Okay, although it seems it's Mary-Sue season in the Cats fandom, I've decided to continue with this story. A couple of months ago I stopped updating because I realized I had a Mary-Sue in my hands, and I wanted to change a couple of things. After thinking of it for a while, I realized that the only thing a could do to de-suefy my OC was transforming her into an ugly middle-aged tom with no relation at all with any canon character... but that would be terribly unfunny.
I have thought several times of abandoning this fic, since the Sue-bashers are more active than ever, and writing a female original character has become OMGTHEEBOL! But, with nine chapters so far, the harm is already done, and my (more or less) half a dozen faithful readers deserve to know what happens in the end.
Yes, I am a Suethor, I'm perfectly aware of it. But I don't take my original character too seriously... in fact, I've realized she tends to be more insane, and to have worse luck, as chapters go by. And it's fun to write, and (I hope) to read. So... Pandora the nutcase is back for good. Enjoy it. I'll be under my bed, hiding from the flames.
RAY OF GOLD 9 - OPENING THE THUNDERS BOX
Mungojerrie ducked swiftly to avoid a flying jar that seemed to have been propelled towards him. The jar missed the target for a couple of inches and crashed against a pile of junk behind the tom.
"I still haven't given you any reason for killing me, luv!" he smirked.
A few steps away, Pandora was venting her anger by kicking several objects down the junkpile. A toaster, a couple of plates and a porcelain piggy bank went the same way before the queen sat down, fuming.
"He says my plan is foolish!" she complained. "Haven't you heard him? That authoritarian, ridiculous, repressed, unreasonable..."
"I got it already", interrupted the calico tom. "But, listen..."
"...that lame caricature of a leader dares to say my plan is foolish!" She stood up again and began pacing up and down, shooting resentful looks to the area of the junkyard where Munkustrap and the rest of the toms were still discussing what to do.
Mungojerrie walked towards her and slung an arm around her shoulders. "You shouldn't talk about your father like that. Now you're angry, but deep down you must admit he's right. I mean... letting you go by yourself to rescue the kitten is a plan without any security of success."
"Oh, so now you're against me too?" she said pushing him away. "All right then, I'm going alone!"
"Three cheers for stubborn queens! I'm not against you, nor is the rest of the world, luv..." he grinned bitterly as he held her paw to retain her. "All right then, I'm going with you."
"No, you're not. This is my war, tiger, not yours."
The calico tom's face became serious. "I won't allow you to walk into such a danger alone", he said in a concerned voice.
Her eyes flashed. "You won't allow me? Who... who do you think you are to tell me what to do?"
"Well, as we're almost..."
"Almost?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Mates."
"What?" the queen's expression changed from surprise to anger in a second. Her paws clenched and unclenched several times before she was able to speak again... at the top of her voice. "So we... we sleep together a few times and you already think you own me? I don't need a mate! I don't want a mate until I say so, and now it's not the moment!" she exploded.
"Why are you so angry? I just want..."
"To have me at your disposal whenever you fancy!" she shouted, slapping his paw away. "But you have no rights over me. Perhaps you'd better search for another queen willing to be your devoted and obedient mate!"
"All right, maybe I should do it!" The calico tom started to walk away, but suddenly he turned back to face her again: "No! Devil of a queen... I should curse the day I met you... but I love you, damn it!"
She looked at him, bewildered, and took a backward step. "You... what?"
"I said 'love', Pandora. You may not like the word, but don't react as if it was an insult."
"But I'm not meant for... I mean... what?" She looked at him dumbly.
"Not long ago you asked me if I trusted you. Are you so scared to trust me in return? You're not your mother and I'm not Munkustrap. History doesn't repeat itself, not in that way. You know I'm not flawless... I'm not the best choice you could make, but I believe you're with me for some reason."
"I thought you were just passing the time with me; that's the way toms are, they all do the same", she said stubbornly, still scowling.
At this point Mungojerrie run out of patience. He forced her into his arms and made her look him in the eye. "I'm not a pastime, and neither are you! Tell me you love me and I'll die for you if you need it; say you don't, and you won't see me again if that's your will. But stop playing with me... stop being a selfish brat and show that you have a heart, for one time!"
Her lower lip began to tremble. "You're asking me to do something I've never done before," she mewed in a barely audible whisper.
"I didn't think you were a coward", he growled.
"I..." her voice broke, and a tear ran soundlessly down her face. Mungojerrie realized that the queen's gaze was lost somewhere behind his shoulder, and that her anger had melted into an almost catatonic state. She didn't even seem to be breathing. He released her from his embrace, feeling his heart contract; the queen bit down on her lip, hard, and he couldn't take it anymore.
"Don't cry, please, luv... I can't stand it", he said as he licked the tears from her cheeks. "I didn't want... I don't want to force you to do anything. Please, stop crying, luv."
She reacted at last and leaned her head on his shoulder, sobbing. "Don't pressure me, Jerrie. There've been many changes in a few days, and I wasn't ready for this... ready for you."
"It's all right, luv. Forget about it. I just need to have you beside me; you don't have to say anything", he muttered, grooming the fur of his unbalanced queenfriend.
Pandora looked up at him, to his hazel eyes full of tenderness. Those eyes beginning to well tears. Her own words echoed in her mind: 'If a tom happens to fall for me, I can't stop that, but I won't allow myself to return the favour...' But the lies she could tell herself had reached their limit. 'Heaviside, what have I done to him?', she thought. He was right in front of her... sad, confused, hurt. Loving her in spite of how she treated him...
She swallowed hard and gathered all her strength: "Maybe I'm not the kind of queen you expected. I'm trying to be honest... I do feel something, but my feelings are scaring me. I'd love to say that I'll be your mate, have your kittens and all that stuff...but maybe it's the worst thing I could do, make promises that I don't know if I'll be able to keep."
The tom closed his eyes and remained in silence. "Jerrie?" she whispered. "Tiger?"
"I never wanted you to say anything you don't really feel, luv", he said in a sad voice.
She nuzzled his neck softly, with a shy smile. "Tiger, I was wondering..."
"Yes?"
"The Jellicle Ball... it will be soon, right?"
"Within two weeks."
"I was wondering if you would go to the Ball with me..." she caressed his cheek and stood on her tiptoes to whisper in his ear, "...and ask that question again? When all this madness is over, when my brothers are avenged... I'll give you the answer you want."
He gave her a hard look, still serious: "With one condition."
Pandora frowned at the unexpected answer, somewhat puzzled. "What?"
"If the answer is yes, don't expect me to ask Munkustrap for your paw... unless you want a very dead mate", he said with a trademark notorious grin.
"At this stage, I don't think that will be necessary", she laughed. "So, will you dance with me at the Ball?"
"I've never seen you dance."
"Well, I'm not very much of a dancer... I hope nobody laughs at me."
"Nobody will... They all know that if somebody laughs at you, you'll probably skin him alive."
"Hey, I'm not that bad!" she punched the tom in the arm, joking. "Well, will you go with me or not?"
"Of course I will! Though, there's one more little thing... I can stand your mood changes so far, but I'm beginning to grow tired of you giving me orders all the time, luv. Sometimes I feel like a toy-tom."
"Wouldn't you endure one last order?" she pouted.
"Which one?"
"Hush your mouth and kiss me."
"Devil of a queen! How on Heaviside did I allow this all to begin?" he sighed.
"Because of something... like this?" Pandora giggled, licking his nose with a soft purr.
"I'll have to give way again," he said with a naughty smile as he leaned down to her, "...for the last time."
"The last time! I'm not worrying about that queen and her crazy ideas any more!", said a frustrated Munkustrap, more to himself than to anyone else, as he took his guarding position on top of the tyre. His ears were still ringing from the string of profanities Pandora had launched at him a while before, and, after trying unsuccessfully to stop her, he had run out of ideas.
It was noon of a cold spring day, and the clearing was deserted. After the argument, the rest of the Jellicles had resumed their regular occupations, and the rescue mission had been temporarily postponed. The only point of agreement they could clear after the dispute had been the ruling out of an open attack, so Alonzo, Plato and Kant were sent as scouts to look for a weak point on Macavity's defences.
Suddenly the Jellicle protector saw his own weak point: a faint sound behind the old washing machine preceded the appearance of a golden calico queen, who walked towards him in silence. He wanted so badly to embrace her... that he had to cross his arms instead, and his gaze lowered to his ex-mate in front of him.
"What do you want?" 'Great movement, he thought. The first words you address to the queen of your life in a year and a half, and you can't think of something better?'
"I've heard about the kidnapping of Jemima's baby kitten. I just wanted to know if there's any news..."
"I refuse to believe that you walked all the way here just to make that question." 'Go on, genius. Scare her again. In a moment she'll disappear and leave this junkyard forever... What's a tom supposed to say in this situation?'
Demeter didn't seem to mind his harsh remark. "Well, Jemima must be worried about her kitten... And I'm worried about mine. Is my daughter here?"
"Our daughter, Demeter. No, she's already gone... she argued with me in front of the whole tribe, then shouted to her tomfriend for a while, and finally left towards Macavity's lair, despite everybody's advice!" The silver tabby let go an irritated sigh. "How could you raise her like that? She's a savage! She thinks she's entitled to appear in the junkyard every time she pleases, terrorizing the youngsters, undermining my authority and hanging around with that burglar... If it weren't to break Rumpleteazer's heart, I'd already have kicked that bastard out of here", he growled.
"It seems I'm the only one who thinks that having a relationship is good for her", said the golden queen. "Besides, you weren't so concerned about my sister being heartbroken when you expelled me from here."
"That was different."
"It was different because it was you." Demeter smiled bitterly, her gaze fixed on the ground. "Your pride, your position, your... honour? Yes, the things that mattered more than me, more than the truth."
"Nothing mattered more than you, Deme. A long time ago I made a mistake. I believed in a lie, and..."
"And then you mated another queen three months later."
Munkustrap tried to answer, but the queen stopped him with a gesture of her paw. "Anyway, our past is not the point now. I need to see my daughter before she does something dangerous."
"She's gone. To Macavity's lair, in the docks. She wouldn't accept anybody's help."
Demeter shivered.
"Really, you should have talked to her seriously before she started doing such stupid things", said the tabby, somewhat resentfully. "I can understand a bit of youthful rebelliousness, but acting out like she's a crazy avenger is leading her too far. Your daughter will end up being killed if she behaves like that."
"Oh, now she's only my daughter, again?" The golden calico's voice was beginning to sound hysterical. "Acting out, you said? If she were acting out I could have stopped her before. You don't understand... Something broke in her mind when she saw her brothers being killed. She's not pretending to be insane, Munkustrap."
"What do you mean? That she's... crazy?"
"Sociopath would be the exact term."
"But how?"
Demeter sat down on top of a cardboard box, keeping her gaze down to the floor, and took a deep breath, like preparing to give a well-meditated speech. "The trauma from the murder of... of our kittens caused it. Pandora has a fairly normal temperament most of the time, but sometimes she's too much to handle for me, like a feral kitten grown up who takes pride in bending and breaking the rules. When she came up with the idea of avenging her brothers, she used to run away from home and challenge random street cats to fight, just for the sake of training. She only cares about fulfilling her revenge, but she's too impulsive to plan ahead and can't see the danger of her behaviour. And because of the kind of life she's had, growing without a father... she has a very aggressive attitude towards toms, and until now she hasn't shown any interest in bonding with a mate. That's why I think Mungojerrie can bring her some balance. None of her previous tomfriends has been able to..."
"Previous tomfriends? I don't want to hear more", the silver tabby spat, beginning to pace nervously up and down the clearing.
Demeter stood up and ran to him, detaining him with a paw on his forearm. "Listen to me, Munkustrap. If only for this time, listen! When Pandora was a kitten I could keep her far from danger, but now she won't pay attention to anybody, even me. She's a Machiavellian manipulator, with a complete disregard for the rules and a fixation on revenge." The calico queen looked up at her former mate. "It breaks my heart to speak of my daughter in this way... but she's out of control, and I don't want to lose the last of my kittens", she said in a broken voice.
"But, if she has a mental problem, there's nothing we can do!" The tom put a comforting hand on Demeter's shoulder, but she stiffened, as if touched by an electric shock. "Stay in the junkyard for the night if you feel safer here; maybe Pandora won't be able to find Macavity and will give it all up."
"How kind of you to let me stay", said the queen, moving away from him. "I guess I'm not a shame to the tribe any more, am I?"
The Jellicle protector didn't answer, but his sad gaze fixed on her was answer enough.
"You say there's nothing we can do, Munkustrap. Fortunately, living in the streets has taught me to consider all the options", said the golden queen as she stepped back from him, smiling sadly.
"What are you going to do?"
"If an enemy can't be defeated, maybe it can be bribed", she whispered. "There's always something to make a deal with." Then she walked away and disappeared from sight.
The queen followed carefully Mungojerrie's directions - not wanting him to go with her didn't mean she wouldn't appreciate a little help. She made her way through the docks, avoiding the noisy humans who populated the place: sailors, fishmongers, drunk beggars, prostitutes. Finally she walked past the fish market, to find an old warehouse that was in desperate need of a coat of paint.
It took her just a minute to climb to the roof of hte warehouse and enter the bare room below. It was dark and empty, with a few wooden pallets and a big samwill machine rusting in a corner. She had planned to make her way down to the first floor, where Macavity's center of operations supposedly was. Outside the room, a labyrinth of corridors and passageways; many of them looked alike, and more than one led to a blind alley. Finally, the queen arrived to a narrow staircase, and she stopped in her tracks when she heard a creaking noise behind a closed door. Before she could react, the door opened suddenly, and she felt a shadow falling over her.
Pandora reacted just in time: her enemy was a skilled fighter who had aimed for her throat, looking for a quick death. She dodged his attack with a quick spin of her body, but one of the henchcat's claws found its target, and now her arm was bleeding. The sight of blood unleashed all her fury and she brought up her right leg to deliver a power kick to his side and another punch to his face. But her opponent was far from defeated – he rose from the floor for another attack, and she could now see him clearly: yellow eyes, skinny features, short brown fur. Merrick's kidnapper.
"I'm glad you are fighting someone of your size at last, scum", she spat between her teeth.
"The name is Reg, if you please, brat", he grinned. "Yes, it's always a pleasure to help Macavity get rid of a little nuisance like you. When you lay dead at his feet, I'll be his right paw. And when I'm his right paw, I'll have almost half of his empire under my control… it's quite a reward for killing a hysteric queen."
"Do you always talk thatmuch, asshole? You're going to kill me with a headache."
"What would your older brothers say if they heard that language? Oh, wait… they wouldn't say anything because they're dead. Maybe I'll do you a favour and send you to meet them at las…" he couldn't finish the sentence. The queen charged at him with a blind rage, clawing and scratching, baring her fangs in a furious growl. Lost in his own speech, the henchcat was caught off-guard and fell to the floor, with a bad wound on his shoulder. Pandora retreated, took a run-up, and attacked again. She held the henchcat by his neck with all her strenght, lifting him a few inches from the floor. A few blood drops run down Reg's neck, and down the queen's arm as she tightened the grip. The tom wasn't talking anymore, but he made a strange choking sound, averting his gaze to the open door behind them.
Expecting another enemy at her back, Pandora launched the badly wounded henchcat against the wall and quickly turned over…and froze, like struck by a lightning.
Brown fur, big yellow eyes. The kitten was staring at her with a terrorized look, not daring to move, and then all went dark in her mind...
...a female kitten, scared to death, in front of an enemy ready to attack, to kill. She is too scared to close her eyes, too paralized to run. And there is blood… spilled everywhere, on the floor, the walls, even a few drops on the kitten's golden fur. She hears a piercing cry. Mother. Out of the corner of her eye she sees Mother, going by two little motionless bodies on the floor and running to her. It feels like Mother will never reach her. Feels like Mother's moving under water. The kitten opens her mouth to scream, but no sound can be heard…
Pandora leaned on the wall, her gaze locked at Reg's kitten. She recognized the expression, the terror that matched her own. This kitten would remember. He would hunt her some day in the future. He would grow up as crippled inside as her...
The tabby queen looked back at her fallen enemy and frowned. The henchcat was badly hurt, he wouldn't wake up in a long time. Harmless as he was, the danger was minimal... and Pandora knew she would be unable to kill Reg in front of his son. Letting go a swear word on her own incompetence, she run up the stairs, leaving the henchcat and the trembling kitten behind her.
There it was, the door that would led her to her final fate. The queen took a deep breath and crossed the threshold.
And, obviously, as any other cat not blinded by the fire of revenge would have imagined...
...Macavity wasn't there.
Sorry for the cliffhanger (again)!. I hope my little seminar on sociopathy (courtesy of Dr. Demeter) hasn't been too boring... I've done a little research on that subject, so none of the described symptoms are fictional. Special thanks to North Carolina Wesleyan College for the information provided in their webpage.
Next chapter in a week. Tell me what you think!