Chapter 1: First Attraction, Then Obsession
-----~~~~~(Seymour's POV)~~~~~-----
It was the time when I accompanied Measter Mika to Luca for a blitzball tournament. As I moved forward to announce the arrival of the old maester, that was when I saw him, jumping childishly, eagerly and most ironically, innocently as he tried to catch a glimpse of the famous Maester Mika. It wasn't the fact he was eager to meet the old man that made me noticed him but the fact that how I was at first captured by the way sun reflected beautifully against his equally shinning hair or the way his sky-blue eyes twinkled, free from any misery and suffering that I often saw in the eyes of people of Spira.
At that moment, I knew that he was different, exceptional in some way that I couldn't fathom and that made me carved to get closer to the boy who managed to capture my attention in a mere second. I carved to have a taste of innocent he held inside because I've forgotten how it would felt to be innocent; I lost it when I ended my father's pathetic life and watched my mother took her own life.
And so, I, after giving a brief speech about the occasion for the day without ever taking my eyes from the mysterious boy, gave the prayer sign and walked down the gangplank ever so slowly. From the look of his youthful face, he knew I was watching him… no scrutinizing his face as his fair complexion reddened slightly in self-consciousness. The simple response from him made me curved a small smile for I knew he found me sensual when I walked down the wooden board and he turned away from me.
So, my first impression wasn't wrong. He was innocent in every way. And my cold heart gave a startled squeezed.
"Lady Yuna…" I greeted the brown-haired woman and gave another prayer sign. I tried not to look at him when I was addressing her. That would be insulting.
She returned my gesture with much more gracefulness than I could do. "Maester Seymour. I'm honored for your presence."
Of course she should be honored. I was the most respected and the most talented summoner and my father was Maester Jyscal, the one who uphold the Yevon teaching. I came from a respectful lineage. Strange when I couldn't feel any pride when I thought of my lineage. For me, my heritage was my curse and I'd longed to be free from it, to be remembered other than my father's son.
When everybody else left the dock, eager for the tournament to begin, I stayed behind for a while, wanting to gather back my composure that was slowly crumbling at the mere sight of the golden boy. It was not good. I was never the man who lost the serene and the calmness. Why would he hold so much effect on me? As I straightened my heavy robe, I began to realize I wasn't alone. When I turned around, I saw him.
Him. The childish, eager and innocent, innocent golden boy stared at me with a slight trace of nervousness.
I couldn't help but stared back him, trying to guess his age. He was young, kind of short and a very pleasant sight to behold. Seventeen? Eighteen perhaps? In compared of me, he was slightly young. For me, of course. But then, since when age became a barrier for me to get what I want?
I performed another prayer to him, as to greet him in way a maester should, and when I saw he clumsily returned the prayer, I hid an amusement smile. Yes, my another guess wasn't too off either. He certainly came from a place where Yevon wasn't his way of life. "Yes?" I asked smoothly.
"Um…" It was the first time I heard him spoke; it was a little childlike and slightly smooth but not silky voice, and I added another thing I like about him in a mental list. He then, raised his hand and scratched his messy blonde lock. "I don't mean to rude or anything but…well… why were you staring at me just now?"
I had a lot of conquest in past, women or men. A man in my position attracted lovers like honey attracted bees. I had never complained it; it kept my bed from getting cold and my past demon from consuming me. I had also enjoyed the gushing compliment from my lovers about my eyes, my living hair, how they complimented each other and how my fine physical body completed the package, no matter how shallow and empty the sounded. I didn't need the emotional complexity, not when I had a masterful plan to accomplish right now.
Some of my past lovers boldly approached me and tried to seduce me. And never in my recalls, I ever rejected those advances. Call me whore or slut for selling myself but a partner a night kept the insanity away.
But when the golden boy asked the question, he lacked the seductive intention and his face was filled of confusion and curiosity but not lusty stares. I found that utterly refreshing and totally fascinating. I wanted to get close to him more. "Did that bother you?" I murmured softly and took a step ahead, closing the gap between us.
He widened his clear sapphire eyes a little bit, as if he sensed an innuendo in my question but couldn't identify what. And my attraction grew every second I looked at him. "N…No, I guess. I just thought you have something in your mind."
"Concerning you?" I could help but to give him another murmured question.
"Heh, perhaps," he chuckled freely and now was blushing softly. Obviously, the thought that I might be interested in him completed vanished. "I wasn't used to that kind of look before, so I just assumed…"
He was too carefree, too honest for his own good. He wasn't suited in this suffering world. I wondered who he really was. "May I ask a name of yours?"
"Why?" A simple counter without any suspicion in it.
"Because you don't seem like any of the local people." I was enjoying my pointless conversation with him, so I made no inclination to leave him even tough I knew I should accompanied Measter Mika at the opening blitzball tournament. "And you don't dressed like one, either."
"Oh…" He looked down at his attire and let out a sheepish grin that lightened his whole feature. Honestly, I never thought a smile could do that to someone's face but to him, the smile seemed to shine from within. My fascination to him seemed endless now. "I am Tidus. I am a blitzball player in Besaid Auroch."
"Ah, the losing team…" I curved up a small smile. I knew, no matter how strong the attraction, I simply couldn't throw my self-constrain.
"Hey!" The boy complained good-naturedly as he scratched his golden locks again. "That's my team you know!"
"Right, forgive me, Tidus." I said his name with subtle caressed that it would take a professional to detect it. And as far as I am concerned, Tidus was downright ingenuous. Attractively ingenuous. It was so hard to keep the demon inside me at bay when such a beautiful prey was in front of me.
Then, to my utter detest, a loud sound blared, signaling the beginning of the opening of blitzball tournament. I bowed a little, knowing how much he found the prayer gesture uncomfortable, before saying, "I have to go. Measter Mika would probably be expecting me right now."
"Yeah, I should go too. Wakka, the captain, would have my balls if I don't go now." Tidus said jokingly as he bowed back, seemingly relieved not to perform another prayer sign.
I walked in front of him and when we started to go separated ways, I couldn't resist seeing the youthful face tainted with blushes again. "Tidus…"
He stopped and turned to look at me.
"If your captain doesn't want your balls , I would gladly take them…" With that I let out a slightly teasing and a slightly lusty smile before I turned around and walked with the elegance I'd practiced for so long.
As I walked, I could imagine the way Tidus's huge eyes filled with disbelief at my intentional words. And I couldn't help let out a soft chuckle at the priceless images and waiting another opportunity to meet the golden boy.
I don't know why I felt so intrigued about this Maester Mika. Yeah, people talked about his high and mighty rank as maester and I didn't know anything about maester stuff. Of course I was curious as hell! High ranked, probably an old man with bulging stomach with stick to support it. Someone told me that Maester Mika had ruled Spira long enough for another generation to begin.
Hey, I maybe lost in this strange world, but that didn't mean I have to act all gloomy and disinterested. After all, Spira seemed to be an exciting place with its aeons, summoners, pilgrimages and strange clothing. And Spira also had… As I jumped to see the spoken maester, I saw him; the tall blue-haired man … had a totally unbelievable looking summoner with startling blue eyes! I knew he was summoner because of his clothing, of course. And he looked rather serene, the same expression that Yuna always wore. What was this? Was there a teaching in Yevon telling all the summoners must looked calm no matter what happened?
If that so, than Yevon teaching was definitely not for me. I couldn't pretend not to be excited if I was excited and not to be angry if I was angry. Life was all about simplicity…
Soon, I found myself no longer needed to jump and brought another round of humiliation to Wakka after that outburst about winning the cup - hey, I told you that straining myself was not the way I lived my life, didn't I? – when people began to step back and did the blitz winning signs and for the first time, I stood up in the middle of bowing people. Man, talk about self-conscious…
But it was then when the odd looking and coloring blue haired man fixed his intense gaze on me. Maybe it was only me, but I could almost feel the sharp penetration of his icy gaze on me, asking without words about who I am. Am I that different from people of Spira? Why people kept asking me where I came from?
The searching look was so long and so strong that I started to feel warm blood rushing slowly up to my face, tainting the usual pale face. No one had ever wanted to look at me – to really, really look at me – ever since I was a little boy. My old man? If I slept a thousand times and dreamt about it a thousand times, he would never look at me like I was worthy to him. My mom? She was so busy with her heartbreak to even notice me. Auron? That stoic, one-sentence-only-consists-no-more-than-ten-words guy? Why would I even think he would look at me?! And now, in the middle of Luca, there was a man staring at me as if he was penetrating my deepest thought, as if he truly saw me and not another blitzball star…
You know, I would gladly stared back at him with all the crumbling defiance I tried to pull, trying to look deeper into his mesmerizing eyes, if he didn't took that exact moment to curve up a knowing smile. A knowing damn smile! Damn it! Was I that transparent? And I started to feel my face burned hotter. I admitted defeat as I turned around, looking at anything but his eyes.
Then, I heard him spoke to the people in front of him. It was the first time I heard his voice and it suited his appearance perfectly. How should I describe his voice? Smooth, silky and full of hidden agendas. But I wouldn't go so far by saying that his voice was devious. Close to devious but not quite. Since I couldn't look into his eyes, couldn't get myself away without drawing too much attention, I satisfied myself by looking at Maester Mika. Not a very nice view but I had not much of a choice now, hadn't I?
At the sound of soft but firm creak of gangplank, I knew, the blue-haired man was walking down. My eyes tore away from Maester Mika and looked at the man. Strange how he could walk with such elegance with robe that heavy. It did look heavy to me but to him, it looked as if he was floating. Man, I knew I got it bad…
"Lady Yuna…" He greeted Yuna softly as he gestured a prayer. Again I thought how at ease he was around the ever-gawking people of Luca.
"Maester Seymour. I'm honored for your presence." Yuna returned his gesture. I almost laughed aloud at the similarity in the equally serene expression when they greeted each other. Yep, there was definitely a teaching about maintaining a calm expression in Yevon…
Seymour? Quite an original name but somehow, for someone like me, who knew nothing what his name means, I thought the name was rather nice to be pronounced regularly. And a measter too. I knew I was right when I guessed he was a summoner.
After a brief talk between two summoners, people started to clear the docks and ran towards the place where blitzball was going to be held. Yuna and her guardians too started to go to the very same face. I started to follow them but hastily stopped when I saw Maester Seymour lagged behind. I paused as my brain whirled indecisively. Should I talk to him? Should I ask him why he stared at that way? Or should I just let bygone be bygone? But I had never felt a stare that intense in my whole life before and I wanted nothing more than to grasp the stare.
Then, Seymour suddenly turned as if he felt my presence and for a while he stared at me with the same deep look he gave me earlier. I gulped nervously for I didn't know how to response to such an overwhelming attention before. He greeted me with the usual Yevon custom and I clumsily returned it. Beside his suave and elegance, I felt inadequate. And to think I was supposed to be the one from the sophisticated machina city of Zanarkand.
"Yes?" Seymour's voice was softly spoken but I nearly jumped in surprise.
"Um…" I started hesitantly. I was not good with subtle words or flowery phrases, so I didn't have any idea how to say my curiosity. Instead, I said with blatant honesty and I swore that I had never blushed this many times like this before as I scratched my head. "I don't mean to rude or anything but…well… why were you staring at me just now?"
The blue-eyed man looked as if he was taken aback with such an honest question and for a long time he just looked at me; perhaps musing about the question and about the level of my insanity. Then with he stepped forward surely and I began to feel an exciting chill shot through my vein. "Did that bother you?"
My eyes widened a little at the sudden and unexpected attack. Did that bother me? Maybe it did bother me but not in a way that was unpleasant. "N…No, I guess. I just thought you have something in your mind." Damn my nervous stutter!
"Concerning you?" Another husky murmur.
What was this? Was this man tried to embarrass me further? "Heh, perhaps," I tried to chuckle freely as I blushed softly. Hey, maybe he just looked because I looked different. Not that it didn't happened before. "I wasn't used to that kind of look before, so I just assumed…"
He looked thoughtful for a while. "May I ask a name of yours?"
"Why?" I asked back because somehow I think it wouldn't seem right to just give in my name without a good reason.
"Because you don't seem like the local people." Seymour pointed the obvious and I bit my lips when I saw his intense eyes looked down to my body, scrutinizing again. "And you don't dress like one, either."
"Oh…" I looked down at my clothes and let out a sheepish grin that I usually did when I realized I had just thought of something stupid. Well, since he already gave me a reason, I saw no problem in giving away my name. "I am Tidus. I am a blitzball player in Besaid Auroch."
"Ah, the losing team…" He smiled softly. I blinked at his insulting words but couldn't find any reason to be angry.
"Hey!" I complained with a grin as I scratched my golden locks again. "That's my team you know!"
"Right, forgive me, Tidus." He then stopped at whatever he wanted to say next when a loud siren blared. Oh shit, the tournament! Wakka was going to be piss at me! I opened my mouth to excuse myself first but Seymour beat me to it. "I have to go. Maester Mika would probably be expecting me right now."
"Yeah, I should go too. Wakka, the captain, would have my balls if I don't go now." I said jokingly
I let Seymour walked in front of me, enjoying the last sight of his tall and muscular physique. But then, when we started to go separated ways, Seymour halted me with a single calling. "Tidus…"
I immediately stopped and turned around to acknowledge him. And nothing prepared me of what he had said then.
"If your captain doesn't want your balls , I gladly would take them…" And he smiled; a smile that was a combination of teasing and lusty before he turned around and walked away.
I, in the other hand, couldn't find the strength to move my legs as I stared, dumbfounded at Seymour hinted words. I thought he just stared at me because he thought I was different and weird guy with strange clothes. And now… he wanted my… balls ? What was going on here? …what…why…? My thoughts were incoherent for a while but in the midst of thinking storm, I realized that my face again felt so hot with self-consciousness…
-----~~~~~(Seymour's POV)~~~~~-----
I sat back, for the first time; I enjoyed the blitzball matches and found myself hoping Besaid Auroch to win the championship, no matter how impossible that hope might be. I mean, ten years without getting through the first round? How could I support Besaid Auroch when I knew I should go for my own hometown? But of all the matches Besaid Auroch played, I frowned when I couldn't find the particular golden player. Could it be that Tidus lied to me about whom he really was? Even though I was only being able to talk for a few minutes, he left me an impression that he wasn't the kind of person who lied.
But where was he?
"You seem to be enjoying this, Seymour." Maester Mika spoke to me. "I wonder what's so special about today's tournament in comparison of previous years?"
As usual, my expression didn't alter a bit from the serene and pleasant but I did kind of surprise to realize the old measter actually noticed my subtle enjoyment. I gave him a sideway glance, covering half of my blue-ice eyes with my heavy lashes. "Nothing changes, maester. I'm merely enjoying a few lasts pleasure Spira has got to offer."
"Power in your grasp is not a pleasure?" Maester Mika rubbed thoughtfully his wrinkled chin. Everyone would have thought that gesture to be thoughtful, but I had been beside Maester Mika ever since the death of my father and I could see power-lust burned in his eyes.
I turned my gaze back to the huge water sphere in front of me, feeling disgusted at the lustiness in Maester Mika's eyes. I almost smirked at the irony of my disgust. I hated the power-lust portrayed in his eyes, and yet I knew I also lusted the same thing every time I watched Sin killed and consumed everything.
"Maester's power seemed so little right now, Maester Mika." With that I shut all my will to continue the conversation. Talking to Maester Mika made me raw inside, made the yearning to escape myself from my life increased and made me eager to become the next Sin. I just wanted to escape my life in Spira and began a new identity that I earned myself.
And with the final match about to begin any second; Luca Goer against Besaid Auroch, which I had no doubt Luca Goer was going to emerge as victor, I focused on the watery sphere, hoping to catch a glimpse of the golden boy.
And fate didn't disappoint me… The captain of Besaid Auroch seemed to be injured and when the players swam inside the sphere, my spine gave a chill when I saw Tidus swam inside with an exceptional gracefulness and skills.
I never considered myself as poetic before. Formal yes, sensual perhaps but poetic? No. Watching Tidus tackling, dodging and passing with utter abandonment as if he was finally where he belonged made me bit my lips and strain the sudden impulse to conquer every single life from him. He swam like a true merman, every inch of him screamed of freedom, recklessness and wildness and from far I could see he grinned at the inadequacy of Luca Goer's players. My admiration and obsession increased in an alarming pace when he did an incredible shot that managed to knock down two players before the blue ball launched into the goal.
Besaid Auroch was for the first time leading the game and all because of one unknown player. It made me wondered even more about the mysterious boy. How could a player this good still remained undiscovered until now? Where did he really come from?
I watched enviously at the water that seemed to clung to him intimately, wishing I could do the same. Streams of water teased his soft golden hairs and the bubbles of air surrounded him, creating an ethereal aura around him and making him look as if he was a mere illusion. He was a true illustration of sheer masculine beauty… And I called myself to be un-poetic person. I found myself couldn't breathe properly and my long, graceful fingers grasped the seat handles tightly. I was once thought I knew what an obsession was, but watching Tidus playing inside the watery sphere, I knew I was wrong.
Obsession had never been this sweet and had never been this painful either. All that I knew, I must have this blitz player one way or another.
"Maybe the different isn't in the tournament." I heard Maester Mika mused softly. "Maybe it is the player that changes."
I hated at the sudden lost of my barrier because Maester Mika knew the reason I was enjoying the tournament. Throwing another icy glance to old maester beside me, I wished to know how much he had guessed my enjoyment.
"Who is the player you covet?" Came a question from Maester Mika but to me, it was an answer. The old maester knew nothing about my attraction to certain golden-haired player.
"It is none of your concern, Maester Mika," I answered politely and heard the final siren, signaling the match was over. To my much satisfaction, Besaid Auroch won one to nil and I took the siren as a sign to leave the reserved dais for important guests. As I disappeared from the open dais, I took a final look at the sphere, allowing a small smile to appear at the sight of excited Tidus as he swam in back and I turned around to leave.
Yes, my masterpiece plan could use a little side-pleasure… And now, in my mind I'd got one person, particularly a blonde with blue eyes, for me to invite into my little pleasure. And yes, Maester Mika, power in my grasp was not a pleasure, not when somebody like Tidus out there, begging me to conquer him in every possible way…
Author's Note: I love Seymour and I love Tidus too. I think they are perfect in twisted way. I'm still thinking of whether to include Auron in this mess and make it a triangle. Don't worry; I have the plot in my head. It's only the matter of whether or not adding cream topping on a cake. Please read and review… thanks.