A/N: Using chess as a metaphore is not original (i.e. the muscial "Chess" by Tim Rice & Bjorn Andersen). But it's fun, nonetheless.
I. Chess: Knives vs. Vash
Black and white. Perfectly square, orderly, neat. Clear, established rules.
The chessboard.
His world.
A child's world.
He still sees everything in absolutes.
Right or wrong. Win or Lose.
Unfortunately, life is gray, irregular shapes with fuzzy edges.
Right, wrong, or both? Win, lose, draw, truce, forfeit, or Pyrrhic victory?
And the rules constantly shift and change. They're not rigid and inflexible...
"VASH!"
... Like the stick up his ass! ..
... if he got drunk...
...or laid...
...or.. both!...
...maybe...
"What the hell are you grinning about, idiot? Make your move already!"
Oh, yeah. Completely, utterly, shit-faced drunk.
"Checkmate."
II. Chess: Knives vs. Millie
"Math is objective and unbiased," Knives said.
"So... it doesn't matter what people think of you, if your answer's right, you're right?" Millie frowned as she moved her bishop.
"Yes. The beauty of mathematics is that there's only one correct answer."
"I thought... sometimes, in higher math, there can be more than one solution."
Knives stared. "You know calculus?"
Millie blinked. "Huh?"
Knives sighed. He was reading too much into her ramblings.
Except... she was right. Some problems did have more than one solution. Granted, some solutions were more difficult than others, but...
Millie giggled. "I forgot! Check!"
He grudgingly moved his king back.
III. Chess: Knives vs. Meryl
"You arrogant, egotistical, self-centered, pompous ass!" Meryl screamed.
Knives grinned. "But we ARE superior to humans."
"Screw your superiority," Meryl snarled. "Next you'll tell me your farts don't stink."
"Actually, our intestinal microbial biota differs significantly from humans. We lack the methanogenic archeabacteria that-."
"What the hell are you saying?" Meryl growled.
"My farts, as you so crudely refer to them, do not stink," Knives said archly.
CRASH!
Downstairs, Vash winced. "They've never even STARTED a game," he sighed.
Millie patted Vash's shoulder sympathetically. "Yes, but this time, they went a whole 10 minutes before overturning the chessboard."A?N:
A/N: This one is a bit AU, if you assume chess on Gunsmoke is the same as chess on Earth. It's influenced by the fanfic "Dark Sun," by Callay. The author explores some interesting issues- how has human culture changed since getting marooned on Gunsmoke? Nighttow clearly implies changes have happened- "iles", not "miles", "double dollars", etc. What else has changed?
IV. Chess: Knives vs. Millie II
"You can't move the knight there." Knives growled.
"It's a Thomas, not night, and why can't I move it there?" Millie asked.
"It's supposed to be an armored warrior on a horse." Knives explained.
"So why is it shaped like a Thomas?" Millie was truly puzzled.
"I don't know," Knives grumbled. "Chess survived a thousand years, intact, on Earth. yet you have managed to corrupt it almost beyond recognition within a mere 150 years."
"Chess is one of the few inventions of humanity that is worth saving."
"Like Plants," Millie agreed, distracted by the chessboard.
V. Chess: Knives vs.
"I know what you're thinking."
Knives stared into the eyes of his current opponent. The large, unblinking green eyes merely regarded him innocently.
"That last move was unexpected," he admitted. "But if you're going for unpredictability, your strategy is painfully transparent."
Knives knew he would get no response, so he moved his queen across the board.
"Check," he smirked.
A black rook flew across the board, knocking his white King over.
Knives blinked. He lost...? True, he had underestimated Vash & the larger female spider. But it was impossible to underestimate this opponent!
"How..." He stared across the board.
"Nyao."