This has nothing to do with my other YnM fic. I had this unusually strong urge to write this while re-reading Konnie-chan's 'A Devil's Thrill' (go read it!!!). This is a complete one-shot meant to be depressing. No happy endings here, sorry. ^^;
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"I'm sorry, " Tatsumi repeated, his voice laced with genuine sorrow. He ran a slender hand through his short brown hair, hating what he had to say.
"I tried, I really did. You're...you're a wonderful person, so full of life and love... But I just can't love you the way you love me. I want to, I really do. I just...I don't feel it in my soul. You have an amazing heart, but I'm just not worthy of it."
The man sitting across from him lowered his gaze, trying to hide the agony in his eyes.
"...Are you sure, Tatsumi-san?"
The secretary nodded sadly.
"I do love you, please realize. I wish I could say I'm in love with you... You mean more to me than I ever expected you would. I would only hurt you more if I lied to you, or to myself. I've enjoyed the time we've spent together recently, enjoyed it more than you could know. I have no doubt that you will find someone who can give you the attention and love that you deserve. I'm surprised no one has snatched you up already."
"You never noticed..." his companion said softly.
Tatsumi sighed, acknowledging the truth of the statement.
"What can I say...I'm a fool. I wish you had come along sooner, before..."
"Before you met him," the man finished.
Tatsumi nodded.
"Maybe then...but maybe I still would have fallen for him. Maybe things are meant to happen this way..."
The other man raised his head, glaring.
"What? That I'm meant to have my heart stomped on by a cold, arrogant bastard?!"
The secretary sighed softly.
"I'm sorry, that isn't what I meant. Forgive me?"
The other man's lip quivered, tears spilling over his full lashes.
"You're...you're not cold, Tatsumi-san. I didn't mean that. I'm just...upset."
Tatsumi smiled gently, pulling the other man into his arms soothingly.
"I understand. We're rather in the same situation, aren't we? You have every right to be angry with me. I'm angry at myself for hurting you. This is the last thing I want to happen... If I thought that there was any possibility of a relationship between us working out, I would pursue it relentlessly."
"I know," his companion said softly.
Tatsumi released the man from his embrace, running his hand over the man's arm.
"Can we...can we still be friends? I know you hate me right now, but maybe after a bit of time...?"
The other man looked at him carefully, a somber expression on his normally cheerful face. He lowered his eyes again.
"Sure. I...I'd like that. Just...give me time."
Tatsumi nodded sympathetically.
"Of course. In fact, if you'd like some time off of work...?"
His companion shook his head.
"No, that's okay. I think I just want to be alone right now."
Tatsumi stood, resting his hand on the man's firm shoulder.
"Please remember...I do care about you very deeply. That's why I can't lie to you."
He went to the door, pausing with his hand on the knob. Sighing, he lowered his head and exited the room.
At the table, Watari buried his face in his hands and wept.