Title: A Good Man
Author: Meg Kenobi
Rating: PG
Summary: Will Turner learns a vital lesson when he meets Jack Sparrow's
only loyal lady friend in Tortuga; woman of surprising contrast. An
experiment in self-insertion -- what if Jack befriended not Mary-Sue, but
the typical ff.net woman.
Author's note: Someone had to ask the question: Can self-insertion be done honestly and well? Might as well be a quasi-respected hater of Mary-Sue who asks the question. How would your typical fic writer fit into Jack Sparrow's life? I'll give you a hint: it's different if she doesn't have long blond hair, violet eyes, and a surprising secret. Please be honest in your reviews; this was an experiment. I have never written anything like this, which is probably for the best. Does it work? Is this better than Mary Sue? Either way, this is probably a one shot. I took a lot of liberty in making Jack a friend to inserted me, but it was somewhat necessary to prove my point.
A Good Man
"Jack Sparrow," she drawled in mock-seriousness, her accent marking her at once lower class. Much to Will's surprise, Jack spun on his heel, a manic smile lighting his face.
"Rebekah Sturn," He appraised her with his typically spastic mannerisms. Suddenly he lunged at the young woman and embraced her for a moment. He drew back shortly, the both of them laughing. Will stared, entirely confused by the familiarity with which the two greeted one another. The woman certainly did not seem like the sort who's company Jack normally pursued
She wore a shapeless ecru blouse that faded without event into a skirt of thick brown muslin. Her wrists appeared from the gathered sleeves, adorned with bangles and coin bracelets and her small hands were littered with half a dozen rings. She was not at all like the handful of other women Jack had 'introduced' Will to. This girl was not tall, voluptuous and lovely. On quite the other hand, she was squat and rather plump. Her features were coarse and her eyes were a dull matte gray. Her skin seemed rough and weather beaten, in stark contrast to the porcelain beauties from earlier that night. Her plain brown hair was tightly plaited and possessed an uninviting sheen that suggested it was quite unwashed. Despite her plain appearance, Jack appeared thrilled by the encounter. The two were volleying rapid-fire questions and responses at a pace neither Will could not follow. Utterly lost, Will cleared her throat, and Jack's attention maniacally snapped to him.
"Where are my manners?" Jack wondered allowed, seeming to search his pockets for the lacking social graces. "Oh, that's right. Pirate," he shrugged as though statement of his profession were explanation enough. Rebekah gave a derisive little snort.
"William, this is my dear friend, Rebekah." Jack proclaimed this loud enough for all of Tortuga to hear, gesturing wildly for each individual he indicated. "Rebekah, this is Bootstrap's son," her eyebrows rose is marked surprise.
"Sit down, both of you. have a drink. So where are you two off to, then?" The girl questioned them curiously
"Two fold: Rescue damsel in distress and reclaim my ship. You know, we could use your help," Jack responded.
"Anytime Jack. I could leave tonight."
"No, not with us. I only need some maps."
"What?" She seemed stung by the request, but Will wasn't certain why.
"Not for this trip, mind you, I've already got my effects, but when I take up the command of the Black Pearl again--."
"Jack, you can't even read. You need a navigator. I need a ship. It's only natural."
"I can probably get Anamaria back to navigate. Or someone. I only need the maps."
"Jack, you need someone you can trust. Take me with you." Will found the desperation in her voice uncomfortable. He eyed Jack warily.
"Look, luv, you know how it is."
"No, I suppose I don't. The only woman on Tortuga who wasn't ashamed to know you is the last woman you would take with you. I used to think it was because I was a woman. But now there is Anamaria. So I am not, what, woman enough?"
"Maybe if your father had a ship, but he owns a bar, 'Beka. I have a reputation," Jack was desperately avoiding the bottom line.
"You have a reputation," she whispered, "Of being surrounded by beautiful women who hate you. I couldn't risk destroying that." The young woman stormed off into the crowd.
"Right then. Move on now, buy maps later," Jack muttered as he rose to his feet, emptying his drink. Will did not move.
"C'mon, before someone expects us to pay for those drinks," Jack offered with what he obviously thought to be an ingratiating smile.
"Jack, you were absolutely horrible to that woman. I would never dream of treating Miss Swann in such a manner."
"Look, Will, this strumpet of yours--," Jack began, an unusual edge of agitation on his voice.
"Miss Swann is a proper lady, not a strumpet, Jack," his voice cool and angry.
"Oh, even better, Miss Swann, she's a real humble girl, right? In your league? Probably daughter of a smith or a miller? Maybe a stableboy's child?"
"This is ludicrous, Jack, you know she's the governor's daughter."
"Right, right. But she's real plain? Downright ugly even? Unkempt, a little fat, and uncorsetted?"
"What are you saying? You saw her; she is a radiant beauty. She is the most perfect creature God has ever made. What is your point?" Jack whirled around to face his naive companion, a fury in his eyes.
"My point, Will Turner, is that you are in no place to judge me, savvy? You're father was a good man and a pirate. I can claim one of the two. But as far as I've seen, you're neither." With that, Jack Sparrow turned sharply and silently, strutting off into the rancor of a Tortuga night.
Author's note: Someone had to ask the question: Can self-insertion be done honestly and well? Might as well be a quasi-respected hater of Mary-Sue who asks the question. How would your typical fic writer fit into Jack Sparrow's life? I'll give you a hint: it's different if she doesn't have long blond hair, violet eyes, and a surprising secret. Please be honest in your reviews; this was an experiment. I have never written anything like this, which is probably for the best. Does it work? Is this better than Mary Sue? Either way, this is probably a one shot. I took a lot of liberty in making Jack a friend to inserted me, but it was somewhat necessary to prove my point.
A Good Man
"Jack Sparrow," she drawled in mock-seriousness, her accent marking her at once lower class. Much to Will's surprise, Jack spun on his heel, a manic smile lighting his face.
"Rebekah Sturn," He appraised her with his typically spastic mannerisms. Suddenly he lunged at the young woman and embraced her for a moment. He drew back shortly, the both of them laughing. Will stared, entirely confused by the familiarity with which the two greeted one another. The woman certainly did not seem like the sort who's company Jack normally pursued
She wore a shapeless ecru blouse that faded without event into a skirt of thick brown muslin. Her wrists appeared from the gathered sleeves, adorned with bangles and coin bracelets and her small hands were littered with half a dozen rings. She was not at all like the handful of other women Jack had 'introduced' Will to. This girl was not tall, voluptuous and lovely. On quite the other hand, she was squat and rather plump. Her features were coarse and her eyes were a dull matte gray. Her skin seemed rough and weather beaten, in stark contrast to the porcelain beauties from earlier that night. Her plain brown hair was tightly plaited and possessed an uninviting sheen that suggested it was quite unwashed. Despite her plain appearance, Jack appeared thrilled by the encounter. The two were volleying rapid-fire questions and responses at a pace neither Will could not follow. Utterly lost, Will cleared her throat, and Jack's attention maniacally snapped to him.
"Where are my manners?" Jack wondered allowed, seeming to search his pockets for the lacking social graces. "Oh, that's right. Pirate," he shrugged as though statement of his profession were explanation enough. Rebekah gave a derisive little snort.
"William, this is my dear friend, Rebekah." Jack proclaimed this loud enough for all of Tortuga to hear, gesturing wildly for each individual he indicated. "Rebekah, this is Bootstrap's son," her eyebrows rose is marked surprise.
"Sit down, both of you. have a drink. So where are you two off to, then?" The girl questioned them curiously
"Two fold: Rescue damsel in distress and reclaim my ship. You know, we could use your help," Jack responded.
"Anytime Jack. I could leave tonight."
"No, not with us. I only need some maps."
"What?" She seemed stung by the request, but Will wasn't certain why.
"Not for this trip, mind you, I've already got my effects, but when I take up the command of the Black Pearl again--."
"Jack, you can't even read. You need a navigator. I need a ship. It's only natural."
"I can probably get Anamaria back to navigate. Or someone. I only need the maps."
"Jack, you need someone you can trust. Take me with you." Will found the desperation in her voice uncomfortable. He eyed Jack warily.
"Look, luv, you know how it is."
"No, I suppose I don't. The only woman on Tortuga who wasn't ashamed to know you is the last woman you would take with you. I used to think it was because I was a woman. But now there is Anamaria. So I am not, what, woman enough?"
"Maybe if your father had a ship, but he owns a bar, 'Beka. I have a reputation," Jack was desperately avoiding the bottom line.
"You have a reputation," she whispered, "Of being surrounded by beautiful women who hate you. I couldn't risk destroying that." The young woman stormed off into the crowd.
"Right then. Move on now, buy maps later," Jack muttered as he rose to his feet, emptying his drink. Will did not move.
"C'mon, before someone expects us to pay for those drinks," Jack offered with what he obviously thought to be an ingratiating smile.
"Jack, you were absolutely horrible to that woman. I would never dream of treating Miss Swann in such a manner."
"Look, Will, this strumpet of yours--," Jack began, an unusual edge of agitation on his voice.
"Miss Swann is a proper lady, not a strumpet, Jack," his voice cool and angry.
"Oh, even better, Miss Swann, she's a real humble girl, right? In your league? Probably daughter of a smith or a miller? Maybe a stableboy's child?"
"This is ludicrous, Jack, you know she's the governor's daughter."
"Right, right. But she's real plain? Downright ugly even? Unkempt, a little fat, and uncorsetted?"
"What are you saying? You saw her; she is a radiant beauty. She is the most perfect creature God has ever made. What is your point?" Jack whirled around to face his naive companion, a fury in his eyes.
"My point, Will Turner, is that you are in no place to judge me, savvy? You're father was a good man and a pirate. I can claim one of the two. But as far as I've seen, you're neither." With that, Jack Sparrow turned sharply and silently, strutting off into the rancor of a Tortuga night.