Please see the summary for an additional disclaimer. The introduction and toasts (in italics) were borrowed and very slightly altered without permission from http: www(dot)tmclark(dot)comJPtoasts.html For those who need it, a cast of characters is located at the end of this chapter. I changed the last part of "The Wedding" after realizing most churches would frown upon having alcohol on their properties. :-)
Wolf Thank you for your beta-reading services!
Location: The Greendale Country Hills Hotel
Luxuriously soft, white, cotton tablecloths covered the circular tables, each seating eight guests. On top of the tablecloths were sets of fine china, crystal wineglasses, and silverware wrapped inside white linen napkins. A slender, white vase containing three long-stemmed, pink roses and two deep green fern shoots was placed in the center of each table. The rose petals glowed from the illumination of the flames, which danced from the wicks of the two tall, white, tapered candles set to each side of the vase.
A long, oblong table, reserved for the wedding party, was placed at the head of the room. Next to it was a table that held the wedding cakes. The main section of the cake had three tiers; each tier separated and supported by a set of four sturdy, white columns. A strand of pearls outlined the bottom of each layer, while a cluster of pink rosebuds and greenery adorned the tops. Eight other cakes decorated in the same fashion encircled the tiers. The soothing sound of flowing water could barely be heard from the lit waterfall placed under the bottom tier of the main cake.
The cake topper was a custom-made statue of a miniature Conrad and Shana dressed in their wedding regalia. A heart-shaped, crystal backdrop was formed by two adjoining swans facing away from each other. Some thin, white ribbon and lace along with two American flags completed the ensemble.
An adjoining alcove contained a wooden dance floor, which could be seen from almost any angle in the dining room. Hidden on one side of the alcove was a cash bar, a small seating area, and a DJ station. Just as Craig and Jack were performing the last set of sound checks, the vehicles began approaching the hotel's circle drive.
Outside the hotel's main entrance, a doorman opened the rear door of a white limousine. Conrad, still in his full military dress, exited first. Both men then gave Shana their hands as she stepped out of the car. Once inside, the hotel's event coordinator quickly escorted the group to the foyer of the reception area. The very knowledgeable employee assisted with the formation of the reception line, having Conrad and Shana standing in the middle, their respective parents and attendants to either side.
"There's no time for that. Fix it later! The guests will be here any time!" Vince yelled, just loud enough to get Courtney and Shana's attention. Courtney was determined to fix the strands of baby's breath, which had fallen loose when she and Allie yanked off Shana's veil back at the church.
Conrad watched his wife with amusement and muttered under his breath, "That's not going to stay there much longer." Conrad grinned as his mind fast-forwarded past the formalities to when he and his new wife would finally be alone.
Seeing the guests approaching, Courtney cursed the fact that she had been defeated by those annoying little flowers and quickly took her place. An endless sea of people made their way through the reception line, each one stopping to hug the newlyweds. Conrad and Shana were both relieved when they finally greeted the last person in line.
Conrad and Shana spent some time mingling with their guests before taking their seats at the center of the head table. As the waiters brought out the first course of the meal, Patrick rose from his seat and thanked the guests for attending the celebration of his daughter's wedding. Patrick then walked over to the giggling couple.
Shana motioned for Conrad to stop messing around. She knew the look in her father's face - the deep creases in his forehead, his eyes turning small and beady. It was a look Shana had seen only a few times in her life, but she had seen it enough to know to pay close attention.
Patrick lowered himself to his daughter and son-in-law's level and solemnly told them, "The best advice I can give you is that life doesn't always give you a second chance. So treat each kiss, each embrace, each conversation as it though it could be your last. Treasure each and every moment you have together, never giving the other a chance to doubt your love. And as you journey through life may you always stand in the shadows of the favor and grace of God."
As Patrick took his seat, Robert Falcone, Conrad's step-father, rose from his. "On behalf of my loving wife, Isabelle, and the late Alexander Johann Hauser, I wish to thank Mr. O'Hara for hosting this beautiful wedding and reception for our children. Also, I'm sure AJ would join me in thanking each one of you who played a part in getting our son's stubborn ass in gear before he let the best thing in his life walk away." Before Robert sat down, he added, "By the way, I am expecting to have my first grandchild in... nine months." The guests seated in the dining area, who up to that point had been fairly quiet, cheered loudly upon hearing Robert's last comment.
The waiters worked continuously to clear the tables and bring out the next courses of the meal. As the sixth course was being distributed, Dash gently tapped a fork against the side of his wineglass. "May I have everyone's attention? I promise not to be long-winded." Laughter arose from the Joes in attendance, who knew the Warrant Officer could not give a short speech to save his life.
"On behalf of the attendants, I want to thank Mr. O'Hara for hosting this wonderful reception." Moving his focus to the other patriarch, Dash spoke rather boisterously, "Mr. Falcone, it was a pleasure getting Conrad's ass into gear, sir."
Dash turned to the audience and continued, "Conrad has been my best friend and comrade for several years, even before our time with G. I. Joe." Dash walked behind Conrad and tapped his shoulder, "Conrad, buddy, you should have taken the job of selecting a best man more seriously." Conrad glared at his best man and alleged "best friend". As Dash walked back over to his seat, he continued, "But I'm glad it's me because now I get the rare opportunity to say whatever I want to about our 'top kick' in front of all of you and him!
"As long as I've known Conrad, I've never known him to be shy around women or lacking in a selection of beautiful women. Heck, there were a number of times I've borrowed... uh, seen his little black books. Yes, that was 'books' with an 's'. We... uh... moving on before I get both Conrad and myself in a heap of trouble. I'd hate to be responsible for any delays in the production of Mr. Falcone's first grandbaby and my godchild.
"So, how did I manage to get two of the world's most stubborn people together, you ask? Conrad and Shana had unofficially been a couple for quite some time; they just needed some help in admitting they were a couple and madly in love with each other. To help speed things along I had a few well-placed rumors sprinkled here and there, and Voila! The sparks of romance were ignited. Well, it did help to include a healthy amount of alcohol at the right times, too."
Feeling his friend's eyes upon him, Dash laughed. "Conrad, do you even remember why you were partnered with Shana in the first place? I seem to recall you venting at me about the fact Hawk would force you to partner with someone, much less a woman. Conrad, buddy, that was all my doing and did I ever have to do some fast talking to convince Hawk. You can thank your nosy wife for my intervention, since it was repayment for her meddling in Allie's and my personal affairs, for which I am very grateful."
Dash raised his wine glass and said, "Here's to health and prosperity, to you and all your posterity. And them that don't drink with sincerity, that they may be damned for all eternity!" After everyone toasted the couple, but before sitting down himself, Dash smirked and added, "And may all your ups and downs come only in the bedroom!"
Allie rose to give her reply to Dash's speech, "On behalf of the bridal party, I also want to thank Mr. O'Hara for a wonderful evening. No one could ask for a more perfect wedding and reception, of course with exception to the best man's speech. Conrad, doll, what possessed you to pick him?"
"Okay, most of us know my significant other is full of crap, but if Dash wants to take credit for setting the trap, I'll gladly let him. It keeps me out of trouble. I can't tell you how dangerous it can be, as Shana's best friend and roommate. Nor can I tell you all the things we've thrown at each other. Conrad, my advice to you is to watch her shoes, they're her favorite things to throw. Boots take a while to come off, but run for cover if she's wearing sandals, no matter how many or how few the number of straps or buckles."
"Shana and Conrad, you're my best friends and I wish you all the happiness in the world. May you have warm words on a cold evening, a full moon on a dark night, and the road downhill all the way to your door," The guests responded with a variety of cheers, clapping and laughter. Allie, having to get one final word in, announced, "By the way, Brad, I'll be collecting my hard-earned winnings tomorrow evening!"
As the servers cleared the last set of dinner dishes, Conrad and Shana made their way to the cake table. Conrad unsheathed the sword lying behind the cake. Shana carefully placed her hands on the handle of the sharp steel blade alongside Conrad's. Together, they made two downward slices in the cake. Conrad set the sword back on the table. He picked up a small piece of the sliced cake and gently placed it into Shana's mouth. In return, Shana grabbed the biggest chunk of cake she could get hold of and smashed it into her husband's mouth.
"Just you wait," Conrad said while wiping his face with a napkin. The couple picked up their wineglasses and gave each other a short, soft kiss before entwining their arms and sipping their champagne. Afterwards, from the DJ station, Craig asked over the sound system, "Would the bride and groom honor us with their presence on the dance floor, if it so pleases them?" Conrad escorted Shana to the alcove and onto the wooden planks. He took his wife into his arms, signaling they were ready for the music to start.
After the couple's song finished, Craig played a series of pieces selected for the bride and groom and their parents. Shana danced with her father and then with Mr. Falcone. Afterwards, she was spun from dance partner to dance partner, until she couldn't remember with whom she had yet to take a turn.
Making his way to the alcove, with chair in tow, Hector yelled, "Hear, hear! Enough of the dancing, drinking, eating, and being merry junk. Let's get on with what we're really here for." Hector paused for a moment before explaining, "The garter toss!"
Polly, still in her tux but now hovering over Hector's shoulder, mocked, "Tsk, tsk, naughty boy. She's a married lady now." Polly suddenly flew away from Hector, upon whose shoulder she had been faithfully perched the entire evening.
"Hey, Marvin, you still got the recipe for parrot-under-glass?" Hector yelled across the room at the chef who had joined the festivities now that his work in the kitchen was finished.
Shana placed her left leg on the chair revealing her off-white ballerina slippers. Keiko pulled a couple of bobby pins out of her hair and threw them at the bride. "What the... You were wearing those this whole time and had the nerve to make us wear these uncomfortable heels!" Keiko scolded, while trying to hide her laughter. "Girlfriend, there's three of us left and don't think we won't remember this."
Conrad, thinking of how much more comfortable house shoes would have been, replied, "My thoughts exactly, Keiko. Shana thinks only of herself, doesn't she?" Shana playfully lifted Conrad's face, leaned into his ear, and whispered something so quietly only he could hear.
Shana held her dress in place while allowing Conrad to reach underneath to remove the garter. He slowly and gently massaged her calf working up towards her thigh. What am I looking for? Conrad thought, now sporting a mischievous grin as he purposely missed the item. His hands worked their way to the upper part of Shana's thigh.
"Not here," Shana rebuked quietly, yet sternly. Conrad, loving it when the redhead was riled up, continued playing with her thigh, pretending not to be able to locate the garter. Shana, becoming rather frustrated and impatient, guided his hand to the exact location of the elusive item. Conrad slowly guided the garter down Shana's thigh, over her knee, and down her calf, caressing every inch of her silky, nylon-covered legs as he did.
Once he removed the green and white garter from her leg, Conrad flung it behind him, towards a group of boys and men. The toss headed right to Vince and Dash as planned. However, both men dodged it unexpectedly, causing the garter to land straight into the lucky hands of an unsuspecting Wayne. "What the hell am I supposed to do with this?" he asked. Just as soon as he said it, Wayne wished he could have taken back those words. Before he knew it, Dash and Vince were confronting him.
During the distraction, Allie handed Shana a bouquet similar to the bridal piece, only smaller. She then ran back to join the other single women, who had been too busy talking to notice who caught the garter. Shana turned around and tossed the bouquet over her head. Unlike their male counterparts, all the women jumped for the bouquet. Courtney emerged out of the pile victorious, clinging to the sought after prize. However, the tank jockey's countenance changed upon seeing the new 'necktie' Wayne sported.
Courtney muttered, "Oh God, not him. Anyone but Sneeden. Even that kid would have been better. Calm down girl, it's just one picture and nothing else. Yeah, that's right, it's nothing. Hmm, besides this may come in handy when he's yelling at me during his PT sessions."
Dash, having to rub in the fact of what had just happened, asked Wayne, "You know what they say about the couple who catch the garter and bouquet, don't you? It's a good thing she's pretty, huh?"
No freakin' way!" Wayne retorted, not wanting to admit how attracted he was to Courtney when he saw her walking down the aisle back at the church. Being entirely consumed in his thoughts, Wayne didn't realize he was standing with his arm around Courtney until the camera shuttered and flashed. Like second nature, Wayne grabbed the photographer's equipment and stripped it of the film.
"Hey, do you know how much that costs? That was brand new!" The photographer exclaimed. "I'll sue!"
Wayne pushed the photographer aside and threatened, "If any of you damn photo jockeys so much as thinks about trying to get that shot again... You WILL regret the day you were born!"
Conrad noticed his wife snickering at the scene. "Oh no. You'd better not be thinking what I think you're thinking. Beach Head and Cover Girl? I really did not need that image."
"My love, those were your words, not mine, but I'm glad you agree. They are cute together, aren't they?" Shana said, while trying to appear innocent.
"Hey, that's not what I said," Conrad replied, knowing that if he said anything else, his words would get twisted and bent out of shape to serve his wife's purpose.
"Well, they are cute together. Trust me, it'll work. Remember, I'm responsible for setting up both Dash and Allie and Vince and Keiko," Shana said as she began formulating a plan to get Wayne and Courtney together.
"This from the lady who needed some unsolicited help to get her own love life straightened out," Conrad replied. "You're forgetting one little detail. How does good ol' Hector fit into your little scheme? He seems to have a thing for her too. You should have seen those boys back at the church when she walked down the aisle."
Shana laughed, "Hector? Conrad, love, we all know he has a thing for anyone of the opposite sex. Now Wayne, on the other hand..."
"Yeah, well both of them better stay far away from you, Mrs. Hauser," Conrad interrupted as he grabbed Shana's waist and kissed her.
Dash pulled Conrad aside to let him know their vehicle was ready. "Dash, you have no idea how long I've been wanting to ditch this place and finally spend some time with my wife. Alone."
Before Conrad could take a step, Dash grabbed his arm and told him, "One more thing before you go. I'll have some blackmail material waiting for you upon your return." Conrad laughed as Dash explained how the camera and the photographer Wayne attacked were decoys. The real photographer stood a few feet back and off to the side. Dash added, "He claims to have gotten several good shots of Wayne and Courtney."
"So, you and my kid brother planned that whole garter toss thing, eh?" Conrad asked, trying not to draw attention to them.
"That is something I can neither confirm nor deny," Dash smirked. "However, I will go on record saying that Courtney catching the bouquet was a pleasant surprise."
"Don't be too sure of yourself, buddy," Conrad said. "My wife, who, if I may remind you, is your girlfriend's best friend, thinks Wayne and Courtney would make a 'cute' couple. And you know as well as I do that means we will be drafted into her infamous dating service."
Dash, whose face now showed signs of a new alertness, whispered to his friend, "F&#! She hasn't gotten to Allie yet, has she!" Conrad, not knowing where either woman was, shrugged his shoulders.
Dash and Conrad walked back to the alcove to find Shana dancing with her ex-fiancé, Snake Eyes. Dash raised his shoulders and narrowed his eyes, showing his concern. Conrad verbalized his thoughts loud enough for only Dash to hear, "You've got to wonder if he'd go through all that again if he knew back then that she would end up being another man's wife."
Conrad walked up and tapped his wife's dance partner's shoulder. "Mind if I cut in?" Snake Eyes acted like he just woke up from a trance and started waving his hands in all sorts of gestures while stepping away from Shana. Conrad grabbed Snake Eyes' arms to make him shut up. "You know a hell of a lot better than to think I'd be as jealous and overprotective as Dash here. But that doesn't mean I'm into sharing my wife with anyone, including you pal," Conrad joked as he reassuringly placed a hand on the mute man's shoulder. Conrad changed his demeanor and whispered, "I wouldn't have this wonderful lady as my wife if it weren't for you. Thank you."
Snake Eyes bade the couple his congratulations and wished them well, then turned and left. He cursed himself for not doing a better job of hiding his feelings for his ex-fiancée, and at her own wedding to boot. He was thankful everyone was grossly engaged in their own conversations or too busy buying drinks to notice.
After making their way back towards the foyer, Conrad asked, "May I have everyone's attention please?" The crowd of friends and family slowly quieted down. "Shana and I want to thank each and every one of you for joining us to celebrate our wedding. It's getting late and we don't want to keep our driver waiting any longer. The cash bar will stay open for another hour, so hurry up and get your drinks. Craig has promised to keep the music going well into the night, so stay as long as you like."
Conrad knew his team better than to leave that last remark open. "Those of you on duty tomorrow morning are still expected to show up on time. Even your own death will not be accepted as an excuse!"
Conrad and Shana walked back the hotel's lobby and exited through a set of revolving doors. Once outside, they found Ettienne R. LaFitte, Wendell A. Metzger, Malcom R. Willoughby , Brian M. Forrest, Marvin F. Hinton, Ronald W. Tadur, Wallace A. Weems and Gabriel A. Kelly standing in two perfect rows. As the couple approached, Sergeant Metzger, the senior honor guards, gave the commands, "Center, face. Present, arms." The guards raised their Mamelukes, opposite tips abutting in the air to form an archway.
Just as the newlyweds were about to exit the arch, the two guardsmen on the far end dropped their swords and demanded a kiss before allowing the couple to proceed. Being more than happy to oblige, Conrad grabbed his wife, dipping her backwards as he gave her a long, deep, passionate kiss that literally took her breath away. Loud joyous cheers came from those who decided to see the couple off as well as the bystanders who stopped to watch out of curiosity.
Once Shana was able to stand on her own feet again, the two soldiers raised their swords allowing Conrad and Shana to finish their walk. Afterwards, Sgt. Metzger issued the command, "Order, arms." and dismissed the honor guard.
Conrad and Shana waved to their family and friends one final time, before entering their limousine and heading off to spend the night in an undisclosed location; the only way they could ensure their privacy.
To be continued...
Cast of characters, in no particular order:
Shana M. O'Hara - Scarlett
Conrad S. Hauser - Duke
Patrick O'Hara - Shana's Dad
Jack S. Morelli - Dialtone
Craig S. McConnel - Rock 'N Roll
Ettienne R. LaFitte - Gung Ho
Wendell A. Metzger - Leatherneck
Malcom R. Willoughby - Deep Six
Brian M. Forrest - Wet Suit
Marvin F. Hinton - Road Block
Ronald W. Tadur - Dusty
Wallace A. Weems - Rip Cord
Gabriel A. Kelly - Barbecue
Hector X. Delgado - Shipwreck
Dashiell R. Fairborne - Flint
Allie (Alison R. Hart-Burnett) - Lady Jaye
Courtney A. Krieger - Cover Girl
Vincent Falcone - Falcon
Keiko - Jinx (I just picked a name her since it's classified. The character herself is not mine.)
The following are my original characters:
Robert Falcone - Duke step-father and Falcon's father
Isabelle Falcone - Duke and Falcon's mother
Maycale O'Hara - Shana's mother
Alexander Johann "AJ" Hauser - Duke's father