Chapter 2: Pinch Me
Fiona quickly led Shrek and Donkey through a couple of alleys and many streets. Donkey got left behind once; they found him proclaiming loudly to a gathered crowd that he was dying after coming close to being run over. When Shrek approached the people all screamed and ran away. For the rest of the trip, Shrek carried donkey.
Finally, the three stopped in front of a run-down trailer park. Fiona led Shrek and Donkey to the most run-down trailer of all.
"I thought you were a.. princess?" Shrek asked.
"I am. Well, not really. See, my dad's first name is King and my mom's first name is Queen. So my first name is Princess, my middle is Fiona," she explained.
Donkey, meanwhile, had become quite interested in the rust that had formed on the metal sides of the trailer.
"Hey, Shrek – wonder why old Farquad's men don't turn reddish-brown like this?"
"You miniature beast of burden! Isn't it obvious that the stuff was invented after our time?" Shrek said, annoyed.
Fiona walked up to the door and knocked. A minute later a lady opened the door. She wore too much makeup (though Shrek and Donkey didn't notice – they didn't know what makeup was) and wore loose clothes.
"Mom!" Fiona exclaimed. Then a man came up behind the lady. He was mostly bald but had a giant smile that looked almost glued onto his face.
"Pinch me, King. Is that our Princess?" the lady said excitedly. The man, meanwhile, had become much too occupied staring at Shrek and Donkey.
"What are you?" he asked, the grin still on his face.
"Er, um, I'm Shrek, an ogre, that's Donkey.. a donkey."
"Woooow," Donkey said. Fiona's mom screamed and fainted.
"You talk?" the man asked, grinning more.
"I talk! I just realized how important that is to the humor of this story. I talk!" Donkey started skipping around singing 'I talk, I talk, I talkidy-talk.' Fiona ignored him.
"Dad!" she pulled her father into a big hug.
***
That night at dinner (which consisted of cereal bars) Fiona attempted to explain why she was in Shrek and Donkey's time.
"See, when that witch cast a spell on me, she not only turned me into an ogre at night, but she sent me way back in time."
"So that's what happened to you!" Fiona's mother exclaimed.
"You turn into an ogre?" her dad asked. Then, Fiona was surrouned by the huge light.
"The glowstick returns," Donkey gasped. Fiona landed back in her seat as an ogre and smiled.
"Yup."
Fiona's mother fainted.
Fiona quickly led Shrek and Donkey through a couple of alleys and many streets. Donkey got left behind once; they found him proclaiming loudly to a gathered crowd that he was dying after coming close to being run over. When Shrek approached the people all screamed and ran away. For the rest of the trip, Shrek carried donkey.
Finally, the three stopped in front of a run-down trailer park. Fiona led Shrek and Donkey to the most run-down trailer of all.
"I thought you were a.. princess?" Shrek asked.
"I am. Well, not really. See, my dad's first name is King and my mom's first name is Queen. So my first name is Princess, my middle is Fiona," she explained.
Donkey, meanwhile, had become quite interested in the rust that had formed on the metal sides of the trailer.
"Hey, Shrek – wonder why old Farquad's men don't turn reddish-brown like this?"
"You miniature beast of burden! Isn't it obvious that the stuff was invented after our time?" Shrek said, annoyed.
Fiona walked up to the door and knocked. A minute later a lady opened the door. She wore too much makeup (though Shrek and Donkey didn't notice – they didn't know what makeup was) and wore loose clothes.
"Mom!" Fiona exclaimed. Then a man came up behind the lady. He was mostly bald but had a giant smile that looked almost glued onto his face.
"Pinch me, King. Is that our Princess?" the lady said excitedly. The man, meanwhile, had become much too occupied staring at Shrek and Donkey.
"What are you?" he asked, the grin still on his face.
"Er, um, I'm Shrek, an ogre, that's Donkey.. a donkey."
"Woooow," Donkey said. Fiona's mom screamed and fainted.
"You talk?" the man asked, grinning more.
"I talk! I just realized how important that is to the humor of this story. I talk!" Donkey started skipping around singing 'I talk, I talk, I talkidy-talk.' Fiona ignored him.
"Dad!" she pulled her father into a big hug.
***
That night at dinner (which consisted of cereal bars) Fiona attempted to explain why she was in Shrek and Donkey's time.
"See, when that witch cast a spell on me, she not only turned me into an ogre at night, but she sent me way back in time."
"So that's what happened to you!" Fiona's mother exclaimed.
"You turn into an ogre?" her dad asked. Then, Fiona was surrouned by the huge light.
"The glowstick returns," Donkey gasped. Fiona landed back in her seat as an ogre and smiled.
"Yup."
Fiona's mother fainted.