Disclaimer: I don't own either Ranma½ or Sailormoon or Noir or Vandread or Ah! My Goddess...I wish I did so I can skip this part
Aftermath: By Lord Strife
AN: By golly, I never thought the last update was…err, years ago? Time flies when you read other peoples fics it seems. Oh well…
--- A month after the last chapter ---
"Welcome honorable customers to cursed springs, Jusenkyou! Many a spring about each have very tragic story." The fat guide warmly stated which his current customers (a girl and a man) found a little unnerving. After all, who welcomes people warmly to a cursed land? Isn't it supposed to be full of warnings?
"Are you sure this will help me?" The man asked his companion.
The young girl nodded. It had cost quite a lot. Well, to be truthful, she took it from her father's credit card. That girl with brown hair, page-cut hairstyle stated that this might provide a cure for her beloved. "Yes, we just need to find the right spring." She then turned to the guide. "So, kind sir, do you know of the spring of drown young man?"
The guide nodded, "Ah yes, I know of spring. It was just a while ago I shipped a barrel of it for customers in Japan." Both his customers blinked at this. Oh well, it was a sign of good fortune. The guide gestured for them to follow. "Please, this way, honorable customers."
The guide's guests made sure to be extra careful. They have heard from the girl who gave them this information that one misstep and you could end up with worse curse than intended.
Usagi was smiling brightly. 'Yes, everything will be okay again. With Mamoru having a curse of young man, he can recovered his lost...err, family jewels. Better yet, by changing forms, they could hide that fact that he was cured from her father. 'Yes, nothing can go wrong now.'
---
As you might think, yes when people think that infamous line, it will go wrong. Especially when the kami themselves plus a time meddling, green-haired senshi are plotting against you.
"Ready to throw the monkey wrench Set-chan?" Urd asked.
Setsuna nodded, an almost evil smile adorning her face. "Ready and waiting." After all, the future was at stake.
It was lucky that Chibi-Usa turned out the way she is. She got the 'best' possible genes from her parents. And according to the Gates of Time, if Chibi-Usa had any other sibling, they would gain the worst possible genes from a certain parent. She shivered at the thought, 'Who would have thought Mamoru had Happosai's genes in him? Think of what would happen when perverted lust plus Silver lineage would do to the world? No underwear, female…or male (as a possible future son turns out that way), would be safe!
"Now then…"
---
"So which one is it?" Mamoru asked. He couldn't help but feel…dread creeping up and down his spine.
The guide pointed to the spring just a few feet from where he was standing. "That one spring you seek.. Nannichuan, spring of drown man, there very tragic story of…." Before the guide could finish, Usagi happily grabbed Mamoru and began to move towards the said spring.
Well, as stated above, the powers that be, decided not to let the happy young couple have their happy ending…yet. It was quite simple really, Usagi was a klutz. All they need to do was…
"WAHH!" Usagi tripped on her shoelaces, and inavertedly pushed Mamoru, who then lost balance and fell…into a different spring.
"GAHHH!" Splash!
The guide nodded solemnly, "Ah, too bad! Customer fell into Mamorunichuan, there not-so tragic story of young man who lost umm, family jewels from enrage father of impregnated young girl before drowning 12000 year ago. Now who ever fall in spring take body of young man with less equipment."
Usagi stared. "NOOOOOO!" 'Not yet, there's still hope!' She hurriedly got up, grabbed Mamoru as he emerged from the spring by lapels of his shirt and tossed him into the 'Nannichuan.'
"USAGI!!!" Splash!
Guide shook his head, "Err, why girl customer do that?" The girl looked at him as if asking 'Duh.' Again he shook his head, "That not Nannichuan." Usagi cringed. "The spring next to it is Nannichuan." He placed his pipe in his mouth before continuing, "That is Chibanichuan, spring of drown loser. There very not-so tragic story of poor excuse of man who drown in spring…thinking it was Nannichuan."
"WAHHHHHHHH!!!! HOW CAN THE KAMI BE SO CRUEL TO ME?"
---
Hotaru was staring at Chibi-Usa as if she had grown another head. "Your father fell into what spring?" That was just…creepy.
Chibi-Usa looked back to her friend, "Err, which spring you were asking about? You know I mentioned at least 15 different springs."
Hotaru sweat-dropped. 'At least 15?' She got hung up at the word, 'At least.' "The one after the spring of geeky-nerd who never got 'it' before tragically drowning."
Chibi-Usa scratches her chin, "Oh you mean Kamennichuan? The spring of man drowned by irate father, and who ever falls into spring will get curse of never getting blessing of a father of a young girl in any form of relationship?"
Hotaru again sweat-dropped, "Err no…." 'Actually she hasn't told me that one yet.' "I was asking about the one with fruit flies."
"Oh! You mean that one? Well…"
---
Dr. Ryoume Mizuno nodded in a good way as she checked the progress of her child's pregnancy as well as her niece's. "Hard to imagine you two are already two months into your pregnancy now." She put aside her medical tools as she finish up with her check-up.
"So do we, auntie. I think in about a few weeks we will be beginning to show." Akane stated as she rubs her belly. "According to Dr. Tofu, based on my Ki, he noted that I was carrying twins."
Ryoume raised an eyebrow at that. It was two weeks ago when they local chiropractor visited to see how Akane and her cousin were doing. "Interesting." She glanced at Ami.
Ami noted the look, "He said I'm having only one child Mom."
"I see. I guess I'll take that as fact then." Although she mentally noted she will need to double check that later when the babies are big enough to be ultra-sounded. Perhaps she could convince the doctor to help around Juban Hospital. "So…how's your fiancé doing?"
"Uncle Frank got him to go out drinking with him again." Akane answered.
Ryoume blinked. Apparently Ranma has yet to learn the consequences of drinking. "And…pray tell, where are Meia and Kirika?"
All she got was a Cheshire grin from Akane and Ami.
"Oh, my!"
It really must run in the family.
---
Beijing international airport was a sight of chaos. Several security personnel as well police SWAT were all at the scene. "Kami above…what IS that monstrosity?" One officer asked as he trailed his gun at the aforementioned target that was causing a mass hysteria among the people in the airport. "It must be a new bio-terror weapon!"
"Who cares, we deal with it the same way we deal with all freaks of nature!" His fellow officer replied.
"We run and hide in a bomb shelter?"
"No you idiot! We shoot it where it hurts the most!"
"Oh…"
And that was when the order to fire-at-will was given. Bang! Bang! Bang!
"MAMORU! NO!!!!"
And the multi-cursed individual fell on the cold, cold airport floor…clutching his, err, what will pass for a family jewel.
"Ha! Take that you freak!" The SWAT officers cheered. Now the world was safe place once again.
---
Urd chuckled, "Yup, the world is safe again. In more ways than one."
Setsuna nodded, "Agreed. But I do declare…" Urd to turn to her friend, noting she was holding an empty bottle. "We need more champagne."
"Right, right. Can't toast properly without proper liquids."
---
"And in today's news, a freak of nature was gunned down at Beijing Airport…" Click. "And on sports weekly, baseball…."
Ukyou sighed, "Much better."
Shampoo couldn't agree more. That poor sap was obviously a Jusenkyou cursed individual. But she couldn't figure out what spring it was. It seems that there was a far worse spring than the one Taro got cursed with.
If they only knew.