Authoress' Notes: Well, this is it! The Epilogue for "P&C" is finally here! I tried to do it for everyone in the story! Hope you enjoy!

Pikario & Chuigi: Poké Star Saga!

Epilogue: The Epilogue to End All Epilogues! ...Sorta...

So, that was it! Pikario went back home with Peach, Shroomsworth, and a random assortment of Shroomishes that appeared out of nowhere because they were never technically in the story to begin with!

Pikario, of course, went back to living his life normally: You know, getting drunk, killing random bystanders, having sex with Peach, throwing large, harmful objects at Shroomsworth in a random fit of rage, flipping off menaces to society and just about anyone else... the usual stuff.

Peach went back to living her life normally, too... If you can call this shit normal. She's still just a ditzy Raichu running the Shroomish Kingdom with an iron fist! ...Or a toaster or something...

Shroomsworth never did call Lady Luna back for a booty call, mostly because he's on the run from federal accounting... AND NO ONE STILL KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANS!

Bowser was last seen somewhere in Japan with Shigeru Miyamoto and the Evil People from Nintendo, working on the crazy-ass plot for "Mario & Luigi 2", which will eventually be parodied in a strange and unusual way!

The Hammer Bros. in the Border House thingy are still there to this very day, waiting for someone stupid enough to fall into their EVIL JUMP-ROPING TRAP OF DOOM!

Tolstar is now an undead zombie, cursed to haunt the Stardust Fields forever. He's known for stealing pantyhose and taking people's suitcases when they're not looking.

Hammer and Sledge, finally free from Pikario & Chuigi's constant nagging, decided to move back to their house in Uh-Oh Village for no apparent reason! They are also both very mad at each other, because someone seems to have forgotten to grab their finances and Hammers when they moved!

Hoohooros is still on that blasted mountain thingy, just ready and waiting to TAKE OVER THE WORLD AT A MOMENT'S NOTICE! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Blahblahblahnandon still lives in Uh-Oh Village and cusses at everyone he sees because he thinks it's cool... and it is! FUCK YEAH!

Remember that Old Bulbasaur guy in the cave? Turns out he was only a figment of Pikario & Chuigi's imaginations! You see, that's what you get for drinking too much and not admitting to it!

That town thingy in the middle of the Hoogivezahkrap Kingdom is now a barren wasteland that is, ironically, still inhabited, despite the dead Bulbasaurs and Ivysaurs lying around and stuff! No one ever bothered to clean up so that's just the way it is now! DEAL WITH IT!

The Random Ivysaur Guards and Bulbasaur Assistants all decided to retire after they finally figured out they weren't doing there job of guarding the castle very well, especially since the town was in ruins anyway!

Lady Luna considers Shroomsworth dead to her now, since he never gave her his promised booty call like he, um, promised! Instead, she sits around the castle and plays her DS to end! Rumor even has it that she struck a deal with the Evil People of Nintendo to make a new console sometime in 2006, saying it will 'revolutionize' the world!

Like her assistants and guards, Queen Where also decided to retire, quoting, "There's no point in being a queen when there is no one to take over the throne and continue my legacy! I might as well die right here and now and no one would a flying shit!" Rumor has it that the Shadow Queen even charged her for copyright infringement because she never asked to be a queen in the first place! Even though she's not really allowed to be a queen anymore, she still has the title and still gets paid to sit on her ass all day and rule the kingdom! Why? Eh... the name was catchy...

After orbiting around the world for a few weeks, due to Birdo's Almighty Blast Burn, Popple landed in Little Fungus Town and now works as a manager for the arcade! Although, it's said he's close to being fired since he keeps looting the video game machines!

The Red and Blue Oho Jees still live on their little, crazy island in peace... until they kill sanity and take over the world that is...

The Fire and Thunder Gods still live there, too... It's a real shame that they were also just a figment of Pikario & Chuigi's imaginations! (Not to mentions the Oho Jees' too, because they hallucinate so often...)

The Mom Piranha Pikario threw into the water now pollutes the airport's water supply! Not like anyone cares, since everyone's too lazy to do anything about it...

Trunkle was on his way home to ask his nonexistent mom about the equivalent of pie, when tripped over a randomly-placed Puni and died! HA HA!

The Cubones, Captain Marowak, and Bloat now live in the tropics, with all the fast-ass Jynxes and Hermie III, since their boat sank and crap! Gigi and Merri saw they were all bored and out of things to do, so they asked them if they wanted to start a business with them! And now, the Cubones' strip club that was on the ship is run by Gigi and Merri, with the captain as the DJ, the Cubones as the assistants, Bloat as the dumbass bodyguard, the fast-ass Jynxes stripping, and Hermie III selling Christmas tress to confused customers!

It was rumored that Bubbles decided not to commit suicide after all! He instead, joined up with Boddle in running the Yoshi Theater! They now show movies like, "My Yoshi, Yoshi", "The Yoshi King", "A Few Good Yoshies", "Dude, Where's My Yoshi?", "The Green Yoshi", "The Yoshikillers", "Are We On Yoshi's Island Yet?", "Yoshi Potter and the Chamber of Eggs", "Dead Yoshi Walking", "Yoshies in the Outfield", "Eggs", "Yoshizilla", "Tongue", "How Yoshi Got His Egg Back", and the ever-popular "Daddy, Daddy, I Think There's a Yoshi in My Pajamas"!

Harhall still runs his/her creepy Splart business and BUSINESS IS BOOMING! After becoming a millionaire, s/he decided to leave the Hoogivezahkrap Kingdom and now lives in Pussy Heights! Word has it s/he's even been caught cheating with resident Goldbomb on a regularly basis! Goldbomb's wife, Sylvia quotes, "Hey, if that freaky transvestite wants my son of a bitch husband, THEN FINE! I think he's gone off the deep end anyway..." Bub, her son who is the All-Star Player of the regional X-Naut Basketball Championship Playoffs held on Da Moon, quotes, "I like trains!"

Jojora and her idiot Jynx bodyguards haven't been seen Sex's End melted... But people say their ghosts haunt the place anyway, making fun of any non-virgin who dares pass it!

Birdo finally did find a Yoshi boyfriend at the Yoshi Theater! Good for her and bad for the Yoshi!

After being killed by Pikario & Chuigi, Iggy now rises from the dead as undead zombie 4,895,050 times a day! You'd think it'd get a little boring after that, but Iggy still seems to enjoy it!

Morton Jr., on the other hand, is still very alive and picks up Squirtle chicks around the world because you can't put down a Blastiose with a cool star tattoo on his eye!

Lemmy still works as Pennington's assistant in crime and solving murder cases and stuff! They've never solved a case in their life, yet the money just keeps ROLLIN' IN! ...Kinda makes ya think, don't it?

Ludwig is still in Nintendo Jail, held for several accounts of smuggling and sexual harassment to children! Beldam's still there too, but she's starting to get used to it and no one cares about her anyway, so...

Roy and Kirby are still traveling around the world, looking for the perfect pink color! They haven't found it yet, but Kirby quotes, "I know it's out there somewhere! We've just got to find it, that's all!" In their global expeditions, they've found billions and billions of other sweet pink colors that totally pwn! Roy also quotes, "We'll find that color one day! BECAUSE T3H PEENK DON'T' SHREENK!"

Wendy is still a stripper in Nintendo Jail and lovin' every minute of it! Ludwig is jealous of this and tries to get her in trouble by saying she used to work with Microsoft, but it usually just backfires and makes things worse for him!

Larry and the Red and Blue Oho Jees went back to their demented little island and play Baseball/Tennis all day long while listening to booming Hip-Hop music that's so loud, it can be heard all the way in Dreamland!

Cackletta is STILL not dead! Nope! She's just a ghost now, forever haunting the Why What Wheniversity and trying to think of a way to become truly undead and/or possess someone! Whichever comes first, of course!

Fawful was sent to Nintendo Jail with Detention from Beldam, charged for being presumably incorrect! But he was released early on good behavior, so he's out now! No one's seen him since, but rumor has it, he lives at the Why What Wheniversity with Cackletta's not-quite-undead-ghost!

Peasley and Chuigi have practically disappeared off the face of the earth! No one's seen or heard of them since Pikario went back to the Shroomish Kingdom! Pikario doesn't seem to care (like anyone does?) and Queen Where finally gave up trying to make Peasley straight again! After about 2 months, Chuigi finally came back to the Shroomish Kingdom (as a Pichu, for some unexplained reason!) randomly proclaiming, "JUST BECAUSE I HAD SEX WITH A GUY DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN CONTRDICT ME! I'M STILL NOT GAY!" Apparently, Chuigi was thought to have finally lost his virginity after that, but he got it right back because I like watching him suffer! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ...He and Peasley still meet on some occasions, either through mail, the internet, or... PERSONALLY... I'll leave it up you to figure out what that means...

THE END!

...or is it...?

Authoress' Notes: Yay, that's it! We're all done here! Time to pack up and go home! "M&L 2: Partners in Time" comes out sometime in November, so I'll see if I can play through it and get the first chapter up around December or January, depending on when I get it. It's been fun writing this and I hope it'll be the same way when "P&C 2: Time to Bust Some Heads!" (tentative tile!) comes around! Oh, and in case you didn't get the Yoshi part, here's what the parodies were:

"My Dog, Skip"

"The Lion King"

"A Few Good Men"

"Dude, Where's My Car?"

"The Green Mile"

"The Ladykillers"

"Are We There Yet?"

"Harry Potter and the Chamber of the Secrets"

"Dead Man Walking"

"Angels in the Outfield"

"Holes"

"Godzilla"

"Jaws"

"How Stella Got Her Groove Back"

...And I made the last one up, lol.