Disclaimer: Friends and all of its characters belong to Bright, Kauffman,
and Crane along with NBC and Warner Bros. Babynames.com is owned by the
site's administrators. I have nothing but affection for both of these
entities. And I'm not making any money off of either of them.
Author's Note: I got all of my information for this chapter off of babynames.com. If you go to the site they have all sorts of fun information including a random re-namer. If you type in CHANDLER MURIEL he is renamed as MERLIN SERENO. MONICA (assuming her middle name is ELIZABETH) turns out to be BLISS TARA. I originally had that in the story but it didn't really fit. Still I thought it was cute and that you'd enjoy reading it. If you type in the names Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, Joey, and Rachel in the site it mentions that the names are associated with the Friends TV characters. Let's just pretend Chandler and Monica don't see that part or something. I also used my own name in here—just a little self promotion. LOL There may be another chapter or two in the fic as I'm interested in seeing C and M prepare for their baby. I hope I can write more. I find it hard writing the characters because I want to keep them close to the show and that's kind of tough sometimes. On that note, please be aware that I feel the "Chandler" in this fic is more like Season 7 Chandler in that he's showing a sweeter, less sarcastic (and due to my own non-wit) less funny side. I'm going to try and perk him up if I can get later chapters done. So, I hope I haven't written him too poorly. Sorry for this extremely long note! I'm finished now. Really. :)
Making Room
Monica emerged from her bedroom early on a Saturday morning to find her husband already seated at the kitchen table, eating a bagel and looking intently at his laptop screen. She rolled her eyes heavenward and walked towards him, asking, "Are you looking at porn again?"
Chandler started and looked up quickly, swallowing and shaking his head at her. "What do you think?"
"Well," she said, opening the refrigerator and pulling out a pitcher of orange juice, "I think it's a good possibility given your track record with porn sites."
"Ah, but I'm only doing research when I'm looking at those sites...and you often reap the benefits of my very scientific...research," he said, grinning unrepentantly at her.
She sat down across from him and shook her head, showing her exasperation with him. "I think you're the one who reaps the benefits..."
He grinned and looked back down at the screen. They continued to sit in silence for a few moments, Monica drinking her juice and Chandler looking at his website, until Chandler looked up and moved to a sideways position in his chair. "Come here," he said patting his leg, motioning for her to sit in his lap.
"Oh, no," Monica said, moving her chair back, "I'm not falling for that trick again."
Chandler grinned. "One time I did that..."
Monica looked at him.
"Okay, two times..."
Monica stared at him, incredulous.
"Okay, three times. But, as I recall, those times are when you reaped the benefits..."
Monica snorted, but a blush rose into her cheeks, as she remembered..
"Why are you so convinced I'm looking at porn anyway? I look at plenty of other websites."
"Oh, okay," Monica said, "I forgot about E!Online."
"Hey!" Chandler exclaimed, looking hurt. "I also visit Access Hollywood and Entertainment Tonight's sites."
Monica raised her eyebrows and nodded, barely containing a smile. Chandler looked at his computer screen for a moment before again motioning her over by patting his lap.
Monica, heaving a great sigh and standing said, "Okay...but if there's porn on that screen you're in trouble, mister."
Chandler raised his hands in mock surrender. "No porn, sir!"
Monica walked over and settled into his lap, kissing his cheek and muttering, "You think you're so cute..." before turning to look at the computer screen. Her eyes widened and she looked at Chandler, pleased. "You're looking up baby names?"
"Yup. BabyNames.com, to be exact. I've been thinking of what to name the little bambino. You know, the baby is due in like 3 months and we haven't really talked about names at all—except for when you vetoed my idea to call him John McClane Bing."
Monica shook her head, "Honey, I love you, but there's no way we're naming our baby after your favorite character from Die Hard."
Chandler rolled his head back and stared at the ceiling, "But it was one of Joey's better ideas—at least I got him to quit referring to the baby as Joey Jr."
"That's true," Monica mused, "but we don't even know if the baby is a boy. We could have a baby girl."
"You're right!" Chandler exclaimed, kissing Monica on the cheek. "So, if it's a girl we'll name her Holly McClane Bing."
Monica laughed unappreciatively, "I don't think so, Bing. Why don't we look at your baby names site and come up with a name we both like?"
"Or we could do that instead," Chandler said, turning his attention back to the laptop's screen. "Are there any names that you really love?"
"Well....Emma, but seeing as that option is gone...I'd have to say not really, other than, of course, Daniel."
"Hmmm...let me just..." Chandler paused as he awkwardly typed around Monica, entering the name "Daniel" into the computer database, "aha! Daniel. Meaning God is my Judge." Chandler scrunched his forehead up, "Doesn't that sound a bit harsh for a baby?"
"Well," Monica began, pouting her lips out in concentration, "maybe. But I just love that name so much! I had a doll when I was little and his name was Daniel. I carried him everywhere with me—practicing to be a Mommy."
Chandler smiled, "You do realize this baby won't be a doll, right?"
Monica rolled her eyes at him, "Besides we could call him Danny when he's young and Dan when he grows up."
"Ah, yes. Dan the Man. Unlike Chandler, you can rhyme Dan with just about anything."
"Hey, you're the one that's always complaining about Chandler. What does Chandler mean, anyway?" Monica asked, curious.
Chandler typed his name in, making a face at the results. "Candle-Maker? Man! Even the meaning of my name sucks."
"Well, what did you think it meant, sweetie? Blood Thirsty Killer? And, look, the popularity rating of your name is fairly high? See? Apparently people can rank the names with 1 being Hate It and 5 being Love It. You've got a 3.2." She paused for a moment, reading the results, "But your name is also unisex."
"We already knew that, didn't we? Remember Little Baby Girl Chandler? Let's look up Monica, then." He typed it in quickly and was surprised at the results, "Advisor. That suits you well. You're always advising us."
Monica grinned, happy with the meaning of her name. "But, wait! Look—Monica's only got a Love It rating of 2.0!"
Chandler laughed, quieting only when Monica glared at him. He back-pedaled quickly, "Well, they obviously don't know what they're talking about...I mean, they probably haven't met any Monica's. I know that I personally LOVE the name Monica...do you want to name the baby Monica Jr.?"
Monica shook her head, unhappy.
Chandler grinned at her and kissed her temple. "Look, babe, it doesn't matter what ranking your name got. At least the meaning of it isn't associated with...wax."
"That's true," Monica said, taking over the mouse from Chandler and scolling it across the screen, "Ooh! Look at this! Soap Opera Character names! I wonder if "Drake" is listed. Joey would love that!"
Chandler raised his eyebrows and nodded as Monica looked down the list. "Look! It's here. Drake! I've got to go get Joey!" Monica rose from Chandler's lap, preparing to run out the door, when Chandler stopped her.
"Uh, babe—its Drake from The Young and the Restless."
"Oh," she said, sitting back down, "let's not tell Joey that..."
Chandler made a noise of agreement.
"Well, let's get back down to naming our baby! Are there any names you like, honey?"
"Well," Chandler said, clicking on a Word screen that was minimized on the bottom of the page, "here's the list of names I like."
"Hmmm..." Monica studied the list intently, "Carissa, Grace, Kayin, Matthew, Keith, and Zane. Hmmm...I like these, too! Carissa means "beloved", Grace is, well, "grace", Kayin "long awaited child"," Monica stared tenderly at Chandler for a moment before continuing, "Matthew, "God's gift", Keith, "warrior", and Zane, also "Beloved". How did you come up with these names?"
"I used the "Search This Meaning" link and searched meanings that I though fit...us and our situation. All except for Keith. I just like that name. I'll have a macho, warrior type son!" Off Monica's look he amended, "Or a sweet, caring well-rounded son..." he lowered his voice, "with a warrior's soul!"
Monica pressed her lips into a line and nodded. "Well, let's look up my favorite names and then we can get down to the business of picking the perfect names."
"Yeah, no Chandler Muriel Bing's in this bunch," Chandler said, smirking.
Monica busily searched the site for a perfect list of names while Chandler watched. "Okay!" she said, beaming, a few minutes later, "Here's my list! Okay, I've got Mariam, meaning "wish", Amanda, meaning "worthy of love", Hannah, meaning "Grace of God", Jackson, meaning, "son of Jack", Zachary, meaning "remembrance" and Connor, meaning "much wanted"."
"Okay, so let's name our baby! Let's see...how about Amanda Kayin Bing?"
"Uh..." Monica shook her head, "you know, now that I think about it, there's a lot of Amanda's in the world. Let's try out one that isn't quite so...popular."
"You know Emma was the number 2 girls name in the nation in 2003? Emma's going to have a lot of friends with her name when she gets older. I wonder what that would be like? I've only ever met the Chandler who was named for me."
"Well, I'd like for our child to be somewhere in between there. I don't want him or her to have a name that is extremely common, but a little out of the ordinary isn't so bad."
"Okay," Chandler said, looking at the list, "how about...Daniel Connor? I like the sound of that."
Monica's eyes lit up. "Daniel Connor...I love that!" Monica stood and looked at Chandler, gesturing to the open space next to her. "Hi, I'm Monica and this is my son, Daniel Connor."
"Just think—that could be the name we could be yelling for the next 18 years. 'Daniel! Don't do that!', 'Danny, put that down!', 'Dan, listen to your Mother!', Danny, Danny, Dan, Dan, Danny!"
Monica laughed, "Okay, but remember—we're not getting a dog. Daniel will be a boy."
"I know that." Chandler smiled, "Okay, let's move on to the baby girl possibility. How about you choose since I just chose Daniel's name?"
"Okay, let's see...ummm...Hannah...no, um...Carissa. Grace. Oh! Carissa Grace!" Monica brought her hands up to her mouth, "Oh, Chandler! That's our baby girl's name!"
Chandler grinned. "I like it! 'No, you cannot date until you're 30, Carissa!', 'No boys anywhere near the house, Carissa!'... 'I know how boys think, Carissa!'...I think that's it, too, babe."
Monica threw her arms around Chandler's neck. "Just think...in 3 months we'll meet either Daniel Connor or Carissa Grace for the first time."
"Yeah, I just hope the little one likes his or her name."
Monica looked at Chandler quizzically, "What makes you think he or she wouldn't?"
"Come on Mon, what if you'd had the chance to be named after a character from Die Hard? Wouldn't you be bummed to find out that you weren't?"
Monica smiled and shook her head, "Wow, I just can't believe we've named our baby!"
"Yeah," Chandler nodded, "there's only one thing left to discuss."
"Oh?" Monica looked confused, "What's that?"
"What's the baby's last name going to be? Bing, Geller, Geller-Bing?"
Monica's eyes widened and she forced a laugh, waving her hands in the air, "Let's not talk about that now."
"Yeah," Chandler said, kissing Monica on the nose, "we'll come back to that later. And if all else fails maybe we can all drop our last names and opt for McClane."
Monica rolled her eyes and pulled away from Chandler, a smile playing on her lips, as she walked away and into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind her.
"What?" Chandler asked the empty room, "What'd I say?" Looking down he pulled up a Word Document from his computer screen and typed:
Chandler Muriel
Monica Elizabeth
Daniel Connor or Carissa Grace
THE BINGS
He saved the document to a disk with the intention of printing it out and placing it under the bathroom door.
-end
Author's Note: I got all of my information for this chapter off of babynames.com. If you go to the site they have all sorts of fun information including a random re-namer. If you type in CHANDLER MURIEL he is renamed as MERLIN SERENO. MONICA (assuming her middle name is ELIZABETH) turns out to be BLISS TARA. I originally had that in the story but it didn't really fit. Still I thought it was cute and that you'd enjoy reading it. If you type in the names Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, Joey, and Rachel in the site it mentions that the names are associated with the Friends TV characters. Let's just pretend Chandler and Monica don't see that part or something. I also used my own name in here—just a little self promotion. LOL There may be another chapter or two in the fic as I'm interested in seeing C and M prepare for their baby. I hope I can write more. I find it hard writing the characters because I want to keep them close to the show and that's kind of tough sometimes. On that note, please be aware that I feel the "Chandler" in this fic is more like Season 7 Chandler in that he's showing a sweeter, less sarcastic (and due to my own non-wit) less funny side. I'm going to try and perk him up if I can get later chapters done. So, I hope I haven't written him too poorly. Sorry for this extremely long note! I'm finished now. Really. :)
Making Room
Monica emerged from her bedroom early on a Saturday morning to find her husband already seated at the kitchen table, eating a bagel and looking intently at his laptop screen. She rolled her eyes heavenward and walked towards him, asking, "Are you looking at porn again?"
Chandler started and looked up quickly, swallowing and shaking his head at her. "What do you think?"
"Well," she said, opening the refrigerator and pulling out a pitcher of orange juice, "I think it's a good possibility given your track record with porn sites."
"Ah, but I'm only doing research when I'm looking at those sites...and you often reap the benefits of my very scientific...research," he said, grinning unrepentantly at her.
She sat down across from him and shook her head, showing her exasperation with him. "I think you're the one who reaps the benefits..."
He grinned and looked back down at the screen. They continued to sit in silence for a few moments, Monica drinking her juice and Chandler looking at his website, until Chandler looked up and moved to a sideways position in his chair. "Come here," he said patting his leg, motioning for her to sit in his lap.
"Oh, no," Monica said, moving her chair back, "I'm not falling for that trick again."
Chandler grinned. "One time I did that..."
Monica looked at him.
"Okay, two times..."
Monica stared at him, incredulous.
"Okay, three times. But, as I recall, those times are when you reaped the benefits..."
Monica snorted, but a blush rose into her cheeks, as she remembered..
"Why are you so convinced I'm looking at porn anyway? I look at plenty of other websites."
"Oh, okay," Monica said, "I forgot about E!Online."
"Hey!" Chandler exclaimed, looking hurt. "I also visit Access Hollywood and Entertainment Tonight's sites."
Monica raised her eyebrows and nodded, barely containing a smile. Chandler looked at his computer screen for a moment before again motioning her over by patting his lap.
Monica, heaving a great sigh and standing said, "Okay...but if there's porn on that screen you're in trouble, mister."
Chandler raised his hands in mock surrender. "No porn, sir!"
Monica walked over and settled into his lap, kissing his cheek and muttering, "You think you're so cute..." before turning to look at the computer screen. Her eyes widened and she looked at Chandler, pleased. "You're looking up baby names?"
"Yup. BabyNames.com, to be exact. I've been thinking of what to name the little bambino. You know, the baby is due in like 3 months and we haven't really talked about names at all—except for when you vetoed my idea to call him John McClane Bing."
Monica shook her head, "Honey, I love you, but there's no way we're naming our baby after your favorite character from Die Hard."
Chandler rolled his head back and stared at the ceiling, "But it was one of Joey's better ideas—at least I got him to quit referring to the baby as Joey Jr."
"That's true," Monica mused, "but we don't even know if the baby is a boy. We could have a baby girl."
"You're right!" Chandler exclaimed, kissing Monica on the cheek. "So, if it's a girl we'll name her Holly McClane Bing."
Monica laughed unappreciatively, "I don't think so, Bing. Why don't we look at your baby names site and come up with a name we both like?"
"Or we could do that instead," Chandler said, turning his attention back to the laptop's screen. "Are there any names that you really love?"
"Well....Emma, but seeing as that option is gone...I'd have to say not really, other than, of course, Daniel."
"Hmmm...let me just..." Chandler paused as he awkwardly typed around Monica, entering the name "Daniel" into the computer database, "aha! Daniel. Meaning God is my Judge." Chandler scrunched his forehead up, "Doesn't that sound a bit harsh for a baby?"
"Well," Monica began, pouting her lips out in concentration, "maybe. But I just love that name so much! I had a doll when I was little and his name was Daniel. I carried him everywhere with me—practicing to be a Mommy."
Chandler smiled, "You do realize this baby won't be a doll, right?"
Monica rolled her eyes at him, "Besides we could call him Danny when he's young and Dan when he grows up."
"Ah, yes. Dan the Man. Unlike Chandler, you can rhyme Dan with just about anything."
"Hey, you're the one that's always complaining about Chandler. What does Chandler mean, anyway?" Monica asked, curious.
Chandler typed his name in, making a face at the results. "Candle-Maker? Man! Even the meaning of my name sucks."
"Well, what did you think it meant, sweetie? Blood Thirsty Killer? And, look, the popularity rating of your name is fairly high? See? Apparently people can rank the names with 1 being Hate It and 5 being Love It. You've got a 3.2." She paused for a moment, reading the results, "But your name is also unisex."
"We already knew that, didn't we? Remember Little Baby Girl Chandler? Let's look up Monica, then." He typed it in quickly and was surprised at the results, "Advisor. That suits you well. You're always advising us."
Monica grinned, happy with the meaning of her name. "But, wait! Look—Monica's only got a Love It rating of 2.0!"
Chandler laughed, quieting only when Monica glared at him. He back-pedaled quickly, "Well, they obviously don't know what they're talking about...I mean, they probably haven't met any Monica's. I know that I personally LOVE the name Monica...do you want to name the baby Monica Jr.?"
Monica shook her head, unhappy.
Chandler grinned at her and kissed her temple. "Look, babe, it doesn't matter what ranking your name got. At least the meaning of it isn't associated with...wax."
"That's true," Monica said, taking over the mouse from Chandler and scolling it across the screen, "Ooh! Look at this! Soap Opera Character names! I wonder if "Drake" is listed. Joey would love that!"
Chandler raised his eyebrows and nodded as Monica looked down the list. "Look! It's here. Drake! I've got to go get Joey!" Monica rose from Chandler's lap, preparing to run out the door, when Chandler stopped her.
"Uh, babe—its Drake from The Young and the Restless."
"Oh," she said, sitting back down, "let's not tell Joey that..."
Chandler made a noise of agreement.
"Well, let's get back down to naming our baby! Are there any names you like, honey?"
"Well," Chandler said, clicking on a Word screen that was minimized on the bottom of the page, "here's the list of names I like."
"Hmmm..." Monica studied the list intently, "Carissa, Grace, Kayin, Matthew, Keith, and Zane. Hmmm...I like these, too! Carissa means "beloved", Grace is, well, "grace", Kayin "long awaited child"," Monica stared tenderly at Chandler for a moment before continuing, "Matthew, "God's gift", Keith, "warrior", and Zane, also "Beloved". How did you come up with these names?"
"I used the "Search This Meaning" link and searched meanings that I though fit...us and our situation. All except for Keith. I just like that name. I'll have a macho, warrior type son!" Off Monica's look he amended, "Or a sweet, caring well-rounded son..." he lowered his voice, "with a warrior's soul!"
Monica pressed her lips into a line and nodded. "Well, let's look up my favorite names and then we can get down to the business of picking the perfect names."
"Yeah, no Chandler Muriel Bing's in this bunch," Chandler said, smirking.
Monica busily searched the site for a perfect list of names while Chandler watched. "Okay!" she said, beaming, a few minutes later, "Here's my list! Okay, I've got Mariam, meaning "wish", Amanda, meaning "worthy of love", Hannah, meaning "Grace of God", Jackson, meaning, "son of Jack", Zachary, meaning "remembrance" and Connor, meaning "much wanted"."
"Okay, so let's name our baby! Let's see...how about Amanda Kayin Bing?"
"Uh..." Monica shook her head, "you know, now that I think about it, there's a lot of Amanda's in the world. Let's try out one that isn't quite so...popular."
"You know Emma was the number 2 girls name in the nation in 2003? Emma's going to have a lot of friends with her name when she gets older. I wonder what that would be like? I've only ever met the Chandler who was named for me."
"Well, I'd like for our child to be somewhere in between there. I don't want him or her to have a name that is extremely common, but a little out of the ordinary isn't so bad."
"Okay," Chandler said, looking at the list, "how about...Daniel Connor? I like the sound of that."
Monica's eyes lit up. "Daniel Connor...I love that!" Monica stood and looked at Chandler, gesturing to the open space next to her. "Hi, I'm Monica and this is my son, Daniel Connor."
"Just think—that could be the name we could be yelling for the next 18 years. 'Daniel! Don't do that!', 'Danny, put that down!', 'Dan, listen to your Mother!', Danny, Danny, Dan, Dan, Danny!"
Monica laughed, "Okay, but remember—we're not getting a dog. Daniel will be a boy."
"I know that." Chandler smiled, "Okay, let's move on to the baby girl possibility. How about you choose since I just chose Daniel's name?"
"Okay, let's see...ummm...Hannah...no, um...Carissa. Grace. Oh! Carissa Grace!" Monica brought her hands up to her mouth, "Oh, Chandler! That's our baby girl's name!"
Chandler grinned. "I like it! 'No, you cannot date until you're 30, Carissa!', 'No boys anywhere near the house, Carissa!'... 'I know how boys think, Carissa!'...I think that's it, too, babe."
Monica threw her arms around Chandler's neck. "Just think...in 3 months we'll meet either Daniel Connor or Carissa Grace for the first time."
"Yeah, I just hope the little one likes his or her name."
Monica looked at Chandler quizzically, "What makes you think he or she wouldn't?"
"Come on Mon, what if you'd had the chance to be named after a character from Die Hard? Wouldn't you be bummed to find out that you weren't?"
Monica smiled and shook her head, "Wow, I just can't believe we've named our baby!"
"Yeah," Chandler nodded, "there's only one thing left to discuss."
"Oh?" Monica looked confused, "What's that?"
"What's the baby's last name going to be? Bing, Geller, Geller-Bing?"
Monica's eyes widened and she forced a laugh, waving her hands in the air, "Let's not talk about that now."
"Yeah," Chandler said, kissing Monica on the nose, "we'll come back to that later. And if all else fails maybe we can all drop our last names and opt for McClane."
Monica rolled her eyes and pulled away from Chandler, a smile playing on her lips, as she walked away and into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly behind her.
"What?" Chandler asked the empty room, "What'd I say?" Looking down he pulled up a Word Document from his computer screen and typed:
Chandler Muriel
Monica Elizabeth
Daniel Connor or Carissa Grace
THE BINGS
He saved the document to a disk with the intention of printing it out and placing it under the bathroom door.
-end