Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha
@)~~~~
8 years ago....
She knew she looked good.
It's not just the hair, she thought, it's the effect. The lighting, the dress, the shoes, the smile, the look...I have him....
...only he's not paying as much attention as I'd like him to.
"Hojo?" Kagome gave a radiant smile that was further illuminated by the vanilla scented candles placed in front of her, the flames dancing within her eyes, "Is something wrong?"
She pulled off the questioning quite gracefully considering her line of vision kept darting behind his back in search of a ring box. However, she missed the look in his eye.
"Higurashi...."
"Kagome! Hojo, you haven't called me 'Higurashi' since grade school...." She cutely tweaked his nose while he gave a small smile, blushing and averting his eyes.
"Kagome," she mistook his tone for lovingly, "We've had a wonderful five years together, and they've been so much to me...."
Kagome vaguely wondered if she'd remembered to powder her nose but then mentally slapped herself for thinking like a desperate woman.
"But I can't." She looked up shocked.
"Excuse me?"
"I can't go on. I've...I've...." Kagome stopped him.
"You've...been cheating...haven't you?" She became dead quiet and looked to her right, trying to admire the artistic arrangement of the lilies.
"Well..." Hojo looked downtrodden and went into shock when he saw Kagome perk up.
"It's okay! I mean, it was probably just a little kiss when you were tipsy, right? I mean, you're too sweet to go out and have a full blown--"
"After our first date, Higurashi," Hojo began with the vocal idiocy belonging to a desperate man, "I went home and screwed my neighbor's daughter. Afterwards, I couldn't take it anymore and was about to come to you in guilt when Takeda's blonde secretary invited me for a drink. We went in every direction and she even brought out this little book. Then, your sister--"
Kagome had been taking all this rather well. "Hojo, I don't have a sister."
"Well, we were both really too drunk to worry about that. Then when you wouldn't put out that night at the mountain, I found Yuka and Sayumi--"
"Sayuri, Hojo." Kagome gulped her wine down, her eyes glazing over.
"—and I didn't know they went that way at the time, but yeah...I banged them too...."
"At the same time?"
"Yes. And then there was that hot little number underneath the drive thru window at Denny's--"
"Didn't people see?"
"Yeah. It was kinda kinky. Then two weeks ago, I thought the best way to stop all this was to ask you to marry me, maybe you could have helped me settle down, but then the saleslady did the most incredible thing with a Rolex and a couple nipple rings--"
This time, it wasn't Kagome's voice that stopped him. No, it was reality and the conscious ability to scream that skipped away when her blazing form brained the last few strands of thought and nervous tissue from him with a flower vase.
Knowing she still looked good, Kagome took his wallet and left.
@)~~~~
In another part of the city, a twenty-nine year old hanyou nearly cried in his cubicle. A small fanged grin appeared on his face as he twirled around uncharacteristically.
I have a job!!!
Inuyasha was not one to form thoughts with three exclamation points, but considering his educational history, his position as a head computer engineer was something that would have caused him to herniate in disbelief ten years ago. A lot happens in ten years.
He grudgingly (and mentally) thanked Sesshoumaru. If that perfectionist drama queen transvestite brother of his hadn't pissed him off so much with his "success in life" or whatever he wouldn't have even tried in college.
It was all about the competition to Inuyasha. And now he had won.
...sure it was a cubicle and a snappy stapler that came with the title of "Head Computer Engineer" but it was better than whatever Sesshoumaru was up to...whatever that was. His brother's antics were of no concern to him. Inuyasha had nearly held his father at gunpoint in order to make him (fearfully) choke out he was proud of his position in life and that was just as good as, "You're the most favoritest favorite favorite favorite child of your mother and I and your brother is just a big boa-wearing poo head."
And now, he thought, I'm going to have a beer.
The kitchen in Inuyasha's office was two cubicles to the right and one to the left of Inuyasha's own closed quarters. To get there, he had to pass Matsuura, the medicated software engineer and Yumi, the brilliant eighteen year old who was spared the educational pressure of college by proving her prowess to the previous manager with her hacking skills. They really kept her around for show, but what she didn't know wouldn't hurt her.
However, Inuyasha's little trek to alcohol heaven was spiritually and physically dampered by her. Sure, she had wanted his position, gave the best four years of her life to the job, came with sunrise, didn't leave until the janitor dragged her out by the collar of her immaculate business suit, and most likely gained vulnerability to eye cancer after staring into glowing monitors for hours on end...but she wasn't bitter. At least, that's what Inuyasha thought. It somehow came together as logic in his mind.
She had a plan. Of course, he didn't know this. He just wanted a Heineken.
"IIIInnnuuuuuyaaaaaaaasshhhaaaaaa," she cooed. He looked over at her and smirked. She was cute enough.
"Hey, Kikyo."
She pouted, "Be a darling would you? I can't seem to work my stapler...and you wanted these client finalizations by tomorrow...." She trailed off and looked shamefully at a spot on the cubicle, making sure to expose her neck, collar bones, and several other erogenous zones that Glamour had recommended were ideal in catching a sleazy boss.
"Sure, Kikyo." Inuyasha was a computer engineer. One thing Microsoft 101 never really covered was basic stapler construction. He didn't know that the little staples could be rigged. He didn't know that slapping the damn thing when it was opened wide would aim a tiny, sharp, pseudo-dart at his seductive co-worker. He also didn't learn a lot about women.
"EEK! Assault! I can't believe you, Inuyasha!"
"What? The staple! It just--"
"Is it because I'm a woman, Inuyasha?! Am I a threat to your position?!" "Wha--? No! I was trying to fix the--"
"Fix the old fashioned work system in here? Beat the woman into submission until she knows where she belongs in this misogynistic world?! YOU, my dear boss, will be hearing from my lawyer." And with a swish of skirts, she was gone.
Yumi and Matsuura's heads popped over the edge of the cubicle. Matsuura was certain he'd heard a noise and Yumi was considering employment elsewhere.
Inuyasha looked at his thumb, stabbed painfully with the offending staple.
"Fuuuuuuck....."
@)~~~~
"And so, Inuyasha, my old--"
"Out with the damn verdict, Miroku!"
"The jury was lenient on you, buddy, assaulting a woman in the workplace isn't a wrist-slapping offense there."
"GET ON WITH IT!" Inuyasha roared, glaring at a smirking Kikyo who had mysteriously acquired a broken arm from "an attack by office ware artillery".
"Five years." Miroku said with a definitive smack on his desk.
"Five years of what? Being her love slave? Her personal secretary?...Sesshoumaru's coffee boy?!" Inuyasha felt mild convulsions in his abdomen and prayed it was something involving him and a ravine filled with rabid wolverines.
"Five years in the state detention center."
He blanched. No...jail? The birdhouse? He wasn't Elvis! He couldn't suddenly make all the men named Molly stop in their sodomizing tracks with a fun filled song about blue suede shoes!
"Are you fucking kidding me, Miroku?"
"It was assault, 'Yasha ol' buddy."
"And you're not even sorry??"
"I'm drunk."
"Shouldn't you be going to prison with me then, you bastard?!"
"I'm not flinging pointy objects at women, Inuyasha."
"But it was a fucking stapler! And look!" Inuyasha pulled out his Flintstone bandaged thumb, "It got me in the thumb! How could a half ounce, if even that, stapler break her fucking ARM?!"
"The jury really didn't like your attitude. And besides, as the lovely Kikyo," Miroku wagged his eyebrows while Kikyo clenched her teeth, "pointed out, you're a menace to society."
"A menace?"
Miroku sighed. "I just said that Inuyasha. Besides, I'm sure we could cut your sentence. I'm very disappointed in you. Offending charming women when instead they should instead be--"
"Say it and die!" Inuyasha was a few hairs short of livid...but that was understandable.
"See you in five years, Inu!"
"Rot in hell!"
@)~~~~
8 years ago....
She knew she looked good.
It's not just the hair, she thought, it's the effect. The lighting, the dress, the shoes, the smile, the look...I have him....
...only he's not paying as much attention as I'd like him to.
"Hojo?" Kagome gave a radiant smile that was further illuminated by the vanilla scented candles placed in front of her, the flames dancing within her eyes, "Is something wrong?"
She pulled off the questioning quite gracefully considering her line of vision kept darting behind his back in search of a ring box. However, she missed the look in his eye.
"Higurashi...."
"Kagome! Hojo, you haven't called me 'Higurashi' since grade school...." She cutely tweaked his nose while he gave a small smile, blushing and averting his eyes.
"Kagome," she mistook his tone for lovingly, "We've had a wonderful five years together, and they've been so much to me...."
Kagome vaguely wondered if she'd remembered to powder her nose but then mentally slapped herself for thinking like a desperate woman.
"But I can't." She looked up shocked.
"Excuse me?"
"I can't go on. I've...I've...." Kagome stopped him.
"You've...been cheating...haven't you?" She became dead quiet and looked to her right, trying to admire the artistic arrangement of the lilies.
"Well..." Hojo looked downtrodden and went into shock when he saw Kagome perk up.
"It's okay! I mean, it was probably just a little kiss when you were tipsy, right? I mean, you're too sweet to go out and have a full blown--"
"After our first date, Higurashi," Hojo began with the vocal idiocy belonging to a desperate man, "I went home and screwed my neighbor's daughter. Afterwards, I couldn't take it anymore and was about to come to you in guilt when Takeda's blonde secretary invited me for a drink. We went in every direction and she even brought out this little book. Then, your sister--"
Kagome had been taking all this rather well. "Hojo, I don't have a sister."
"Well, we were both really too drunk to worry about that. Then when you wouldn't put out that night at the mountain, I found Yuka and Sayumi--"
"Sayuri, Hojo." Kagome gulped her wine down, her eyes glazing over.
"—and I didn't know they went that way at the time, but yeah...I banged them too...."
"At the same time?"
"Yes. And then there was that hot little number underneath the drive thru window at Denny's--"
"Didn't people see?"
"Yeah. It was kinda kinky. Then two weeks ago, I thought the best way to stop all this was to ask you to marry me, maybe you could have helped me settle down, but then the saleslady did the most incredible thing with a Rolex and a couple nipple rings--"
This time, it wasn't Kagome's voice that stopped him. No, it was reality and the conscious ability to scream that skipped away when her blazing form brained the last few strands of thought and nervous tissue from him with a flower vase.
Knowing she still looked good, Kagome took his wallet and left.
@)~~~~
In another part of the city, a twenty-nine year old hanyou nearly cried in his cubicle. A small fanged grin appeared on his face as he twirled around uncharacteristically.
I have a job!!!
Inuyasha was not one to form thoughts with three exclamation points, but considering his educational history, his position as a head computer engineer was something that would have caused him to herniate in disbelief ten years ago. A lot happens in ten years.
He grudgingly (and mentally) thanked Sesshoumaru. If that perfectionist drama queen transvestite brother of his hadn't pissed him off so much with his "success in life" or whatever he wouldn't have even tried in college.
It was all about the competition to Inuyasha. And now he had won.
...sure it was a cubicle and a snappy stapler that came with the title of "Head Computer Engineer" but it was better than whatever Sesshoumaru was up to...whatever that was. His brother's antics were of no concern to him. Inuyasha had nearly held his father at gunpoint in order to make him (fearfully) choke out he was proud of his position in life and that was just as good as, "You're the most favoritest favorite favorite favorite child of your mother and I and your brother is just a big boa-wearing poo head."
And now, he thought, I'm going to have a beer.
The kitchen in Inuyasha's office was two cubicles to the right and one to the left of Inuyasha's own closed quarters. To get there, he had to pass Matsuura, the medicated software engineer and Yumi, the brilliant eighteen year old who was spared the educational pressure of college by proving her prowess to the previous manager with her hacking skills. They really kept her around for show, but what she didn't know wouldn't hurt her.
However, Inuyasha's little trek to alcohol heaven was spiritually and physically dampered by her. Sure, she had wanted his position, gave the best four years of her life to the job, came with sunrise, didn't leave until the janitor dragged her out by the collar of her immaculate business suit, and most likely gained vulnerability to eye cancer after staring into glowing monitors for hours on end...but she wasn't bitter. At least, that's what Inuyasha thought. It somehow came together as logic in his mind.
She had a plan. Of course, he didn't know this. He just wanted a Heineken.
"IIIInnnuuuuuyaaaaaaaasshhhaaaaaa," she cooed. He looked over at her and smirked. She was cute enough.
"Hey, Kikyo."
She pouted, "Be a darling would you? I can't seem to work my stapler...and you wanted these client finalizations by tomorrow...." She trailed off and looked shamefully at a spot on the cubicle, making sure to expose her neck, collar bones, and several other erogenous zones that Glamour had recommended were ideal in catching a sleazy boss.
"Sure, Kikyo." Inuyasha was a computer engineer. One thing Microsoft 101 never really covered was basic stapler construction. He didn't know that the little staples could be rigged. He didn't know that slapping the damn thing when it was opened wide would aim a tiny, sharp, pseudo-dart at his seductive co-worker. He also didn't learn a lot about women.
"EEK! Assault! I can't believe you, Inuyasha!"
"What? The staple! It just--"
"Is it because I'm a woman, Inuyasha?! Am I a threat to your position?!" "Wha--? No! I was trying to fix the--"
"Fix the old fashioned work system in here? Beat the woman into submission until she knows where she belongs in this misogynistic world?! YOU, my dear boss, will be hearing from my lawyer." And with a swish of skirts, she was gone.
Yumi and Matsuura's heads popped over the edge of the cubicle. Matsuura was certain he'd heard a noise and Yumi was considering employment elsewhere.
Inuyasha looked at his thumb, stabbed painfully with the offending staple.
"Fuuuuuuck....."
@)~~~~
"And so, Inuyasha, my old--"
"Out with the damn verdict, Miroku!"
"The jury was lenient on you, buddy, assaulting a woman in the workplace isn't a wrist-slapping offense there."
"GET ON WITH IT!" Inuyasha roared, glaring at a smirking Kikyo who had mysteriously acquired a broken arm from "an attack by office ware artillery".
"Five years." Miroku said with a definitive smack on his desk.
"Five years of what? Being her love slave? Her personal secretary?...Sesshoumaru's coffee boy?!" Inuyasha felt mild convulsions in his abdomen and prayed it was something involving him and a ravine filled with rabid wolverines.
"Five years in the state detention center."
He blanched. No...jail? The birdhouse? He wasn't Elvis! He couldn't suddenly make all the men named Molly stop in their sodomizing tracks with a fun filled song about blue suede shoes!
"Are you fucking kidding me, Miroku?"
"It was assault, 'Yasha ol' buddy."
"And you're not even sorry??"
"I'm drunk."
"Shouldn't you be going to prison with me then, you bastard?!"
"I'm not flinging pointy objects at women, Inuyasha."
"But it was a fucking stapler! And look!" Inuyasha pulled out his Flintstone bandaged thumb, "It got me in the thumb! How could a half ounce, if even that, stapler break her fucking ARM?!"
"The jury really didn't like your attitude. And besides, as the lovely Kikyo," Miroku wagged his eyebrows while Kikyo clenched her teeth, "pointed out, you're a menace to society."
"A menace?"
Miroku sighed. "I just said that Inuyasha. Besides, I'm sure we could cut your sentence. I'm very disappointed in you. Offending charming women when instead they should instead be--"
"Say it and die!" Inuyasha was a few hairs short of livid...but that was understandable.
"See you in five years, Inu!"
"Rot in hell!"