Title: Timing (1/?)
Name: Joy
Email: [email protected]
Spoiler: After "Blah Blah…Woof Woof"
Setting: Logan's apartment
Disclaimer: No rights to any of the characters in this story.
"Hey there, just dropped by to see if you would feed me," Max quips as Logan rolls into the kitchen.
"Fancy that. I was about to call you to see if you wanted dinner," Logan replied. They smiled at each other for a while, until they both realized they were staring. Logan broke away saying, "I hope you are in the mood for Chicken Cacciatore."
"Oh the benefits of knowing someone with money and connections," said Max and then wished she hadn't. She contemplated the idea that Logan may think that she only liked being around him for his money and good favor. Max bit her lower lip in dismay. Logan immediately noticed the involuntary action. To Logan, that little reflex was such a turn on that he wheeled around, so he did not have to see it. Being in her presence these days was hard enough without her biting her lip, those voluptuous lips.
Things had been different since Max left with Zach to escape Lydecker's military state. Logan had driven her away to be safe, but before he left she kissed him. She kissed him. He suspected it was due to the fear factor. She wouldn't have done if she weren't in danger, he had convinced himself. She did care about him he knew; she had risked her life for him on a few different occasions. He was worried that her feelings were more based on the situations rather then genuine emotions.
Max knew that things had changed since her trip to the cabin, too. The tough, genetically enhanced killing machine that she supposedly was could not be without this overgrown boy-scoot with the bankroll to back it up. Max was willing to defy Zach and face Lydecker's forces in order to be there for Logan, as his prior injuries were complicated. Max would have loved to be with Logan at first, but things were so complicated now. She needed to be more willing to walk away from Seattle or someone could get hurt, Max kept telling herself via Zach. The feelings she had needed to stay hidden. Ironically, Logan felt the same way.
"Being well connected is great for some things." Logan wheeled himself over to the counter. He picked up a large bottle of pills and tossed them to Max. "Just in. The meds to stop the shakes. That should last you a while."
"Thanks Logan," Max began softened from her normal speech. "I- I hope you don't think, I am only interested … I mean enjoy being with … What I mean is," Max struggled through the sentence, as nothing sounded right. "I am glad I came through your window that night we first met; and not just because I got a statue I could fence."
Logan waved his hand to indicate her to stop. "I enjoy your company too, Max. No worries, I understood your feeble attempt at the English language." Logan added the last statement to bring their conversation back to the level of sarcasm they normally volleyed with. He felt the need to keep things light. Just a few more interactions and he could put away these foolish feelings and things would go back to normal.
Just then, the lights flickered and went out, a brown out. The darkness suited both of their moods. Max & Logan had chemistry from the moment they met, but after Logan's accident, their relationship became more of employer/ employee thing. At this moment, they both wanted things to be different. 'Arggh,' Logan growled inside. //Just what I need, a romantic evening. // "I guess, you should stay until the brown out is over," he said aloud. Normally, Logan jumped at an opportunity for Max to stay over, but Max could sense that it was a strained invitation. She bit her lip again. //What she trying to do, kill me? //
"Let's have dinner and see if the power comes back on," Max offered. "What can I do to help?"
"Could you get a couple plates from that cabinet?"
Max got two plates down and was going to set them down on the island, when Logan ran over her toes with his wheel. This startled Max enough that the plates fell and hit the floor shattering. "Our timing is sort of off tonight, isn't it?" Max said, as she dropped to her knees to clean up the broken glass.
Logan gritted his teeth in frustration, saying, "I guess so." //Our timing sucks! //
Max cut her finger cleaning. A few drops of blood hit the floor as she winced a little. Logan had to suppress every impulse in him to mend the cut. He knew that if he did he would be unable to resist kissing her soft supple lips, staring into those gorgeous brown eyes, and losing himself in her completely. Logan said, "There are band aids in the bathroom."
As Max went to get the bandage, she realized how badly she wanted some contact between her and Logan. He felt so distant. It was almost more then she could take. She thought about leaving then thought better of it due to the brown out. With the finger bandaged, she returned to the dining room. Logan had gotten other plates, lit some candles on the table, and brought the food to the table. "Dinner is served." It was beyond romantic and hard for each to eat. Concentration was every where but on the food.
The meal was very quiet and very uncomfortable for both of them. Their emotions were brewing just under the surface. They made small talk and ate, smiling at each other a little to long for "just friends." They weren't just friends and they both knew it. //How long can this go on? //
Max took a big bite of food, so the meal would be over faster. Logan smiled, "You are wearing your dinner." He pointed to her cheek, which she had managed to get sauce on. Max was relieved, since Logan seemed a little less strained. Max attempted to wipe it off, but to no avail. "Let me," Logan said on impulse. Max offered her cheek. Logan hadn't thought about how close he would have to be to her, or how it might feel to touch her skin. He gently wiped her cheek and then just kept touching her face. All he could think was how beautiful she was and how vulnerable she was allowing herself to be with him. He began to lose himself in her eyes.
All of Max's senses were heightened. They were sitting at the table, just staring into each other's eyes. Electricity seemed to be running through Max's body. She could feel every inch of her skin. She knew her heart rate and breathing had increased. She knew he was having the same reaction. Max was clouded in thoughts and emotions. //I can't do this. I can't trust him. I am what I am. I can't be with anyone. Remember Darren! // Her mind began to down settle //…Logan is different. Logan is…// She moved closer to him slowly, unaware she was moving.
Logan tried to talk himself out of what he was feeling, but with no chance of success. //She is almost ten years younger than you are. You are keeping her here, & that could put her in danger. She could be just like Val. Maybe she really just likes the money and influence…She is nothing like Val. She is up front and honest…// And so the war of words went on in his head.
The inches between Logan and Max became centimeters, as they each drew into the other. She could hear his heart pound. The sound was hypnotic. She closed her eyes. This simple act of surrender by Max moved him in the deepest part of his being. He could no longer deny the feeling of intoxication he felt from being that close to her. Logan took a deep breath and leaned ever so slightly into Max's waiting lips.
Logan felt his body react to her touch in ways he did not expect. The sensations he felt reached clear down his toes, he swore. She responded to his lips on hers by leaning in closer. They were in a long embrace, wanting that moment never to end. Logan and Max settled into each other's arms for a few minutes. She pulled away a little and put her head on his shoulder. He stroked her long brown hair and kissed her forehead, as she lay her head down.
Logan took several deep breaths, clearing his mind of all doubt, still alive from her affection. 'This is complicated, very complicated' Max thought. 'What am I going to do?' She took her head away from his chest only to be met by his penetrating blue eyes. She needed to get out of there fast. He recognized the caged animal look on her face. She was going to bolt. He had to reach her some where inside before she left. He knew she might actually be the thing that would make her leave Seattle.
"I gotta blaze. I am supposed to meet Original Cindy. I'm sorry I totally zoned on it," Max said as she as she moved away from the embrace. // Total detachment. I will just walk out and he won't want to see me any more. // She started for the door not looking back.
"Please don't run away," Logan said softly. Max paused and looked into his pleading eyes. "Almost from the beginning, you felt safe with me. I was a place you would come to feel secure and cared for. You let me care for you during your seizures. Please don't leave, not now, not like this," he said, as wheeling after her. His face expressed so much more emotion then she wanted to see. He was right, she had depended on him, trusted him, … cared for him. Her heart began to ache.
Logan could tell he had struck a cord in her. "If you don't want to talk about an 'us' or the kiss we just shared, that's fine. If you want to leave, I won't stop you. Please, just tell me this won't be the last time I see you." Her mind spun. Max wanted to settle into his arms and also wanted to run out the door. She had no idea what to do, so she just stood there dumbly, as Logan rode over to her. She felt entirely defenseless with him. He seemed to reach the part of her that was completely human. "I know you are scared, because I am too…I am scared I will let you down. I am scared I will be unable to meet your needs. I am scared of giving my heart to someone new…My last relationship was with Valerie," Logan said as Max turned to him quickly. He was not sure if the reaction was from the accusation she was scared, or that he had not been in a relationship since his divorce. There was a long pause where neither said anything. Logan felt sure he had reached her, at least in part. "I'll be here when you get back," he said softly as he held her hand.
Max slipped her hand out of Logan's grip. He cast his eyes down, believing himself unable to watch her leave. His moment of pain was met with a moment of total bliss, as she touched his chin to tilt it upward to kiss his lips softly. Once again, his body felt the tingling in his whole being as she kissed his lips. "You know when you kiss me I feel it in my toes," Logan said with a smile.