Here it is - the sequel to 'The Search for the Big Pink albeit Cursed
Diamond'! Long dreaded and long feared, I return to attempt to write a semi-
serious humour fanfic - well, serious by my standards. And even though it's
a sequel, it's fine to be read on its own. I don't own Pirates of the
Caribbean, or any of the characters - haven't even been able to commandeer
them, dagnabbit. Enjoy!
Not all Treasure is Silver and Gold
Chapter 1 - Guess what, another quest
"Here we go," said Elizabeth. She and Will had just returned to Port Royal, and were preparing to break it to Governor Swann that his little daughter was moving with the local blacksmith to Rum Island, the renowned rum trader of the Caribbean which was twinned with Tortuga. Will himself had taken the liberty of carrying a pistol with him along with Stabby, his lucky sword.
"Hey, here's a thought," said Will, "Maybe he'd take it better if I, er, wasn't there?"
"How would that make it better?" said Elizabeth.
"Well, I'd have a head start for when he ran after me challenging me to a duel," said Will. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.
"Come on Will. Be manly!"
"This is manly! Avoiding responsibility!" protested Will.
"You may enter now," said a butler.
"See you," said Will, darting out of the front door before she could object, leaving her with a terrified look on her face. As he headed off down the drive, he heard "YOU'RE MOVING WHERE?!?!?!" As he reached the gate, he heard, "RUM ISLAND?!?!?!?!?" so he rightly assumed she had clarified the point. He decided that he would spend two hours before returning as opposed to just one.
Later, while he was grabbing all his things in the forge - as Mr Brown was asleep he took the liberty of taking his 'cut' from the money in the box in the corner and several swords and other tools - Elizabeth came in.
"Well?" said Will, "How did it go?"
"It all went fine!" said Elizabeth brightly. Too brightly.
"Elizabeth?" said Will warily, "What did you tell him?"
"I, erm," said Elizabeth, "Just that, um, you were..." She trailed off, mumbling the last words indistinguishably.
"What?"
"I said you were, um, dying," she said finally.
"YOU WHAT???"
"I told him that you were leaving me all your money when you died!" said Elizabeth.
"What money?" said Will bewilderedly.
"From your father's estate."
"WHAT estate?"
"Lie a little, lie a lot," shrugged Elizabeth. She raised an eyebrow and smiled. "At least he'll be off our backs until your 'tragic demise'."
"What did you say I was dying from?" said Will.
"Uh, Blacksmith's Blight," said Elizabeth sheepishly, "He kept shouting about how you were just a blacksmith, and alliteration was the first thing that came to my head."
"Is that contagious?" said Will.
"Not as far as I know," said Elizabeth, "Now, I'm just popping out-"
"Where?" said Will quickly.
"I have to go and see Hannah! If you remember, that was the whole reason we WENT on the quest for the Big Pink Pretty Albeit Cursed Diamond."
"Well, don't take the bait," said Will warningly, "You know what she's like."
"I can handle it!" said Elizabeth heatedly.
*****
"So what are the symptoms of Blacksmith's Blight?" said Governor Swann curiously. Will sighed inwardly and wondered what was taking Elizabeth so long.
"Uh, not much. Just, uh, slight headaches, halitosis and - brittle fingernails."
"Brittle fingernails?" said Governor Swann, nodding, "Hmm."
"But it's really, really contagious between men, so we might not come and visit you much," said Will, "Like, once every year. If that. Purely out of health reasons of course."
"Of course," nodded Governor Swann, looking relieved.
Suddenly they heard some angry muttering coming towards them. "Uh-oh," thought Will. The door burst open, and Elizabeth came in, grumbling rapidly about Hannah.
"Nice visit at your friend's?" asked Governor Swann. Will was amazed that someone could have so little tact. Elizabeth said nothing but sat down dramatically in one of the chairs, still grumbling. She remained grumbling for the rest of the evening, and it was only when they went upstairs - still in separate rooms, on the Governor's orders - that she vented her fury.
"That evil, evil BITCH! She says that the quest can't have been that TOUGH if you managed to complete it, and not only that, her father's just been KNIGHTED!"
"Knighted?" said Will. Elizabeth glared. "I mean, knighted? Who wants to be knighted? I mean, the number of people who get - bruised shoulders..."
"Nice try," said Elizabeth drily.
"So, what does it matter? We're moving to Rum Island. You won't see her ever again. AND you have the Big Pink Pretty Albeit Cursed Diamond."
"Yes, I know," said Elizabeth, smiling and pulling it out of her pocket and gazing at it fondly. "But still, we need to beat her again!"
"Again?" said Will dejectedly, "How are we going to this time?"
"Find a quest that others have already failed on!" beamed Elizabeth.
"How many more cursed pirate crews are there OUT there?" said Will in horror.
"Oh, tons! There's Rob Roy and the Scotsmen, Blackbeard and his scurvy rogues, Lord Burnand and his jolly band of rotters, the Dark Scourge of the Caribbean, Hot Female Pirate Front of Tortuga-"
"Oooh," said Will. Elizabeth glared. "I mean, uh, wow, there's a real mix."
"Yup! But you know what we need to do."
Will looked at Elizabeth's face. "Oh no. Again?"
"Of course we need Jack Sparrow! What sort of Disney trilogy will it be without him?"
"Fine, fine, fine," said Will, "But we'll wait for him to meet us."
"OK!" beamed Elizabeth, "But can we go to Tortuga then, on the way to Rum Island? And, uh, hang out in the pubs?"
"Not to wait for Jack Sparrow by any chance?" said Will.
"Oh come on! Where else is he going to be? We've got to give him a chance, we're not exactly going to find him at Alcoholics Anonymous, are we?"
"Judging that it hasn't been invented yet, I'd guess not." Will sighed. There went his idea of just settling down and being a blacksmith.
So that evening, after a tearful farewell back at the Governor's house and Will had lugged Elizabeth's belongings down to the Dauntless, having just returned from a fruitless trip to Isla de Muerta, (Commodore Norrington had been ordered to sail with them as far as Tortuga at least) they set sail from Port Royal. As they sailed from the harbour, Will looked overboard, and saw a turtle swimming along with another turtle in the beautiful turquoise water.
Suddenly another shark swam up and ate both of them. "Hope that's not foreshadowing," said Will worriedly.
*****
Do you want to be in this fanfic? It's just that I need some more characters. If so, go to my bio, where there's a form to fill in, and send it on over to me! I'm not taking everyone though, unlike last time, cos the boat just got toooo crowded. See you all next update! (waves)
Not all Treasure is Silver and Gold
Chapter 1 - Guess what, another quest
"Here we go," said Elizabeth. She and Will had just returned to Port Royal, and were preparing to break it to Governor Swann that his little daughter was moving with the local blacksmith to Rum Island, the renowned rum trader of the Caribbean which was twinned with Tortuga. Will himself had taken the liberty of carrying a pistol with him along with Stabby, his lucky sword.
"Hey, here's a thought," said Will, "Maybe he'd take it better if I, er, wasn't there?"
"How would that make it better?" said Elizabeth.
"Well, I'd have a head start for when he ran after me challenging me to a duel," said Will. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.
"Come on Will. Be manly!"
"This is manly! Avoiding responsibility!" protested Will.
"You may enter now," said a butler.
"See you," said Will, darting out of the front door before she could object, leaving her with a terrified look on her face. As he headed off down the drive, he heard "YOU'RE MOVING WHERE?!?!?!" As he reached the gate, he heard, "RUM ISLAND?!?!?!?!?" so he rightly assumed she had clarified the point. He decided that he would spend two hours before returning as opposed to just one.
Later, while he was grabbing all his things in the forge - as Mr Brown was asleep he took the liberty of taking his 'cut' from the money in the box in the corner and several swords and other tools - Elizabeth came in.
"Well?" said Will, "How did it go?"
"It all went fine!" said Elizabeth brightly. Too brightly.
"Elizabeth?" said Will warily, "What did you tell him?"
"I, erm," said Elizabeth, "Just that, um, you were..." She trailed off, mumbling the last words indistinguishably.
"What?"
"I said you were, um, dying," she said finally.
"YOU WHAT???"
"I told him that you were leaving me all your money when you died!" said Elizabeth.
"What money?" said Will bewilderedly.
"From your father's estate."
"WHAT estate?"
"Lie a little, lie a lot," shrugged Elizabeth. She raised an eyebrow and smiled. "At least he'll be off our backs until your 'tragic demise'."
"What did you say I was dying from?" said Will.
"Uh, Blacksmith's Blight," said Elizabeth sheepishly, "He kept shouting about how you were just a blacksmith, and alliteration was the first thing that came to my head."
"Is that contagious?" said Will.
"Not as far as I know," said Elizabeth, "Now, I'm just popping out-"
"Where?" said Will quickly.
"I have to go and see Hannah! If you remember, that was the whole reason we WENT on the quest for the Big Pink Pretty Albeit Cursed Diamond."
"Well, don't take the bait," said Will warningly, "You know what she's like."
"I can handle it!" said Elizabeth heatedly.
*****
"So what are the symptoms of Blacksmith's Blight?" said Governor Swann curiously. Will sighed inwardly and wondered what was taking Elizabeth so long.
"Uh, not much. Just, uh, slight headaches, halitosis and - brittle fingernails."
"Brittle fingernails?" said Governor Swann, nodding, "Hmm."
"But it's really, really contagious between men, so we might not come and visit you much," said Will, "Like, once every year. If that. Purely out of health reasons of course."
"Of course," nodded Governor Swann, looking relieved.
Suddenly they heard some angry muttering coming towards them. "Uh-oh," thought Will. The door burst open, and Elizabeth came in, grumbling rapidly about Hannah.
"Nice visit at your friend's?" asked Governor Swann. Will was amazed that someone could have so little tact. Elizabeth said nothing but sat down dramatically in one of the chairs, still grumbling. She remained grumbling for the rest of the evening, and it was only when they went upstairs - still in separate rooms, on the Governor's orders - that she vented her fury.
"That evil, evil BITCH! She says that the quest can't have been that TOUGH if you managed to complete it, and not only that, her father's just been KNIGHTED!"
"Knighted?" said Will. Elizabeth glared. "I mean, knighted? Who wants to be knighted? I mean, the number of people who get - bruised shoulders..."
"Nice try," said Elizabeth drily.
"So, what does it matter? We're moving to Rum Island. You won't see her ever again. AND you have the Big Pink Pretty Albeit Cursed Diamond."
"Yes, I know," said Elizabeth, smiling and pulling it out of her pocket and gazing at it fondly. "But still, we need to beat her again!"
"Again?" said Will dejectedly, "How are we going to this time?"
"Find a quest that others have already failed on!" beamed Elizabeth.
"How many more cursed pirate crews are there OUT there?" said Will in horror.
"Oh, tons! There's Rob Roy and the Scotsmen, Blackbeard and his scurvy rogues, Lord Burnand and his jolly band of rotters, the Dark Scourge of the Caribbean, Hot Female Pirate Front of Tortuga-"
"Oooh," said Will. Elizabeth glared. "I mean, uh, wow, there's a real mix."
"Yup! But you know what we need to do."
Will looked at Elizabeth's face. "Oh no. Again?"
"Of course we need Jack Sparrow! What sort of Disney trilogy will it be without him?"
"Fine, fine, fine," said Will, "But we'll wait for him to meet us."
"OK!" beamed Elizabeth, "But can we go to Tortuga then, on the way to Rum Island? And, uh, hang out in the pubs?"
"Not to wait for Jack Sparrow by any chance?" said Will.
"Oh come on! Where else is he going to be? We've got to give him a chance, we're not exactly going to find him at Alcoholics Anonymous, are we?"
"Judging that it hasn't been invented yet, I'd guess not." Will sighed. There went his idea of just settling down and being a blacksmith.
So that evening, after a tearful farewell back at the Governor's house and Will had lugged Elizabeth's belongings down to the Dauntless, having just returned from a fruitless trip to Isla de Muerta, (Commodore Norrington had been ordered to sail with them as far as Tortuga at least) they set sail from Port Royal. As they sailed from the harbour, Will looked overboard, and saw a turtle swimming along with another turtle in the beautiful turquoise water.
Suddenly another shark swam up and ate both of them. "Hope that's not foreshadowing," said Will worriedly.
*****
Do you want to be in this fanfic? It's just that I need some more characters. If so, go to my bio, where there's a form to fill in, and send it on over to me! I'm not taking everyone though, unlike last time, cos the boat just got toooo crowded. See you all next update! (waves)