A ten-year old boy with blond hair and a ridge covering his forehead and nose bolted down the hall, chasing a sixteen-year old boy with pointed ears. The older one came to an abrupt halt, as the younger one nearly collided into him.
Disturbed from her mediation, T'Pol stepped out of her quarters to watch the two momentarily. Her hazel eyes were surrounded by a few indiscernible wrinkles and shimmered with something akin to amusement. Tucking a medium-length strand of chestnut hair behind her ear, she stared at the boys.
"Lorian, Henry," she said. "What have I told you about this type of play?"
The younger one stuck out his lower lip and confessed.
"You said we shouldn't, Mrs. Tucker," said Henry.
T'Pol raised her eyebrow. "That's correct."
"I apologize, mother," said Lorian.
As if to excuse his actions, Henry said, "But, Lorian was in Dad's stuff." He pointed an accusatory finger at the pointy-eared kid.
A man in his late-fifties meandered down the hall and interrupted the scene. Age had worn heavily on him – his hair was nearly completely gray and his eyes had grown weary. The man glanced at T'Pol and then focused his attention on the two mischief-makers.
"What's going on?" Archer asked.
Lorian and Henry straightened, and nervously eyed each other.
"They were running in the hall," T'Pol said. And then clarified, "Again."
Trying to appear stern, the captain furrowed his brow. "Listen, boys, there's a lot of expensive equipment near this junction, and T'Pol and I don't want you to get hurt."
"So, is your concern for the expensive equipment or our safety?" Lorian asked in a slight drawl.
Archer smiled. "Uhm, I guess both. I want to make sure both Enterprise and you stick around for a while."
"Dad, Lorian's been reading your logs again," Henry said. The blond boy crossed his arms defiantly as if to defend himself.
"Oh?" Archer asked.
Henry's hand finger pointed at the Vulcan. "He retrieved them without your permission."
Archer stifled a laugh. His logs were no state secret; they were available for anyone to review, but obviously Henry felt he needed to warn his dad. Lorian had the best qualities of his dearest friends. The kid had Trip's genius with computers and engineering equipment, as well as the man's dangerous curiosity, which were balanced with T'Pol's methodical, wise, scientific and brilliant mind.
"Henry, these logs are open to everyone," Archer said, ruffling his boy's hair. "As long as you don't view or listen to my personal logs …."
Proudly the boy spoke up, "Thank you, sir."
Archer gave a wink and was about to walk away, when Lorian continued. "Captain, after listening to your recordings, I have some suggestions. I would like to have a word with you when it's convenient."
Bold. The captain wondered where that boldness came from. A chuckle nearly worked its way to his lips when he turned around and rewarded the young man with a serious nod.
"I'll meet you in my Ready Room today at 1800."
T'Pol nearly frowned, "Jonathan, you don't need to …."
The captain grinned and said, "Don't worry, T'Pol. I've always welcomed suggestions from the Tucker family."
He gave a purring laugh and was about to turn around, when his science officer interrupted him.
"Not always," she corrected.
Archer gave a snort and mumbled to them, "Maybe not always." And with that, he walked down the hall.
As worn boots clapped against the deck plating, he questioned whether T'Pol had known he'd always valued her opinion. In truth, he'd always valued her. But, maybe she was right – in the past he hadn't welcomed some of the things she had to say, especially in the expanse. After all, he had to do whatever it took.
Whatever it takes.
The words rang in his ears, haunting him. When he and his crew had vowed to save Earth roughly 16 years ago, he'd thought of only one thing: the mission … his mission. When it had proven impossible to complete, he'd fallen into a guilty cycle of researching and regretting every decision he'd ever made. The thought of not fulfilling his quest, possibly allowing Earth to be destroyed, had torn at his insides and rattled his brain. Rather than turn to his friends, he'd continued to shut them and everyone else out. In hindsight, he'd pushed Trip and T'Pol together by being emotionally and mentally unavailable to both of them. It was a mistake … and one of his decisions that bugged him most of all.
However, things had turned out well for the Tuckers. Trip had proposed to T'Pol in front of the entire crew after movie night, they'd married, and she'd given birth to Lorian. The summation of all the events had at least given Archer the impetus to move on. He'd, for the most part, agreed that Enterprise was never getting home and accepted he'd never be able stop the weapon. His crew had already formed a new life, it was time for him to do so as well.
Overall, he'd been lucky. One day, he'd spotted a ship in an anomaly field and had met a beautiful pilot with a ridge running down her nose and a mane of golden hair. She'd asked him to dinner aboard her ship and before the night was out she'd made the excuse to go back to her cabin, confessed her attraction, nipped at his mouth and wiggled out of her clothes. Archer'd been astounded. He'd been captain so long, he'd forgotten what it felt like to be a man … to be considered handsome and virile. And maybe that's what he'd liked most about her. That, and she made him forget.
Marrying her had given him a renewed sense of purpose. He had a new mission: captain, husband and astronomer. Soon father had been added to those responsibilities. And he had taken that role just as seriously and mirthfully as he had his other duties. In fact, in a way, he'd treated all the children born aboard his vessel as his kids. Travis' children, Hoshi's, Phlox's … they'd all been a handful and all special. He'd known they were the future of Enterprise and Earth – their descendents would be the ones who would stop the Xindi weapon from attacking in the first place.
But, tragedy never had been far away; Archer'd eventually lost his wife in childbirth while unsuccessfully attempting to deliver their third child. Raising two children hadn't been difficult – they were great kids, but he'd missed her. He'd enjoyed not just being a captain, a father to everyone; he'd gotten used to being a man every now again. When he'd slip into his cabin after a long day on the Bridge, and after his children – Henry and Elyssa – had gone to sleep, his wife had always lured him into her world by stealing kisses and vowing love.
Esilia.
A few weeks after her death, he'd realized his feelings for T'Pol had never completely vanished and that thought had sparked guilt. It still did.
At least he could become lost in his parental duties, the astronomical data collected and his crew's needs.
He made his way around the bend, entered his Ready Room and continued working.
Chapter 2An adolescent hand rang the button to a closed door. Lorian was nervous about talking to the captain; he'd always been a little on edge when speaking with the man. It was a combination of admiration and fear. He knew him to be kind and gentle, but also stern and abrupt.
Lorian's first encounter with the stern and abrupt man, had been a shock to his system. Before that day, he'd only been sweet and caring.
He remembered entering the gym to shadow box, as he had seen his Uncle Malcolm do on numerous occasions. After performing this feat, he migrated to the large machines, the ones his parents had asked him not to touch. Maybe that'd been the problem – warning the boy not to touch things was daring him to do so; he'd always been curious. With no one around, his 5-year old hands reached around the treadmill as he tried to start the device. It immediately hummed to life, throwing the boy to the ground with a hard smack, knocking a tooth out and sending a spray of green blood down his little shirt.
Captain Archer rushed over, witnessing the boy fall down. After picking the little guy up, he spoke in harsh tones, rather than coo.
"You could've done a lot worse than knock your tooth out, Lorian," Archer said, walking briskly down the halls.
Lorian looked up, as the man's eyes remained focused ahead. He was angry and maybe worried.
"I'm thorry," he said, his tongue unable to work against the newly found gap in his mouth.
"I know your parents have asked you not to touch those things. Why would you do something so stupid?"
"I was … curiouth," he said.
And then Lorian saw a tenderness come over, which in retrospect, was most likely amusement at the way the last word was spoken.
More softly, Archer said, "I just don't want to see anything bad happen to you. Maybe next time you're … curious … you can ask an adult to help you."
"Come in," Archer said, waking the boy from his daydream.
Lorian strode in and hovered near the door, his hands almost militaristically behind his back and his chest puffed out.
The captain couldn't help but grin. "Have a seat."
"No, thank you," he said. "Sir, I know you're time is valuable. I'll get directly to the point."
Archer leaned over his desk with interest, giving a bemused smile. "Sometimes I forget your only 16 … you have a way of sounding 30 …."
He gave a raised eyebrow. "I understand Earth will be in danger in approximately 100 years."
Stunned, Archer stared at the boy. "Yes."
"I presume our mission is to destroy the first Xindi probe?" he asked.
Archer nodded. "Yes. But, Lorian, you shouldn't really worry about this. A boy your age should be playing games."
"Vulcans don't enjoy games. Besides, my father told me a lot about Earth. In fact, he spoke fondly of Florida."
"Your father grew up there," Archer said.
"He told me. I take it, his family home and town were destroyed … at least will be?"
"Yes," said Archer. "Unless we're able to stop it."
"In your logs, you indicated that we can't travel forward in time."
"That's right. Your mother determined we can't," Archer whispered.
"Perhaps we can make friends with the Xindi?" Lorian asked. "Show them we're a peaceful people so that they don't attack us."
"Your mother and I have discussed this. She feels it may negatively alter the timeline. We meet the Xindi for the first time after the attack."
"My mother isn't always right," Lorian said. A trace of a frown littered his face.
Archer's eyebrows climbed onto his forehead. "No. She isn't always right, but she's right more often than not. And, being her son, you should show her more respect."
Lorian's lip fattened.
Archer climbed out from behind his desk and sat on the edge of it. With a hushed whisper he said, "I know you miss your father."
Lorian eyed the man. It had been two years, but the pain was still there – the emotion. The boy had an overwhelming love for his dad. Trip was the gentle parent, and his mother was the disciplinarian. Countless times, his father would tickle his stomach, sing softly in his ear before bed, tell wild tales to make him crack a smile and generally love him so much that he had the courage to tackle all of life's problems with confidence and zeal.
Archer decided to speak. "When my father died, I was devastated. It's not something you ever really get over, Lorian. I think your mom is trying to do the best she can, but … she can't really take his place. No one can."
The boy bit back a few tears and stared down at the ground. Archer hesitantly moved toward him and gazed down. Suddenly, Lorian felt Archer's hands on his shoulders as he'd seen the man do to his mother countless times before.
"Everyone misses him. He was one of my best friends."
The Vulcan broke the captain's hold, trying to stifle his emotions. The last thing he wanted to do was be a burden … actually, the last thing he wanted to do was cry, and at this rate, he was likely to do so.
"Thank you, sir," he said, awkwardly.
Archer sighed and allowed the boy to back away. "Your father had many friends on Enterprise. You have a lot of people to turn to who care about you. Maybe if you don't feel comfortable talking to me, you can talk with Malcolm."
Lorian stared ahead, looking at the porthole behind the captain, confessing something that came too easily to the surface.
Archer frowned. "I know it hurts. It's okay to honor your human side occasionally."
"Mother has encouraged me to accept his death. But, she doesn't understand …." The Vulcan turned his head toward the ground and tried to breath deeply, a trick he'd used to stymie unwanted emotions. After a few seconds, Archer broke the silence.
"Why don't you have dinner with us tonight? I know Henry looks up to you. And, you haven't finished telling me your thoughts about speaking with the Xindi."
Archer wrapped an arm around Lorian. Bringing the kid into the crook of his armpit, he headed down the hall.
The boy gave a slight smile. "Dinner tonight? Could you ask my mother, she's more apt to say yes to you."
"Maybe we can invite her too," he answered. "I'd love to see her. It's been a while since the Tuckers and the Archers had dinner together."
By the way he responded, Lorian got the distinct impression he indeed would love to have her over. He shook the thought from his head and decided it was his need to protect his father's memory that made that thought drift to the surface. After all, the two families were friends, and had been for years. His parents were the godparents of Henry and Elyssa and had been entrusted with caring for Archer's children on various occasions. The man even officiated his parents wedding.
'It's nothing,' he told himself, allowing the captain to continue down the hall with his arm around him.
Chapter 3Archer and his children cleared away dishes as T'Pol and the boy remained seated.
'Fifteen,' Lorian thought to himself.
During dinner, Lorian made it a point to count the number of lingering glances Archer held with his mother. Actually, the captain would look at her and continue gazing after she had already diverted her attention elsewhere. Even though Lorian was only half human, he knew this wasn't normal behavior between humans, who he'd studied and analyzed all his life.
The boy dug into his memory and realized something that startled him – something he should've noticed much earlier. The captain had looked at his first officer, holding his eyes on her that way, for years. In fact, Lorian had always assumed it was the nature of their relationship, but realized perhaps it was the nature of an unresolved relationship.
The Vulcan thought back on how his own father regarded his mother – he held the same stares, but more with a satisfied smile. That contentment may've come from a number of things, but probably because his feelings had always been returned. It also had a self-satisfaction to it, as if he was pleased to have her so completely to himself. The recollection gave the boy some comfort.
But, Archer? The look he'd given her tonight, and for years, was one of anguish. Lorian had seen many of Archer's expressions – irritation, concern, authority, confidence, impatience, curiosity, friendship and then this one. He knew the difference between them.
For example, when his eyes fell on his old communications officer, it was always a fatherly-like concern for the woman. He had a soft spot for her, but it was one of a doting parent or older sibling. His voice reinforced that notion. Another prime example would be the way Archer looked on his father. The captain held many things twinkling in his eyes – esteem, friendship, bemusement and a brotherly-like love. The soft punches to the arm, gentle rumble of his laugh and lopsided smile that seemed transfixed when his father entered the room was unmistakable and pleasing. It was obvious Archer cared for his dad quite a bit, maybe more so than possibly anyone aboard … anyone except his mother. When the captain saw her, Lorian could tell there were many conflicting emotions – concern, friendship, curiosity and a deep affection that tightened his lip and set ablaze a small fire in his eyes. It wasn't just his eyes. His voice softened and became husky. And, he'd listen to her more than anyone … even his father; she could tell the man he was wrong and he'd be likely to listen and accept it. The captain was brusque and abrasive with his staff when they disagreed, except her.
And, it seemed that had always been the case.
Lorian was young enough not to understand the command structure and asked his father for more information over a late night visit to the Mess Hall for some pecan pie.
"Why is mother the second in command, and not you?" Lorian asked, sweetly.
Trip guffawed, "Well, she's got more experience, being older and all." He gave his son a wink and a large grin.
When his father was playful, the boy couldn't help but grin back. But, he was determined to have a serious answer.
"Captain Archer trusts and values your opinion, doesn't he?"
Losing some of his merriment, his father's face straightened. "That's true, but your mom has a way of getting through to him. Always has."
"Lorian, perhaps we should leave," T'Pol said, stirring him from his musings.
"The kids do have school tomorrow," Archer added.
T'Pol gathered herself up and sauntered out of the room with Lorian following only slightly behind. As much as Archer seemed to view his mother with devotion and husband-like concern, she seemed wholly uninterested or unaware of his feelings. Well, maybe not wholly.
T'Pol said, "The captain indicated you disagreed with some of his decisions."
Lorian would've given his father a smile at the comment, but restrained himself for the Vulcan. She undoubtedly wouldn't approve of an open emotional display. Instead, he decided to nod weakly.
"I think it best you don't question the captain," she said.
Lorian raised an eyebrow. "You do, why can't I?"
"That's different. I'm his first officer. You're a very intelligent, inquisitive, intriguing boy, but a boy nonetheless. You can't understand the thought processes behind decisions he's had to make; hindsight never completely provides a clear picture of the past."
He gave a small frown as the two reached their cabin.
"You don't understand me. You never have," he said.
T'Pol sighed deeply. "I just want you to stop bothering him. He's a busy man."
The boy stared at his mother and furrowed his eyebrows. "Are you protecting him because he's your captain, or because you know he's in love with you?"
She gave him virtually the same expression – furrowing her eyebrows back. "I'm his friend. I cherish you, Lorian. My concerns regarding his time and the protection of decisions he's already made are as first officer. Nothing more."
"Are you completely unaware, or do you just refuse to accept it."
"It's best to leave this matter alone."
"You don't think I'm right."
She remained quiet.
Tired of being treated as a boy, he decided to end the conversation by changing for bed and going to sleep. Maybe in the night, he'd find evidence and prove his theory was correct. Maybe then she'd start taking him seriously.