AN: I AM SOOOOO SOOOOORRRRRYYYYYY! PLEASE FORGIVE ME FELLOW READERS WHO ARE STILL WILLING TO READ MY COW POOP!

sniff I was caught up with school work…. High school is a tough little critter… I am very sorry…

I will do my best to keep up with the story now that its summer, though I may get caught up again (PSAT/SAT/AP testing). Thank you to all the readers who still this!

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Pardon the Parody

Rin grinned up at Sesshomaru.

"Snowball, how do you think those two awkward couples are doing?"

'Snowball' raised his eyebrow.

"Are you playing matchmaker again, Rin?"

Rin looked down, pink on her face. He had guessed her thoughts again.

"No, I was just... yes…"

Sesshomaru sighed. Oh Rin, you'll never learn to leave people alone. But then again, he didn't really have a problem with that. It was, after all, how they met. Sesshomaru was walking in the park to relieve his stress, when Rin had suddenly popped up, and dragged him out to the local cow farm for a cup of milk.

After that, it was only a matter of time before the two got together.

He was interrupted out of his thoughts by a roaring, screaming, creaking sound. Looking up, he noticed a roller coaster filled with silly, high pitched squealing people. Groaning mentally, he turned toward Rin, only to find her staring pityingly at him. Hugging his arm, she said,

"Poor Snowball. All this noise is getting to you, isn't it?"

Sesshomaru smiled at Rin. She knew him better than he knew himself.

"Come on, Snowball. Lets go over to that tent over their! It looks fun." And with that, he was dragged off toward a pink, heart shaped tent. When they got closer, the noticed a sign that said,

"Official Carnival Costume Contest"

"Oh no… Rin!" Sesshomaru nearly bellowed out.

"There is no way in the 7 kingdoms of cowdom that am I going in there!"

"Oh Snowball! Please!" Rin begged, lip quivering.

Sesshomaru groaned. Why did she have to look so CUTE? Why was he still WALKING? AND WHY WAS HE ABOUT TO GIVE IN?

"Snowball! I will be forever indebted to you! Please?"

That was the last straw. Sesshomaru bowed his head in defeat.

"Fine." He replied, reluctantly. What had he gotten himself into? The two entered the tent, led by a happy Rin.

Inside was a cloud of darkness. Sesshomaru strained his eyes, but it was useless, he couldn't see a single thing. He didn't like this… You never know what kind of weirdos could pop out of the dark.

"Rin Darhlin'! I haven't seen you in AGES! How are you Darhlin'?"

Sesshomaru spun around in circles, trying to find the owner of the voice, but it was impossible. He calmed as he felt Rin's hand tighten around his. Well, if Rin said it was okay…

"And who is this wonderful manly hunk you have brought to me today Darhlin'?"

Sesshomaru bristled as the speaker came into view. Him! A manly hunk! He was far more than that! He was the epoch of manliness!

"It's nice to see you again Kagura! Last time I saw you, you were on your way to Peru with a sack of bootlegged feathers," said Rin cheerfully to the horror of Sesshomaru.

Good lord! His dear sweet Rin was in cahoots with an illegal smuggler! And what's worse, this Kagura person was in the feather trade! Everyone knew that feathers were illegal in Peru because the government feared people would tickle each other to death and no one would get any work done.

What if the Peruvian officials got a hold of Rin and forced her to spend the rest of her days milking the dreaded creatures called LLAMAS?

He couldn't let that happen, but before he could say something, Kagura beat him to the punch…literally.

"Nah, those crazy hermits livin' down the street from the local Starbucks saw a downy feather sneak out of my sack and called the local pigeons to attack meh," said Kagura handing Rin a cup of punch.

As Rin raised the glass of raspberry punch to her lips, something floating on the surface of the liquid caught Sesshomaru's attention.

"RIN! STOP!"

But it was too late. His precious Rin, famous for her unique ability to down an entire gallon of liquid, had already chugged the entire cup. Before all of the juice was fully settled in her belly, she wavered in a stupor. All at once, her eyes fell shut and her legs gave out beneath her.

Sesshomaru grabbed her before she could hit the floor. Easing Rin into sitting position, he quickly felt for her pulse. Thankfully it was still beating strong. Assured that Rin wasn't dying he faced the evil feather smuggler angrily.

"WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER?" he yelled furiously.

"Stop shouting Dahlin', you'll get me in trouble with the authorities." Kagura hushed him nervously.

They had already caught her once, and she wasn't going to get caught again. This time, she could end up doing something worse than cleaning port-a-potties… like eating her veggies…

Sesshomaru couldn't care less whether this insane psycho-deranged got in trouble with the government. In fact, people like her should be locked up for the good of the entire world.

"WHAT DID YOU DO TO RIN?" he shouted again.

Kagura winced. But heck, could Rin's buddy's voice carry! If she didn't move quickly, the Peruvians would be upon her! And if the Peruvians got her… well… she didn't want to think about that.

"Rin is just sleeping Dahlin'! Now do calm down and let me explain."

Sesshomaru glared at Kagura and waited. What Kagura didn't see was one of his hands sneak into his pocket and press a button on his cell phone.

Why he had the Peruvian government officials on speed dial was something even Rin wouldn't be able to answer, but it sure came in handy every now and then. Like NOW.

"Ah, now that's a good Dahlin'. Now just follow me, and… I guess you'd better bring Rin Dahlin' with you. I would so just hate for her to miss all the fun."

Kagura grinned wickedly to herself as she held a curtain that was separating the tent open, like a tiger inviting a rabbit to enter its belly.

Sesshomaru frowned. He didn't like where this was going. Who knew was beyond the curtain? It looked innocent enough but with his superior eyesight, he could see faint patches of dark red on the fire red cloth. It looked suspiciously like dried blood.

Rin shifted in his arms, blew a few spit bubbles, and slept on, oblivious to what was going on. For Rin's sake, he'd better do what he was told, or she'd end up spending the rest of her life as an unconscious, saliva-bubble-blowing girl.

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"Inuyasha?"

"What Ball?"

Kagome's face flashed red. He was doing it again… the little, insignificant CHIPMUNK was insulting her again! She reached into her bag for her ultimate weapon, but before she could thoroughly threaten the white haired dog before her, he said again,

"What do you want?"

"I want to go to that tent over there."

Inuyasha looked up from his empty plate at the tent where the ball was pointing.

"Carnival Costume Contest? Even you can't be that deluded Ball. There is no way we're going to waste out time there!"

A dark shadow came over Kagome's face, but Inuyasha wasn't paying attention. He was looking at his hands, or rather…what wasn't in his hands.

The food…

The wonderful, precious food that the Ball had won for him… it was… GONE!

Inuyasha could feel great, fat, cow sized drops form in his eyes. How could the food be gone! It was his precious…. His lovely yummy precious… and it lived no more. WHERE DID IT DISAPPEAR TO?

His stomach chose that moment to give a very satisfied rolling gurgle.

Ah, that's right. He had eaten all of it in the first five minutes.

"Inuyasha…" said Kagome sweetly.

The white haired male sniffed mournfully.

"I have something for you."

Inuyasha opened his mouth to reply that whatever the Ball had, he didn't want it, but before he could speak, his jumpy nostrils twitched. A beautiful scent came his way and gave his whole body lovely little tingles…the tingles that only food could bring.

Closing his eyes, he inhaled deeply, like a druggie with an addicting drug. His canine sense grabbed hold of his body and he began to track the source of the smell.

Crouching down, nose to the ground, he followed it with great stubbornness. Rain, hail, and Miroku's butcher knife couldn't keep him from… DA SOURCE!

Luckily, DA SOURCE wasn't that far away. Actually, it was right next to him.

His nose bumped into a shoe that looked oddly familiar, but Inuyasha was too busy sniffing to care. He moved up, following a path made by a pair of long, slim legs. Legs? They smelled good, clean and… sorta Ball-ishy.

But he had no time to spare on idle thoughts. Inuyasha determinedly continued up until suddenly…

WHAM

WHACK

WHABOOM

"BLEEEEEEEEP BLEEEEEEEP!"

Groaning slightly, the white haired demon dog lay on the filthy ground and stared upwards. When the pretty, sparkly stars faded from his vision, the first thing he saw was the Ball's furious face. It looked like a really large pimple, fit to burst. In fact, if he wasn't thoroughly beaten all over, Inuyasha would've yanked out the needle he had stolen from his friend and poked at the Ball.

The second thing he noticed was that he had a very decent shot of the Ball's underpants. It was a pretty white color with… black spots on it. A small wildfire started in his gut, but he squashed it down with a large hammer, because his eyes finally saw the third thing.

In one hand, was an extremely large frying pan Inuyasha recognized from the tree house, but his mind had no time to wonder how she had managed to fit it in her small, hot dog sized purse, because in the other hand, the Ball was holding…a HOT DOG!

Jumping to his feet as if he hadn't just been beaten down with an inch of heavy steel, Inuyasha leapt towards his beacon of fluffy bread with a long, protein filled, slightly unhealthy tube shaped meat clamped in between.

Grinning wickedly, Kagome waved the enticing food item over Inuyasha's head.

"Now listen closely to me, my poor dear, starved puppy dog. I'm going to give you two choices. (1) You can either come with me to the Costume tent and I reward you with this delicious, HOT, JUICEY HOT DOG. Or… (2) You can stay here while I go to the Costume tent and leave you to die of lack of food."

Even though she had him tied to a stake as tightly as a pig led to the butcher, Inuyasha couldn't help but waste a few seconds staring in blatant admiration of the Ball. What a woman! What fierce rage and cunning deviousness!

"Well? Which will it be albino fruitcake?"

When Inuyasha looked at the hotdog again, Kagome had her answer. Cackling with pure evilness, she turned on her heels and began heading for the tent, knowing a certain white haired, gluttonous person would be following close behind.

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"Miroku!"

The dark, blue eyed man paused, one foot raised in mid air, like a wise stork.

"Yes Sango, my most beloved derriere?"

When the long haired girl standing a few paces behind him did not inflict any serious, painful, loving punishment, Miroku knew something… something BIG…was up.

Spinning around with what he hoped was a winning, charming, heart throbbing smile, he grabbed Sango's shoulders.

"Sango, Hello Kitty of my heart! You don't have to say it! I understand!"

Sango's eyebrow twitched. This was unusual. Miroku…understanding her for once. Normally, she had to forcefully stuff her words down his ears, then reinforce the message with several… rather painful techniques.

"You do?"

"Yes! I know what you want! I know what you want to say!"

"You do?"

"My lovely beefy cow, we are connected by fate! I can understand you better than any hobo on the street could! And the answer to your question is YES! YES WITH ALL MY HEART!"

Blinking, Sango awkwardly patted Miroku on the head like he was Kilala, her pet kitty with three tails. Sure he was a bite…large, but he was still kinda cuddly. She was really touched by how quick he had agreed to accompany her to the interesting looking tent labeled Carnival Costume Contest, and she didn't even have to ask. Sango hoped that things were going just as well with her friend Kagome and that oddball of a person named Inuyasha.

It looked like their relationship was really budding and blooming.

"Nothing would please me more to bestow upon you the honor of bearing my child!"

Or not.

5 minutes later, Sango headed for the tent with a rather bashed up Miroku following her wearing a new ostrich egg sized bump on his head with several bruises dotting random patches of skin.

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"Now, are we clear?"

The corners of Kagura's lips twitched upwards as she stared at Sesshomaru, knowing what the beefy hunk would reply.

Sesshomaru gritted his teeth. Why was he doing this? This was absolutely unlike him and way out of his character. So how had he let himself get talked into this mess?

The answer laid him his arms, now building spit bubble castles with great vigor, for a sleeping person.

"Yes."

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"Inuyasha! Stop munching so loudly! The show's about to start."

Kagome hissed at Inuyasha.

"KAGOME!"

Kagome looked at where the call had come from. Sango was waving across the rows of seats at her. A very beaten up Miroku was standing behind her, looking at Sango's bottom.

"Having fun?"

Kagome asked Sango as the friends sat down together in the front center with a perfect view of the stage.

Sango shook her head. Beating up Miroku was rather entertaining, but not eggactly fun. And if getting threatened by an insane cult eager to eat her was fun, then she was a llama.

But Miroku had kissed her…

"It was… different. What about you and demon dog boy?"

Kagome paused to reflect on her evening. She had gotten to know Inuyasha better, mainly that he was a glutton for food.

"We had fun."

Yanking out her giant stuffed cow plushie, she put it on top of her head to protect herself from assassinators. The lights dimmed and a speaker strode onto the stage and welcomed everyone to enjoy the show.

And then the fun began.

People of all ages, from infants carried in by their mothers to wizened grannies and grandpa's each took a turn on the stage, wearing a costume.

The costumes themselves varied in themes and styles. Some were made after animals and some after foods. There were slinky dresses, and outfits from different periods of history, all with a unique twist.

Kagome "ooo-ed" and "ahh-ed" at all the outfits, Inuyasha "ooo-ed" and "ahh-ed" at his hard claimed prize, the hot dog, and Miroku, he "ooo-ed" and "ahh-ed" at the females on the stage.

Finally, the show reached a climax. The speaker returned to the podium.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, Thank you for your enthusiasm tonight. For our final costume entry, I would like the present the designer, world renown, KAGURA-SAMA!"

An elegant woman dressed in a simple kimono walked onto the stage and bowed to the audience. Pulling out a fan, she fluttered it, sending the curtains flapping.

"Thank you for the honor. I am the great, the power, the most awesome KAGURA-SAMA! While I have designed several outfits of beauty, what I will present to you tonight will be my masterpiece, the cream of my creative genius!"

"This sounds interesting," Kagome whispered to Sango.

"I can't wait to see what it is," Sango agreed.

"Thank you for your inspiring words, KAGURA-SAMA!" The speaker said.

"And now… PRESENTING…THE BEAUTIFUL… THE HUNKY…THE MANLY… THE POWERFUL…THE AWE INSPIRING…THE GLORIOUS WHIPPED CREAM ON AN ICE CREAM… LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR OUR MODEL…"

"Must be a gorgeous person," Kagome said excitedly while Sango nodded eagerly.

"MR. SESSHOMARU-SAMA!"

Sesshomaru walked onto the stage amid several clicking and flashing from cameras. As he stepped onto the stage, silence descended on the crowd. He could see Rin sleeping in the front row, right where that she witch Kagura said she would put Rin.

The silence was deafening. Sesshomaru wondered if the outfit made him really look that good. Kagura had assured him it was in the latest style, and illegal smuggler that she was… she did have some credit as a designer.

The motionless quiet of the audience was suddenly broken by a loud PAAAAAAPHOOOOOOOOOOO-yish sound of Inuyasha spitting out his hotdog.

"SESSHOMARU!"

Inuyasha had finally taken his eyes off his food and looked up at the stage, only to see his older brother, who was such a cold, heartless, mean fruitcake, dressed up…in a … … Long, calf length white boots, short short navy blue skirt, sailor uniform with a large red bow and a fat pink broach in the center, long elbow length gloves, and a ribbon around his neck.

His silvery mane of pearlescent white hair was tied into two tails, each streaming out of a round ball of hair at the top of his head. In fact…Sesshomaru looked a lot like that one super hero on one of Miroku's favorite shows… What was the hero's name again?

"SAILOR MOON! MY HERO!"

Miroku's loud scream of adoration broke the spell over the audience and they began to scream, whistle and cheer with absolute undying adoration.

Sesshomaru was a bit taken back by the power of the audience. Did he look that good? He had thought the costume looked odd, almost eggactly like one of the super hero's on that show that Rin loved to watch so much.

The loud noise and rambuncous cheering woke up his sleeping angel. Rin sat up groggily, rubbing the sleep away from her eyes. The first things her soft brown orbs landed on was her lover dressed up as…

The DEFENDER OF LOVE AND JUSTICE…

HER FAVORITE SUPERHERO!

Rin couldn't help it, she burst into happy laughter.

"Sailor Sesshomaru!" she squealed, running on stage and enveloping him in a hug.

"Thank you Snowball! You know just what to do to make me happy!"

Snowball's face flushed red. Rin was the only one who could do that to him. Well… if Rin liked it, then he liked it.

"And now, a word from the designer! What inspired you to design such a beautiful outfit?"

The speaker yelled into the mic, over the roars of approval from the crowd.

Kagura stood up from where she was sitting and patted her kimono. But before her feet could bring her close to the podium, loud sirens were heard outside the tent.

"WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE, KAGURA! COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS RAISED OR WE NUKE THIS ENTIRE CARNIVAL!"

Uh-oh…

Sesshomaru had forgotten about the Peruvian officials. Now was too late, he quickly picked up Rin and made a mad dash for the exit while blaring lights flashed on the canvas covers of the tent.

Sesshomaru caught Inuyasha's and his flea bitten brother nodded. They didn't get along, but they could still understand each other.

Grabbing the Ball's hand, he dragged her, leading her after Sesshomaru and Rin. Even without looking back, he could sense Miroku was behind him. Or maybe it was because of the loud banshee like screams the Miroku produced whenever he was required to exercise.

"Shut up Miroku!"

He yelled it at the same time Sango did. Surprised, he looked at Sango. She was learning how to handle his unhandlable buddy.

The three couples made it to Sesshomaru's car without much mishap. They sped out of the parking lot just as helicopters started gathering over the tent where Sailor Sesshomaru had been just a few minutes before.

Silence settled over the occupants in the vehicle, until Rin spoke up.

"Tonight was fun."

Quickly, Kagome and Sango jumped in and agreed. The events of their night was the stuff of legends.

Sesshomaru dropped Miroku and Sango off at the tree house. Then waited for Kagome to exit. When she didn't budge, Inuyasha poked her.

"Move Ball."

"I need to go home Inuyasha."

The youth blinked his eyes, then scratched his ears. Had he heard right? Did she really want to get away from him that badly?

"I miss my family. They should be back by today."

Kagome was mumbling. To be honest with herself, she liked spending time at the tree house. It was exciting and more fun than she had ever had in a while. But at the same time, a part of her longed for her family.

Inuyasha stared at the girl sitting next to him. What was he going to do? He wanted her to stay with him, that much was true. It was outrageously hilarious riling her up, but he could see that she really did want to go home.

Quickly, before she hand time to react, he pinned her to the seat of the car and whispered quietly in her ear, "Go home, but don't forget you belong to me."

His warm breath sent shivers running down Kagome's spine.

"Don't make out in my car brat."

Inuyasha took a half hearted swing at his older brother then exited the vehicle.

Kagome was still frozen in the same spot, hugging her cow plushie tightly. She had forgotten how strong and dangerous Inuyasha could be. If he wanted, he could easily force her to come back with him…yet he let her go. Was there more to him than met the eye?

"Where to?"

Sesshomaru's short question brought her out of her thoughts and as she gave directions to her family shrine, she sat back in the leather seats, turning everything Inuyasha had ever done to her in her mind…

Saving her from when she was about to drown, being her fluffly pillow when she was cold, burping in her face, comforting her when she was afraid of the storm, yelling at his weird friend when he poked her with a needle on her pressure point, winning the cow plushie for her, saying thank you when she won him the food…

All the memories floated to the top of her mind, and a bigger question appeared. How did she feel about Inuyasha?

He annoyed the life and soul out of her, but it couldn't be denied that she cared about him. But to what extent? What did he mean to her?

Thanking Sesshomaru who gave her a curt nod, Kagome climbed the steps to her home. Walking inside, she flipped on the lights. When no Souta came charging down the stairs to greet her, or Grandpa with his charms and spells, she suddenly remembered that they were on vacation.

Sighing, she was about to head up to her room when the beeping red light on the answering machine caught her eye.

"Kagome, I forgot to tell you before we left, a friend of yours called and asked if he could stay with us for a few weeks. He's supposedly here on business and should arrive tonight. I want you to be nice to him and don't burn his toothbrush."

Kagome frowned slightly when her mom's voice clicked off. That was unusual… She didn't know of any friends who lived far away…

Glancing up at the clock that read 10 thirty, Kagome shrugged. Now was too late to worry about it. If they haven't shown up yet, maybe the person got lost… or forgot.

Climbing the stairs, Kagome headed for her room. Sighing tiredly, she flicked on her light switch and was greeted by a male standing in her room, looking at the pictures on her dresser.

At her entrance, the male turned and gave Kagome, who was frozen to the ground a smile.

"It's been a long time Kagome."

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AN: Yes, I left off with a cliffie! But this is the longest chapter in this entire story so far! XD Its to apologize for the 2 year update. I really am sorry about that. I didn't mean to give up on it…XD So for those who still read this story. I'm back and hopefully will update again before the end of the year.

And for those who are wondering, I know we've reached 400 reviews, and I'm working on getting the Inuyasha interview up, but it would be nice… to get 500 reviews too…XD (ish a greedy little llama)

DraGonMistress704 – Lolz! I claim fluffly sama! rin pops up looking murderous

Liz – Thank you! I updated… but two years later…XD

Evilchich – NOOOO! I SHALL STOP YOU! FEAR MEEEEE!

Prepare For I Am The Sugar - I'm sorry! XDI replied this time! And with LOVE! My name is neither… I'm called Cathy :D

Jersey – Thank you! The next chapter is finally up if you're still reading this.

KrypticInsanity3 – Thank you! I'm so sorry you had to wait two years for it…XD

Phalliwell – Updated at long last… I apologize…XD

I love koga! – Lolz, none taken. Thank you!

Anna – I updated! DON'T SHOOT ME!