to the day
which lay before me. Classes from 10 to 2, swim-team
meeting at 2:30, a late lunch with Usagi afterwards, senshi
meeting at the temple following that, and then...another
night alone. Lovely.
Finally, after 4 hard years of studying in
high school, I barged through college's front doors
and hungrily devoured any scholastic opportunities
available. The challenges of college expectations
forced me to push myself to the limit and the feeling
of accomplishment I received after a hard day of
educational studies made it all worthwhile.
But even that feeling could not smother the
immense cloud of loneliness aching in my heart.
"Excuse me," I mumbled dully as a man shoved
rudely passed our seat. I picked up the book he had
so kindly ignored knocking out of my lap and dusted
off the cover.
The interruption reminded me to push all
depressing thoughts to the farthest corner of my mind,
lest I enter my first class, Biology 101, and receive a
full interrogation from my lab partner and long time friend,
Mamoru, who would then proceed to blab to Usagi, who would
undoubtedly become glued to my side until I poured my heart and soul
out to her in a moment of utter weakness. The thought
made my stomach lurch.
I exited the bus at my stop and trudged into my
first class.
Throughout the day my classes went as usual.
I stayed alert for any vital information, scribbled notes
as they came, humbly smiled at the compliments given to
me by my professors, and left completely satisfied.
But what was satisfaction without someone to
be satisfied with me other than myself? The papers didn't
hug me and tell me "Good job, Ami." No amount of wishful
thinking would achieve that impossibility.
Not to say that my fellow senshi were anything short
of supportive. They were my best friends, my sisters.
I loved them, yet that sisterly love just didn't quench my
thirst for more.
At the end of my final class, my anatomy professor
hoarsely informed us that we were free to depart and returned
to his desk to grade our tests. On his table-top sat pictures
of his wife and two children. Even he had a life. Sometimes
school could be so depressing.
About an hour later, as I mentally reviewed the
information my swim-team coach rattled off to our team
at our final meeting of the season, my senses notified
me of the presence of anther person.
I pasted on a cheery smile at the bubbly face of
Usagi. She looped her arm through mine and animatedly
rambled about her day. My thoughts trailed elsewhere
as she babbled, but her abrupt silence ceased their
travels. She'd stopped mid-sentence when she realized
I wasn't paying attention.
"Ames...You there? Hellooo..Moon to Mercury!"
Her high-pitched screech left my ears ringing, and as
I snapped back to reality I couldn't help but giggle
at her puffed out face and red cheeks from her outburst.
"Oh, sorry Usa, I'm...a little out of it today."
Releasing the hold on her inhaled air, her faced
deflated slowly as she grinned sympathetically. "I'll say.
What's up? You've been really down lately. Anything
I can do?"
Her sincerity dented the wall of sadness that barred my
heart and my lips curved reluctantly into a genuine grin
to pacify her.
"Maybe we can talk later, Usagi-chan. Right now, I'm
starving."
Her mouth moved to protest but after seeing my pleading
eyes, she relented and opted to give me a sisterly hug and
assured me that it would be OK. My mention of food didn't
go unnoticed either.
"Fooood..." She sighed and tugged me harder into the
direction of a string of restaurants clustered conveniently
beside the campus green.
I sighed as well, though not out of anticipation.
I was slightly irked at myself for drowning in my own self
pity all day long. It wasn't like me to be so melancholy
for such a long time, but each time I tried to forget,
tried to push memories away, they came tumbling over their
lid with a vengance.
Usagi began relaying a story of about her father
doing something awful to embarass her at the market one
day, and I sucked in a breath as if I'd been abruptly
stung by something.
She instantly paused, taking her arm out of mine
and placing a hand over her mouth. Her eyes were wide, and
I stared at them for a moment, stealing a few seconds from
the world to relive a moment one week ago. The moment when
my father came back.
His shadow fell on the threshold of my apartment that night out
of God-knows-where begging to talk to me. He left my mother and
me when I was 10, and 9 years of pain attacked my soul with a
vengeance at the sight of his long-forgotten face. Letting my
emotions do the talking for me, I basically informed him that neither
I, nor my mother needed any more emotional trouble from him in our
hectic lives.
My eyes did not fail to see the look of sorrow flash in his
shimmering gray orbs and in that brief moment my body screamed at
my heart to let it jump at him and lash him to pieces for the pain
he caused, but my heart did not relent.
After he eventually left, my mother arrived home to find my
broken body racked with sobs and lying crinkled on the doorstep. She
rushed to my side and immediately asked what happened to me.
Through tears and a throbbing heart, I told her of my father's visit
and she comforted me with hugs and dry kisses against my head.
I felt quite content at that moment. That was until she decided
to drop the bomb.
"Ami-chan, what else has been troubling you lately?
You never talk to me anymore...I feel like you're avoiding me.
I miss you, sweetie," She cast her eyes downwards, "You know...
you keep going off all the time, and I worry about you."
I stared into her eyes at that moment and wished so badly
to tell her of the turbulent whirlpool of emotions that clouded
my mind--to tell her how much I longed for someone to love me--how much
I wished I could be normal with no responsibilities. I almost did.
And that scares me. But, it made me realize that I would never be
able to tell her about all my troubles because my identity as a
senshi could not be revealed.
I wanted to mend the broken bond between us, but all I could
do was let out a painful sob and flee to my bedroom...away from her
pain-stricken face.
I know she cried. I cried. I cried for my mother whom I had
lost my bond with, my father whom I never knew and probably never
would know...and my eyes left pools of moisture on my red face for
the image in the picture frame--he left me, too--and as much as
I'm ashamed to admit it, I cried for me.
I never asked for any of this. It was chosen for me before
in a life that I can hardly remember. I am the pretty sailor suited
soldier, Mercury, destined to protect Princess Serenity. I know it
sounds horrible, but sometimes I wish I never found that black feline
that fateful day. Ever since, I've been battling malicious youmas and
evil witches knowing that they'd never cease in their thirst for
destruction.
But, if my wish did come true and I was stripped of Mercury's
power, who would I be? After all the smoke lifted and I was able to
inhale the sweet air of peacefulness knowing that I wouldn't have to
become Sailor Mercury again, what else would be left? Without
Mercury I'd be nothing but plain old book-worm Ami. I wanted more
than that! I wanted to be more than that.
Part of me screamed to be set free from this prison of
predictability. I wanted to have someone who was able to unleash
the sweet, affectionate, spontaneous side of me. In truth...
I wanted what Usagi and Mamoru have.
Well, who doesn't? Wouldn't you? Imagine...a love you didn't
even have to work to get? It just popped up like a rabbit out of a
hat and you were blissfully happy together.
Oh, but who am I kidding here? Of COURSE they worked for it.
They died countless times for each other and waited a millennia to be
rejoined. I am happy for them--it's just...God, I envy their love
so much. At least the others are dating. I can't even get a second
glance from most guys--probably because I don't stay around long
enough to see if I will.
Forced to release my thoughts into the crowded space in
my mind, I watched Usagi pull open a set of glass doors and
allowed the strong aroma of hazelnut and vanilla to waft into
my nostrils. A few students sat at various tables throughout
the room sipping mocha chinos while reading books or chatting
sociably with friends.
When the newly constructed Starbucks opened, Usagi
practically dragged us all into it, stating that on her visit
to America to see family, the mochas and cafe lattés had hooked her.
Needless to say, she saw little of her family that summer and a lot
more of the inside of a steaming cup of vanilla flavored caffeine.
It didn't take long for Rei and Minako and fall in love with
their hazelnut mochas or Makoto to order five vanilla frappachinos,
and so began our daily Starbucks ritual.
I eyed the menu while Usagi rattled off the orders of our friends.
Momentarily distracted from the menu by the yelp of laughter sounding
from a nearby table, my eyes ventured over the counter at our waiter
for the first time and pulled to an abrupt halt. As his full lips
stretched into a polite smile towards Usagi as she tried to sort out
the orders, my heart sped up wildly, beating as if I were running a
50-mile marathon.
Now keep in mind, I never give men a good looking-over, but...
this man was...amazing.
His honey-blonde hair fell sexily across his forehead to
accentuate his sea-green eyes. My spine tingled and I pleaded with
my eyes to stop their travel, but they would not oblige. His chiseled
chest could be seen under his uniform shirt and I almost began
fantasizing him without it on, but my thoughts were interrupted
by Usagi's voice, yet again.
"Ami, you spacing out again?"
I felt my cheeks flush crimson and I straightened myself
to look at her.
"Um..n-no, sorry. Just...trying to decide what I want."
That shouldn't be too hard...
My excuse seemed to satisfy her--at least for now--and
forcing my hungry eyes to gaze at something other than the
attractive male taking my order, I pretended to be reading the
menu over his head and mumbled my order of a vanilla espresso.
His rather inviting lips curved into another smile.
"Will that be for here, or to go, miss?"
"For here." The words left my mouth before I could put a
leash on them and restrain them and I quickly squashed the urge
to sit at a table and just watch him work all afternoon.
"I-I mean, t-to go." I managed to stretch my lips into some
semblance of a smile and retrieved my cup from his hands.
I could not ignore the sensation of total bliss that soared through
my veins as his long fingers brushed my own.
Did he just call me 'Miss'? The first male I'm attracted to
in forever and he thinks I'm OLD.
I shook the thought off and, turning abruptly,
walked briskly to the door snatching up a few napkins as I went.
"Hey, Ames! Wait for me!" Poor Usagi was carrying a
crowded tray of four beverages, and I stopped to help her
out before she and the drinks both toppled over.
I didn't know what came over me. I had seen attractive
men all over campus...why was I suddenly acting like a little
school girl? I almost wanted to giggle and skip down the
sidewalk and would have if it had not been for that blasted
voice again, interrupting my thoughts.
I think I'm going insane.
"So, Ami-chan. You wanna explain what just happened
in there?" Her sapphire orbs searched my own and she had
the look of knowingness that I soon came to fear.
"Usagi-chan? What do you mean?" I played innocent
and sipped my espresso.
"You know what I mean! The customers in there were
about to whip out their row boats so they wouldn't drown
in your sea of drool! Not to mention the babbling and
intense blushing. If I was crazy, I'd say you just got bit
but the LuuUUUUv Bug." She laughed at the look of pure
stupor that appeared on my face.
"You are crazy, for one. And for two, I did not
get bitten by any "Luv Bug" as you call it. There is no
such thing. I just...couldn't decide what I wanted," The creamy
liquid in my cup seemed much more inviting then her smug
smirks at the moment.
I reached up to tuck some hair behind my ears like I
always do in awkward situations.
"Uh huuh...reeeaalllly..." She placed an arm around my
shoulder,"Don't worry about it!" She wriggled her eyebrows
and leaned closer towards my ear, "His eyes were doing a
little 'wandering' of their own, too."
With that she took off giggling madly and managed to
almost run over a pedestrian. I stood stupefied for a few
seconds before chasing after her.
"Usagi! What do you mean, 'wandering'?! Come back here!
USAGI!"
Well? How'd you like so far? I really am enjoying writing it
and if you have any comments PLEASE e-mail me! I really want
to hear from you! Flames or compliments... all are welcome!
adrial06yahoo.com
UNTIL NEXT TIME! ja ne!
-Adrial