I'm baaacckkk

i killed everything because i hated it.

Okay, not really, but i did edit it until i realized i was doing the some things over and over again. so here it is, new and improved.

"Most Psychotic Children EVER"

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! was the sound of John's alarm clock yes, even pyromaniacs have alarm clocks that woke him up every morning. At least, if that particular alarm clock lasted that long. This one had a record though; four days, thirteen hours, and twenty six minutes.

"Aw, shut up,'' said Pyro groggily, searching for his favorite lighter which he kept under his pillow. duh. "There you are Sheila." He said lovingly to his precious, after finding "her" somewhere next to his bedside table, shining in all her silver glory.

"Mon ami, shut dat damn alarm clock off s'il vous plait!" yelled Remy from his bedroom across the hall. St. John answered him with a grumble and a burning cloud that engulfed the alarm clock and the table it was sitting on, melting it into a plastic-y blob-ish mass.

"Rien, John, dat's da third one dis week! There is a thing called a snooze button you know!" said Gambit, poking his head through the door. "Magneto's gonna take away your lighter for dis one Mon ami." He said as a look of sheer terror crossed Pyro's face. "You know how much it pisses him off, and he's already pretty ticked. Da hairball managed to break all da windows on da third floor."

"How?"

"Remy don't know, but he heard da words "catnip" and "crossbow" through de bucket head's swears. You better watch it mon ami!" As if on cue, Magneto's voice came from the loudspeakers conveniently placed along the hallway.

"Pyro! My office! Now!"

"Oh, shit. E's gonna take her away from me," said Pyro, voice wobbling "mah Sheila!"

"Ease down mon ami! You can always get a new one!" Pyro momentarily forgot his Sheila's danger and took time to look as if Gambit had just insulted him, his mother, his father, and even the ::gasp:: precious lighter "her"self.

"What did you just say mate?" he had gone deadly soft. "Get a new one, a replacement?" Flames began to rise around them courtesy of the Shelia. Gambit was beginning to be seriously afraid. Not only because of the growing wall of fire behind him, but the fact that John hadn't inhaled in the last five minutes and was beginning to turn purple.

"Easy John, I was just kidding." Said Gambit, very much concerned. "Now go see what our bucket-headed leader wants, and please inhale for Gods sake! You look like a Smurf!"

ChapterLineDance8

Very slowly, John crept over to Magneto's office door. "Pyro," said Magneto, "that's the third one this week! Not to mention the chairs table, refrigerator, and TV!" Pyro just grumbled something about "Steve Irwen" and "Overgrown hair ball"

"Never mind! John, you are going to stop doing this! NOW! Or I shall have to take your lighter away and make you fight without it!" With that, all the blood drained from Pyro's face.

"Not mah Shelia!" he squeaked.

"Well, then you have to stop burning everything! I swear, between you lighting everything aflame and that stupid ball of fur, I think I'll lose it for good!"

"Sir yes sir!" said Pyro, not really aware of anything now that his "Shelia" was safe from harm. Because of this, Pyro didn't notice the door to Magneto's office was still closed. BANG! He now had another lump on his head to add to his collection. "Damn door." said Pyro with his all-so-shexy aussie accent. "I'll teach you to mess with me!!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" and so Pyro made Magneto seriously think about looking into another asylum by ruthlessly disciplining said offending wooden object.wood? why wood? "Let this be a lesson to all doors that dare stand in myway! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!" yelled Pyro, dancing about the smoldering piece of wood. Why it was wood, Pyro couldn't figure out, as he took a few minutes from his "hee hee hee fire fire fire" dance to ponder this. Obviously, if the door was made of metal, Magneto could slam it without getting up off his arse, and what super evil bad guy dude wants to get up to slam his own door? I wouldn't. Oh well. After he thought the door had been thoroughly punished, Pyro frolicked down the hallway as only he could do, lighting things aflame as he went, including some random boxes, a chair, and Sabertooth, who ran away screaming like the sissy little girl he is.