Author's Note: Okay, so once again sorry for the massive wait. I don't really have an excuse except that my muse hates me. Big thanks to Nat for beta-ing and Janine for being my brain and getting me over my paranoia....sort of.

-&-

Tristan lay on the couch at the Gilmore house watching his girlfriend who was sitting on the floor, her school books surrounding her. She was studying while he was studying her. Of course. He couldn't help it; she just looked so damn cute.

He was fighting the urge to reach out and touch her. It was hard, but he didn't want to move too fast with Rory. He knew she had very little experience with guys, and he didn't want her to assume he was just in this relationship for sex. But every time he was near her, he found it hard to let go. Every time she touched him he wanted to do nothing more than to show her exactly what she did to him.

Rory was starting to notice though. There was this frustration on his face that he couldn't quite contain. He was a sixteen year old boy after all; it wasn't too hard to figure out that he had urges. But it wasn't his urges she was worried about, it was her own. Every time she was with him she seemed to lose all her inhibitions and just followed his lead. Tristan made her feel safe, like she was allowed to be as close to him as she wanted without feeling embarrassed. She forgot about the fact that he had been with girls who were much more experienced than her, because he made it seem like she was the only one he ever wanted. She craved his touch, wanting more every time he came close.

And this was just so wrong. She wasn't ready to have sex. She was not even supposed to be thinking about having sex while still in High School, that fact had been drummed into her head since she was old enough to know what sex was. And she had been okay with that. Until now.

So, the fact that she was even thinking about it with Tristan scared her. She had never thought about it with Dean. Dean never even gave her the impression that he wanted that.

But Tristan was different. Every little sigh, or moan, or sound out of Tristan when they were making out let Rory know that he was thinking about it. In fact every time he looked at her, she knew he was thinking about it.

And it actually made her feel good. She felt wanted. And it was a good feeling. And she wanted him too, so much. But then that voice in her head would come back again, telling her that this wasn't her and that she knew the consequences of doing this. Her head and her heart were in conflict every time she was with Tristan. It had never been this complicated with Dean.

But the complication didn't stop her enjoying her time with Tristan. They had a lot of fun every time they were together. He had taken her out quite a few times, and they'd talk and kiss, and it would be perfect. She felt herself growing more and more attached to him every day.

"Tristan..." She turned her head to smile at the blonde.

"Yes, Mary?"

"Stop staring at me and get down here and study," she said, trying to be stern.

"I'd much prefer it if you would get up here so I can continue studying you," he teased.

Rory rolled her eyes at him, but didn't stop him when he reached over and pulled her up onto the couch. She landed awkwardly, her body half covering his. Tristan wasn't complaining. He pulled her up properly, wrapping his arm around her waist and bringing her body tight against his as his lips sought hers out.

Rory got lost in the kiss; everything that she had been studying for the last hour disappearing from her mind until all there was left was the feel of Tristan's lips.

"Tristan..." She pulled away, lifting her head to look at him. "My Mom could be home any minute."

"No way, she's at Luke's, you know how they are."

"But..."

"Stop thinking so much, Rory," he commanded.

And then he flipped them over quickly so that Rory was trapped beneath him leaving her no choice but to give in to his touch.

-&-

Summer was fast approaching and Rory got busy studying for finals. Tristan was always there to distract her, but it ended up backfiring on him because she decided she would make him study too, by offering him rewards afterwards. Tristan liked this plan so he studied almost as hard as she did. It wasn't like he wasn't clever or couldn't study, but he just didn't take it as seriously as Rory. He would much rather be enjoying his rewards than spending a perfectly beautiful day inside studying.

"Come on Tristan, this isn't so hard. I'll let you do anything you want if you get it right," Rory promised one afternoon.

They were sitting in the DuGrey mansion study, going over the material for their English final which was coming up. Tristan was purposely being difficult, because he just couldn't concentrate anymore. Although a lot of the time Rory's own drive was really inspiring, most of the time her mere presence was just a complete distraction. But if he didn't agree to study with her, he'd never get to see her.

"Anything?" he repeated, a mischievous glint in his eye.

Rory suddenly felt like she was setting herself up to get in trouble, but couldn't back down now. "Yes, anything."

"The answer's Emily," he said quickly, dropping his pen and grabbing Rory's hand.

"What? You knew it already?"

"Of course I did." Tristan laughed, pulling Rory up from her seat. She wanted to be angry at him, but she was used to him by now. And it made her smile.

"Tristan...we have to finish this," she tried to protest.

"You said I could have anything I want."

"Yeah, that was before you cheated."

"I did not cheat!" Tristan lied.

"You already knew the answer," she reminded him.

"So? You promised. I want my reward now," he told her, and didn't listen to another word of protest as he took her upstairs to his bedroom.

Rory laughed to herself. It was typical that Tristan's reward would somehow involve going up to his bedroom. Did that boy think of nothing else? Or the real question was, did she even mind?

He quickly made his bed haphazardly and then gestured for her to sit. "Okay, what is it you want?" Rory asked.

"I want you to relax for half an hour and take a real break," he told her and Rory was surprised. "Lie down," he instructed. She frowned at him, but complied, lying on one side of his bed. He came around the other side and lay next to her.

She turned to face him, propping her head up on one hand, and he did the same.

"I guess I've been a little stressed out this week," she admitted.

"Just a little," he teased. "You were starting to sound like Paris."

Rory gasped. "Take that back." She hit him lightly and he just laughed.

"Well okay, not Paris, because no one can reach those levels of scary, but you were getting close."

He leaned over and kissed her softly and she relaxed into his touch. He was right; she had been getting stressed out lately. But it was different for her. At Stars Hollow High she could take her classes and breeze through the exams pretty effortlessly. Chilton, however, was a different story. She had to work hard to catch up and prove she belonged there. She had had a hard enough time fitting in socially, but she didn't mind about that. She needed to fit in academically, that was most important to her. Being with Tristan had made life at school a lot more pleasant lately, but it didn't mean the work wasn't still hard.

But all thought of school and exams seemed to fly out of her mind as Tristan kissed her, his touch the only thing she was thinking about.

Tristan pulled back a little and started to undo the buttons on Rory's shirt. He did it slowly, silently asking her permission, and she nodded, letting him take control. It was weird that she was so willing to put herself in his hands. She had always liked being in control of things around her, but when Tristan was there, she liked letting him guide her.

When Tristan finished with the buttons, Rory lifted up so he could pull her shirt off her shoulders. He leaned down and kissed her flat stomach, and then moved upwards. His kisses were feather light, but they were causing havoc on her senses. His lips moved just above her right breast, kissing the area softly and then moving to the other side.

He moved back up to her kissing her again softly. She looked into his eyes and she could see how much he wanted her. She had never seen anyone look at her the way Tristan did and it scared her.

"Rory..." His voice was hoarse, filled with desire.

"Yeah?"

"I want you so badly," he admitted.

"I want you too, Tristan," she told him seriously. "I just haven't ever..." she trailed off feeling embarrassed.

"Hey..." He turned her face to look at him. "I care about you, okay? We don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with."

Rory smiled. "I don't really know what I'm doing. You've been with all these experienced girls and..."

"Where did you hear that?"

"Girls talk."

"They do, huh? Well, you shouldn't always believe what you hear in the girl's bathroom," he teased. "Isn't that the first rule of journalism or something?"

She laughed. "I guess so."

"Rory...I don't care about the other girls. They're my past. And there wasn't as many as you probably think. Do they bother you?"

"Not really," Rory said. It wasn't like she didn't know that Tristan had been with plenty of girls before. But she was scared that she would pale in comparison to them. "I just don't want to be compared to them."

"Trust me; you won't be. You're the only one I care about."

She knew he was telling the truth. She knew it in the way he spoke to her. She knew it in the way he kissed her. She knew it because she knew him.

"I'm scared," she admitted.

"I won't hurt you," he promised.

"I trust you." Hearing her say that was such a huge relief to him. Because he knew she was telling the truth. She really did trust him. "It's myself I don't trust."

Tristan laughed. "Well as long as you trust me, we should be okay."

He kissed her again and all conversation was forgotten.

-&-

After they talked about it, Tristan was more willing to take chances when they were together. He knew she wasn't ready to have sex yet and that was fine with him. It didn't stop him wanting her every single day, but he wasn't in this relationship for sex. It was so much more than that. But that didn't mean he couldn't show Rory there was so much more they could do without having to go that far.

Rory was a little hesitant at first, but all reason seemed to fly out of her mind the minute Tristan touched her. He was so addictive and she felt herself falling for him more and more each day.

That was why her face seemed to light up when Tristan approached her and Paris in the library one day.

"Hey you," he greeted, taking a seat next to her.

Paris who had been sitting on the other side of Rory just rolled her eyes, annoyed at being disturbed when she and Rory were studying.

"Hey," Rory smiled back, leaning forward and accepting Tristan's kiss.

"What you doing?" Tristan asked, picking up Rory's book and glancing at the cover. "Besides dreaming about your wonderful boyfriend."

Paris made a noise from next to Rory, but Tristan just ignored her. "I hate to break it to you, but at the moment passing the history final is all I'm dreaming about," Rory told him.

"You're one strange girl, you know that?"

"Yep. You've told me many times before. Although I'm dating you so I think everyone knows I'm strange."

Tristan laughed. "Ha. Ha. You're so funny, Gilmore"

"I try."

"I can't wait for this week to be over," Tristan commented. "No more school."

"No more making out in the hallway," Rory added.

"Damn. I am going to miss that."

"I thought so." She grinned.

"But we can spend every day together."

"Like you don't already," Paris muttered, loud enough for them to hear.

"We can go away for a weekend too, if you want," Tristan suggested, ignoring Paris.

"Yeah, good luck with trying to get permission for that one," Rory joked.

"Come on, Ror. Your Mom is cool."

"Do you not remember the hundred ways she was plotting your murder when she walked in on us last week?" Rory reminded him quietly. "I'm still avoiding her a little."

It was true; Lorelai had walked in on Rory and Tristan when they had been alone in Rory's bedroom. They weren't really doing anything...except Tristan seemed to have lost his shirt; luckily Rory was still fully dressed so it hadn't been too bad.

"Oh yeah," Tristan remembered. "Well I'm just going to have to sneak you away."

"Rory..." Paris interrupted. "As entertaining as this is, we really need to study."

"Right. Sorry, Paris," she apologized. "You go," she told Tristan. "We'll talk about this later."

"But..." She leaned forward and kissed him, effectively ending his protests. "I'll meet you after school," she promised.

Tristan kissed her once more, before finally getting up and leaving. Rory watched him leave, a head-in-the-clouds expression on her face.

"Rory!" Paris nudged her, irritably.

"Sorry."

-&-

"So..." Lorelai appeared at Rory's door that evening.

"So?" Rory turned to her mother, knowing there was something on her mind.

"You and Tristan seem to be getting very serious lately..." she continued as she came inside the room and sat on the bed.

"Define serious," she said casually.

Rory was sitting at her desk doing some homework, but turned her attention to her mother. She knew Lorelai had wanted to talk to her about Tristan all week, so she had been expecting this. It didn't make it any less uncomfortable though. And she hated that because she had never been uncomfortable talking to Lorelai about anything.

"You spend a lot of time together," Lorelai explained lamely.

"Mom, if you want to ask me something, please do it."

"It's nothing. I'm just trying to get a feel of what you're thinking. We haven't talked much about Tristan in a while."

"Probably because you don't like him," Rory shot back.

"I like him. I do. I just don't like him touching you..." Lorelai told her. She was only half joking. She did like Tristan, it was just seeing her daughter fall for him so badly, and then the worry of her moving too fast and making the same mistakes she did was always there. She didn't want that for Rory.

Rory rolled her eyes at her mother. "You didn't mind Dean this much."

"I never found you and Dean making out all over the place," Lorelai countered. "Dean respected you too much to do that."

"Tristan respects me," Rory quickly said. "He respects me a lot. We don't do anything I don't want to do. And this is still a little weird..."

"What?"

"Talking to you about this..."

"About what?" Lorelai asked, purposely being difficult.

"You know...sex," Rory muttered.

"Right," Lorelai took a deep breath, as if reminding herself that she was really having this conversation. She didn't want to be her mother and push Rory away. But she also didn't want her sixteen year old daughter to even think about having sex yet. "You're not...having it...right?"

"Of course not!" Rory said quickly.

"But you're thinking about it?" Rory paused for a second and that was enough for Lorelai. "Oh my God, you're thinking about it." She started pacing, muttering to herself. "God, Rory, why did I ever tell you to date this boy? No, wait, never mind. I remember what it was like to be sixteen, it wasn't that long ago. Maybe we should put you on the pill."

"What?" Rory exclaimed.

"Trust me, Rory. It's better to be safe than..."

"Mom!" Lorelai stopped pacing and looked at her daughter. "Tristan and I are not having sex. Not now, and not anytime soon. Trust me. I know you think Tristan is the type of guy who'd pressure me, just because he has some experience, but he's not like that at all."

"I don't think that." Lorelai protested, but Rory just raised her eyebrows. "Okay, maybe a little, but can you blame me?"

"Yes. You have to trust him. And you have to trust that I know what I'm doing."

"I do trust you. I trust you with my life. But then I remember myself and your Dad at that age. We were in love and nothing else seemed to matter."

"Yeah, well I may love Tristan, but I'm not going to just jump into anything," she told her mother, not even realizing that she had used the L word.

"Rory..." Lorelai said, stopping their previous discussion. "You just said you love him."

"What? No, I didn't," Rory said, and then tried to remember what she had said. "Did I?"

"You did," Lorelai confirmed. She didn't know whether she was happy about this fact or not. She knew Rory had had trouble saying it to Dean, and if she really did love Tristan, she was worried that would cloud her judgment when making important decisions.

"It was a slip," Rory said quickly, getting freaked out herself. It had only been about four months ago that she hadn't been able to tell Dean she loved him, and now she was saying it about Tristan?

"Right," Lorelai didn't seem convinced. "You know, you don't have to feel guilty."

"Why would I feel guilty?"

"Because you couldn't say it to Dean. But you're saying it to Tristan."

"I'm not saying it to Tristan. I didn't mean...It just came out."

"That's usually your hearts way of just dumping a big fat revelation on you," Lorelai told her.

Rory sighed. This was way too confusing. One minute she's discussing sex with her mother and then she's letting it slip that she had actually gone and fallen in love with Tristan DuGrey. Was she in the twilight zone?

"But..." Lorelai continued. "Just because you love him, doesn't mean you're ready."

"I know that," Rory said. "I promise I'll be careful. Tristan and I are fine. You don't need to worry about us," Rory assured her mom. "Now I'm kind of tired so..."

"Right," Lorelai got up and headed for the door. "Are you sure you don't want to go on the pill?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. But thanks, Mom."

Lorelai smiled. "See you in the morning."

"Night."

As soon as her mother left the room Rory went to her bed and fell back on it. Did she really love Tristan? She always thought love was such a huge thing, that it couldn't happen just like that.

She had liked Dean a lot, but she had never been able to tell him she loved him. Was it because she didn't get the chance or was it because she was never meant to love Dean? Was Dean's place in her life just as her first boyfriend, nothing more?

She never thought she'd fall in love with Tristan, but now she wasn't sure. She loved spending time with him. She missed him when he wasn't around. She knew his faults, but still cared about him. He made her laugh. And he really cared for her. He treated her really well.

Could love just be a culmination of all these things, or was it just a gut feeling? The feeling of not being able to live without someone. When Dean had broken up with her she had been heartbroken, but she had moved on. If Tristan left her, she didn't think she could move on. She had shared her entire self, mind and body with him, that letting go of that would hurt more than she could bear.

Was this love?

Did it just creep up on her out of nowhere? No, that wasn't true. It had been building from the very first time they had kissed. The past four months had been a rollercoaster ride for their relationship, but this is where she was now. In love with Tristan DuGrey.

Knowing she wouldn't be able to sleep without talking to him, Rory picked up the cordless phone which had been left in her room and dialed the familiar number.

"H'lo?" His sexy drawl came over the phone.

"Hey good looking," Rory said, with a fake girly accent.

"Hi..." Tristan answered, not recognizing the voice at first.

"I was hoping you'd want to hook up tonight. If you know what I mean," she continued. She wanted to laugh, because she was sure Tristan could figure out it was her.

"You know, I'd love to, but I'm actually a taken man," Tristan explained.

"Oh really? That's a shame. But I'm sure what she won't know, won't hurt her, right?" Rory carried on curious as to what he would say next.

"It would hurt me. Because I care about this girl very very much," he said. "Even if she does call me up and try to check on me."

Rory laughed, her voice returning to normal. "Okay, you got me."

"Pretty much from the 'hey good looking'," Tristan told her.

He was rather amused at Rory's behavior. She surprised him more and more each day. She was so much fun to be around.

"Damn. I'll have to work on disguising my voice a little better," she said. "Anyway I just called to let you know I suffered a major embarrassment because of you."

"Oh yeah? What happened? And why is it automatically my fault?" he asked. "You just love putting all the blame on me."

"Well it wouldn't have happened if you kept your hands to yourself for five minutes."

"But I like not keeping them to myself." Tristan grinned. "What happened anyway?"

"I just had the talk with my mother."

Tristan frowned. "What talk?"

"You know, the S-E-X talk."

"Oh," Tristan laughed. "But we're not..."

"...having it, I know," Rory finished. "But since you have that shady 'I want to eat you' look every time you're near me, she's a little worried."

Tristan laughed. "It's not my fault you look good enough to eat."

Rory rolled her eyes, but truthfully it was the little things like that just made her love him more.

"So, what did she say?" Tristan asked.

"Don't have it," Rory joked.

"That would be a lot easier if you were even a little ugly," he joked back. "But you have to go and be beautiful on top of smart and interesting."

"Now you're just buttering me up. What do you want?"

"You," he said easily. "Why do you find it hard to believe I'm just being nice?"

"Because you're never nice," she told him.

"Oh really? When have I ever not been nice?"

She rolled her eyes at his selective memory. "Tristan, you called me names for six months."

"But it was in the name of love," he joked.

There was that word again. Thrown into the conversation casually. Had it not been for her own slip a little while ago she probably wouldn't have noticed it. But now she noticed. Because she was starting to realize that maybe it hadn't just been a slip.

"Rory?" Tristan said, when she didn't say anything.

"Huh?"

"Where'd you go?" he asked.

"Oh...err...nowhere." She shook herself out of her weird thoughts. Things were good between her and Tristan whether she loved him or not, and she was not going to ruin that.

"Okay..." He didn't seem too convinced, because he could tell that she was thinking about something, but he let it go.

"Well I better go, or my Mother will use this as another thing to hold against you," she joked.

"She's just worried about you," he told her wisely. "And I don't blame her."

"Me either. You're a bad influence on me," she joked.

"Oh sure, blame the guy. If I'm not mistaken you don't exactly put up much of a fight."

Rory laughed. "Yeah, yeah. I'll speak to you tomorrow."

"'Night Rory."

"Goodnight."

She hung up the phone and lay back on her bed. Yep, she was one hundred percent in love with him. And her Mother was right, that only made him harder to resist.

This was not good. Not good at all.